MandiMand

You make a very good point! I started doing "Curves Complete" at my gym, and depending on which Phase you are in, you have to increase your calories. At first I was scared, thinking will it backfire on me or what? But if anything, it has helped! And because I am eating on a schedule now, and the right combinations of foods, I am never feeling hungry, physically. Emotionally, I'm still working on that. But my recent success is really bringing this into focus for me.

Thank you ladies!

That is really fantastic, way to go!

Hi all! I was banded December 30th, 2011. I started rather low on the scale, so to speak, at 218. I am at 203 now, and need someone to help me stay motivated and focused, esp. since my weight loss has been sluggish, at best.

When were you banded? I was having similar frustrations last month because I went in and complained how I was able to eat like I did before surgery, and I had even gained some weight back. The PAC told me she wanted me to learn to eat properly, and that she would only give me .5cc. I was floored! I had a follow up with a NP from the weight management center (the same center we have to go to for our pre-surgical education), and I told her how I felt very unsupported, and that it was as if I was being punished. She said that at the end of the day, we are just as much a consumer as we are a patient, and that if the band is not working, we need to speak up and ask to either have another fill, or if the doctor is not agreeable, to ask to see if the band has slipped or has a leak that is causing us not to feel anything. Hope this helps!

Went into see my surgeon last week. Was up 2.8lbs. They decided that since I was honest about how I have learned to eat around the band and am oviously gaining, I would only get .5cc this time. I feel discouraged about that, although I am trying to remain positive. I know I am at fault for the gain/relapse. But how do I get out of it? is what I want to know...

A co-worker has one and she loves it. She suggested I may want to buy one, but I hadn't heard of it before she mentioned it, so I wanted to get some more insight.

When I first read Geneen Roth's Women, Food and God—in one big gulp—I knew I'd found something profound. I don't like the term food addict, but I realize I've been one, and it has taken me years to learn (and relearn) that the choices we make about what we put in our mouths are only stand-ins for the beliefs we carry in our minds and our hearts. So as I read Geneen's book, I recognized such a basic truth—and one that I seem to need to be reminded about time and time again: A lot of us use food as a drug—to hide from our feelings, to anesthetize ourselves, to escape. And I really wanted to talk to Geneen about this, because she seems to understand better than anybody else how we torture ourselves over a number on a scale or a size on a dress when we'd be better off putting our energy into loving and understanding our real selves. Here's a piece of our conversation: Oprah: I think this book could have been called Women, Shopping and God, or Women, Meth and God, or Women, Gambling and God, since food is just one of the things we use to deny our own worthiness—for love, for godliness, for peace. So why is understanding our obsession with weight the key to finally losing it? Geneen Roth: A lot of people come to me and say they just want to lose the weight. And they want to get it over with, and they want the problem to go away, and they want to wake up thin tomorrow. But they don't really want to look at the beliefs that are fueling the whole obsession or, really, their relationships to themselves, to their families, to their lives. They don't really want to look. What happens is that people end up losing weight ten, 20, 30, 50 times in their lives. They just endlessly do it, because they think endless dieting is a way to get a handle on their problem. But even if they get a handle on their dieting, just losing weight is not the point. Unless you really see what your core beliefs are, what's making you overeat—beliefs like "I'm damaged; I don't deserve this; love is not for me; this will never work out; God is a ruse; goodness is not for me; I'll always be separated from what I love"—and until you name those beliefs, they will shape your life willy-nilly. You'll just keep on acting them out by punishing yourself with food. But if you can finally get to understanding the beliefs underneath, you can learn how to live. Oprah: You wrote Women, Food and God because you wanted women to— GR: I wanted women to, first of all, stop thinking about their "problems with food" as the biggest curse in their lives. It's the issues underneath the "problems with food" that need to be dealt with. I also wrote it because I wanted to share the knowledge that using food as the doorway to understanding yourself can lead to unimaginable beauty and openness and a kind of awakening. Most people don't know that. I think we all have a hunger that's hard to name. A lot of people who come to my retreats have never named it before, or else they've named it in church, but they can't actually see the connection between what they're doing with food and this yearning. I call it "the flame" that they have: They yearn for big answers to live a big life. But they have to start with the most basic fears. Oprah: And this book is the place to start. It's an opportunity, a chance for all of us who have carried the curse of weight, the burden of weight, the struggle of weight to realize that understanding the roots of that struggle can lead to something richer, deeper, and more profound. I'm telling everyone to read it now! Read more: http://www.oprah.com/health/Geneen-Roth-Talks-to-Oprah-About-Women-Food-And-God#ixzz1rBz5ovTo

