Dooter

Today, I didn't have the fatigue mid-morning like I did the other days. Step in the right direction! I'm getting better and better every day I'll be making an appointment to remove my stitches soon. Can't wait
Starting protein shakes tonite

So I had my blood work done yesterday and my gallbladder ultrasound. Tomorrow I start my pre op diet. Friday I meet with the nutritionist. I'm so excited but also super nervous. I'm so ready for this.
 
I've been telling my daughter who is three that I'll be having surgery and I'm going to get smaller/Skinny. So on a daily basis she asks "mommy are you skinny yet" lol.. I say no not yet and try to explain to her that I will be normal size or the size of her aunt or my mom (who are both average size) then I will be "skinny".. she looks at me all sweet and concerned and says "but I don't want you to be a skinny mommy I can't love you if your skinny". She is so confused I say I'm going to be smaller/ healthier and she says "but where is the rest of you going to go? I will miss you".. I just keep telling her she will be able to love me more and longer because I will be healthy and alive alot longer now. It makes me happy that she loves me no matter what but also sad that she has no idea how much more fun we could have if I wasnt so big now.
 
I am even more sure that this is the right choice for me.

Dear Food,
I know you think I'm stupid for talking to you because...well, you're food and you can't hear me. I just want to tell you that it's been quite a ride these last 42 years. We've had our ups and ups and ups and ups and downs and ups and ups. It's time for our relationship to change. I'm not breaking up with you, because I still need you to live, however, our relationship has to change now. And really....believe me when I say...It's not you. It's me. I'm the one with the problem, so don't ever blame yourself. You're really sweet. And salty. And delicious...OH WHAT AM I SAYING....how can we ever part?? NO!! We must part for a time. Two weeks- no more than five, I promise. When we come back together- things will be different. You must hide your sweetness from me. Don't tempt me further with your refinements. I want to see the REAL you....the one with all the vitamins and minerals and protein...yes...I said protein. Hey, I told you things were going to change. And for pete's sake, stop bringing your friends around! But don't worry...you'll always have a place...sorta...close to my heart...
 
 
 
 
No, I didn't have a mental break. I start liquids Monday. (siiiigh)

Dear Food,
I know you think I'm stupid for talking to you because...well, you're food and you can't hear me. I just want to tell you that it's been quite a ride these last 42 years. We've had our ups and ups and ups and ups and downs and ups and ups. It's time for our relationship to change. I'm not breaking up with you, because I still need you to live, however, our relationship has to change now. And really....believe me when I say...It's not you. It's me. I'm the one with the problem, so don't ever blame yourself. You're really sweet. And salty. And delicious...OH WHAT AM I SAYING....how can we ever part?? NO!! We must part for a time. Two weeks- no more than five, I promise. When we come back together- things will be different. You must hide your sweetness from me. Don't tempt me further with your refinements. I want to see the REAL you....the one with all the vitamins and minerals and protein...yes...I said protein. Hey, I told you things were going to change. And for pete's sake, stop bringing your friends around! But don't worry...you'll always have a place...sorta...close to my heart...
 
 
 
 
No, I didn't have a mental break. I start liquids Monday. (siiiigh)

Dear Food,
I know you think I'm stupid for talking to you because...well, you're food and you can't hear me. I just want to tell you that it's been quite a ride these last 42 years. We've had our ups and ups and ups and ups and downs and ups and ups. It's time for our relationship to change. I'm not breaking up with you, because I still need you to live, however, our relationship has to change now. And really....believe me when I say...It's not you. It's me. I'm the one with the problem, so don't ever blame yourself. You're really sweet. And salty. And delicious...OH WHAT AM I SAYING....how can we ever part?? NO!! We must part for a time. Two weeks- no more than five, I promise. When we come back together- things will be different. You must hide your sweetness from me. Don't tempt me further with your refinements. I want to see the REAL you....the one with all the vitamins and minerals and protein...yes...I said protein. Hey, I told you things were going to change. And for pete's sake, stop bringing your friends around! But don't worry...you'll always have a place...sorta...close to my heart...
 
