Alexandra

Don't get me wrong, I don't mind compliments and even people asking me how I did it. But this was, to me, a perfect stranger; if she'd said only "you look great" to me I would have thought she was whacked. Come to think of it, maybe that's why she added the question--so I wouldn't think she was paying a stranger a compliment for no reason. But the tactless part was that she was yelling to me across the street in front of a group of other strangers! No, I don't mind that she asked. It was HOW she asked that really rubbed me the wrong way. (Of course, I don't know this woman from Eve, so I don't know what would have been a "right" way for her to ask. But yelling was NOT.IT.)

Hi Janiee, I don't think an endoscopy is a routine presurgical test, no, but a lot of doctors will require one if the patient has any symptoms of a hernia or other problems. Do you have reflux of any other digestive disorders now? If not, and there's no reason to think there's anything unusual about your esophagus, your doctor might very well not order an endoscopy. That said, what are you afraid of? You're thinking about surgery, and that's WAY more scary than an endscopy. I had one last year and really, it's not a big deal at all. Don't let that keep you back.

This problem is VERY common, and not just among obese people. What I found that helped me the most was pictures of me in groups and next to other people. Look in store windows as you walk by and compare yourself to other passers-by. I don't think it's helpful to ask others to compare you--they are seeing you through their lenses of love, or a desire not to offend, or what have you. A friend might be able to help with this, but it's the last thing I'd expect a husband to be able to handle, and I don't think it's fair to ask anyway. It's just too loaded an issue. Part of this journey, though, is seeing ourselves in a new light as we move through the world differently, and having a grasp of the "before" can add excitement as we move into the "after." Comparing ourselves to others based on weight is a lost cause, though. We are all shaped so differently and have such different densities that it's meaningless. I've met women my height who wear only one or two sizes smaller than I, but who weigh scores of pounds less. Being tall changes the equation, as does muscle mass. There's just no point in trying to draw conclusions about size vs. weight except as it relates to ourselves. Other people have their own dynamics, and theirs can't teach us anything about our own.

1. After you get banded and all healed and done with the special liquid and mushie diet can you eat regular foods? I mean I can't live without pizza forever. Yes I realise that I will have to eat healthy and it will be a different way of life but can you eat regular foods? You can eat any food you want, you just have to eat it differently. Once you have restricttion, you will never again be able to finish off a slice of pizza on five bites. But think about it: isn't that how you got here? 2. Do you have to get fills for the rest of the time you have the band on? or is it for a certain amount of time? You get adjustments for as long as they're necessary. An adjustment either increases or decreases the amount of restriction you feel, and are up to you. Most people have several adjustments in the first couple of years to increase restriction, and it seems common also to have adjustments to decrease restriction down the line for whatever reason. But it's personal and there is no definitive rule about. 3. Can you do regular exercise, especially like sit ups? Yes, absolutely. 4. I know this is depending on the person but do you have so much extra skin that you CAN'T wear a bikini? I know that sounds really shallow, but I have never been able to wear one before. This is unique to the individual. I know I would never wear a bikini, but I've had two kids in addition to losing 130 lbs. Lots of post-op people wear bikinis. 5. How long did it take for you to complete the whole process, getting approved to actually getting the band on? My situation was unique, so don't go by me. The insurance process is what's time-consuming, and that just takes as long as it takes. Once the insurer has ALL your information, they should get back with a yes or no within 30 days (usually much faster). The surgery is then arranged, and of course that all depends on your surgeon's schedule. I cant think of anymore but I think the rest I could probably ask my doctor... I just want to make sure this procedure is for me. You will think of more, don't worry. Welcome to LBT and keep asking questions!!

TOM, I'm so sorry to hear about this latest challenge! Personally, I'm of the mind that withholding information is never the best approach, but there's no reason to assume the worst or share that with Tina just yet. Let her know you've seen a doctor and they have a thought or two about what could be wrong, and you're following up with a specialist soon. Let her decide how much detail she wants/can handle right now. I know if it were my husband, I'd want to know. Nothing would hurt me worse than the thought that he was trying to "protect" me by withholding important news. But what you've got right now isn't yet news, it's speculation. There's no avoiding the full-plate syndrome. In my experience crises come in waves. But you and Tina can support one another by being gentle and honest, and not anticipating the worst when you really just don't know what's what yet. Good luck with everything, TOM. You have our full support!!

Welcome to LBT! I'm another happy Abkin patient and can tell you you're in the best of hands. Hope to meet you at a support group meeting!

Oh these are priceless. Here's mine, and of course, it has to do with a bodily function: It's the early 90s. I'm a member of a ski club with a goodly circle of new friends and had a new boyfriend to boot (DH). Nice as it was, I was the "newbie" having only been a member for a year. Everyone else had been tight for a long time. I'm living the studio basement apartment of a house owned by one of these friends. This apartment had been recently created, with a bathroom added by contractors who are also friends and members of the club. One of the contractors happened to be the most gorgeous guy--you know, the BMOC that every club has to have and the one who melts the ladies hearts when he talks to them. We'll call him Jake. So, back to the apartment: DH (remember, he's then only a new boyfriend) and I are in the shower when suddenly the drain backs up. So I called the homeowner and she called the contractors, and a day or two goes by and it's all fixed. At the next meeting of the ski club DH and I ran into Jake, the sexy gorgeous contractor, and casually asked him what the problem had been, glad of something to talk to him about. He launches right in to the plumbing report right in the middle of this very crowded room filled with my new social circle: Evidently, since the wastewater has to be pumped uphill to be removed from this below-grade apartment, it is unwise to flush used tampons. Oh. My. God. Thinking about it now makes me want to sink into the floor.

