CowgirlJane

This photos is me after losing about 155 since VSG and more like 180+ from my all time high. No spanx, and this was pre-plastics. I have a bit of a melted snowman look, but, look WAY better than I did at 300+!! Do not fear excess skin - get the weight lost!

I could work in the office everyday but I don't work WITH anybody there and being on the phone all day bothers my cubefarm neighbors. I lead virtual teams who sit mostly in either Boston or Atlanta. I would consider moving to Atlanta, but not Boston. I don't know if I will sell my house, but I am overwhelmed by living in a 2000 sq foot house on 2 acres all by myself. i can't keep up... my son is home in June and I am going to hire him to help me get things caught up. My goal is to have it ready to sell by spring of 2015 but I am not sure I will actually do that. I love the country, but I am lonely and overwhelmed so I need to seriously reconsider. I mentioned my ideas of early retirement... well... I can retire comfortably by 55 if I do some smart things. One of them would be to start living somewhere cheaper and due to the nature of my job, I have that freedom and could start out renting... doing a cheaper lifestyle even while working. No big decisions are allowed in 2014 - I have had more change than I can handle... but i am thinking.... I can visualize renting a little apartment somewhere cool and boarding my horse at a barn and living an easier life than the one I have now. If I found a cool place away from the expensive urban area I am in now, I could really meet those financial goals too. Considering crazy ideas right now... Vegas or Phoenix and then come back to Seattle for the summers. I don't know, all just ideas right now.

I think you got some great replies so I am bringing up a couple of other thoughts.... I am lets see now....28 months out. When I had my one year post op, my surgeon told me that year 2-3 were just as important as year one ... because 2-3 is when regain can begin. It was a good thought he planted because basically I just kept doing what I had been doing. I lost another 20 or so pounds but mot importantly, didn't start a regain trend. I think that it is very hard to accept the truth - we will always have the "obesity disease" and need to manage diet and exercise just like we did that first year - assertively. another thought - could you be suffering from anxiety/depression generally and it has manifested itself by being anxious about the scale and weight? Finally, I feel like I could eat alot at once, and that I could eat all day. I am guessing a sizeable number of us would same the same - I could eat alot, I just don't. The main techniques that support me in that are: 1. drinking enough fluids to stay hydrated 2. base my entire diet around dense Protein and veggies and have some sort of vague plan (for some a rigid plan works, but I do good with a vague plan) 3. minimize sliders (some healthy foods are sliders for me - meaning I can and will overeat on them) 4. find an accountability path that works (for me it is weighing regularly but for others it is daily tracking of food - that gives me anxiety whereas the scale does not - funny huh?). Another accountability factor for me is non-stretch pants. They get tight - too bad I don't get to buy new ones, I get to lose those couple of pounds again. 5. Keep coming back for support. Don't let little baubles turn into big "derailments". I remember one time thinking that gaining 10 pounds was the same as gaining 100 - the most ridiculous remark ever, but I actually felt that way. Be aware of your own destructive thoughts and tendencies and use support teams to help you get through it and change that wrong thinking. 6. Stay active - it feels good! 7. Try to be thankful and appreciative of how far you have come. It is painful for me to look at, but every day I look at some before and after photos of myself.... it reminds me that I am a wild success story and you are too!

151 this morning - holding steady! I have not been fasting and I have been "depressed" so I am pretty pleased to be hanging on to a good weight. I have decided to go on antidepressants since starting about Monday I have been hit with what really feels like depression. I mean, this is more than feeling little bouts of anxiety or blues. I am also going to increase my counseling even thought i am not a big believer in it... I need to do SOMETHING different. I had a long phone call with the counselor I see (she is psychologist + ARNP so can manage meds too) yesterday and her words were helpful. She thinks that whatever it is that made it possible for me to live for 15 years with someone who showed me so little affection and ... well... it's a long story... but that same determined will is perhaps why i didn't experience the loss of food during the weight loss phase but am going through it now. I have no desire to binge, food gives me no special pleasure. I think I have found substitutes - staying active, friends, exercise, horses etc but there is clearly a degree of emotional upset that I am going through beyond anything I experienced during the weight loss phase or even most of maintenance. I am sure it is weight loss related, but i am kinda with swizz that it is more of a mid life crisis thing. Anyway, haven't even started meds, but i feel better already. Work is going pretty good but my world is just too isolated. I live in the country... alone. I work from home 99% of the time... on the phone, but basically alone. I used to go out alot - whether it was dating or going to meetup events or even just meeting friends or going shopping solo. I have either stopped or do the bare minimum of all that so I am too isolated. As the extroverted Gemini that i am, it is making me feel lonely! How is everyone doing? Spring is in the air, in theory this should be a good time of year to be getting fitter, eating fresh foods and all that good stuff!

