CowgirlJane

Ok I didn't tell anyone until AFTER. I did it by email. I basically told them I would love their support but didn't need any negative remarks. So....my skinny peeps were immediately supportive! My fat peeps have either remained silent (as per my request) or came around to saying they are so happy for me after I had success without dying (ya know all the fears). Holy moly.. I lost over 160# and now weigh I the 140-145 ballpark. Some of my fat peeps never said a word and maybe don't share my joy.. but most that care about me remain thrilled with my success!

We have all been there. At some point you just need to decide that junk food is like that bad boy friend that seems to feel good but in truth hurts you. F* that bad boyfriend, you are worth waaaayyy better!!!

I have lost 160# post sleeve .. I like premier Protein from costco. Low carb, high protein. I also like nectar Syntrax powder but it does not satiate. .. I used to buy Quest Protein Bars. ..but my NUT helped me realize they were an issue for me...they fed my carb addiction.

Woo hoo!!!

I was sleeved in Dec 2011.. at the time I just dreamed of saving my life. I hoped I could maintain under 200#. Getting to 140 was surreal. What has made a huge difference is my physical ability. I can hike, play, dance or whatever. ..I feel so damn normal. That was my deep down dream ..just be normal! !!

ya know Alex, i agree with some of your points, but not all. i am not an expert in anything but me... I am maintaining a 160# weight loss post sleeve. Protein bars are EVIL! haha.. they became my new snickers bar and had to be banned. They are very high carb and I found myself wanting them even though they don't actually taste that great! Low carb Protein drinks on the other hand are a real help to me, and i will be celebrating my 3 year surgivesary ( revision from band to sleeve) in December. They: -replace a meal -replace the nighttime snacking/hunger (a lifelong problem for me!) -they go down easy I have tried lots of them, and keep going back to Premier Protein - chocolate and strawberry flavors. it is thick enough to be filling and tastes good to me. I average one a day.. skip a few days and then occasionally have "fast" days which rely heavily on my protein drinks. This truly is a journey where we each need to find what works for us. and lets be honest, those of us lucky enough to be born female eat ALOT less then men to maintain a healthy weight.

Hey WL, about a year ago my laptop got a nasty virus and since it is "aged" I decided it wasn't worth taking to the pros. I fought that sucker off and killed it using malwarebytes, a free software. I had to run it over and over again, but finally killed it!

Florinda, I had about a 90 minute phone call with a lady that I consider an "aquaintance" through the meetup group I go out with. I essentially opened up my soul to her... like, i get ALOT of positive feedback about my looks but don't get the RIGHT attention... and why? So, I immediately assume that i have a bad personality. she told me that no... people LOVE me at social events. They ask about me when I don't show up. I am social, sweet, friendly and even other women like me. What she shared was that I have a certain "look". For me, it is my hair... I have rock and roll hair. It gets pulled, my ass gets grabbed... my boobs get oogled... but then i don't really get asked out as much as you might think because I don't appreciate or tolerate being treated that way. She compared it to the lady in the meetup who is heavily tatooed... men make completely incorrect assumptions about her as well. Her suggestion was to soften my look. Less body conscious clothes, more flowy feminine clothing. My hair is something that men are really into, but, what my aquaintance shared is that I often have a very "hard" look. About a year ago I went to Nashville on a biz trip with a chinese lady. We spent some time talking about appearances and she shared with me that my Asian standards, I am "exotic" looking... and it is true that I get an odd amount of attention from Asian men... again, I think it is the hair. Anyway, I intend to conduct an experiment and am going to wear a dress with a very high neckline and wear my hear up at the next meetup! I shared in the ladies room a recent story about a pretty interesting guy... expressing interest in me.... and by my standards, I looked like hell at the time. I think that it is really important to think about the "look" you are projecting.

We are shaped by our parents, but we can get past that...that is my dream. My dad was a f*ing nightmare, but I genuinely believe he tried very hard to be better than HIS parents. i strive to be better than mine... or at least make different mistakes. I recognize that much of the "angst" in my life was passed on from my dear and very beloved mama. I hope i didn't share the same affliction with my sons. as young adults, I have tried to tell them that sometimes when I am overly intense, it is a manifestation of my anxiety... and I am sorry... I can't always manage it perfectly. I feel like if I can name it, it takes some power away and helps them roll with it a bit more. My oldest moved back home and we are going through a period of adjustment... I will write more about this later.., This is so selfish, but they are both planning to move to Portland..yeah for them.. this is the time of life to do that. I have one regret in life and that is that I didn't use my 20s to live life a bit, and I want them to do this!... but sad for me. OMG... what am i going to do when I am truly alone?

ya know, I was thrilled, estatic and felt HAWT at 158, but now that I have been at 140, i feel fat at 145. The brain is stupid sometimes. Florinda i have seen your pix, you are cute and sexy just how you are! Love thyself and embrace your self right now. If I could write a letter to myself at your age, that is exactly what i would say. {{hugs}}

