CowgirlJane

I was band to sleeve revision and lost 160# post sleeve. First surgeon I went to pushed me to bypass saying my failure with band would be repeated with sleeve. I went to a different surgeon who made a strong case for t h e sleeve and 3 Years out I feel he was right in my case. Point is lots of varying opinions out there. Get a second opinion. My surgeon gave me copies of researc studies to help me learn about actual results over just individual success or failure stories on a forum. What I will say is I was anti bypass 3 years ago. I am so "pro" being slender these days I'd have no problem with bypass if thats what it takes.

TRANSFORMATION. I am truly transformed.

Using kindle so have to write real post as a reply..sigh...

Hadini, your post fits with a recent weird conversation. A good friend of mine was telling me about her cousin (who i have met) who has MORE THAN ONCE interferred with a marriage by the guy "falling in love with her". Apparently, she is really ditzy and helpless - not an act, an idiot.... and for a certain type, they fall over themselves wanting to "save her". It is interesting because i met her and she is average/cute, in her 60s, definately an appealing and fun woman, but not exactly a super model either. It is happening again... the husband of a neighbor is at her beck and call. Example, she was gone for a few months and before she headed back home she called him to vaccum her place because she can't stand the dead bugs. I don't think I have ever been in a relationship with a guy I would ask to do that, much less the husband of a neighbor! I try very hard to be independant, and this little story makes me realize that I need to be true to myself, but perhaps allowing people to see my genuine vulnerability wouldn't be so bad. Perhaps there is something attractive about it.

Yes it does. Embrace the suckage! When i finally got to real food, i was almost scared to eat. Then, I realized my tastes had changed. It was a sad feeling, to not enjoy food anymore. But, what i always tell people is take advantage of the bad early weeks and months to work on changing your relationship with food. It is temporary. I am 3 years out, love everything again. I love being trim even more than food so I work pretty hard to maintain my 160# weight loss! It is so worth it.

My life pattern has been to do very little dating and sort of meet someone, immediately be exclusive with them and then spend 15 years with the wrong guy. I did that twice actually. My counselor advised me to casually date. See different men, don't narrow my focus so quickly. I continue to fail at this. This summer I dated one guy for awhile - didn't work out; then another guy for a few months - didn't work out. Neither one of those relationships became a full physical one and we parted company when the realization that this wasn't gonna work became overwhelming and even I could no longer deny it. Okay, I am seeing someone now that i met in real life (not online) and it is going really well. We have not had the "exclusive" talk and I am trying to decide if I want to bring it up, and what i will say if he does. At the moment, we are both pretty smitten with each other. In truth, I am NOT dating others but if I take a step back, I realize I probably should be. Here is the deal, we seem quite compatible but due to work/life situations he is quite likely to move out of the area in the near term. If he is "Mr Right" i would have no problem moving to a sunnier climate with him.... but... it will take a long time before I feel committed enough to do that. So, the most likely scenerio is he is gone from my life in 6 months so it seems like good self preservation to not dive in too deep, to date others etc. And yet, i am not. I am not really in angst about this, as i am taking things one day at a time, but am trying to decide if I should make time in my life to casually date others and let the chips fall where they may. BTW, i finally feel like I have a clue of how to negotiate the dating waters... before I struggled even finding someone I WANTED to have a second date with so I didn't feel like I had alot of options. I think there has been an internal shift in my readiness quite frankly so I am open to meeting someone that could turn into a long term relationship. Those are my comfort zone anyway. In the meantime, life is really good right now! It feels really good to be seeing someone that I like, he likes me and we just seem to connect well on alot of subjects, activities, lifestyle etc. It feels very comfortable and makes me feel happy.

I started at 308 pounds and my experience is that weight loss slowly down, but take advantage of the "fast phase". I lost nearly 30 in the first month. By 6 months i had lost nearly 100#. It took me to 14 months to lose 150#. I lost the last bit over an extended period of time while "in maintenance". Some lose faster, some lose slower... the important thing is to keep working the sleeve. Maintenance is basically the same game as weight loss.

I lost over 160#, so yes I had excess skin! It does improve some with time. If you are younger, you will likely have less of an issue. I have seen people using wraps etc and maybe that works if you don't have much, but if you have lots of excess skin, the solution is learning to accept it and possibly plastics. I will add we are much harsher on ourselves that others judge us. Lets be honest, alot of people out there don't have supermodel bodies!

I am sorry Cathy. Life has so many sad things. I try to remind myself that overeating never fixed any of them and just made me feel worse.

Also known as anchor cut. Google it, go to "real self dot com" and search for both terms.

What the heck is a chia egg? My god those chia pets lay eggs?? So what would the carbs be like in that dish?

My opinion is that whether you reach that goal in 6 or 12 or more months you are still a huge success. Time boxing yourself too much may be setting yourself up for failure. Follow the plan, exercise, become more active, minimize carbs, don't eat to "full" eat till no longer hungry... those techniques will help you lose weight and then maintain.