Spanx hides everything... well, almost! do not let fear of excess skin slow you down on improving your health!!!

Found out i have pretty significant arthritic changes in my hip. Injection today and next is physical therapy. I am pretty blue about it. It's funny, I accepted excess skin as part of the price I had to pay for the decades of obesity. I was prepared to live with it even if I couldn't have plastics. Somehow, all this joint damage (on top of two knees with no cartledge left) is just a reminder of how much I have hurt myself being so fat for so long. I will get over my pity party soon, but for right now I am grieving for the things I have lost to obesity. It is funny that I never went through these emotions while losing weight. ... I think it is just that i look so freaking normal now that sometimes I believe that I am... but it is an illusion. Doesn't matter how good you look, underneath the hood is still someone at least somewhat disabled... and my future life continues to be impacted by obesity.

I am not a big fan of obesity help and don't post there - but for the DS, that is where the action seems to be! Hope you find good advice and success!

A slider by definition is any food that you can eat too much of.. that does not give you a feeling of satiety. Many protein bars fall into that catagory. If you can eat 2-3 a day that is too many unless you are some kinda mega athlete climbing Mt Everest or something. But, that isn't what the vets forum is for - it is for veterans one or more year out to discuss topics unique to this phase in the journey. Many of us do post in other areas, but this is the ONE place on this website dedicated to people who want support in the later phases of the journey - please respect the rules that are posted at the top of this forum. I am not trying to be mean or unkind or unsupportive - it is just that vets just plain leave and don't hang around to give input to others if they don't have a place where they too can find support. Cut and pasted from the top of this forum: This forum is dedicated to veteran Sleevers who are one year or more post-op to discuss issues specific to those who are further along in their journey. Please note: You must be one year out to post or create topics here.

This is the vets forum and topic BUT I must say that it took awhile for the hunger reduction. At 4 weeks you are still on soft or mushy foods and nerve damage isn't healed yet. I think it takes till 6 weeks or MORE before things start feeling like they should. Also if you are not on a ppi for acid cont8...start now. That often feels like hunger and most everyone benefits from it in the early months. Our bodies still make acid for a full size tummy...

My advice.. ditch protein bars! They are sliders and also tend to be high carb. I am 28 months post op and eating low carb is the only thing that works for me to control hunger and cravings.

On the band to sleeve forum people talk of bad gas bloating, no feeling of restriction and urgent bowel even a year post op. I do get diarrhea from a protein drink and have to give it a rest for awhile but otherwise don't experience these things. .do you?

I got sick of sleep studies. I learned how to adjust...Google it! Basically it's the balance tween snoring and blowing your sinuses out. Haha. I suggest he goes up a few notches. Get a proper mask that Fits!

There are online places that tell you how to adjust the levels...I had a resmed I gave to my son. Google it. You can buy a new mask online without a prescription.

I sent you an email but no reply yet ...

Be careful. Nerves are cut.. I don't trust how it feels until 6 weeks post op.

