twold

So today marks the end of the holidays and I am now post surgery 4 weeks. I am waiting for my first fill in 2 weeks and am adjusting to the need to implement portion control. I did very well during these 4 weeks by losing quickly and then hit a flatline with a slight uptick in weight when I moved to solid foods last week. In my first entry I talked about that frustration of going up a little and decided that I needed to continue to maintain focus, which I did and since the first posting (4 days ago) I am down 3 pounds and feeling good about making good decisions. I am purposefully moving to amore soft foods diet to avoid weight gain and build up my portion control focus. This is working well and everyone in the household is adjusting well. It was nice to hear from my wife, who is very fit, that my change in focus on food and the fact that several times I said no, or I can't have that, actually helped her stay on track as well. That was very energizing for me to have that positive comment and helps me to stand to making the right decisions. Today we went to Pink's hot dogs (yeah not great for a bander) but I was able to have fun with the family and have very small bites of a hot dog (no bun) and leave satisfied and happy with the experience without impacting anyone else. I go back to work tomorrow and will have to make good decisions there, but will go in a little later than before to have a good, healthy, portion-controlled breakfast at home (used to get something on the way...bad decisions were always my problem), leaving only lunch to worry about. I am finding that eating out and fast food are not something I will do as much and with a little planning things are working well. So leaving this second post, pre-fill I am feeling good about my mental progress of changing my lifestyle, which is what I knew had to be done to make this work anyway. I have a mental plan and with good focus each stage will go well, as I enter stage 2 I feel good so far. Stage 1 - Pre Surgery I had to focus on making this real for me and admit that I had a problem (sorta my own individual 12 step program). I followed the Optifast 800 fairly well and cut out fast food. This allowed me to lose 70 pounds in the year leading up to my surgery. For the first time in a long time I saw some positive results in pictures and this added to the motivation. Stage 2 - this stage is my goal between now and Christmas 2012. My goal is to lose 70 more pounds. I intend to up my walking and exercise during this time with the goal of being at a low enough weight to use an elliptical machine in my home by the end of the year for additional excercise. I am hoping that the band will help me to internalize new, better eating habits with portion control to make this stage a success. Stage 3 - this stage will begin immediately upon completing stage 2, but hopefully no later that Christmas 2012. This stage is where I leave the crutch of the band and need to make the changes "biggest loser" style with excercise. I will be adding a full time gym membership expectation with this stage with the goal to lose another 70 pounds (this would be a combined 210 in 3 stages). This stage is targeted to be complete in regard to body change and weight loss by Christmas 2013. This is my lifestyle change stage and should lend itself to a much more active family set of activities. Beyond - I will asses my weight and body at the end of stage 3 and add new goals in regard to weight, fitness, body composition but from this point on I am in a balance lifestyle with a maintaining focus. This is a while out, but I believe good gools come from having the end in mind. So 2012 is beginning well for me and I hope to continue this journey to a new, improved me!

So I am now 3 weeks post op and waiting on my first fill. Went to see the doctor yesterday and asked if I could accelerate the fill but I need to wait for the port to fuse is scar tissue. The concern for me is that the first two weeks were great and I even lost 10 pounds but now I am into solid foods and my appetite is coming back, which is my main issue anyway. I did very well on the liquid Optifast 800 and am contemplating staying on that until the first fill to continue to loss since I have 3 weeks to go. I have lost just under 70 pounds since I was first saw the doctor to decide to go to lap band and it is noticeable in my face and upper body that I have lost weight. I want this to be a lifestyle change so I am trying to determine how to cope with the next 3 weeks until fill #1. I know that often it takes several fills to get it right which means 2 months between each and I have set what I hope is a reasonable goal of losing 70 pounds by Christmas of 2012. I have a secondary goal to join a gym and go once I drop below 300 which would be right around next holiday season as well. For me this is as much about changing how I think about food as it is about losing weight. My spouse is in shape as is my child, but no one in my family was growing up. My spouse does not want to understand the mental hangups I have and my weight has been an issue in our marriage so I know that I have to deal with this part on my own. It makes it difficult, but I am someone who likes a challenge. I was very open with everyone who knows me about doing the lap band; I think I was to force the issue on myself that I cannot not lose weight since everyone knows that I did the surgery. The procedure was a snap, I did not need any pain pills and was back at work in several days. So far so good, just now that I am not having issues with solid foods and need to wait three weeks for the first fill I am in my first challenge phase where I have to learn how to make good decisions about food. I have done well so far and after a couple of parties I am still down 7 from surgery date so I think I will be able to weather the time, but I need to stay focused and hopefully writing this down will be helpful for me.