 
 
 
No, I didn't have a mental break. I start liquids Monday. (siiiigh)

Dear Food,
I know you think I'm stupid for talking to you because...well, you're food and you can't hear me. I just want to tell you that it's been quite a ride these last 42 years. We've had our ups and ups and ups and ups and downs and ups and ups. It's time for our relationship to change. I'm not breaking up with you, because I still need you to live, however, our relationship has to change now. And really....believe me when I say...It's not you. It's me. I'm the one with the problem, so don't ever blame yourself. You're really sweet. And salty. And delicious...OH WHAT AM I SAYING....how can we ever part?? NO!! We must part for a time. Two weeks- no more than five, I promise. When we come back together- things will be different. You must hide your sweetness from me. Don't tempt me further with your refinements. I want to see the REAL you....the one with all the vitamins and minerals and protein...yes...I said protein. Hey, I told you things were going to change. And for pete's sake, stop bringing your friends around! But don't worry...you'll always have a place...sorta...close to my heart...
 
 
 
 
No, I didn't have a mental break. I start liquids Monday. (siiiigh)

I'm one day post-op and I feel like a million bucks. I'm sore of course, but I haven't taken any pain medicine all day - I figure if my menstrual cramps were this bad, I wouldn't take pain meds for them, so why for this? All in all, I feel pretty good - its hard to get comfortable for me because i'm a stomach sleeper - well - at least I won't be for a while.
 
We checked in at the hotel and its a beautiful room - just kinda haning out - hubby is snoozing - I took a little nap. Time seems to crawl by - I have to be back at the clinic for a checkup at 5- they come to get us.
 
I swear if the peope at the clinc were any nicer, they'd melt in the rain like sugar. I can't get over how they are so genuinely sweet. They don't condescend to you, they don't forget about you. They're really there to take care of you.
 
I'm now to the point where I can sip water, but I still feel pretty hydrated from the iv's.
 
I cannot wait to take a shower. Hopefully that will be tonite.
 
I'm still a little gassy, but nothing spectacular. I'm hoping to sleep through the night, but don't have any expectations to. Again, that's just me - I'm an insomniac.
 
Oh - and everyone at the clinic is just gorgeous. Inside and out.

Well, I just had to write a few words about what happened today when I went to see my primary care physician. Let me tell you a little background first.
 
I am seven and a half months post op. I had my surgery June 18 in Tijuana, MX. And I am thrilled to no end with my results so far. Have lost right around 98 pounds. (It varies depending on the day.)
 
I was living and working in California when I decided that I wanted to have the surgery. I am a travel nurse, but my home is in Iowa. I traveled home to Iowa in June for a couple weeks off, then my husband and I were going to fly to San Diego and travel on to Tijuana for the surgery. I went to see my PCP the day before we flew to San Diego to get my meds refilled. I hadn't seen him again till today, so hadn't been in his office since June of 2011.
 
When the nurse called my name today, I got up to follow her to the exam room. As usual, she led me to the scale on the way to the exam room. In the past, I have frequently declined to get weighed, as I didn't want/need to be depressed by what it said. But in my new, current life, I am not afraid of the scale anymore. So I hopped up on the scale to see what it would say. (I had already weighed myself at home this morning and was 160 lbs without a stitch on!)
 
The digital readout of the doctor's scale said 162, which is about right, since I had a pair of jeans on and a pair of boots. The nurse went to write it down, and said "hold on a minute! What is your name again? What is your birthdate? When were you here last?" I told her my name, birthdate and that I was last seen there in June of 2011. She then replied "well who ever weighed you that day is an idiot! They wrote the wrong weight down. They wrote that you weighed 260 pounds!!!! I need to change that!"
 
 
I laughed and told her there was nothing wrong with the weight in the chart, that I had lost almost 100 pounds in the last 7 1/2 months. She was amazed and had all kinds of questions. When I told her that I had undergone a Vertical Sleeve Gastrectomy she didn't know what it was. So I gave her a short course on VSG.
 
Anyway, I guess I can count this as one of my NSV!
 
P.S. the doctor told me I looked amazing, and was SO encouraging. He thought I made the right decision and told me to keep at it.

I just have to say...God is good. He's good when things are good and He's good when things are bad. He doesn't change. It's easy for me to be thankful right now because my life is like a freakin' fairy tale! (my biggest problem is that I'm fat. oh woo.) How did I deserve this life??? I didn't. God in His infinite grace and mercy has lavished it upon me. I have to say it gives me some uneasy feelings when I look at the misery around me. I almost feel guilty. My husband, my children and I enjoy relative good health. We have more food and "stuff" than anyone could ever need. It's not fancy, but there's a lot of it. I could go on for days about how blessed we are. And for that I say Thank You Lord!! (I'm sorry if this offends anyone, but it's my blog space;)
 
On this forum, I've read about more than just surgery and weight loss. I've read about people. Real people with real lives. People who have lost the ones they love most to d.u.i., unexpected death in the family, house fires that have taken away not only possessions, but family as well, people who were abused as sweet little children and are now fighting their own bodies over it, people who put their faith, love and trust into a spouse and get nothing but venom and hatred in return. I've read about the pains and emotions that can go along with this surgery, and the possibility of being hospitalized for endless months with endless complications. I've read about people who are being rejected by friends or family because they've made the decision to become a healthier person. I've read about a LOT of pain. A lot of heartache.
 
