rhiafaery

Yay!!! That is so amazing!

Wanted to update on this. The good news? So far I have managed NOT to gain anything. I haven't lost, but I've stayed within a half pound either way of the last weight at the surgeon's office. Yay, me! It's been SO HARD, though. I feel VERY disconnected from both my band and the habits I was only just beginning to learn with it's help. I have NO restriction whatsoever. I am running on sheer willpower, which, obviously, I don't have much of, or I never would have ended up here in the first place. Myfitnesspal has helped some. As well as I still will NOT eat bread, or pizza, or much Pasta. The better news? I only have to do this for one more week before I can start getting fills again. @marfar7, I hope you're feeling much better!

I just got back from my surgeon's office. The GOOD news...I have made it into ONEderland for the first time in OVER 20 years! 35 pounds down since surgery on 12/13/11, 79 pounds down altogether. O_o The BAD news...apparently my body works the opposite way of most everyone else's, in that the more weight I lost, the TIGHTER my band was getting, and I knew I was going to ask for a SLIGHT unfill because it was becoming steadily more difficult to eat over the past few weeks, but then last night I was up ALL NIGHT coughing, with horrifying heartburn and pain in my left shoulder. Plus I lost 14 pounds in 5 weeks, which SOUNDS good, but honestly, even *I* thought that was a bit too fast, mostly because I've been losing that much because I can't eat. The result? The doctor took out HALF my fill. I am SO scared that I will fall off the wagon, because before I had my LAST fill, wayyy back in the beginning of March, I had gained 3 pounds, then was doing SO well with 5cc (out of 10cc) in my band until it started tightening itself. Right now, though, I just feel relief from the almost constant uncomfortableness. I plan on doing liquids for the rest of the day today, even though an unfill doesn't necessarily require it, just because my left shoulder still hurts if I take a deep breath, and I want to make sure all that acid can work its way out. It would just be nice to have some support, and maybe stories from other people who had unfills and still did OK. I am going back in only 3 weeks (instead of 5-6) to check things out, and possibly start slowly filling again. I KNOW I can do it, but I just feel a little nervous. :/

*(*(*BIG hugs!!*)*)* PLEASE don't give up. You are SO worth it! adorkbl has excellent advice. Try to take it one step at a time, and don't think too much about the big picture. Just do ONE thing today that will move you toward your goal. Then do ONE thing tomorrow. Then do TWO things the next day. No matter how small. You can do it!! <3

Name, real or screen~ Tricia Goal weight for June 30th~ 190 Weight on June 1st~ 196 Age~ 39 Dietary goal for June~ consume less sugar/more Protein Exercise goal for June~ at least 4 times a week Personal goal for June~ WATER! Date banded~ December 13, 2011 Total weight loss since banding/pre op diet~ 80 pounds What is your favorite summer activity~ swimming, walking

You can add me if you like, I am chocl8girl over there!

Good luck!!!! <3

@betheboo I am so sorry you've been having a hard time! You CAN get back on track, I know it! @jachut wow, you are truly an inspiration! I hope everything has turned out well for you and that things are in remission. I fell off a little bit yesterday. I went out with a friend after work and had a glass of wine and ate over half of the Snacks we ordered, and this was AFTER I already was about 65 calories over my 1200 for the day. But I did NOT allow myself to beat myself up. My period is coming, and I needed a grown-up night out, and I still came in under 2000 calories, so it wasn't a total loss, and today has been another day to try again. Overall, so far, I feel like I have been doing OK, and that I can make it until my next fill appointment, at least with a neutral no-gain-no-loss status if nothing else lol.

*(*(*hugs*)*)* I understand how you feel all too well. Yesterday I completely fell off the wagon for just about the first time since my surgery 5 months ago. I went out after work with a friend and had a glass of wine and ate over half of the snacks we ordered together, even after I had ALREADY gone 65 calories over my 1200 for the day before I even got there. UGH. BUT, I completely agree with LoveTheNewMe, forgive yourself, let it go, and just keep moving forward. It's really hard, but I know we BOTH can do it! <3

Thank you guys so much for your encouragement, it means SO much to me! I am feeling NO restriction at all, and I can almost feel that little out-of-control demon sitting on my shoulder. But I refuse to listen to him. I can make it 3 weeks until my next fill, I KNOW it! Even if I don't lose anything, I plan on not GAINING anything, either.