Eating to feed a feeling, and not a growling stomach, is emotional eating.ByHeather Hatfield WebMD FeatureReviewed byCharlotte E. Grayson Mathis, MD When you're happy, your food of choice could be steak or pizza, when you're sad it could be ice cream or Cookies, and when you're bored it could be potato chips. Food does more than fill our stomachs -- it also satisfies feelings, and when you quench those feelings with comfort food when your stomach isn't growling, that's emotional eating. "Emotional eating is eating for reasons other than hunger," says Jane Jakubczak, a registered dietitian at the University of Maryland. "Instead of the physical symptom of hunger initiating the eating, an emotion triggers the eating." Recommended Related to Diet & Weight Management Small Changes to Get Healthier By Richard Laliberte Read the Small Changes to Get Healthier article > > What are the telltale signs of emotional eating, what foods are the most likely culprits when it comes to emotional eating, and how it can be overcome? Experts help WebMD find the answers. How to Tell the Difference There are several differences between emotional hunger and physical hunger, according to the University of Texas Counseling and Mental Health Center web site: 1. Emotional hunger comes on suddenly; physical hunger occurs gradually. 2. When you are eating to fill a void that isn't related to an empty stomach, you crave a specific food, such as pizza or ice cream, and only that food will meet your need. When you eat because you are actually hungry, you're open to options. 3. Emotional hunger feels like it needs to be satisfied instantly with the food you crave; physical hunger can wait. 4. Even when you are full, if you're eating to satisfy an emotional need, you're more likely to keep eating. When you're eating because you're hungry, you're more likely to stop when you're full. 5. Emotional eating can leave behind feelings of guilt; eating when you are physically hungry does not. Comfort Foods When emotional hunger rumbles, one of its distinguishing characteristics is that you're focused on a particular food, which is likely a comfort food. "Comfort foods are foods a person eats to obtain or maintain a feeling," says Brian Wansink, PhD, director of the Food and Brand Lab at the University of Illinois. "Comfort foods are often wrongly associated with negative moods, and indeed, people often consume them when they're down or depressed, but interestingly enough, comfort foods are also consumed to maintain good moods." Ice cream is first on the comfort food list. After ice cream, comfort foods break down by sex: For women it's chocolate and cookies; for men it's pizza, steak, and casserole, explains Wansink. And what you reach for when eating to satisfy an emotion depends on the emotion. According to an article by Wansink, published in the July 2000 American Demographics, "The types of comfort foods a person is drawn toward varies depending on their mood. People in happy moods tended to prefer ... foods such as pizza or steak (32%). Sad people reached for ice cream and cookies 39% of the time, and 36% of bored people opened up a bag of potato chips." Overfeeding Emotions "We all eat for emotional reasons sometimes," says Jakubczak, who has talked to college students at the University of Maryland about emotional eating. When eating becomes the only or main strategy a person uses to manage emotions, explains Jakubczak, then problems arise -- especially if the foods a person is choosing to eat to satisfy emotions aren't exactly healthy. "If you eat when you are not hungry, chances are your body does not need the calories," says Jakubczak. "If this happens too often, the extra calories get stored as fat, and too much fat storage can cause one to be overweight, which may present some health risks." According to an interview with Jakubczak on the University of Maryland web site, 75% of overeating is caused by emotions, so dealing with emotions appropriately is important. Recognizing Emotional Eating "The first thing one needs to do to overcome emotional eating is to recognize it," says Jakubczak. "Keeping a food record and ranking your hunger from 1-10 each time you put something in your mouth will bring to light 'if' and 'when' you are eating for reasons other than hunger." Next, you need to learn techniques that help manage emotions besides eating, explains Jakubczak. "Oftentimes when a child is sad, we cheer them up with a sweet treat," says Jakubczak. "This behavior gets reinforced year after year until we are practicing the same behavior as adults. We never learned how to deal with the sad feeling because we always pushed it away with a sweet treat. Learning how to deal with feelings without food is a new skill many of us need to learn." Managing Emotional Eating Here are a few tips to help you deal with emotional eating: Recognize emotional eating and learn what triggers this behavior in you. Make a list of things to do when you get the urge to eat and you're not hungry, and carry it with you, according to the Tufts Nutrition web site. When you feel overwhelmed, you can put off that desire by doing another enjoyable activity. Try taking a walk, calling a friend, playing cards, cleaning your room, doing laundry, or something productive to take your mind off the craving -- even taking a nap, according to the Tufts Nutrition web site. When you do get the urge to eat when you're not hungry, find a comfort food that's healthy instead of junk food. "Comfort foods don't need to be unhealthy," says Wansink. For some, leaving comfort foods behind when they're dieting can be emotionally difficult. Wansink tells WebMD, "The key is moderation, not elimination." He suggests dividing comfort foods into smaller portions. For instance, if you have a large bag of chips, divide it into smaller containers or baggies and the temptation to eat more than one serving can be avoided. When it comes to comfort foods that aren't always healthy, like fattening Desserts, Wansink also offers this piece of information: "Your memory of a food peaks after about four bites, so if you only have those bites, a week later you'll recall it as just a good experience than if you polished off the whole thing." So have a few bites of cheesecake, then call it quits, and you'll get equal the pleasure with lower cost. Lastly, remember that emotional eating is something that most people do when they're bored, happy, or sad. It might be a bag of chips or a steak, but whatever the food choice, learning how to control it and using moderation are key. **Found on the webmd site**

I'm actually in Delaware, but couldn't find any support groups for this area. Hope you don't mind if I "tag" along...

