CowgirlJane

@@Crochet Queen I think you might be interested in this topic. Sent from my KFJWI using the BariatricPal App

There is another very active thread on this topic. Try searching. Sent from my KFJWI using the BariatricPal App

This is very timely subject for me as I am dating again. I am a very self confident woman, I shop alone, travel alone, even use public restrooms alone, but there are situations that trigger fear - and they all involve being"noticed" by men. You can probably guess there was an incident in my youth that is likely a contributing factor. Yesterday I was at the mall - I exited the store and a man was watching me intently.his eyes following me. My brain told me it was harmless, a compliment really but I could feel the uncomfortable feelings stir -I wiped that smile off my face, avoid eye contact at all costs and got the hell outta there. My heart rate probably didn't slow down for 3-5 minutes even though I was perfectly safe from a rational perspective. I tried meeting men via meetup activities. I had it happen a few times when several men were chatting me up, wanting to dance etc. -and it was uncomfortable. It was like my brain went on overload...too much attention, too intense even though rationally they didn't do anything wrong. I would tend to flee.. honestly I sucked at that whole thing and I know it's my fault not anybody else behaving badly. (Although I experienced the bad behavior too) It ocucurred to me recently that I am so liking the man I am dating right now alot, for many reasons but a huge contributor is that I feel so safe with him. His first career was as a cop and then detective and I feel like he is very good at reading people and communicating both verbally and non verbally. He communicates, especially non verbally, that he wants me around but there is never any pressure. It makes me want him all the more. In addition, I feel safe talking to him because we have established that we can have opposing views on a subject and he isn't even slightly irrate. I feel respected and listened to. Maybe not all women are like this, but I am drawn to a man who gently lures me in by his subtle charms vs one who paws me or makes uncomfortable innuendos. A man explained that to me once from his perspective...that it is much better to flirt, but let the woman set the pace...for the same reasons you talked about. I don't know where he learned it, but quite the ladys man he was. On the physical reassurances topic - I think this book is spot on. I love to be hugged and petted by someone I care about and who cares for me. I always thought it triggered endorphins, but the author has sound reasoning. It also makes me feel safe and that good feeling can last for days. This sounds like a book I should look for and share with my sons.

@@Georgia my mother became more fearful with age too. For me, I have tried a couple of times to ride on the back of a harley. First time, I actually relaxed into it as my driver was very sympathatic to my anxiety and explained things to me in a way that my rational brain could accept as clear info. His bike was also really comfy with the princess seat. The second time was with a guy I did a few dates with. I was miserable. The bike was smaller, although still a Harley, seat was uncomfortable and the position hurt my hip. On top of that, he would do a ton of swerving and I even felt a little motion sickness. I NEVER want to ride one again because of that experience. It was anxiety provoking.... However, I know alot of people feel anxious about horseback riding. That is a very dangerous activity - especially the cliffhanger mountain rides and I dont feel the least bit worried. I just hope if I wreck I am either 1) fine or 2) dead. My biggest fear is of a head injury and become disabled... yes I wear a helmet, but that is a long way to fall especially off the side of a ravine - should that happen! But, I don't think about it. As Tim McGraw sings: "we ride and never think about the fall, I guess that's just the cowboy in us all" (of course he was talking about taking a risk on love) I can't do that on a motorcycle - my anxiety kicks in and I imagine everything - in particular the bike going down. Damn, I have been eating crappy about the last week - time to hit the reset button AGAIN!

When I had the kidney stone initial attack, dilaudid didn't touch the pain. The second dose knocked me out, but as soon as I'd rouse, the pain was there. Again, plastics aren't even in the same pain class - try to think positively as it may not be as bad as you think. I went to Mexico where Dr Sauceda keeps you in clinic for 3 days and then when released to hotel you use tramadol which is not very strong. I think that the pain is so well controlled the first few days that it just is minor discomfort after that. I do understand about being scared - I fainted during the presurgery prep! Good luck!!

I have a sweet female 4 year old, 7# purebred papillion. I am going to meet a rescue 4 month old yorkie mix.. She looks very Yorkie and her cross isn't known. I have lots of rescue experience but no experience with yorkies. Can someone tell me what they tend to be like? My pap is energetic,sweet and friendly but is bonded to me like glue. She is a cuddler and all around good girl. She hikes up tall mountains and runs circles around bigger dogs, paps are quite athletic and often used in agility. My girl has 2 jobs - looking cute and delivering snuggles and kisses. Sent from my KFJWI using the BariatricPal App

Is this the same as the POSE procedure? Good luck and wishing you great success. Sent from my KFJWI using the BariatricPal App

I lost 150# in 14 months. However my losses slowed to a crawl after losing the first about 110-120. I had to push hard! I went really low carb and switch to high intensity interval training. I have been maintaining fine (hit goal Feb 2013) but had to get a little radical to get the losses. Sent from my SAMSUNG-SGH-I337 using the BariatricPal App

Welcome! I am 4 years post sleeve and maintaining at about half my former size! Even after all this time food calls my name, but I have learned to coexist in a relatively comfortable space. Sent from my SAMSUNG-SGH-I337 using the BariatricPal App

Oh his gambling is under control and I have gone (but don't gamble) it's no problem except for the committed relationship possibility. It's a show stopper on that front but I enjoy him immensely. ..he is that right mix of attentive without smothering, good looking hot kisser...all good. I love my home in the country in summer months so want him to be comfortable here...but it's a plunge for me because I have kept dates separate from my family and not doing it this time. I am going to invite him on a hike with my brother soon.... Sent from my SAMSUNG-SGH-I337 using the BariatricPal App

