NinerGirl74

My name is Gina, I'm 37 years old, and I've been approved for surgery, yay! I will be having the Vertical Sleeve Gastrectomy on November 3, 2011 at California Pacific Medical Center in San Francisco. I have been "morbidly obese" for awhile now. My struggle with weight problems has occurred since I was about 25 years old. From about the time I was diagnosed with hypothyroidism when I was 22, I felt that I was destined to gain weight. I was extremely fatigued despite the medication I started taking, which is now a very high dose of Synthroid ... 0.275 mg to be exact. I'm 5 feet tall and I weigh 218 lbs. My BMI is 42. I wasn't overweight while growing up, and this is the first time I've weighed this much. In fact, I was very petite growing up. I don't mean to sound cavelier but I am not used to being fat, and boy, do I look and feel like fat. I wouldn't say that I'm ashamed of myself but I do feel very embarrassed, have a low self esteem, little to no confidence, and sometimes depressed over the way I look and feel. Maybe I am ashamed ... well at least I'm not just sitting back. I'm doing something about my health once and for all. My husband loves me no matter what, although I can't say that I am 100% sure he is still sexually attracted to me (he says he still is). It's hard to gauge our sex life because we have a 2 1/2 year old son, and he still sleeps in our bed! Well, we have our opportunities but when you are overweight and unhealthy, you don't feel sexy. At least I don't. I sometimes hide myself behind a towel after I get out of the shower because I don't want him to see my stomach. My tummy is embarrassingly bigger than when we first met 8 years ago. I know he loves me but I want to feel sexy again. My family has been totally supportive of my decision. My friends have also been supportive! I haven't gone around town telling everyone I know about the surgery because I believe everything has its place & time, but I can't wait to show off the results! Part of me sometimes feels that this surgery isn't going to happen, like it's too good to be true. I must say though, on September 9, 2011, I found out I was approved by the insurance company for surgery. I was ecstatic!! I still am pinching myself to make sure it's really going to happen. The reason why I feel like this is so easy to explain... Every year, especially upon making my New Year's resolutions, I say, "this is the year that I'm going to lose weight and be thin!" I fully intend to go through with his plan, and I join a gym, go walking, and eat healthier, but somewhere between chilly weather and laziness, I give up. I hate giving up. Why is it that I only give up on myself but not others? I didn't feel it was very fair to myself. Around May 2010, I spoke to my endocrinologist about being so unhappy because of my weight. I told her that I desperately needed a solution. She prescribed Meridia. By early October, I had lost 23 lbs. I started to give away my clothes; I was sooo happy! Then by my mid October, my doctor's office called to tell me that the FDA had recalled the drug. All of a sudden, the depression kicked in. I thought it was hopeless. I thought I would be fat forever. I gained back all of that 23 lbs. One day when I was twiddling my thumbs, I remembered there were such surgeries that existed like the Gastric Bypass or the Lap-Band procedure. (At this point, I had never heard of the Vertical Sleeve Gastrectomy.) So I inquired about the Lap-Band when I saw my endocrinologist in May 2011. She thought it was a good idea, and referred me to Dr. Gregg Jossart. Luckily, he shares the same office space so it made my life easier. As required, I went to a support group, learned about the various bariatric surgeries, and got to listen to people who had bariatric surgery. I felt inspired! I met with Dr. Jossart on June 21, 2011 and he said I am a great candidate for the Gastric Sleeve. After meeting with the psychologist and the dietitician several times, they sent their reports to Dr. Jossart's office. After two weeks of waiting, I found out the good news. So I hope you will follow me on this journey! I promise to give as many details as possible. Thanks for reading!

Okay so first let me start by saying I have a hate/love relationship with Phentermine. And also, I think my dietician is mad that I started taking it. That aside, I got weighed at my detician's office yesterday and she confirmed that I've lost 6 lbs! Happy camper. Well when I first started taking the Phentermine, I realized that it was going to take awhile to get used to. It kept me up til 1:00-1:30 am every night! I was like, how the hell am going to get up for work in the morning? And somehow I did. I was wide awake! Weird. So basically, the Phentermine bothers me for about 2 hours every day and that when that first effect of jitters wears off, I feel better. I've cut down on portions, ate healthy foods, and I only drink water. I take that back, I also drink coffee but only in the mornings and I am trying to ween myself off completely because I know I can't drink it after surgery. My plan is to stay on Phentermine for one more week to see if I can lose more, and then I'm going off. But I feel good weighing 215 lbs again! Anyone else try Phentermine? Did you have a similar experience?

Okay, so even though my scale at home needs a new battery, I know for a fact I've gained 5 lbs. I'm supposed to lose 5-10 lbs before surgery and I felt so pressured last week. I decided to give in and call my bariatric doctor's office on Friday for a prescription of Phentermine. After all, he did say at the support group he would prescribe it if needed. Well, I need it! I haven't been eating right. Having last meals, and I know that's not good. I should be eating more vegetables and having salads with my meals. I had a cold last week and it lasted way too long. I feel like in a way I'm still battling it, and now I have to battle this weight loss before surgery. Not sure if it's going to happen but today I started the Phentermine and already I feel jittery. I have taken diet aids in the past (duh, I've tried lots of things to lose weight) and I am hopeful that it will work. I just hate having this feeling of the jitters at work! Being at work sucks these days. It gets so busy, and then there's down time. I just want this surgey to happen ASAP. So I decided in order to track my results for weight loss. I am going to take pictures the night before my surgery, and have my mom take my measurements. I think it's a good idea. Anyone else do that? P.S. I'm buying a new battery for that scale!

<BR><BR>So glad we met and so glad you introduced me to this website!! Re your husband & therapist: Hopefully they will realize that this is the best route for you. It just sucks because not everyone is like us, so they don't understand. I worry about how people will take it after the weight is gone. Some people in my family can be judgmental at times. I can see one or two people saying, "you act different now that you lost weight." Well, I hope I would be happier and if that's acting different, what's so wrong with that?<BR><BR>I wish I could go to the group in Novato but it's far for me, especially because I don't own a car! Yup, it's true. I need one though, because my son is getting older (he turns 3 in December) and I need to stop relying on people to drive me & my family everywhere. Well, my mom lives with us and she has a car, so that has made it easier for us (and also I guess makes us more lazy). My husband doesn't even drive... we both don't have our licenses. Okay, now you know all of the dirty details. But I must assure you, in SF you don't need a car if you're only traveling within SF. I have relied on the bus for everything... (you must have your mouth hung open!)<BR><BR>I would love to meet up with you before the surgery if possible. Let me know what you think. We can meet in downtown SF if that's convenient or if not, we will just have to email each other and post on here.<BR><BR>P.S. I hope they put our rooms next to each other!! : )

<BR><BR><BR>Thanks so much for your post!! Glad to meet you and let's take this journey together!

Hello there, this is my first post. I just started a blog. My name is Gina, I'm 37 and I also have a two and a half year old! After surgery, I doubt he will notice much about my body, but he will know something is up when I will finally be able to catch him becuase right now he can outrun me! haha. My surgery date is November 3, 2011. I can't wait!