Jennifur

Hey ya'll Debbie - thanks - horrible nightmare, I waited like a lost little puppy for 19 years - lots more mess but that pretty much sums it up. Gave up a marriage proposal from my best friend from 15 because I "was in love" what a dumb ass I was. Anyway, obviously I still have lots of anger but you know what I'm not going to do again... Tracy - I recall the beginning stages of your family mess, I'm really happy for you and hope they stay this way for Macy's sake. I know how horrible that is since Kev's mother vanished when I had DS, so she bailed on her granddaughter and never got to know ds. Crap - the heat just turned on, it must be cold Well - I guess I should go to bed, I'm never going to get up I still hurt, but left a message to start p/t and I'm going to follow up with my primary too. I'll get over it, always do have a good night, I'll talk to ya'll in the am PS... Plain - nice to see ya' back... I can see you are a bit of a trouble maker aren't you???

Well, I'm off to get ready to go, have to pick up dd, and bday present for my neice and get up to water park, which is over hr away. I am not sure if I'm actually going to play in the park or study - or do a little work. my BIL is going to be there and I have some issues with stuff old boss is saying, and I'm concerned the company is going to be in deep shit Well have a wonderful day all

Good morning ya'll I think its time to go back to the dr, I've had horrible pain in my lower stomach since my accident and it goes and comes right back, I can't sleep and the pressure is horrible, right about where my seatbelt was. I can't wait for my fill too, I need to stop eating - no excuse but I know I'm eating for comfort. Kev just doesn't get what he did to me for 19 long hard years and I just want to be happy - and because of him I am afraid to trust anyone, and the one good, real thing I found is gone - I'm more confused than ever. Well I'm off to have another cup of coffee Tracy - hope you are having a good weekend

Well good morning all I lost a lot of my thoughts, I'm just chugging along, drinking coffee and relaxing - I slept 10 hours and probably would still be sleeping if DS didn't wake me up. I don't think I got 10 hours of sleep this week I'm going to work on yard this weekend - I want to get it all finished for the winter/puppy I hope you are all having fun

Good Morning all Late but wanted to check in - What a bunch of great input and reality check! I am going in for my 4th fill next month - but just getting topped off, I am sure I am down to 1cc and yes it is that I can eat, but I have a tool and I know it gives me the reality check at 1.5cc so I'm going to get back to that but I've never done the fill unfill game, I am good at 1.5 and that is it. Tracy - congrats Cindy - I love dirt cake hi all - got to go

Well - now I'm way late, I'll finish posting when I get home later -- I hope you all have a great day Kat - I love halloween - i just got invited to great party so maybe i'll go Tracy - I'm so proud of you! Suzanne, Debbie, Cindy, Michelle and all I've missed HI!!!

Hi everyone quick check in, I went to work yesterday at 6:30 and well... just got home for the first time in 2 days I'm so tired, struggling to stay awake hope to email in the am. night all

Hi all quick fly by post. Just in from fd monthly meeting and going to bed, I'm working a long hard day tomorrow. Work at 6:30 home about 5 fd drill at 7 then back to work until midnight or so going to be a long day Tracy - I'm so proud of you Suzanne - You have come a long way and what great accomplishments this year I lost all thoughts - I'm off to bed

Morning running late... have a wonderful....

ok i just bought my carpet cleaner at walmart.com 97cent shipping so I did it. I want clean carpets Going to buy a garage door opener Thursday off to clean the garage

HOLA Tracy - glad you are getting there~ I wish I could come visit, and I can fly without drugs. I think I'm just not able to take time off of work but I am going to come visit -who knows, maybe I will get a job there next year and stay for a year or 2

I was going to say It has not been that long for me, but I think longer since my family was telling me how fat and horrible I was at 4 years old.... so It would be about 36years for me. It is sad, and ironic - we are here in lapband world and me personally - have acknowledged and realized why I am where I am - I just can't let go and will never see what anyone else does. That pic I posted - that is now how I see myself, and I never will - all I saw in that was the rolls in my shirt and why they won't go away

Good Morning all Plain - why am I not responding to you???? where are you I want company - someone come visit me..:tt2: So - I sent Kev a text last weekend for insurance cards and well... you know what that turned into - I miss you, i can't live without you - I'm so sorry - I'll do whatever it takes.... Does he not remember what he has not only done to me but to our children? I gave up my life for him and waitied like a lost freaking puppy for 19 years and he doesn't see why he wouldn't have a chance of getting me back - He doesn't even care that I told him I was seeing someone who I let into my life and if he didn't move away - I could spend the rest of time with - but... he did move away, so thatis not an option, but neither is going back to that lie I lived for so many years. and I'm sure this is why I hae gone to hell and gained 10lbs this week, oh that and being sick. Well - I'm going to get some breakfast - I'm hungry

YIPEE I passed the test without study and feeling like I got run over Heading to bed, have to work tomorrow at 6 but I'm going to shut down and bring my laptop with me so I can get some stuff done Have a great night, I'll check in from work

