4ALongerLife

How long have you been grazing? Is it just since he's gotten home? Or did you start if/when things changed in your relationship? I am a grazer, especially whenever I am stressed. It's really easy to let it go and get out of hand so kudos to you for coming back when you feel like it's "out of control" at only 10 lbs. To me, it sounds like much more is going on in your life and I suggest telling him what kind of stress this has put you under. If he doesn't listen, or if you can't talk rationally... I highly suggest counseling. For you separately (for food issues) and for you and your boyfriend (for couples counseling). You mentioned that he quit his job because he's scared you'll cheat on him. You guys have much more going on that what we can help you with here I assume. That emotional thing with food, I have it too. It's a truly hard thing, I am in no way "cured" but I think talking to someone about it can help. Especially whenever it comes to your bf leaving his job and putting you under 30k less income - that's a lot of stress. In the interim, make sure that you only have "good" Snacks - make a list of what you can graze on and stick to it so that you are remaining at your 1300 calories a day (i.e. carrots, celery, sf Jello, 100 cal snack packs in moderation, etc). I use my fitness pal to track my intake. I'm no where perfect but I'm honest with what goes in my mouth. That might help you as well - tracking it and seeing where you are doing and when you are doing what you are doing (how you are feeling when it's happening). It's made me see it. Are you working out in any way? I just ask because do that whenever you find you are grazing. And ask yourself "am i physically hungry or just wanting to eat"? If you are physically hungry, ok. If not, go for a walk! Do anything else. Sorry IDK that I had much for you on answers.... but I hope my post helps. Best of luck and kudos to you for trying to address this now, before it gets out of hand.

Hey! You are pre-surgery and relatively close to my area (I'm in Carrollton). Baylor Plano has monthly support group meetings. I think it's second wed. of the month... if you can make it next time, hope you will come! You CAN do this!

Wait, have you had WLS? Or just considering it? I have seen MANY a successful story from SEVERAL diabetic WLS candidates. You CAN turn this around with sleeve. For me, I worked out for years and could never keep the weight off "for good." I don't have diabetes (yet) but had the surgery because I could see the road that I was going down. And I was 110 lbs. overweight prior to surgery. About 15 lbs. left to go and I am doing 4-6+ miles a day (I am a workout fiend according to some, so... IDK if that's atypical or not).

For me, the shots made me literally WRETCH, as did Isopuke (sorry to those that like it). Try Cytosport's Whey Isolate RTD drinks that they sell at Vitamin shoppe... I loved Tangerine and Tropical. They have them in the refrig section too!

Cytosport's whey Isolate RTD drinks - in tangerine and tropical. I loved them! They sell them at Vitamin shoppe and they have them in the refrigerated section so you can buy one and try it first. Different kinds of nectar syntax Protein packets (I think I bought the sample pack online from BJ's Bariatrics.. 13 for $13 I think). And SF Jello and SF popsicles of course. Hmm ... protein enriched jello. I'm thinking of what else.....

It is probably head hunger but might be stomach acid. I believe I had it too, I called it ghost pains (head hunger in reminiscence lol). Ask your dr. about PPIs (like pepcid) if you aren't already taking one. Cheri suggested it to me and it helped! And for what you are eating, you probably DO need 4 to 5 mini meals. Seems like early on, I couldn't eat much at once so I was eating more frequently. Just be careful because this is NOT a behavior you want to continue once you progress into solids.

I am LOVING the Wylers brand sugar free sleeves but my fav kind is "cherry limeade." Of all places, I found it at Family Dollar as I went on a wild goose chase for those crystal light mocktini's that I read on another thread. They didn't have them there, but thank God I tried this kind - and I LOVE IT. I'm up to 14 glasses of Water most days (and I hate water in all honesty). Hang in there girl - it gets easier in time. It's very frustrating in the beginning. And most Protein powders, to me, taste like a monkey's butt. Sorry... I know you have to have them in the beginning, but.... I did like the power pak pudidngs at GNC/Vitamin Shoppe, but in chocolate. Vit Shoppe has a refrig section where you can try before you buy and save your receipts and you can bring back w/in so many days (even opened containers).

I work out daily (except Sundays) and usually do an hour on the elliptical or the stair monster, as I affectionally call the basturd. lol. I have been eating 700-900 calories; however, last week, I have noticed an uptick in my calories. My job is changing and change in life for me is a stress and equates a trigger. Wish it wasn't because change is inevitable, but... it's where I'm at now. So at most I go to 1300 but usually 1000 to 1100. I feel like my body does better at 800 ish whenever I'm trying to lose weight. Probably 1300-1500 if and when I get to maintenance, but I totally give myself the option to change that as I am a woman (and that's what we seem to do, lol) and IDK because I've never stayed in maintenance long enough and concentrated on my caloric intake long term to know. I was a self pay, so I don't have a NUT. So please note, I am probably like the "blind leading the blind" writing a response, but here you go for my two cents. Please don't attempt to spend it elsewhere lol. Simply said.... DO focus on Protein, exercise and Water. Continually challenge yourself with your workouts, vary what you eat but focus on protein intake first and Clear liquids in between meals. The rest? It just seems to fall into place.

