marsvoight

Since I can remember overeating was an issue, say when I was 11yrs my step mother took me to Weight Watchers where I gained instead of lost. Having been told I am weak , tubby, fatty, two ton tessy, piggy, gluten, had cans thrown at me, at swimming park boys called me thunder thighs and laughed at me. In some form or another my obesity disease has been with me a long time and will prob be with me my whole life. Rejected by two marriages, my weight got worse and gained over 200lbs from 1st divorce. Being Italian food was pushed alot by the ol timers from the old country, they would cry if you didn't eat, mange' their prepared meals and deserts, at age 12 my stepmom brought me to Dr Zimmerman who then placed me on black beauties diet pills or speed! I was a good ballet dancer and had to lose 5lbs in order to join ballet de jeunes and go to Monaco and dance for Prince Rainier and Princess Grace. I failed. I had an opportunity to audition for a broadway show and basically had the gig, but because my self esteem was low and noone around to encourage me (not that it could have made a diff) I just didn't show up, hence no broadway.  40yrs later at present I could hardly walk over 300lbs almost 59yrs old , just got diabetes, depression and self worth inthe toilet, job on the line because of my not being able to move well, I made up my mind if I don't get 30lbs off by november 2010 I am going for the lap-band. well folks here I am 6mos post op. I am struggling with the hunger. I recently had my second fill. This has been terrible for me because I cannot hold most solid food down. I ate 2 tablespoons scrambled eggs, chewed, chewed , chewed and ate slowly. Less than an hour later I had to throw up because it was stuck. This has been going on for a week! Tomorrow I am going to have a fluroscopy to draw some cc's out of the band. Hopefully I can find a balance.
I am afraid of what I read about band slippage, stoma rupture, and permanent damage to esophagus and malnutrition. I am active in OA I like to swim and am hopeful this thing is going to get me close to my goal.
Thanks and Good Luck!
~ Marsha