CowgirlJane

Sleeve saved my life and I am a big advocate. However, if you were my kid I would want you to try a lifestyle program first. I believe younger/less obese have a chance at that. If it doesn't work,'bariatric option is still there.

70 percent Of your EXCESS weight, right?

I had to move a bag of grain. Normally I would put on a handcart or wheelbarrow but was in a hurry so I carried it up a small hill to the feeding area. I put it up on my shoulder. Omg...within a minute my calves and legs were burning with that added weight on the climb. Then my back started in...then my knee joints...then I realized I felt like this ALL THE TIME pre weight loss. Absolutely incredible since I lost 160# post sleeve and now carrying 40 just about does me in. Makes me grateful for my success makes me remorseful for how badly my body was punished for decades by that weight.

I just got a check for $3.72 for something I don't believe ever hurt me (thank you class action lawsuits). Lapband hurt 10 years of my life...but I bear a role in that two. An apology for dashing my hopes and dreams and causing misery and suffering for a decade would be nice. You can t keep your 3 bucks and change. .

There are many approaches to this..including the "prove you are ready" theory. I came to understand when the disease of obesity becomes really advanced your physical drive to eat is almost overwhelming. At over 300 pounds. ..just moving around was painful. .forget about exercise. Luckily I was blessed with a surgical practice that helped me understand all this and it removed much guilt. I made no progress until I was sleeved and then I kicked butt. Maybe you are one of those?

As I keep saying. ..not the easy way out...for me..the ONLY way out. Heaven knows I tried everything.

I was banded in 2001 and experienced no noticeable hair loss. Also didn't make it to goal. Sleeved in 2011 and I did go through hair loss and got to goal...totally worth it. Thing is, you don't go bald, it grows back and over time it becomes an insignificant memory. I know that is hard to believe...but look at my before and afters...

Well I guess I have known all this...been at goal for awhile but it was the physical pain. And achy knees and joints that just kinda bopped me in the head. I continue to work on forgiving myself for this self abuse. I can't really in good conscious call it anything else.

I went through a no eating spell for emotional loneliness reasons. Your post reminds me of how I felt...only I was losing too much weight as I just couldn't eat. Anyway. ..get help before your health is comprised. It feels so good to be physically healthy again and your body and mind need good food to attain that. Wine can numb the pain but does not make you stronger and healthy. I also have some very practical tips for cooking and eating solo because that was an adjustment for me too. I suspect the despondency is more at the heart of things though. Hang in there... I was a caregiver for my little sister and know how terrible and difficult it can be at times. Just like they tell you on airplanes. ..you must have your own oxygen mask in place before you can help others. Get help getting your own oxygen flowing ASAP.

Dropped the calorie counting focus and moved to eating the way my body responds best.

So...has anyone considered the possibility that this obsession with calorie math is just another symptom of underlying issues with "relation with food"? Like most of you have been on enough programs to know that I lose weight when I restrict calories and am.more active. The exact numbers around that are simply not so predictable. Example... I never did low carb diets before sleeve presurgery diet. I believed in calorie math and so it made no sense to me. I found real success once I dropped the calories

Yes, weight loss surgery has some risks. Some of those risk are QUITE serious, including death. However, MOST people don't have those things happen. The "risk math" in my head when I decided to be sleeved was 1-5% chance of serious complication (I was a revision, so higher risk of leaks and bleeding) and very very low risk of death. I was 100% chance of early disability (it was happening already) and I would say very high chance of early death (morbidly obese father dropped dead at age 64 due to massive heart attack). For me, it was pretty obvious that the WLS risks were worth it because I had tried, tried and tried again and again to lose and maintain a weight loss without the sleeve and was not succesful.

My surgeon didn't give me a goal and here is why.... I had ALOT of weight to lose. They didn't want me to lose 100# and then feel like a failure because I didnt hit some magical number. What I did was create an initial goal, and hten a stretch goal and ran it by my NUT for approval. BTW, i exceeded my stretch goal.