Yep, it's hard to tell the "intent" or the "voice" of the written word sometimes. I remember how hard it is to think straight on the preop diet. And I thankfully only did mine for a weekend before surgery. I can't fathom 5 whole days w/o food then smelling hamburgers. I don't miss them now, but I also can be satisfied on 700 to 900 calories a day. OMG I used to watch those makeover shows and every single person they'd put on there were restricted to 1200 calories. I remember thinking OMG I would die if I did that. Ain't life funny how quickly it can change? You'll have a few moments where you have to stop and think. Ordering in a restaurant after surgery is still one for me (5 months out, 6 next month) even! It's a learning experience this WL journey... some good, some bad, but we've all been there, done that! (or pretty much)

hey.. make SURE you see what i just posted for you. there are some threads on here where you just have to ignore words/expressed thoughts. ah, so is life. no worries ok?

Kimberlee, if your surgery is that close, part of what you are feeling is fear. Does any of this sound familiar to the voices going on in your head: Am I doing the right thing.. omg I'm scared... what if this happens... what if this doesn't happen.... what about my love for food, how is that going to change. C'mon EVERYONE.. give the girl a break. We can all say that was a bratty moment if that's the wording you wish to use, but stop raking her over the coals. I know my arse has had quite a few of such moments.... especially right before surgery and especially whenever I've lost so much weight too fast and my body hasn't realized it and is making wayyyy too much estrogen. So here's what I got for you! What you are feeling.. it's NORMAL. I believe these co-workers can probably understand some of that too if you are close like you said you are, so they surely blew it off. All I can do is this - encourage you. Please do NOT worry too much... your surgery and recovery will go fine. Just FOLLOW THE DR'S ORDERS. Do not rely on this board to give you all the right answers or directions. All of our dr's are different in some sort or fashion in the diets they use, views they express but they are the ones that know best (due to experience and years in medical school). What I can provide for you is this - if you ever need a friend, pls know you have one right here in Dallas, TX. (You can always reach out to me if needed.) Remember this mantra - you will need it for the next several weeks: THIS TOO SHALL PASS. Reach into your depths of emotion and find your inner strength ... this journey will make you find it, several times. It IS NOT easy. It IS NOT a magic wand. But one thing you have to remember - rejoice that you have the blessed opportunity to change your life because THIS WILL change your life. So no fears my dear ...... just hope. You got me? Prayers and blessings wished for you as I wrote every single long winded word (and continue to do so) .... hang in there! xx

My hospital has mugs that they give patients, I asked for extra ones before I left... but you can buy them I think as well at their gift shops. They are 28 oz.s so I do that 4 times a day.

I think because you are on the pre-op diet, you feel more emotional and frustrated than you would normally. After surgery, after you return to work, you are going to have many more times and experiences such as this one. It is a learning experience (plural, as several more experiences are sure to come) for sure! You'll be surprised several times too about ppl that you think are your friends and how they will change due to your weight loss. And your own changes are going to be so many. Every day my head still has much more work to do than any amount of weight loss. Hang in there! It has only just begun.....

I pray every day that I have the strength to be where you are. Thanks for sharing your thoughts and words as well as time - it is inspirational!

grr how do you attach on here? i've got old and new ones in my acct actually. i can tell the diff in my face fo sho! (89 lbs and counting down! woo hoo!)

Ruh roh, NDN_RN, watch it... Dr. Jay is beloved. I see your apology... thanks for posting that as it is so easy to get lost on a thread and/or misinterpret. Dr. Jay is (from what I know) a health behaviorist and is very good at his job. He was attempting to challenge the group's thoughts on food and in their WLS journeys. He wants us to be aware of what triggers and challenges we face so that we can overcome them, but to know that there are failures. I believe he is trying to challenge us to think this way: so what are we going to do to fight to NOT be one of them? (meaning one of the failures) It's not an easy exercise to do, but I like that he challenges us. He really gets you to think on items that are second nature (i.e. triggers) and reactions that you may not even be aware of. I know that many addicts lie to themselves about how bad their addiciton truly is. I believe he helps even those (or maybe I should say us), which is no small feat. He's really good to us & at his job..... Just say'n! Believe me, I didn't want to hear that it takes 60 to 90 minutes of cardio exercise to lose weight... I don't remember if it's daily or what a week, but I do mine now 6 days a week, usually 60+ minutes now. Eventually I hope to get to 90 mins of cardio a day, and I'd love to do it at one time, but that's pure endurance training for me. (not that it has to be done at one time, mind you)... but he's helped me be more successful by telling me that. I now am challenging my limits much more and I believe it's helped me Healthwise in pushing through my stalls, as well as give me more confidence in a way too. Unfortunately I also curse much more (under my breath) but at least it's directed at the stair master lol! (hey nobody's perfect!) lol

I had a HUGE appetite prior to surgery. I am 5 months (almost 6) out now. I still get hungry, but cannot do that much as my tummy hurts if I push my limit. So I choose to stop prior to that, trying to listen to my body telling me, so that I am redoing my "cues"... eating "mindfully" as my health behaviorist says. I don't always do well, but I am trying. I still get hungry though, fyi.

from carbs to crack? wth? um, i'd HIGHLY suggest a new psych. this one sounds a tad cukoo to me.

