lifeisjustbeginning2011

At my pre-op appointment today, one of the ladies in the waiting room was telling me about the gas pains traveling up to the shoulders and she said that she stood close to a wall and kind of pushed back gently a few times with her arms, then walked around a lot and it gave her some relief.

check out the thread, "samples samples samples" - there's a list of places you can call/email for small sample sizes to try out products. Some are free, some ask you to pay shipping, but well worth it. Amy

That's my rant for the evening. It's been a rough couple of weeks, but good things are coming my way. I didn't know if I should share it, but after I just wrote it, I thought it might help someone, somewhere, even if no one comments on it. I know you read it, I know some of those things happened to you. Here's to the July Bandsters - Support. Friendship. Fun! :PAmy

First, here is my attire: super loose fitting jammie bottoms, oversized t-shirt, flip flops Here's whats in my bag for same day surgery! -Driver's license, insurance card -Phone list (for the "Yes, she's alive" phone calls after surgery) -Biotene mouth spray (designed to help dry mouth and also freshen breath) - in the toothpaste aisle at Walmart -Chloroseptic throat spray (intubation discomfort) -My favorite blankie (call me Linus, but I want it next to my face when I recover) -CPAP machine (I'm told to bring it in case it is needed, but rarely is) Did I forgot anything for surgery day? Add below!

To all of those who have negatively influenced me to have this surgery (my rant). This is for you, high school bully, who I remember screaming, "Boom Baba! Boom Baba!" when I stood atop the high dive at the pool. This is for you, person in the airline seat next to me, who glared at my belly when he saw I was the person sitting next to him. This is for you, carnival attendant, who told me I was too big for the ride and made me and my friend get off. This is for you, ex-boyfriend, who broke up with me when he discovered that he could not make me skinny. This is for you, friend, who distanced herself from me when I said I didn't want to eat out so much. This is for you, insurance, who denied me. This is for you, grade school friend, for saying, "I like not being the only fat one here." This is for you, Mom, for saying, "But you have such a pretty face..." This is for you, skinny sister, who asked me why I couldn't control my eating. This is for you, friend of a friend, who said, "You can ride shotgun. You need more room." This is for you, neighbor, for asking me when I was expecting. This is for you, medical assistant, for yelling out the exam room door, "I need the bigger blood pressure cuff!" This is for you, doctor's office, for having a super small gown that barely covered half of me. This is for you, employers, for judging me because of my weight. I know you did. To all of you, you'll never read this, but in some twisted way, I thank you for your belittling comments, because without those, I'm not sure if I would be having surgery. Each comment was like a dagger in my heart. Sometimes I laughed your comments off, but I always thought about them later. Your comments made me angry enough to WANT to love myself, to WANT to change my life and to WANT to be a better person. I don't want to be skinny. I never will be. But I WILL be healthy, and I WILL find Amy, and I WILL LOVE her. Sincerely, Amy

You wouldn't be human if you weren't going through these emotions!! The last month has been a whirlwind for me - from dropping the Lap Band bomb on my mom and dad, to having surgery set and backing out a week prior because of a money hungry surgeon. I've cried when I knew I was taking bites of my favorite foods that I know aren't healthy for me and that I won't eat again. I've been proud of myself for my decision, then the same day, hung my head in shame when I looked at my life and what I've done to myself. I'm no psychologist, but I know from reading all of the posts online that this stuff is all part of the experience. Amy

Had a great pre-op appointment today. Met with the surgeon, nutritionist and also had a short seminar with four other people about pre and post op care. I should hear from the surgical center tomorrow with a time and some more information. I talked to a few people in the waiting room. One lady got dehydrated following surgery and ended up in the ER (it is super hot right now, 114 today and 115 degrees yesterday). There was another lady sitting next to me that was burping every 15 seconds (literally!). I felt so bad for her. She looked miserable. I'm guessing that she was there to have some fluid removed...but yikes! One good thing that I hadn't thought of was getting prescriptions early. I figured that I would get them when I was leaving the surgery center, but to my surprise, they were all ready for me today. One less thing to worry about - I can have them ready at home ahead of time! Woohoo! Meds are: Liquid Lortab for pain, Phenergan suppositories for nausea (yikes), Zofran for nausea, Keflex (antibiotic). See if your doc will write your scripts ahead of time!

Kim, I think the "failure is not an option" really became true when I really started to think about this surgery months ago. When I realized that I'd be self-pay, I really had to think about it. $12,500 is a lot of money. The money for the surgery came from my "new car" fund. But you know what? I can't drive a new car if I'm dead. I guess my new car will be a crappy one. Amy

Don't feel discouraged at all - everyone has a different body. Weight can change from day to day (my doc said that women can change several pounds in a DAY based on where they are in their menstrual cycles). Also, I was eating A LOT before my pre-op diet started (gained two pounds in the week before surgery). I've learned from this forum that we are all so different. Some do great on the pre-op shakes, some hate them and some don't have to drink them at all. LOL. Amy

Just remembered LAVENDER!! I love the essential oil in my bathtub, and that might be nice to have around. I'll just put a drop onto a cotton ball and pop it into a Ziplock bag. Won't be able to wear perfume or scented lotion...but that might help with any anxiety that the "hospital smell" might cause.

