CowgirlJane

During my brief stint with a personal trainer (who triggered overuse injuries and a bunch of rehab!) I tried the supplements they recommended and really didn't notice a difference. I want to increase muscle, decrease bodyfat percent in 2016, but not clear on why just increasing protein, and strength training won't acheive that? I would like

@@UalreadyKnow I didn't intend to be strident, just making the point that we are biased by our own experiences. Truly, need to check research over larger populations. The thing I was curious about pre op "do obese people live longer having WLS or not?" I never found that study. Time has made that question somewhat irrelevant because I find life at full tilt so much more exciting, fun and worth living...quality is better, quantity would be a bonus!

I have not seen any studies and I would be cautious of relying on anecdotal stories. My mom had skin cancer, my younger sister died of breast cancer and a grandmother had ovarian cancer - not a one of them had WLS. The longer I am at goal, the more I realize that the main benefit for me isn't extending my lifespan but actually creating a better quality of life while I am here. I was talking to a skinny mini girlfriend of mine that is the same age. Her mother is fading fast from dementia, and of course you imagine your own future.. right? She said she isn't really scared of dying anymore... she, like me, is more scared of "not living fully". In her case it isn't obesity, but she is making other life changes so that she can live a fuller more well rounded life.

@@VDB The point of my post wasn't intended to be about anxiety... what I was really driving at is the theme that everyone shared - that self care is SO important. I think you feel that this situation triggers stress eating for you, and maybe getting to the bottom of THAT issue is what my help you on your own personal health improvement journey. Speaking for myself, I can find reasons to overeat pretty regularly - ha - but part of my own personal transformation is to understand that an find (hopefully) healthier ways to cope. My example with my anxiety is to point out that I didn't even know I suffered from it until the masks were slowly peeled away....I have had to face this because I was mislabeling my own experience for quite some time... I also think that there are reasonable ways to be treated - and unreasonable ways. I completely agree and admire your committment to your son; keeping things together for his sake has alot of value. Even so, there must be some "limit" to the BS you should have to endure. I know it is really complicated, but it is like when my son when through an angry period growing up, it was "okay to express it, but not okay to do XXX" sort of thing. Maybe that isn't possible with a person with such bad emotional /mental state but those were my thoughts. I don't always use the right words, no intention to be offensive or disrespectful to your wife.... I just know that i have to set limits of how people treat me or else I go back to those old BAD coping mecanisms.... they are pretty deeply ingrained. (I had a very abusive father and anxiety ridden mother and learned my numbing techniques as a child. I picked overeating and obesity to help me cope but didn't even know I had done that!)

Keep scars out of the sun for 2 years!!! Sunscreen plus clothing....your scars will be more noticeable if they get sun exposure. I am 2 years post plastics and my scars are not bad at all....

Whilst I get it, I think it gives too much credit to the speaker. Seriously. .. they see hot..they say "hot" I don't think it is more complicated than that.

Well, I don't track calories because it never really worked for me in the past. It showed i have a RMR of 1600 which I understand is what you burn if you sat on your butt and watched tv all day - ha. Since I would like to lose 10# to get under goal... and lets say I aim to average 1# a week and burn on average 300 calories a day exercising- according to calorie math I could accomplish that averaging 1400 calories a day. I suspect that while calorie math is bogus, that another part of the problem is that we might say we eat 1200 calories a day (mostly true) but the big splurge days up the average more than we think. My main goal is to reduce my body fat % and I thought that there is some sort of way to use this info to create calorie targets to support muscle development, not just weight loss.

Well, it kinda sucked what they said, but I imagine they intended it to be a compliment. I have to tell you a slightly funny "you look hot" story. i used to keep my horse at a barn and the vet that most of us there used is a really good looking, confirmed bachelor type. It is well known that the local horse women are always after him, but he is a good vet and I have no interest other than his knowledge - and he is a nice person too and we often talked about the science behind horse nutrtion and health etc which i found interesting. Anyway, right about the time I got to goal, we had a big holiday party at the barn. He hadn't seen me in about 6 months, walked in the door, and right there in front of EVERYONE exclaims "you're hot!". I must have turned 3 shades of red and everybody laughed and got in on the good natured joking. They were friends and aquantainces and it was certainly meant as a compliment, but it was a little embarrassing at the time!

Actually, the good news about hip replacements is they are generally less painful, quicker rehab and higher "success" rates than knees. Well, I suspect my knees will need bionic parts at some point, so maybe that ISN'T such good news for me, but you gotta take the bright spots where you can find them! Happy New Year everyone. I have been thinking alot about my goals for 2016, kind of exciting times.

Ever since my (former) primary care doctor suggested I just needed better cookbooks rather than weight loss surgery, nothing a physician says about obesity surprises me. Unless they are bariatric/metabolic experts they tend to be fairly clueless.

