CowgirlJane

Someone who was very close to me for many years, is my same age (we celebrated our bog 4-0 together 10 years ago!) is laying near death in a skilled nursing facility. It has been sad and shocking for someone so young to be taken by brain cancer. I was up visiting on Saturday even though she is no longer aware of our presence. I was walking down the hall at this nursing home and a woman in a wheelchair who looked to be at least in her 90s spoke to me in a clear and strong voice ... "what color is your hair?" Me: "Brown" Grand Lady: "I see auburn too" Me: "Yes, I have some red in it too. " Grand Lady: "You should thank God you are so beautiful and have such lovely hair" I was stunned. While I realize that she probably has dementia and likely has this same conversation with every woman that walks down the hall, it actually was a very wise remark and gave me pause... a reason to stop and ask myself if I am remembering to be grateful. I was reminded to thank God daily for everything I have - not really just appearances but everything. I get to go out and enjoy life. I can run, jump, breath, laugh, hike up a mountain, go dancing, go out and play with my friends, ride my horse on a beautiful day. Enjoy life and remember to give thanks. I was able to do some of these things as a super morbidly obese person, but it is ingrained in my life now... and that is a good thing.

5:2 has lots written on it. It wasn't originally a weight loss thing at all but rather a technique to extend life I would not do it during weight loss phase. I really think there are other tools more suitable for that first year or two post op. I have done it on and off since last summer and it works great. I have not discussed with a NUT as this falls outside of their area frankly. Google the studies on it for info.

beautiful!!

I didn't read all the replies, but I wanted to share soomething with you. I am 8 months out from plastics and I almost didn't get the arms done because of the "scars". I am lucky that they are hidden when my arms are in a normal position, but still, scars. Well, they have faded, ALOT. They are a thin line, although some sections are still red. Even so, wow, what a difference. Whether sleeveless or not, my whole profile changed and the excess skin removal from the arm completely moved me from looking sorta... frumpy... to looking trim and atheletic. You might be in a bit of post surgery depression. Plastics are TOUGH, no joke, hard to recover from. Wears you out, makes you tired, is emotional, filled with doubts and all that... but it passes. I am so thrilled with my results - I don't even see my scars anymore. Everyonece in awhile somebody notices them and can be a little shocked. And I will have to say... yeah, I do look like I had pretty big surgery.... I just don't even see it anymore. I love my results, scars and all.... and I bet you will too. Hang in there - this whole journey ain't for wimps that is for sure! I added a picture from this weekend. For anyone who every weighed like the size of two grown men... and now is something like a "normal" weight realizes that I had ALOT of extra arm skin. I do have scars, but, look at those arms. Makes me feel so happy to look normal and hardly anybody notices those scars anyway!

On a slightly related topic - I do not understand why so many people (thi s is posted about ALOT on the forums so it is common) suddenly turn judgemental toward heavy people. That hasn't happened to me. I don't feel I need to rescue them- because I know we can only save ourselves, I don't feel disgusted by them or judgemental. It is like anyone else - a person walking with a limp, a person who is vision impaired, a person who seriously needs a better haircut..haha.. I might notice it, but the thought never occurs to me that it is really my business. I completely respect that the original poster is recognizing this is not ideal behavior and trying to change it - I appluad that. What I don't understand is why this is so common? My only theory is that there is a pshcological protection - like if I can declare that it is "someone else" that has this huge issue then feel safer from it? for me, even though I see myself as trim/normal weight, I still know that have the disease of obesity and I could "look" like that again very very easily. No judgement of others since I am too busy slaying my own dragons...haha.

I think you are very brave to have posted this. There is a difference between confidence, asserting yourself, standing up for yourself and being mean. I wonder (just a guess) if you are struggling with finding that balance? Alot changes when you lose massive weight and while it is awesome to get healthier, alot of these changes aren't so easy to deal with. What I will say is that getting the emotional side "handled" is probably a key thing for long term maintenance. If you can't live at peace with yourself, with people you care about, you might start using food again to "regulate moods" No judgement from me, here I am - will be 3 years out in December and I feel like I am finally "leveling out" and no longer vascilating between low confidence/uncomfortable in my skin and feelings of high emotions. It takes time, and often times help and advice from a great counselor or advisor. Good luck!

It is tough. I think you are wise to seek therapy because I feel so HAPPY to be enjoying my slimmer, healthier body. I want that for everyone. I have my struggles too - don't get me wrong - but the dismorphia I have seemed to have beaten into submission. Good riddance!

Sorry my pics were messed up. Posting from my phone or kindle and it just kept saying it was failing... argg. Okay, anybody looking for a little drama for entertainment? You really miss the whole story though if you don't get the nasty private messages from the OP. she apparently has ripped pretty much everyone a new one if they don't fall in line with her... or dare challenge her in anyway. What a weirdo, but an entertaining one. I admit my original post was short and perhaps a bit terse but you would have thought i had murdered someone from the tone of the PM she sent me. And, I bite my tongue and don't ask the obvious question -- you had WLS and you only have 50# to lose? Do you have any idea the long term risk you have just taken on woman? http://www.gastricsleeve.com/forum/questions-and-answers-for-those-considering-a-gastric-sleeve/51229-why-such-high-goal-weights-2.html#post463038 So, I have been having too much fun lately... scale popped up 5# this morning. oops. Time to buckle down a bit. And stop going to soo many wine events. I have one more on Thursday.... argghhh

Wow, incredible pictures Sarah! Lovely family. Denise do not write back or respond...it sends mixed signals.just by responding you give him something to grab hold of. He really seems needy.