Good Morning ya'll Angela - I don't think I did well on the test but I'll find out tonight, but if I fail I can re-take it toniht after we review and do class, he has a back up, same test different order. I wouldn't be proud of myself but it will be ok Debbie - i didn't know they had mini bypass surgery. I went to dr last night, sprain in my neck, and the only reason I got to go was because it is under no fault, i don't have ins. My pa I waited a week to get into see went to work with my band dr full time, I told her I needed insurance and needed a fill. I love her and I need a fill. I'm out of control. Anyway, my neck is bad and my ribs, she put me on the ultrasound machine for 10 mins and gave me pain pills, I was in bad shape last night from the day yesterday, I almost couldn't walk last night. I'm a little foggy but slept wonderful and feel much better this am. I told her I just want to be able to hold my head up straight again. anyway - off to get ready for work. I am sleeping in until noon tomorrow, I'm so exhausted

Hi Ya'll Neen - welcome, nice to have you Tracy - Are you feeling better even if you are queezie? What you doing with yourself during the day? I miss ya Suzanne - that is so very kind of you to say, I wish I could see myself as others see me - plus I'm bouncing 10lbs, which is not helping me right now Kat - how is Izzy doing? I can't wait to see pics! Are you guys getting those crazy storms? My mom is in AZ and the tornados hit 20 miles from her house OK - Have to get ready to go to the dr for a follow up

Morning all off to work - have a good day

off to class...

Morning ya'll wow I feel like I was just here... oh wait... I was Have a wonderful...

Well all, I surived another night, have a test I'm not ready for tomorrow, I'll be studying at lunch Off to bed, 4am comes way early

Morning all I showered last night so slept in this am. My dd is having breathing issues (she will be fine, I think she has a cold on top of regular fall crapola) so she is going to stay home today so I don't have to get the kids up. Yuck going to be cold and rainy for the next couple of days - yucky. I have drill tonight and have to study for test tomorrow. We are doing practicals this week, I did ok, need to practice practice practice. I'm going to read the script every day and use dd as a test dummy a couple times a week. Did I tell ya'll there is a girl who is a cna and volunteer for ems - must be with fd - but she is on her 3rd rotation of the class because she failed it 2 times already. Last night being our first real practical, I realized something- that should not freak me out. She should give up her calling. After doing the class and state exams 2 times already she should have nailed the practical, she had to keep looking at the script/exam. It might be time for her to realize this may not be her calling. I did ok for first time, My fear of the whole thing is the anxiety of acting, but once doing it on a real person it took the pressure off. Well, off to get dressed - I have a huge knot in the back of my neck, can't wait to go back to the dr tomorrow. Have a wonderful everyone HI TRACY

Hi all Tracy - lol don't stress yourself... I'll be stressed enough for the both of us. DS's BDay is 11/7 and I don't even have a clue what we are doing Suzanne - You are good, I look up mine every fall and start a fire... LOL Tried it out last night.. how nice Plain - how nice, our state fair is 5 hours away Kat - how are you feeling Well, off to get ready for class... Have a wonderful

Good Morning ya'll Thanks Suzanne - I know but its what I've done for years, I don't know if I'll ever see myself like I am Kat - that is amazing, you got some good deals! I have class this week, and then no school for a week! I am going to get caught up on yard work and get everything in the back yard "Puppy proofed" before the snow starts. Going to get the garage cleaned out and ready to start parking in there. I need a new garage door opener next week too. That is one thing I'm not living without Every week I'm going to get a xmas present or 2 and so I can be done - the 800 dog is the big present but I still have a little one and Santa has to come. His big santa present is a new bike. Summer is over now time to spend on winter stuff. LOL Hope you all have a great day - It is cold here only going to be 57 today, I'm not sure if I'm ready for this. Have out a turtle neck and going to wear my winter coat I'm off, 15 mins to leave

Hey all Cindy - thanks and she did have a great time, said it was the best dance she has been to Tracy - HELLO... this is me... of course I don't see how I look to other people ROFL Really - you know I tell myself at least once a day how fat I look when I pass a mirror How did you enjoy your quiet day?? Sometimes they are always good. Just home from FD - nice turn out long day off to have dinner and get ready for the week

Hi everyone Rain - How cute he is... and they sure are worth every lb= he looks like such a happy baby Vicki how are you doing? How is aquatherapy? I was in a car accident last week, I'm going back to dr on Thurs and they need to put me in some kind of pt, My neck is so stiff I can't stand up straight and that scares me, I don't want that hump on my back, but it hurts to stand tall, so they have to fix.. oh and for my right ribs too. you can get the weight off, I have tons of faith in you That is me and my dd last night, she makes me feel so short, but thought i would share that. Hope all is well for all of you, I'm in school 4 nights a week and working full time so not on the computer that much - just wanted to pop in, miss ya'll