Oh good grief...I am either in or out? Sent from my SAMSUNG-SGH-I337 using the BariatricPal App

I must be crazy. Michael introduced me to some of his friends. ..and while he has been patient, wanted to start meeting my people. I hosted a bbq Sunday - just my boys and a gfriend and my animal menagerie. It went great but it's really weird for me as I am pretty self protective...dates don't meet my kids/ come to my house. Michael was comfortable social able and ad my girlfriend said "hot" - he is 61 but honestly looks better than most 51 year olds. I like Michael a lot, wish he didn't gamble so much as that is a big issue for a permanent relationship. Not a problem for a summer boyfriend. About damn time I found a fun fit attractive tall guy to enjoy! And, he is teaching me to golf! Sent from my SAMSUNG-SGH-I337 using the BariatricPal App

Kim was the motorcycle triggering anxiety? They sure do in me! Sent from my SAMSUNG-SGH-I337 using the BariatricPal App

Which do you follow Ann? Sent from my SAMSUNG-SGH-I337 using the BariatricPal App

I liked my recliner/zero gravity chair post lower body lift. If you are in bed...pillows help to semi recline. I did not experience much pain at all, but I was admittedly in the clinic and well medicated the first 3 days post op. If it's any consolation, both my recent kidney stone and the wound complication(thigh!) I experienced this year were WAY more painful than the lower body lift from 2013. I did spend alot of time walking slowly like a 95 year old arthritic woman (those were doctors orders!) Took awhile before I was standing straight! Good luck and remember it will be so worth it and the discomfort will soon be q distant memory.

Clearly #3. I don't abstain from anything and I don't track, but I definately have a mental checklist, an internal guidance on my eating habits. I also rely on portion control because I have been known to eat healthy foods and still be fat....

I think you need hugs more than ass-kicking. I am sorry, it is devastating to lose beloved pets.

Is it worse when you first get up? Plantar fasciitis is terribly painful but can be treated. Mine is gone. Burning might be neuropathy....can you describe it a bit more? Either condition warrants a doc visit. Sent from my KFJWI using the BariatricPal App

I completely agree with the original poster - she should be upset her medical stuff was faxed like that!!! ALL medical things are private and we get to choose if and whom to tell. I apologize for the completely ridiculous allegations that you are a thief and don't have a right to privacy - it is NOT representative of the bariatric pal community so I hope you don't let it keep you from seeking support here. Sent from my KFJWI using the BariatricPal App

There are several on this forum in or near their 60s who had an actual sleeve. @@proudgrammy or@vsgann2012 might have some info to share. I don't understand why POSE is less risky on the anesthesia. Sleeve surgery is about 1-2 hours, right? Mine was under 2 hours and he was dealing with scar tissue from my band. Band was removed and scar tissue addressed 3months prior, but it is still trickier due to the damage done by the band. I would not do the POSE based on the success rates I have read so far. Yes, sleeve lacks the long term research that bypass has, but these new procedures come and go and I don't want to be a guinea pig. Sent from my KFJWI using the BariatricPal App

I am not a medical person so my opinion isn't that valid. I was indoctrinated on the old 100# or more overweight or else serious comorbidities. The medical professionals are doing WLS on smaller and smaller people all the time, presumably for medical reasons. I just have a hard time wrapping my mind around taking the risks, changing your body permantly for smaller amounts of excess weight. As was mentioned, you STILL have to change how you eat, your lifestyle or you will likely regain. The key thing for me is I was morbidly obese and just could not get the monkey off my back long enough to lose 150# without surgery. I never got and maintained below about 240# in the 2 decades pre sleeve and I am a 5'5" middle age woman. I now weigh in the 150s, 4years post sleeve.I wish I had been able to do this without surgery but I couldn't. Sent from my KFJWI using the BariatricPal App

When they calculate excess weight they don't necessarily use the same number as your goal. I have been maintaining at or under goal for a few years but I think it equates to about 95_98 percent of excesw weight. Do not be fooled by forums they are over represented in a few categories of people: -newbie -complications -people shouting their successes It is not the right way to assess complication rates OR statistical outcomes as it is self selected. Sent from my KFJWI using the BariatricPal App

It doesn't matter to me WHY but I know that after time, the restriction is less, h however it is very much influenced by how you eat and drink. B I do plan to discuss with my bariatric practice this year because I am curious. Statistically people do regain. I am 4 years out and a few pounds under goal. I weigh 15# more than my lowest weight. Back in 2014 when I got under goal so far I was quite aware it wasn't likely sustainable as it was not a comfortable weight for me. Sent from my KFJWI using the BariatricPal App

@@Inner Surfer Girl you continue to inspire me!

So I am giving a hallelujah for starting to get my life back. I am becoming active again...it's making me feel better. My puppy is adorbs....she and my other dog play about 6 hours a day and is endlessly entertaining for me. Life is on the upswing again, but I do have a few issues too of course. Georgia, the reason I feel big is because I have a substantial frame. If I have fat to lose, it isnt that much but I need about a size 10 top/6-8 bottom. I really notice it in group photos, I was standing next to a woman who is overweight (big belly, not fit) but I am actually bigger than her. We are all individuals and it is not fair to compare my big boned self to my fine boned friends and work colleagues, but sometimes I do. I am working on getting over it. Sent from my KFJWI using the BariatricPal App