Okay I am finally once and for all done with the boyfriend I had for over a year. It essentially ended back in early April though we sorta tried one last time to have a relationship closer to what I wanted and it was an epic fail. I am ok, it was a good situation for a long time but now I am finally open to a good relationship. I saw someone for a few weeks in June/early July but ended it when his true colors started showing. Recently, I met someone I really like and who seems to like me. We have only had 2 dates but they were both great. Our first meeting was like 5-6 hours and out second date involved a hike and 2 meals....more like 12 hours! He is attractive, active and I am very interested in him. So i haven't really dated that much...and right now I feel that sense of "don't blow it" while we are in very early stages. I know men like to pursue so I am going easy with contact. We already have plans for Saturday... which will be another all day thing. Question for you ladies. ..While I am always true to being the real me I also want to keep his interest in these early weeks. I need flirting and other tips as I just don't really know how to do this very well. so bring on the tips!

Woo woo and miss mac...you both made me laugh so hard .. I nearly shot wine out my nose...haha

I will write more later...but I am fine. Betty is pain free and having a peaceful passing. I have seen he'll on earth..and as a way to die, hers ain't so bad

Spent yesterday with Betty. She no longer awakens. When she stirs it means pain and morphine is given. It won't be long now. I cried my eyes out lster, she is just 50. I found a photo of a birthday cake the year we turned 40 together. Cake had our names on it together. My kiddo and I went to a blues music festival where we met some of my friends and acquaintances. My friends boyfriend taught me some basic couples dance steps...fun!

I post on another sleeve forum where I have really pissed off someone. She is one of those that her starting weight is the same as many people's goal weight. She referred to weighing in the 180s as "gross" and couldn't understand why people s goal weights are so high and I called her on it publicly so she sent me a very nasty PM over it. So I found it a bit funny but also realized she is full of assumptions that are incorrect. My first inclination was to just delete it my second was to actually explain to her how terribly beat down super morbidly obese people are and reading her judgemental tone .. Well set me off. Actually I realize that I sort of have an issue with people who get sleeved to lose relatively small amount of weight. It doesn't seem like the right use of the surgery. There is another post of someone who has lost 30of the 40# she needs to lose. Since she didn't follow doc instructions she has no idea how to lose the last 10. Since it's none of my business who gets surgery I don't comment on that angle but admit I am biased and more likely to be annoyed at that. The image in my head is some skinny woman walking into Lane Bryant and saying in a disgusted voice "I can't believe how HUGE these clothes are! These people are just gross."

Well going back to your nutrionalist or surgeon might be good to get support and guidance. Myfitnesspal is an awesome tracking tool for food and activity. The key is to go back to the basics of eating to lose weight. Are you saying you don't know what those basics are?

Thing again. I theorize it is because I am thin now. When I was fat people thought it was good I didn't eat much. Now that everybody thinks I am thin, my small portions are gathering unwanted attention and i don't like it. Maybe this belongs in the rant section, but I really really really wonder why it is people even CARE what I am eating? My BMI is still in the 23 range so it's not like I am skin and bones either. I have not been feeling 100% lately and eating greasy fried food doesn't sit well. So last night I was at a tavern and could not imagine a burger and fries so I ordered veggies with hummous. You would have thought I ordered a side of birdseed to eat based on the reaction I got ...grrr Yes, I am socializing more with people who didn't know me as obese and don't know about my surgery... but still... Okay, rant over.

Love it when an old thread is revived. This was 3 month ago. .. I still say...leave me alone. . My body! My bmi remains at 23... I pray that I make this same claim many years from now. But for now.. I cling tenaciously to a "normal" weight. I know I have sisters of the same family. ..The people with the disease of obesity with symptoms currently under control.

I have suggestions but low on time right now so just sharing first idea. Did I understand that you only followed the eating plan for one month? How close to goal are you? My first suggestion is to do a big reset. Eat super clean for a week...endure the hunger temporarily because it will pay off. The simple way is to do a liquid diet (Protein shakes) for a week to "reset" things. Avoid Protein Bars and any high carb processed food during that week. Google pouch test for different approaches but the point is to sort of start over and help get the feeling of restriction back.

Had a nice time Friday. Some aspects of incompatibility revealed themselves. I am still going to see him as they aren't showstoppers but I think I should keep it light,not serious for awhile and casually date others while we figure out if this can really go anywhere. Sigh.

If a person has never been obese they just have no way of knowing that the body is changed by obesity and it is very hard to maintain any kind of weight loss without surgery. Her body works normally so if she gains a couple of pounds she cuts back until it's gone. It's like telling a diabetic, just produce the right amount of insulin at the right time will ya!?!

Well it is not logical to think that if you have only 50# to lose that you will lose 50# as fast as someone who has 150# to lose. You are likely to get to goal faster but not likely to noise 50# as fast. Consider yourself lucky, after I lost 50# I still had 110# to go.

Hello, I am 2.5years out and actually don't care that much about food these days. I do alot of salad with Protein, omelettes with veggies and protein etc etc. I don't know what you mean about a side of slime. I don't eat that. I do eat salmon, chicken, other fish, beef etc. My favorite meals are cooked in nice restaurants.

You are fortunate to have a man who is crazy about you just the way you are. Although it didn't work out long term, I saw someone for about a year who helped me see myself through more realistic eyes. And taught me alot of self confidence in my looks and body. Listen to him not your inner critical voice.

You are so young! My revision to the sleeve was life changing, life saving and I am a huge advocate. ..however. .you need to be ready. Really really ready. I will truly admit that I was a young mother at your age and not sure I could have applied myself to lasting success given my career, husband and babies. It is permanent and a big decision. I am not trying to talk you out of it just suggesting you listen to your inner voice too. Does your insurance cover counseling? How about a session or two with someone who specializes in WLS patients to discuss your delimna?

Jess. ..not upset with you. ..no harm no foul...I just feel adamant about the point since I know others -pre ops in particular read these kind of threads is all .