NickiHill

Hi!! I'm gonna try to make this long story short... I started gaining weight in 4th grade and everyone thought that I would slim  up as I got older, well that didnt happen. I just kept gaining and gaining. No matter how much I  exercised, or  what diets I was on, I would lose just a little bit of weight temporarily, then gain back even more than I had lost. I have gained so much weight in the past 5 years that I am completely unhappy with me. I dont like to look in the mirror, I hate to have photos taken, I dont like shopping because I cant find nice looking clothes to fit me. I can't stand going out in a crowd and being the ONLY big person. My health has started to be affected by my weight. I notice it is harder to breathe, I get short of breath faster, my back, hips, knees, and ankles hurt all of the time. I am even uncomfortable when I sleep because of my neck fat (as I call it), which that is what it is. I am just ready to start a new life, with a new me. I want to be someone who actually likes themselves. I used to make the occasional (oh im fat like a cow) type of joke, but now when I look at my friends and family, I actually tell them in all seriousness, I AM THE SIZE OF A SMALL BABY WHALE! Their response "Did you actually look that up?" Me: "Yes, in fact, I DID" I dont want to be that depressed, down and out girl anymore. I want to feel comfortable around my friends, family and co-workers and be able to look back at the few old photos some day and be able to say "That used to be me"..........