I hope and pray that if the terrible awfuls of this world befall me, I will still have the faith to say Thank you Lord! He is Good! I am thankful for my life and my salvation and I am praying for successful surgery and weight loss. And I have been/am/will be praying for every one of you.
 
--danielle

I just have to say...God is good. He's good when things are good and He's good when things are bad. He doesn't change. It's easy for me to be thankful right now because my life is like a freakin' fairy tale! (my biggest problem is that I'm fat. oh woo.) How did I deserve this life??? I didn't. God in His infinite grace and mercy has lavished it upon me. I have to say it gives me some uneasy feelings when I look at the misery around me. I almost feel guilty. My husband, my children and I enjoy relative good health. We have more food and "stuff" than anyone could ever need. It's not fancy, but there's a lot of it. I could go on for days about how blessed we are. And for that I say Thank You Lord!! (I'm sorry if this offends anyone, but it's my blog space;)
 
On this forum, I've read about more than just surgery and weight loss. I've read about people. Real people with real lives. People who have lost the ones they love most to d.u.i., unexpected death in the family, house fires that have taken away not only possessions, but family as well, people who were abused as sweet little children and are now fighting their own bodies over it, people who put their faith, love and trust into a spouse and get nothing but venom and hatred in return. I've read about the pains and emotions that can go along with this surgery, and the possibility of being hospitalized for endless months with endless complications. I've read about people who are being rejected by friends or family because they've made the decision to become a healthier person. I've read about a LOT of pain. A lot of heartache.
 
I hope and pray that if the terrible awfuls of this world befall me, I will still have the faith to say Thank you Lord! He is Good! I am thankful for my life and my salvation and I am praying for successful surgery and weight loss. And I have been/am/will be praying for every one of you.
 
--danielle

I just have to say...God is good. He's good when things are good and He's good when things are bad. He doesn't change. It's easy for me to be thankful right now because my life is like a freakin' fairy tale! (my biggest problem is that I'm fat. oh woo.) How did I deserve this life??? I didn't. God in His infinite grace and mercy has lavished it upon me. I have to say it gives me some uneasy feelings when I look at the misery around me. I almost feel guilty. My husband, my children and I enjoy relative good health. We have more food and "stuff" than anyone could ever need. It's not fancy, but there's a lot of it. I could go on for days about how blessed we are. And for that I say Thank You Lord!! (I'm sorry if this offends anyone, but it's my blog space;)
 
On this forum, I've read about more than just surgery and weight loss. I've read about people. Real people with real lives. People who have lost the ones they love most to d.u.i., unexpected death in the family, house fires that have taken away not only possessions, but family as well, people who were abused as sweet little children and are now fighting their own bodies over it, people who put their faith, love and trust into a spouse and get nothing but venom and hatred in return. I've read about the pains and emotions that can go along with this surgery, and the possibility of being hospitalized for endless months with endless complications. I've read about people who are being rejected by friends or family because they've made the decision to become a healthier person. I've read about a LOT of pain. A lot of heartache.
 
I hope and pray that if the terrible awfuls of this world befall me, I will still have the faith to say Thank you Lord! He is Good! I am thankful for my life and my salvation and I am praying for successful surgery and weight loss. And I have been/am/will be praying for every one of you.
 
--danielle

YAY!!! My cardiologist OK'd me for surgery! Says I'm low risk and other than my weight, pretty healthy!! WOO HOO!! I know I don't have any heart trouble, but for some reason I was worried about this being a snag. So...anyway....there's that then..

Today has been a very blessed day so far. I think God plants little gifts in my life along the way, so that when I stumble upon one of them, I gain hope and encouragement.
My thankful list for today is:
The sun is out
My parents and sister have been supporting me through this 100%.
I get to eat normal-ish food.
I'm going to see the new Sherlock Holmes today!!
I have an amazing woman as a walking buddy.
 
I think when we're thankful, life brightens up, and we stop thinking about ourselves and our situations. It redirects our selfishness into praise to God, and thankfulness for all He has done. I challenge you to make a list of five things you're thankful for, and spend some time praising the One who orchestrated them.
 
Praying for all of you today.
Erica