I'm glad to see all the suggestions and also thanks to those who shared your own stories, it makes me feel better to know I'm not the only one feeling this way. I have been cleaning a little here and there today, and while it's not hard core cleaning, I think it's progress. I guess I could apply that to my WLS journey. A little progress here and there is better than no progress at all

And it is really my fault, so I have nobody or nothing to blame. I was banded in December, and lost 12 pounds since. I know my eating habits are still bad, and there are days when I start out right and end up badly. Yesterday is such an example. For Breakfast, I had a banana and a couple of hours later a high Protein Cereal with light soy milk. lunch was a lean cuisine, mid afternoon snack was a small pack of almonds and a slice of colby-jack cheese. Starting feeling a little hungry before I left work, and had a tablespoon of PB and 1 oz of Jerky. dinner was 4 oz of beef, with some yellow sqaush. Then later in the evening, I made a personal pizza and ruined what would have been a fairly decent day. I know this is emotional eating, and the odd thing is when I am home alone on my days off, I barely eat, but in the evenings after work when I am home with my husband and son, I feel so stressed, so I eat. I know this side eating is what is keeping me from succeeding, but I feel almost powerless to stop it.

It's funny you should mention scrambled eggs. I realized last week I too have the same issue! I can however, eat scrambled egg whites without any issues. And ground beef is ok as long as it is not well done or dry. Then we have some MAJOR issues!

Oooh, sounds like fun!

This looks pretty cool! I'm in Delaware, so maybe once in a while I can come down and join up. I use almost any excuse to come down to the D.C. area!

((((hugs)))) I know this is a difficult time for you, and I agree with what some of the others have said. It's difficult to be happy when you are being consumed with thoughts, especially those of your ex. OMG do I know! I think maybe seeing a counselor or therapist would be a good thing for you right now. Are there also any WLS support groups in your area? My Dr's office has a once a month group, and I believe there are some other's in my area too. I've been kinda scared to go, but I think it's going to help me a lot. Geneen Roth has an excellent book out that my therapist (also an LB-er!) recommended, called, "When food Is Love," which is about emotional eating. I saw myself so many times over and over in that book. You should definetely check it out.

What a FANTASTIC post! Very motivational too. My husband is an enabler, and I know that he is, and I admittedly have taken advantage of that to eat some not so good for me foods. But your post reminded me that's not a good thing! I think I may have to print it out and put it at my desk at work (and some other places) to remind me that it's up to ME to make this work, not anyone else!

I was banded in December, and lost almost all of the 14 pounds I have thus far that first week and a half. Then, I thought this would be so fricken easy! Now I realize that it is not going to be that easy, and I need to really work this thing. There are days when I feel discouraged (as I'm sure most of us has!), but I know I can do it. And I have a motivation coming up at the end of summer... my 20th high school reunion!

I have only been banded since December, but I know what my issues are. I found out I can still eat some stuff I was told I probably wouldn't be able to, so I do, even if only in small amounts. When my MIL sent my hubby home with chocolates (mini ones!) instead of tossing it out, I ate a couple. Which turned into more, and more, and now the whole bag is done. I am also an emotional eater, and while I am working on my mind, I let my irrational side of the brain take over in some instances, and eat too fast, too much, or both. It's a struggle I am still working on, and I need to send the irrational thoughts packing. And soon.

B-52: Oops, sorry to mention that. I have had three fills thus far. I was banded without any restriction at all, and since have had three fills, each for 2 cc's at a time. Honk: I have tried to go that route also, but then I find myself craving non-stop. But, I do agree, this is a mind over matter thing, and my mind seems to be fighting me. Yellow rose: That might be a great suggestion! I am going to try that tomorrow, which is my day off.

Have you tried Click protein? It has espresso in it, and you can heat it. Not too hot, naturally, but it is a heatable protein.

I figured it was probably due to concerns I would be getting in more calories than I needed to, but quite honestly, I think I am eating more when I don't have one, then when I do. My upcoming appt is next week, and its with the NP, so maybe I'll bring that up to her again as well. I am also not having much restriction unless I eat too fast or don't chew enough (have 6 cc's in my 11cc band), so I may need another fill as well.

At my last appt (and fill) my dr told me to try and just eat, and avoid protein shakes. I usually have one in the morning before work, since I have to wake up so early (4:30am), and don't have much of an appetite, if at all. Then when I have my first break of the day, around 8;15-ish, I have some scrambled egg whites. He said even if it is something small like a cheese stick, I should be eating, not drinking my breakfast. Has anyone else been told this? I've been a little slow to lose, although some of that may be to not feeling the restriction, and not being on "manual restriction" until I feel it automatically, so I'm hesitant to blame the shakes...

Michelle, do you still have anything left? I can trade you for some books, and maybe movies? Let me know if there is anything in particular you are looking for, I might have it