I supposed i should be clear. When I say exclusive, I am really talking about sex. Dating doesn't equal sex, but I would feel safer about stuff if we were monogamous when we get to that. I mean, I worry about safety and "protection" only goes so far so I would rather be exclusive with someone once we jump in that deep. We are a very long ways away from serious committment talk which is why i suspect this will not last given his possible timeline for moving away is faster than my possible timeline for lifetime comittment talk. I sense I am more gunshy of committment than he is, but who really knows, right? You are all right, in this modern day it really isn't his biz if I date others until we have that agreement. He does not take it for granted and asks me out on dates - but about twice a week which actually leaves me no time for anyone else...haha... and I always say yes cuz we have fun! I have a busy social life that I have actively cultivated - I have friends and peeps who expect me to show up and dance, check out live music, have happy hour, go riding or do whatever it is we do. I WILL NOT drop that social circle I have spent a few years developing because THAT is what I fall back on when I am not "seeing someone."

WLS is life changing. Don't do it if you aren't 100% in the game. I would postpone until you have time to get educated and get your head around it all.

I haven't considered anything for the scars. When my PCP sees them she thinks they look awesome and will continue to mature for another year. My worst scar is the BACK of my lower body lift. The front is basically invisible, but I think more tension was put on the back (that is my theory anyway). I am going to see about having some face injections done at some point, so when I consult for that i might ask about the redness reduction on the arm scars. Even so, they are incredibly flat, even etc so I am pleased with the results.

I am waiting for him to find out when he get time off work, but we want to go pretty soon... likely December. We are trying to decide between big island and Maui. We are active, hikers, snorkeling, sightseeing, nightlife etc less of laying on the beach types (I burn easily!) Looks like your unit is completely booked for a few months out so probably wouldn't work, but thank you! I will definately keep in mind for the future.

Ava, I am so glad you decided to do it. I love my results from plastics, but I would say the arms and breasts made the biggest impact in my looks - even fully clothed in winter wear! My sons girlfriend was the first to openly say it post plastics - I didn't even recognize you from the back (except your hair!). Your arms are so small now, you look younger and slimmer. I was the same weight, I had just lost alot of hanging skin. Those batwings make us look bigger than we are and make stylish clothing fit odd. I know I said it over and over again but i was the most afraid of the arm scars - almost didn't do the arms over that fear - but it turns out to be a big positive impact on my looks. i am 13 months out now. My scars are flat but redder than I would prefer - especially after a shower etc. Luckily people my age don't have that great of vision anymore..haha.. as no one seems to notice them! I am not the least bit self conscious and go sleeveless alot. I am what i am and if people don't like it, oh well - take your glasses off!

My kids are older... both boys were late teens and early 20s at the time of my surgery 3 years ago. I told them about it, but made it no big deal. I know they were worried sick, but they were old enough to see I was becoming crippled by my weight. They were not openly supportive but I think that was more that they didn't know what to say. The youngest has really changed his eating habits as he is prone to chunkiness. He eats very healthy now - clearly I was part of the problem before bringing junky food into the house. I showed my boys a before picture recently and they didn't recognize me. They have now basically forgotten how obese, how sick I really was. They both tell me I am very "young" - looking and attitude. My oldest is great because he caught me seriously stress eating last week. He wasn't judging, but he just said "mom, you are stress eating" and then went on to tell me what my behavior looked like compared to my "new normal". Anyway, when momma changes it does impact the whole family. It might be a wild ride, might be a calm one, but things WILL change.

I am planning a trip to Hawaii. I am gonna see if I can't leverage that into some motivation!

Ok... A dose of motivation. ..looks like I WILL be going to Hawaii! First time ever for me! I would love to be more like 145 rather than 150. That is good reason to give up bread etc again!

I think my drain was in for a week. I had drains as a precaution as a band to sleeve revision

I had very poor results with lapband, but have been maintaining a huge weight loss post sleeve (over 160# lost). I think there is a real difference between the two procedures, but I also think there were real differences in ME too. I was better educated, less defensive, considerably more desparate for success by the time I was sleeved. I mean, I felt like it was life or death to get some weight off. That level of motivation and unrelenting effort for about 14 months got me to goal. It is pretty easy to slack off once you have had initial success, but if you have alot of weight to lose like I did, you just can't slack off or you won't make your goal.

Okay, I didn't realize you weren't taking supplements. Do that. make sure you get the B complex ones too.

My opinion you are describing a fairly typical post op experience. I did not feel fully human till about 3 months post op. Take your supplements, make sure you are getting adequate Protein, rest when you need to and just accept that this "malaise" is normal for many people. I think my first post op bloodwork was either 3 or 6 months post sleeve. My bloodwork was PERFECT, but I felt like you are describing until I was 3-4 months post op.