Wow. The emotions are really intense this morning. Woke up early with a lot of anxiety. I'm not sure that there is a minute that goes by when I'm not thinking about the surgery on Friday. I feel like I could just start crying at the drop of a hat. Anyone else getting super emotional? Deep breath....I can do this!!

I met with PCP today. Actually she's a NP, but I think of her as my doc. I called and made the appointment when I knew the surgery was on. Since my testing was all done at the center, this was the first time I saw her since we discussed the possibility of weight loss surgery months ago. I wanted to make sure that she was on board with my choice, and that she would support me, medically speaking. I know the center will take care of my weight loss related issues, but I feel more comfortable meeting with her monthly because I have other medical issues that need monitoring. She's an awesome sounding board and I feel much better going into surgery knowing that she's "got my back." Whew. Another step towards the big day on Friday. Amy

Yep, I'm just wearing home what I go in. I figure once I get there, I'll have to strip down anyway. I see your surgery is the 29th - best wishes to you!!

Here is some stuff I have ready for surgery day and the days immediately after (didn't include food or drink): Medical Stuff: Pill crusher Gas X Strips or chewables Ice packs Heating Pad Lip balm Throat spray (post intubation discomfort) Fiber chewables I also bought an oral spray called Biotene at Walmart that helps with dry mouth and is also a breath freshener - in the toothpaste aisle Hope it helps Amy

Did some serious damage at the store today!!! The only thing I forgot to buy was a pill crusher. Drat! Is there a way to upload pictures on here? Anyone know? I see that there is a place to put a link to a picture...but hmmm.....

I just got back from the store - had to buy the chewable fiber too! I got the generic fruit flavored ones that they're not too bad. I guess when you only drink liquid....you only get rid of liquid. LOL. If you would have asked me last year if today I would be drinking chocolate flavored soy Protein drinks, I would have laughed so hard!!

Ok. Nobody freak out that I've lost this much since Friday, I think this scale is W R O N G. I'll compare it with the doc office on Tuesday, but this can't be right! Ugh. Dear Scale, I hate you already. Sincerely, Me.

Maybe it is good that I live alone!! LOL. I don't have to worry about anyone cooking food around me! My diet is supposed to be all shakes, but I did buy a package of the low fat/low sodium ham. I allow myself 1 piece (they're super thin, lunchmeat style) twice a day as a snack. I just have to have something besides these damn chocolate soy shakes. I'll probably cut those out 24 hours before surgery. Amy

Holy cow....7 lbs lost in 3 days on the pre-op diet. Mercy!! I hope the scale is accurate. I'll know for sure when I go to the doc office on Tuesday for the pre-op, but I'm really curious!!

maybe try a weekday? they answered right away (within a minute) when I tried. Amy

Sure - and anyone else that wants it, just drop me an email. lifeisjustbeginning2011@yahoo.com Amy

I'm with ya, Tammy. I'm just happy that I still have all of my fingers today. I seriously wanted to eat one yesterday!! Every day is one day closer to a healthier, me though. Just trying to stay busy and keep my mind off of the fact that I can only have shakes. Amy

I made a little banner thing for us July folks....here is the link. If you'd like it, just cut and paste it on your signature page. Also, I'm not too tech savvy, but when I made it, the background was red, white and blue (for 4th of July), but when it publishes, it changes to some orangish color? Anyone know how to fix this? Or anyone want to change it at all? Amy

Sent you a message

First, let me preface by saying this: I AM AN EXTREMELY PICKY EATER. I found out yesterday on the first day of my pre-op diet that I am allergic to whey protein isolate. I felt terrible all day (headache, hives, etc) and finally ended up vomiting after the second shake. Lesson learned. Today I switched to soy (yes, totally dreading that) but I can drink it!!! I mixed soy chocolate protein shake with powdered peanut butter (small amount) and I can drink it!!! The powdered peanut butter is FRICKING DELICIOUS!!!! It tastes exactly like peanut butter, folks!!! The company is called Bell Plantation. I ordered two samples from their website ($4 total including s&h) and I just bought more. I'm a PB lover anyway, and this stuff is terrific. So....looks like I'm going to be drinking a WHOLE lot of chocolate peanut butter shakes until Friday! Chocolate soy drink is 22 grams of protein plus another gram or so for the peanut butter powder. Not too shabby!! And I'm not miserably hungry. Seriously, this is a V I C T O R Y !! Amy