Harpgirl09

At the age of 15yrs I was 72kg.
While I don't ever remember being 'fat' or overweight - I have been, for the most part of my life, very active.  Netball, Basketball, Tennis, Squash, Softball, Swimming, bike riding [even tried a triathlon once] - and going to the gym. I've been doing this since I was a kid. Cliche... I come from a family of 'Big Boned' people :(
While I've never really had an issue with being active, I have had - what I call - an addiction to food. I eat when I'm happy, I eat when I'm sad, I usually make most of my social connections around food [and alcohol] and alway have "elephant's sufficiency".
Single now; moving in and out of relationships that have not always been beneficial to my mental health, I susequently cook enough for a 'small village in Africa'... yet I still manage to eat everything that I've cooked. Bad planning? There is a blocker in my brain that will completely switch off, right at the crucial time. While I know I need to serve out a plate for me, then a few containers ready for meals during the week, I can honestly say I am able to get to the bottom of a large pan of risotto, very easily - all by myself!!!
So, aside from an insatiable appetite syndrome - along comes the curly and somewhat awkward "Big D" [depression] and a smatter of anxiety, some unpleasant other medical complaints [that are more often linked to being 'big'] and I'm a really good friend with my doctor.
I'm a Life Member of Jenny Craig weightloss - having revisited a JC office every year for the past 12years, having lost anything between 35kg & 5kg, over 10 times. I've tried Weightwatchers twice, Tony Ferguson, OptiFast, Cabbage Soup, High Protein Low Carb, Liver Cleansing, Vegeroni & cheese diet after diet after diet. I've run, swam, cycled, pressed, squatted, skipped, boxed, stepped, RPM'd & Zumba'd my 'Wobby Bits' for so many years, I've almost made a profession from some of them.
The only thing I haven't done... is lost weight and kept it off!!!
I turned 40yrs, and 4 years later, I'm the heaviest I've ever been in my life. I always wanted to have children, but now its about me wanting to feel better about myself. No amount of Psych or counselling sessions have assisted me to make the biggest change in my life... to make it to my desired weight.
So here I am...