Barbarajo

My Lab-Band story is a very short one right now.  This is just the beginning of an entire new lease on life for me.  I think previous to this I had given up,  wondering how I would every get thin again,  almost not caring, telling myself being so overweight was OK, this is the way I am and just eating as much crap as I could.  I was actually trying to make myself feel better with food when I was actually miserable and disgusted with myself.  My husband said he loved me as I am, but our sex life is almost non existant, I love my husband and realised that the problem was me.  Our sex life was terrible because of how ashamed I was of my body and how I looked.  I was not thin as a child but not obease either.  I was plump thru highschool.  When I had my 1st child 30 years ago I gained an extrordinary amount of weight.  I was up to being 190 for the 1st time in my life.  I dieted, excercised and threw up and was down to 117 lbs.  Then it came back, then some how I got it off again but maybe got back down to 150.then up and down and up. Right now I am feeling a little relieved to have a new plan, to actually get healthy and eat healthy and staying healthy -- which is due to my PCP - they actually suggested this for me.  I had no idea of all the tests and bloodwork that one has to go thru prior to getting the lap band, and all the guidance you recieve from so many people.  This process has really help me to understand that I can go thru all this, but the actual final out come is up to me.  This is no qucik fix, but a process of relearning how to eat, how to eat healthy and how important this is to be combined with physicial excercise and activity to live a longer happy and healthy existance.  
I enjoyed writing this because I have NEVER said the above out loud to any one.  I am actually very surprised that I put these words on the internet.