I agree with the basic theme that we should be here to support not bash each other. I in no way troll on any other forums with any intention of causing someone any distress. The way it is laid out, sometimes I have accidently posted on a forum I didn't realize was in the bypass or lapband area, but i have gotten smarter about it over time. I think we all have the right to make our own choice of WLS, what we think best suits us and our lifestyle... and hopefully based on some sort of surgeon recommendation. Once somebody has had surgery, it is absolutely pointless to be negative about their surgery. At that point, it is about supporting each other to be as successful as we can. What I have a problem with is the idea that it should be all candy and roses... when people are preops and they are asking for people's experiences I feel it is the right thing to honestly share my personal experience. I am a revision from the band to sleeve after 10 years of "failure" with the band. One of the disappointments i had in my banded days was that the online support group I was a part of hid the vets forum from preops and recently banded. It wasn't until I was a year out that I realized how many people had the same struggles i did. After a decade, most (but not all!) fellow bandsters had either revised or had their bands removed. In fact, i have in my paperwork info from bioenterics that the band was intended to be temporary and would likely need to be removed. That is my personal experience and maybe it is based on how they used to do bands (I was banded in 2001) but it is what happened. I wish i had really understood the implications of all that before i was banded, but i didn't. I think it is a big mistake to not let people hear people's experiences - positive and negative. BTW, there are aspects of being sleeved that are negative too, and I am forthright about that as well. Like, I have a dairy intolerance that has pretty much killed my ability to eat ice cream (okay, that is probably a good thing - ha!). I like that the veteran's forum here is available for all to read, there is much to learn from people who are years (or a decade) into a procedure. Congratulations to all of us who are working to improve our health through maintaining a healthy weight loss... no matter the means!

I would do a search on realself.com - look at before and after photos and read reviews. My advice as someone who lost a lot of weight and had plastics - don't worry about it just yet. Stay focused on getting healthy now. When you get to goal, you can do some free consults to give you an idea of what they recommend. good luck!

2 plus years out I can tolerate anything really but I have become at least somewhat lactose intolerant. What that means as a practical matter is that ice cream is off the menu. I never have been able to abide by Chinese restaurant food because of the MSG and who knows what else (no problem with Thai, Indian etc)

millergirl, PSSC has support groups in several locations for their patients. I think Edmonds, Fife, Marysville and Bellingham. I don't go to them because i am apparently not a support group kinda gal....haha. you should check them out. You should join their facebook group too if you haven't already.

I wandered off my own topic... My point is that goal is just a number, it is so arbitrary. I claim I got to goal in Feb 2013 because I liked the sound of a nice round 150# weight loss. I fit size 8 pants; sounded great to me after being a 3X. I have lost more since and truth be told I would like to end 2014 solidly in the mid 140s rather than solid 150. I think I see goal as more of a fluid destination.... more part of the process. You know skinny people see their weight that way too. Like, they have a number or size in mind, but it isn't seen as the "end" of a journey. It's more of a place you are at.

sarsar, I too went through menopause very young and it made me feel sad. Hard to explain. Now I love that I am done with it except I hate that every damn issue I have is now blamed on hormones (used to be blamed on my fat). I don't get constipated anymore, in fact sometimes have the opposite problem. I go through periods were I cannot tolerate protein drinks (just entered one)without diarrea so I have to stop drinking them for a month or two and then can start up again. anyway, I eat veggies at least 3X a day. My typical breakfast omelette is loaded with veggies (and a protein source and uses egg beaters and a bit of cheese). I spread that over breakfast and either a mid morning snack or lunch. If I make a separate lunch it is frequently a salad with protein on it (like a salmon burger or sliced turkey or shrimp or something). Dinner is often just meat but I try to have some carrot stix or more salad or something veggie like. Maybe I use lettuce leaves instead of bread to make a "wrap" of some sort. Or I put coleslaw in something that resemembles a fish taco. I think that helps me alot with being regular. I have reflected alot on "making it to goal". I got another PM yesterday from somebody who feels like a failure since she hasn't lost much since her band to sleeve revision. She wants to know how she can emulate my success. I was feeling sorry for her till I read her stats... she revised at a weight similiar to my goal weight - she was in the 160s and my original goal was 158. So, how do I kindly say.... "and what the hell did you expect? To lose 160 pounds when you only weigh 160???" That wouldn't be nice so I am letting it lay until I feel less snarky. My friend M just found out that a level 3 sex offender just moved in next door to her. She told me (and only half kidding) "my gun is loaded, hope he shows up because i am in a very bad mood". That is a little how I feel. Don't worry... no loaded guns.... just a loaded tongue.