No problem with hydration. It is harder the first say 2 months, but after that most of us have no problems at all. I am very active. I lost over 160#. Excercise tone muscles which makes you look better and TIME helps skin shrink some, so the two really help... but let's not be dellusional, exercise does not shrink skin. If someone can find me scientific research that shows exercise shrinks skin... I would love to see it... When I was much younger I lost like 65# and had zero excess skin. Losing 160# in my late 40s was a bit of a different story, after decades of obesity. so, post sleeve, my excess skin wasn't that bad until about the last 30-40# weight loss... so one solution is to stay a little higher weight. But trust me, if you go from 308 to 140, there is skin for two people and it is noticable. It is a good problem to have though compared to obesity!!!

i have a Kindle Fire HDX I think is the right code. WL says same problem with a different device... it is maddening. I also can't seem to edit my posts anymore via a kindle, but maybe I was just hung up, not sure.

For those of us who had a lot of extra skin, one reason for a lower body lift is to eliminate the dog ear risk. but, sounds like they are fixable!

Thanks Alex, what is going on with the invisible typing from the kindle? It didn't used to be like that.

I will be 3 years out in December. I have been maintaining for awhile. I still think "Protein first" but i have shifted my focus to ensuring veggies every meal. Example, i make an egg beaters omelette many mornings.. I start with sauteed veggies. I often have a salad for lunch, with lots of different veggies, not just lettuce - topped with tuna or chicken or something. Snacks are often protein because i find them more satiating than a celery stick.... I can have a piece of nitrate free turkey sandwich meat with a bit of tomato and feel "satisfied" for quite awhile. dinner, well, it is mostly protein and a green veggie type thing like a salad or green Beans, or brussel sprouts, or cauliflower or something. Anyway, I do think we need a lot of veggies and I seldom suffer from constipation or anything like that. My protein is based around fish, other seafood, Protein drinks, sandwich meat (not the best due to sodium, but handy) and some chicken and beef. I tolerate all foods, it is more of a convenience and preference thing.

I know you didn't ask... but I wouldn't date yet. I know that sounds kinda weird, but losing massive weight creates all sorts of changes. I had a lot to loss - 160# plus - and I need to focus on it to get there. My friends and i joke - dating is fattening! I regained 5# last summer when i did start dating. (I have since lost it and a bit more, so no worries, but just a word of caution) I am almost 3 years out and I really dont like to go on big dinner dates even now. I do not choose to tell casual dates about my WLS but i do tell them that i need to eat light to maintain my weight and health. The guys I prefer totally get that and it has generally not been a problem since they tend to be fit/lean types. I often eat a fancy small dinner salad with perhaps a shrimp skewer... I like to order ala carte or off the appetizer menu. If it is with a close friend, we share meals, but a date I wouldn't do that. I love small quantities of wonderful food. I did see someone this last spring for a few weeks who was a food pusher and I kinda realized that was one of many reasons to not keep seeing him. He made me feel uncomfortable if i didn't eat a big meal with him.

Oh, I dress to please myself. I love looking polished, it makes me feel good. I don't actually care what others think but I am just being a realist about what image I might be projecting...

I am curious, why doesn't the surgeon do the followup? Why would a sleeve patient do barium swallow? I love my primary care doc, but she is an ARNP not a an MD so not sure everyone would be comfy with that. She is in the Bothell/Mill Creek area.

I am nearly 3 years post op, and am maintaining an approx 160# loss. I guess you don't get to be the size of two full grown men without there being some "issues" involved, right? Last summer, I was hooked on caffeine big time and was exercising alot. I made goal in Feb 2013 so you can imagine I was feeling like maintaining was a newborn baby that required alot of attention. I didn't exercise to an unhealthy amount, but my motivation was to burn off the anxiety I was feeling.. that is the unhealthy part. I think that when we contemplate our own behaviors, it is the emotions that drive it, and the impact on our lives that determine if it is healthy or not. I used to shop alot at discount stores etc but I didn't spend much and I could afford it. I wasn't addicted, it was more like I marveled that clothes actually looked good on me!!! IT was a novelty. Now, I am like "eh" not so interesting. I don't consider my little blip of being a regular visitor at Ross, TJ Maxx etc as an addiction, but rather a passing phase for me. I have dialed back on both caffeine and exercise considerably... the word addiction means different things to different people so I hesitate to use it, but what I seek is balance and a fullfilling life. I am a work in process, but one of the things I "watch" is what to do with my excess energy. Lately, I have been going to just being active, and less interested in doing boot camps, hard core spinning workouts and stuff. Like, I go dancing which is a bit of exercise AND social. IT makes me feel good, but it doesn't feel like I NEED to do it. When i come home from a night out listening to live music and dancing - which is probably 2-4 times a month (and having zero to 2 drinks depending on the situation and length of evening etc - I never drive buzzed so alot of factors) I feel GREAT. And I feel great the next day, it is like something is being fullfilled. since getting to goal, i feel myself moving up the masloves needs triangle. Now that my basic needs of decent health and fitness is addressed, I seek more from life. I realize that cannot be filled from the outside, but rather from within and I see it as a current and future "area of work" for me. I bet it is for many formerly obese people (and others too!). Like i said, I am a work in process, but the truth of the matter is that once overeating and that protective layer of fat leaves you... you may find yourself trying to figure out what the "new you" is like. For me shedding fat exposed so much energy that it has been a bit much... but i am getting calmer, steadier and more at peace all the time. I realize that this is the number one reason I regained weight when I was younger and got down to a slim weight. I would get very wound up... and just didn't know what to do with it. Being fat made me more sluggish and I guess "content" although that is a strange thought. Anyway, it is good to be armed with information. Some people freak out in the first few months post weight loss - you hear them on this forum wailing over not being able to stuff themselves with food. It didn't really happen for me like that - I think I was oddly more emotionally wrapped up with the fat suit than I was with the food since my "issues" bubbled up more after I got to goal. I guess by the time I had WLS I was so "over" food as a friend, if you know what I mean.