As a mental health professional, this might be obvious to you, but it was a real learning for me. I was in a long term live in relationship with a wonderful man for over a decade. We didn't fight, but neither of us was living the life we wanted, neighter in finding the intimacy, professional sucess or personal happiness. After losing weight I finally had the courage to force change which in the end... ended the relationship. This was a few years ago and we remain friends. What I didn't realize until being free of my obesity, and being more distant from him that we both suffered from quite severe anxiety. We had a codependant relationship in the sense that he often comforted my anxiety while he hid his. It was not good. So, your situation is different, but where I am going with this is sometimes having a chance to understand yourself better helps alot with coping with another. Due to our shared interests in my grown sons, family pets etc I still see my EX alot. I have managed to figure out how to do that without triggering our co-dependant anxiety dance. As a result, I am finally "unstuck" from alot of things in my life that I was going in circles on before. He seems alot better too, but true to pattern will never talk about it. I guess any of us with major food/bad lifestyle habits has SOME KIND of underlying issue that we are self medicating for. for me, getting to the root of "why" has helped me alot with successful maintanance.Years of counseling never got me to this because my anxiety was dulled/managed by my obesity, overeating and a partner who somehow kept me spinning in those same circles and thinking it was normal and rational when it wasn't. Highly functioning persons such as ourselves become masters at that and no counselor or doctor EVER mentioned anxiety as my underlying problem, because I don't have alot of the more obvious signs I guess. Anyway, with the theme of self care being very important I wonder if there is value in seeing yourself, your own issues with food and obesity for what it is... figuring out what YOU NEED to survive and thrive and then answering the question how do you continue living with a person you clearly love and value, but has significant mental health issues.

Every doc is different, but mine asked me to not engage in anything that would raise the heart rate - I don't recall the number of weeks - maybe it was 4? Then, I was very worried about scars and tugging on freshly healed skin. Finally, my lover thought I was made of glass during that recovery so... we just kissed for about the first 6 weeks post op. Once I was cleared to go to the gym, I figured I was good to go!

I didnt have it, but I am on my surgeons patient's Facebook page. I guess you already know that lipo is for many people the most painful procedure. Thighs are tough, I got the small lift which took care of the worst of if, but I thought about revision. It turns out that fat cells are prone to returning to thighs so surgeons said not likely worth it for me. It's ok, I will just never have a real thigh gap is all....

I didn't have liposuction but I hear that is very painful

I had similar struggles and it has taken time and getting my head screwed on straight to get past this. I was not used to looks of appreciation, or being asked to dance, or asked for my number and who knew th a that sort of thing would make me feel so "exposed". I recommend the tincture of time, reflection, combined with getting outside your own head and perhaps counseling. Good friends help alot too.

food wise, I don't really miss anything. I feel like I can eat whatever I want and for the m ost part I eat much better quality, high value food. What I sometimes miss is being numb...I don't seem to be able to evade and avoid the world like I used to. This is less about food and more about the fatsuit - I didn't realize the many hidden purposes it served until it was gone gone gone. What I DON'T miss - pretty much summed up as "sitting on the sidelines of life". I go shopping with th trim pretty girls, I take on new hobbies without fear of being foolish and too fat (kayaking, snowshoeing, hiking), i look no more ridiculous than anyone else on the dance floor, I can "run up the stairs" without fear of heart attack, I can walk across a crowded room and not wonder how people are looking me/judging my size ..Haha. I can go on and on....but being at maintenance for a few years now I realize this whole slice of life that I only partially participated in before. I guess I told myself I didnt care about such superficial fluff, but now that I have it, I realize what a liar I was. Honestly I would have told you (and people told me this!!) That I didnt let the excess weight keep me from living a full life. I call shenanigans!! I DON'T miss being in denial about what living a full life means.

@ I missed your original post so can only guess what you shared, but I am sentimental and even relationships I want to end are terribly difficult for me. I think for me some of it is just my inherent personality...I feel deeply and once I feel a bond to a person, animal or situation...leaving it is hard. Good luck to you.

I am 51 and lost 150#, people tell me my before pix look like mother to my current pix. Look at my profile. I am going to get fat transfer as I have lost upper cheek fullness.

Slimfast is horrid in my opinion. Premier protein is an example of low carb low sugar, high protein.

Just a thought....an addict in the middle of their own addiction can't imagine you would enjoy holidays and birthdays without crappy food....because their world is focused on it. I like good food as much as the next person, but I don't equate food with happiness.....and it sounds like they do. You can't win arguments with illogical people....just let it go, do what you do, they are gonna do what they do and you decide how much crap you are willing to take. This battle is seldom won with arguing back because they are clueless and simply have no empathy and understanding of your point of view.

I forgot to mention, 2015 is the year I hosted 3 big parties. I used to love hosting and it felt good to restart that!

I felt like crud for many weeks post op, normal. Dehydration, even mild makes you feel really bad so focus on hydration and give yourself time to heal.

I should start what exactly?

I did not do too well with the band but have been maintaining 150# loss post revision to sleeve in Dec 2011. Not going to claim it has been easy, but sleeve has helped make it possible.

I like the positive message of the 1%, but I guess I need to think a bit more about how directly it applies to maintaining massive weight loss. I hit goal in Feb 2013 and weighed that exact weight Christmas morning 2015. I lost more than half my body weight and so far keeping it off and good health is a central focus of my lifestyle . I am far far from perfect but I feel like I had to change WAY more than 1%. I am not talking about just food and exercise either...