Denise - you don't look fat, you look great - don't apologize! My problem isn't lack of activities. I stay busy, have lots of friends, have more hobby opportunities than i can squeeze in... I have the ways and means to travel. If I set my mind to it, I could even find buddies to do all that travel with. It is more of a mindset. A big part of what happened this week was the discussion with the counselor brought up some painful feelings. You know, I was always the cheery optimist - funny smart fat girl. Maybe I just need more time not playing a role or being something other people think I need to be. You know I only just recently told most of my family about my split up. I just don't have it in me anymore to deal with other people's emotions. Counselor and I talked about even finding new (not replacement, but additional) friends who are in a better state in life as I am feeling the weight of so many people I know dealing with just uglies in life.

I was banded in 2001 at 272. Lost to about 205 in a year. Had issues. ..unfilled by 2003 By 2005...All time high 332. Band removed and revised to sleeve in Dec 2011 at 308; lost 150 over 14 months. Now maintaining in the 150 ballpark...total loss 160. So for me the sleeve has worked alot better.

Since I did a lot of first dates, one thing that drives me crazy and that I know men HATE is people lying about their weight and posting photos that either hide it or are out of date. BTW, men do the same thing but they lie more about their height, age and then weight/physical shape. I was never rude to anyone, but it shocked me to meet someone who was so clearly nowhere near what they advertised. So, while that guy was a jerk about this ladies weight, I also empathize with just being sick of the lies and misrepresentations... like didn't they think I would notice that he is 5'3", bald and gasps for air walking down the sidewalk? Anyway, I also don't know how anyone can think they are in love or in a relationship with someone they never met. I guess I am an odd duck, but I am slow to love people... quick to like... slow to love. Love comes way after the initial attraction and excitement for me. There is that whole chemistry thing too... have no idea how you can know that if you haven't met.

So, I am hanging out in the 150-151 range lately without fasting. My version of fasting has been to have low carb days... really low carb... alternating with my moderate carb days. I would like to get to 145 but I have to admit I am worried about my sadness level the last few days more than my weight. Counselor i see really thinks that letting my blood sugar drop is contributing to the problem... I don't know. Today I didn't even want to eat but had lunch because she told me I should. Why am I so funked? Well, there have been a couple of triggers - like just **** happening all around me that I find unbearable at times. Every time i see or talk to my ex I go into a tailspin. Mostly, I think it gets back to the midlife crisis stuff that swizz talks about. Dang it... I have been talking to like a half dozen good friends to discover I have about the happiest life of all of them... maybe this is really as good as it gets. That my friends is a sad realization. I will get over it, but am wallowing at the moment. I am still practicing my positive writing and remembering to be grateful. I have been the queen of grateful my whole life and I guess maybe it's a little busted right now. Sarsar, I did like 4-5 consults and my questions became refined as I progressed through them. I needed to see like a zillion before and afters because I started to understand the "cherry picking" process. My favorite local doc had a bunch out on real self AND must have had 20 photo albums covering decades of surgery. She even explained how her technique evolved - I really liked her alot. Also, to have them really explain what the recommend in terms of phasing.. and why. Make sure they have done a goodly number with photos of massive weight loss patients. It is very misleading to look at photos of a tummy tuck of or mommy makeover for someone who had a kid or two and wants to look 25 again. Seriously, massive weight loss is a whole different kettle of fish. Ask about where the surgery is done (surgical center or hospital). Talk about how complications might be handled. Ask about complication insurance. Discuss after care. I have alot of issues with naseua and anethesia so I had alot of questions around that. Length of surgery. What they recommend for your breasts and why. The Seattle female doc I almost went to gave me the best advice on breasts and it guided my choice. I am SO HAPPY I listened to her and not all the online DDD people who think we all need huge boobs...LOL. I am so happy being a shapely C cup and I have received very positive feedback from the males around so I don't think I went to small and I can still button a jacket. I was so terror struck at the idea of plastics, i don't even remember everything now... the initial consults really bummed me out, but i got desensitized. Plastics is about tradeoffs and it is something of an art I think... so understanding that surgeons asthetics is really important. If you are getting a lower body lift you really do risk a bit of a boy figure... watch their before and afters for that issue. Arm lifts - man, look at those afters to see the scar placement. Ask them about scar placement for arms. Ask how they will do the breat lift. My boobs were small and perky enough that he didn't have to do the T cut underneath so I basically have no breast scars - I love that.