Oh my goodness, that's hilarious! I, too, have kept a lot of my baggier undies, mostly to use as period panties lol, but even those are just becoming so extra baggy that it's not even worth it. Time to clean the drawers out yet again! You should definitely seek out some new, cute undies!

Brilliant. Thank you for this. I sabotage myself in ALL areas of my life, not just food. It's a pervasive issue with me, and one I think I am finally ready to really take a hard look at and figure out how to STOP. I have no idea how, but I am hoping that the knowledge and desire to do so will be enough to get me started...

I'm 5'1" and my goal weight is 150. The last (and only time ever lol) time I was at 150, I wore about a size 10 (I have a large frame), so I feel I would be quite comfortable there, but I guess we will see if/when I get there.

Oh my goodness, I have been wondering about this same issue lately! I think I am pretty much in my green zone right now, but it is DEFINITELY much harder to eat in the mornings. Although, luckily, I still cannot just eat whatever I want at night, but things do go down easier...it's so good to know I am not alone in this!

I'd love to do it!

Yay!!!!! I have done this twice already, because I have gone from a size 22 bottom/26-28 top to a size 16 bottom/18-20 top so far, and may even need to purge more things soon if things keep going this way. O_o I haven't been in these sizes in well over 25 YEARS! Shopping can be SO therapeutic...as long as you keep yourself from looking at the sizes that are still too small....lol

I TOTALLY understand how you feel. But you CAN do it, and you do NOT suck! I know LL ABOUT that kind of negative self-talk, and it does nothing but derail you from your real goals. I was able to eat mostly what I wanted all the way up until my second fill, and I actually had gained 3 pounds back at that appointment, and was SO discouraged. After that fill, however, things changed drastically. I am not QUITE sure if I have found my sweet spot, in fact, I may be a bit too tight right now, but my weight loss turned around and I am now 26 pounds down, 4 months out from surgery. Just keep trying to think positive and be a little patient while your body/mind figure things out. <3 As far as pizza, I tried a slice after my last fill, and it was the worst mistake I ever made. I actually got so stuck I ended up vomiting for the first time. I know in time I may try pizza again, maybe thin crust/half cheese this time, but for now, even THINKING about pizza makes me feel sick lol.

*(*(*hugs!!!*)*)* I know just how you feel. It is really, REALLY hard. The emotional comfort that eating gives me is gone, and I haven't quite learned how to fumble through it using other methods. Then it gets even harder when I have a stuck incident or the scale doesn't go down as much as I think it should and wonder what the heck I did to myself. But then I look at my kids and remember that THIS is part of why I did it. To be healthier for them, to be around for them, because they need me. And I need MYSELF to be the best person I can be. And remember, you have people to lean on who will support you. Let them help you! (This has been one of my most humbling lessons, as I am the most stubborn, independent person ever lol)

Hey there. First of all, Merry Christmas/Happy Holidays/whatever it is that you may celebrate! My name is Tricia, I'm 39, and I was banded a little less than 2 weeks ago. I normally never ever post on any forums, because I'm usually too shy, so I have no idea what I am doing. lol. But I figured I would give it a go here, because I'm doing this pretty much all alone and don't have too much support. I don't really know what to say, so I'll just start with saying that I've been overweight since I was about 10 years old, and had tried everything under the sun with varying degrees of success before resorting to banding. My highest weight ever was 298lbs. I started this particular journey at about 276lbs, although I did not make inquiries about the band until my weight was around 255lbs, so that is my official recorded starting weight with my doctor. I went into surgery weighing 232lbs, and am currently 222lbs, I think, almost 12 days post-surgery. My ultimate goal weight is around 150lbs, and I really hope to get there, or at least close! I have a good feeling about this, although I am undergoing some hardcore food mourning, and the fact that the holidays always get my severely down has not been helping at all. I hope that reaching out will give me some needed strength to get through this and follow what I am supposed to be following... Anyway, thanks for listening! <3