Oh, and my friends Tom and Beth asked me about Scott... he was on a chartered fishing trip on Sat so wasn't there. Not to mention I haven't seen him since his daughter arrived 2 weeks ago. They were both "don't let this one get away" which i agree with... combined with "I effing hate being ignored." thing is i KNOW he wants to see me etc but I just really want more acknowledgement of my existance. He does kinda know he is in a little trouble though because when we talked yesterday his first comment was about how he will find time this week. What he doesn't know is how pissed off I am over it - it isn't the just not seeing each other, it is the general lack of contact. While I get it - daughter is absolutely #1 priority - it is complete BS he hasn't made time for us to go to lunch or something like that. It is that one track, OCD, single minded focus and I am afraid that over time it will be something I just cant live with. Besides, I want a sex life and I don't have one with him. Damn.

The last big party I hosted was a month after Linda died. Betty and I always did birthdays together and it was the last birthday party we did - back in 2007. Life is full of regrets, and one of them was not keeping somehow connected with Betty. By the time of her 50th, she was dying of brain cancer so no party there. This year I joked with my family that this was my 50th plus 1 since I was not in a hosting state of mind for my 50th (don't worry, friends took me out for an evening so it was noticed by someone even if my entire family blew by it) My friend Mary told me that I am such a good hostess... went around and talked to everyone, made sure everyone had someone to talk to (people didn't all know each other), made sure there were beverages and food flowing... all that kind of stuff. I enjoyed it alot and wasn't even aware I was being a good hostess... I was just in my element I think.

Buster's puncture wound seems to be healing properly and he shouldn't need surgery - thank goodness! He is a "senior" horse who I love dearly but I wasn't relishing being put in the position of having to decide how much money and time to spend on surgery and rehab.... The nursing care I am doing right now is a PITA, but it is paying off. My goal is to avoid cellulitis which is a big freaking deal on a horses leg. Anyway, not totally out of the woods, but encouraging. Oddly, even though he has a big draining hole in his leg, I am supposed to keep riding him... so been doing that! I found a few lost pounds due to wine and chips and stuff this weekend...sigh. That is okay, monday, back to protein drinks. Actually, I feel like this is my modified 5:2 although it is a crime to call it that. I am doing breakfast and lunch shakes and a protein/veggie dinner most days of the week. Then, I let myself "endulge" at events and parties and going out times... I can lose and maintain on that program because my body does respond well to the "variation" in calories/carbs. I find that not trying to stick to the 500 calorie thing helps me avoid the mood issues I was having with the more restrictive 5:2. trying to eat so low calorie/carb seems counterproductive to my good mental health! Key is to keep this up! Have we heard from Dee lately? I have gone completely blank on her user name otherwise I'd do one of those@ her BP names...

@@laguerr13 good post, but as a side note, some of us talk alot about clothing size, how we look etc because we have been at goal long enough that the obesity disease state is less.... pressing. I had WLS to extend my life and to keep me "able bodied" longer. I was becoming disabled and had life shortening co-morbidities. I didn't really have expectations to be trim - I just prayed to get and stay under 200# (at 5'5" still obese) However, my surgery was in 2011 I have been at goal (normal BMI/size) for about 2.5 years... so for me my daily focus IS more about clothes, looks, being able to stay active etc. It is isn't easy. Old habits.. and heck who am I kidding a normal American lifestyle/ways of eating always beckon... so you have to remain diligent but it is worth it. One of my brothers gave me a birthday part with a very obese unattractive woman on the card stuffing a huge piece of cake in her mouth and the card said "calories don't count on your birthday". I am not sure why he picked such an offensive card for me, but i choose to use it as my little mantra for this week "calories actually DO count no matter what day" I am not trying to say obsessively, but I had a big birthday party and I did eat some chips and some gelato BUT I mostly ate healthy and I ate lightly in the days before it to make up for it. I theorize normal people do that.