Kim I am sure it's water weight. I had a pretty good weekend over all. 146.2 so down a smidge. I am wondering if I can cautiously try 5:2. Yesterday I had a short hint of those bad feelings and I think I know what triggered it.... I am fine now but really feel cautious...

deleted duplicate

Part 2 of the lesson is that I go out well groomed most of the time. I have a professional career and have always believed that obese people need to dress just a bit sharper because clothes look better on skinny people. I had no make up on, I had fluffed my helmet hair a bit, my jeans were a little baggy and dirty and I was wearing a button up shirt over a tank, and cowboy boots. I was not cleaned up in the least. I wonder sometimes if I look a bit "too much" at times combined with a certain aloofness toward men (self protection idea that I thin bikerchick mentioned on a another thread) that makes strangers say stuff like "your hot" but never ask me out. Reality is I am a horse back riding, hiking, boating, traveling kinda woman who is active and all that...I am rethinking how I dress even when I go out dancing etc....to just be more casual. A lady I know from the meetup (where I go dancing and happy hours etc with) and I had a long top about looks and perceptions. Example, one lady in our group is hugely tatooed and some guys decide she is an easy woman (what a stupid dated notion) and she is actually holding out for a long term. Feedback she gave me is that I often dress "hard edged" when going out but reality is that I am friendly, sweet and social...and have never even dated one of the guys from the meet up. Her advice was to switch to flowing feminine clothes as a social experiment as I stand out in the crowd now. Compared to the average woman in the group I have a hotter bod (no middle age gut and thanks to fitness and plastics a more youthful looking body than many even younger than me) and by wearing harder edge clothing combined with my rock and roll hair (that is my natural hair) just paints an image. ...one of the guys told me at the 80s themed dance that I was hot in any decade....and yet, no one that is nice and age appropriate has asked me out asked me out. Well, that isn't entirely true. I was asked out by someone who admitted he isn't quite 30... haha... and a very nice man closer to my age who has been teaching me some couples dance stuff but we have pretty big religious differences and I am just not interested in him. Anyway, I am just saying this is all food for thought... some people have a certain "look" for whatever reason... and the way you clothe and accessorize that look can change people's impressions.

Just a clarifying point - whole wheat breads, pastas and many grains, fruit are considered healthy carbs and many people have them as part of a good diet. I have learned that I am carb sensitive and so if my daily diet includes a regular dose of these foods...I get hungrier and hungrier...and I crave more and more high carb food. I didn't really learn this about myself until about 7-8 ,months post op so just sharing my experiences since y your remarks hinted that the carbs increased your food cravings. I have lost over 160 and maintaining. The good (or bad) news is that in order to maintain weight loss you have to more or less do what you did to lose weight...so even nearly 3 years post op, I watch all carbs closely...especially when the scale starts inching up.

I was not required to prove I could fail on another diet (oh wait they expect success) ....so I am sorry that you are stuck in this situation. I know others will disagree,but I find that many "starches" trigger cravings and over eating even 3 years post op. It works best for me to eliminate or severely restrict many of them. So I do eat veggies, Protein, berries,greek yogurt etc. On a daily basis I avoid rice, Pasta, bread and potatoes and I eat very little fruit (sugar!)..even 3 years out and below goal.... I never eat fast food,junky food like chips and Cookies. My advice, go back to stage 1. Bread is my nemesis and now my kids have moved back home it surrounds me again. It is a delicious demon which i work very hard to minimize. Do not get me wrong we need some carbs for good health but we need way less than our typical diet includes. Some of us are more insulin resistant and prone to the carb crazy train too.

It is a serious risk, addiction transference is a real risk post WLS. I personally know someone who DIED in her 40s after losing weight post bypass due to alcoholism. She was type 1 diabetic, got uber skinny, went off the rails so to speak (left her hubby and kids) and died an unemployed alcoholic. However, most people don't do this. Let's say it happens to 5 percent (I made that up do not know the stats) it is all part of the calculated risk. I had 100 percent chance of early disability and premature death without surgery with a BMI over 50.. If you think you are at risk, freaking don't drink at all. I choose to socially drink but have rules/boundaries around it just like I do with food.