Ok so I have a bachelors and masters in social work of all things. I wanted to be a counselor in the long run and it was interesting course work, as well as I was young and wanted to "make the world a better place" blah blah. That being said... there are MANY people who go into such professions or career paths to FIX themselves. They have issues. (hmm, is applicable to me as i am in the category); however, I digress.... the point is... what do YOU want? ok, what i think i know on bypass: you are supposed to lose more weight with it if you are significantly overweight (not that i'm saying you are! just clarifying... but i think this is questionable and to be determined as there hasn't been enough research yet on VSG/aka sleeve at this time); however, you have dumping issues, malabsorption issues and from the latest thing i read on something here, if you don't make the stomach smaller, will you in the long run eat less with bypass (that they also refer to as RNY)? sleeve doesn't have malabsorption issues (you have to take a Multivitamin and Calcium citrates after surgery, then i also take Biotin as you will lose some hair, you will... just know and accept it). sleeve's biggest complications that i know of are leaks (which i had and it sucks but... it's over). i can eat anything that i want, i just eat much much less..... i have seen some people have gallbladder issues after surgery, some that have sever heartburn. i don't know the percentages on it, but know these are drawbacks that have existed and been experienced by others. hmm what else.... ok so if any of this is inaccurate, politely tell me so. that's what i recall in my rushed reply. and i believe you should tune in to YOUR VOICE. what do you want? listen to that, know your wants are VALID and fight for what you want. i believe so many of us overweight persons have learned to no longer believe in ourselves, to invalidate our wants/needs which is such an easy message we get from every facet in this world... and that's one of the biggest things in this journey i'm learning to be confident in. listening to what i want and knowing that it's ok. and that i'm totally f'n worth it. just know that you probably have a food addiction. i know i do and it's one ugly beast to get rid of. but the sleeve, to me, is a great tool to help fight it. sorry for my rambling... wish you only the best! xx

ok the 80/20 reference is as amy said, 80 % are successful and 20% of sleevers regain their weight that they lost (and are unsuccessful). hope that clears it up!

I have to say, 5 months out, I still struggle with telling people sometimes. Yes, mostly now I don't care, but who's business is it what I've done? I would not encourage any false stories though like hiatial hernia repair or gall bladder surgery because IF you do eventually decide to be honest with everyone, it taints your integrity. People may wonder what other false things you have said. Not that it matters, but..... Just say you are changing your eating habits (and working out, if that is the case). It's not a lie because WLS won't get you entirely to your goal.... so I'd encourage you to say something more along the lines of that. Best of luck!

Amy, I'm sorry! I just saw your post. I haven't been on here as much as usual and the post that you made, the notification JUST showed up in my inbox. I didn't come say hi, but saw you again this past thursday (I came in late this week, sat in the corner that is catecorner to the entryway, where I saw you sitting). I will say hello this week for sure. I have to admit, I had to stop at the way that I read how you described me. The girl who is close to goal and is a workout fanatic. My mind has not yet caught up with my weight loss that has occurred in the past 5 months .... and am I a fanatic about working out? I do it alot, but I'm pushing myself to be successful. So I guess.... omg, yes, that IS me. I have 20 lbs more to lose until I reach my own goal and in honesty - I'm frightened, worried that I won't do it. I've lost 80 or so lbs. before and gained it all plus some back. My mind cannot fathom, why's this time different? At 6 months, I read many stall and then weight doesn't come off - will that be me? Then I hear that 20% regain and I AM a grazer, I track every bite in MFP but I am ashamed of the way my daily records look to be honest for the grazing. Sorry, I'm rambling now I believe.... but hopefully my thoughts are the same ones another has & let's encourage one another on how to get through these thoughts and effectively/eventually changing such behaviors. It's a WLS journey, not just an easy fix. That's why Need A Sleeve, how you started this thread, it really inspired me. You're take on "that means 80% are successful".... I like how you perceived the message that Dr. Jay delivered, not focusing on the negative but reframing it to view the positive. I bet you money you WILL be successful if you remain to keep such a positive view.

Girl, so sorry on your experience. Did your dr. not tell you to get something like Mirolax then? With such a high protein diet, and lack of fiber, you need something to "keep it moving." About every 3 days, if you don't go void on your own, take a capful of Mirolax (it looks like white sand, you mix it in a drink and it doesn't taste). By the next day, things usually move along. Just a suggestion! Glad something else wasn't wrong. But why in the world doesn't the ER know more about sleeve? That's the scary part to me.....

OMG you go girl! You look STUNNING!