My party went great - what a fun, beautiful day. I used to love to host Christmas parties (indoors) and lawn parties in the summer but I stopped I guess after my sister died. It was so fun and reminded me of a part of life that I genuinely enjoy. I think i will do another event this summer!

Ah the drama continues. One horse has a puncture wound that requires a bunch of nursing... trying to prevent him from having to go to the horspital and have the wound cleaned surgically. I spent my friday night with my vet and his assistant... woo hoo... I know how to party! Other horse lost a shoe so horse shoer coming out in the middle of all my party chaos... yikes! I am excited about the peeps coming over soon though!

I have dry, fine, curly hair so I have switched over to the "no poo" method and essentially wash my hair with a detangling conditioner. I have been doing this for several years now - only shampoo when it is truly dirty from riding in the dust or something like that - perhaps 1-2x a month. Then I finish it with a defrizz/shine/curl enhancer type product and let it airdry. Easy peasy and I get alot of compliments on my hair. I just turned 51, and am still blessed with (mostly) brunette hair. I know it is vain, but my hair makes me feel feminine and beautiful. I know someday I will cut it short, but for now this works.

Haha! Good for you for donating! I have long thick hair. When I was losing I did lose hair. By the fistfull. Turns out it made my hair look better. Now I get it thinned. Oh, the irony.

Dr Sauceda keeps you in his clinic for about 3 days which is the way they are allowed to provide "narcotic pain management". I had multiple procedures done at once and I did NOT anything stronger than over the counter meds (probably didn't need them either really) once I got to the hotel for recovery. It is not a recovery house - if you go to obesity help and read Dr Sauceda forum there you will get the low down. The only pain I experienced was from some of the drain removal. Some were painless, but some had adhesions that smarted. Pain pills don't help with that kind of very short lived sharp pain anyway.

Well, I got sorted out the little mini drama with one of my sons... that was really bugging me so I feel much better now! Anyway, I have had 2 of 3 birthday celebrations - so fun. My best friend took me out on Wednesday for dinner. Thursday, my friend I went to Costa Rica with took me out on one of our local "wine walks" - very very fun! Saturday i am hosting a small BBQ with a few friends, family and even some of my sons' friends. By small I mean, fewer than 25 people..ha! So, I decided to kick myself in the butt and buckle down. 2 protein drinks and dinner. Just a few days of this and I have already lost 6 pounds. Yeah yeah, water weight that bounced on me very rapidly but it still feels great to be back in the neighborhood of my goal weight. I think if I can sustain this (more or less) for a month i will be back where I want to be - solidly under goal and NOT water weight. I have events planned including weekend long girls weekend etc so I will be far from perfect, but if I do it MOST days, it will work.

I lost 160 with sleeve - I have gained a few back but am within 5# of my goal. Surgeon I initially consulted with poo-poo'd the sleeve due to my high BMI and history of failure with lapband. I went to another surgeon who warned me that revisions didn't always do as well, but he felt sleeve was still a good choice for me. No regrets, but I do think you should have an open mind about other procedures if you have ALOT of weight to lose. You are pretty tall - what is your goal weight?

I agree that maintenance is in many ways harder. I had happen to me a pattern that I have seen on here... you become active and then due to something like an injury, your workouts are interferred with. You don't feel as good, aren't as toned... maybe the pounds don't come on, but your clothes are snug. You still fit in single digit clothes, but you feel like you are obese again. I have seen people who post about small regains and use words like how much they hate themselves, or how awful they look, or that they have failed. WHOA. I think it is really important to keep monitoring your weight closely, but also be careful of getting into "bad thinking" traps, seek support and frankly just be aware that regain happens. The key to "regain" is to stop it at a few pounds, not wait until it is a few hundred. I have lots of "naturally thin" friends in the over 50 age bracket. They all have to work at it so i remind myself of that when I am feeling sorry for myself! Carry on... what choice do we have?