Hi Crishell, I completely know what you're talking about. I had been over 300 lbs for most of the last 25 years when I was banded three years ago. Getting below that number was earth-shattering, as was wearing sizes that start with a 1. All I can say is that you know yourself better than anyone, and you have to do what feels right to you. This is not a race, you will not let anyone down if you don't meet some external standard. You can see my stats below. While I've come a very long way, by any objective standard I am still substantially overweight. My BMI at the moment is about 31 (down from 48!!). But I'm totally happy here, and think getting to my "ideal" weight of 170 would be too weird for me. I haven't weighed that little since junior high! The beauty of the band is that it lets us control the outcome. One of the major reasons I opted against bypass was fear of the major, dramatic weight loss. I've been obese too long to think I could accept such a change happening too fast. Banding has let me control the speed of weight loss, let me take pauses when necessary and get back on the stick when I felt ready. Will I feel ready to lose more than I have? Who knows? For now I'm comfortable and want to spend time on getting in better shape through exercise, and re-concentrating on embracing small portions. But these are not means to a goal of losing more weight, they're for my health and weight maintenance. Anyway, just wanted to say yes, lots of people have been where you are now. This is a big journey and we all take it differently. Good luck to you!!

TOM, you are so right about explanations being necessary. Right here on this board it comes up again and again because doctors just issue instructions, not explanations. Why do we have to be on liquids? Why mushies for so long? Why can't I eat a steak post-op, I'm hungry!! If the doctors would just take a minute to explain the reasoning, no warnings would be necessary.

That's wonderful news, ABP, and a great first step. The endoscopy will tell you for sure if your pain is band-related or not. You're doing the right thing! Good luck in your liquids regimen and please let us know how the endoscopy goes. Fingers crossed that there's no problem!!

Actually, I've read (though I don't have time to find a citation) that the main reason McDonald's used such a dangerous temperature was that the hotter the water, the farther the coffee grounds go. Hotter coffee doesn't equal better coffee, it just lets the grounds yield more. It had nothing whatsoever to do with quality or taste. Not surprisingly.

Spam posts deleted. Ahhh, but we do. Look in the top right of every post, and you'll see the exclamation point in the triangle. That's it. Please do report any inappropriate or spamming posts you see. Thanks!!

It's time to lock this thread. Sorry we didn't get to it earlier. Please feel free to start others. And remember that personal attacks are NOT permitted, whatever the reason!!

Bingo! :clap2: The magic words are medically necessary.

Check out this thread.

I can't wait to see what Patrick Leahy says in response to this "offer." What a slimeball we have in the Oval Office!! We're supposed to buy that it's "unconstitutional" for Congress to want sworn testimony from members of the Executive Branch. WHAT??!!!??? The irony is that this particular situation seems like a small matter as compared to the intelligence failures or mismanagement of the war. But at the very first indication from this new Congress that yep, they actually want to KNOW what's going on behind closed doors at the White House, the administration blows what little is left of its cool. But it's been proven time and time again that without an oath, we can't believe a word any of the Bushies say. And even with an oath, they're willing to say what fits their agenda (like Scooter). Another day, another set of lies. Unreal.

Hey, hey, hey!! It's really gonna happen, girl! Just wait until you get that last call...you are going to plotz. Hang in there...not much longer now!!

This is almost exactly my story! My carrier was Aetna, and at the point I applied they still had the band as an exclusion and had never paid for it. The Lindstroms were very nice and interested in trying to help, but they weren't overly optimistic about my chances of winning so I decided to save my money. I continued to fight and eventually won, and yep, one of the people I called was Kelly. They were really happy to hear I had prevailed!

Sure there are. But they're advocating for the rights of ALL of us, to be more free and self-determining, and to ensure that we all get the full benefit of our Bill of Rights. They're not advocating for the "liberal" or "atheist" agenda, except insofar as it agrees with the U.S. Constitution.

Wow, is this true. But this election may bring many more people who have never examined their positions before out to the table. A guy in my office was one of them (non-religious Catholic voting straight Republican for 25 years...because his parents did, and he has this sense--based on nothing--that Republicans won't raise his property taxes), but now he's paying attention for the first time and, amazingly, doesn't yet know how he'll vote next year. I am so proud of him! For four years we've been telling him to look beyond his own backyard and just think about more than one issue before casting a vote. And though it took a national catastrophe to make it happen, there may yet be a silver lining to all this. I'll be fascinated to see what voter turnout is in November of '08.

Why does Christianity need an advocate? Truly, I'm wondering. Other groups who need advocates are those who are systematically discriminated against or who have their civil rights violated. They are people who fall into classes (such as migrant workers or uninsured children) who are not receiving their full due as citizens of this country, or who are being wronged in some other way. Then there are corporate lobbyists who are there to try to influence government to the benefit of their industries. Whatever we think about them, their motives are clear. What is the agenda for an "advocate for Christianity"? As far as Dobson goes it sure doesn't seem that it's to protect rights or alleviate harm. It's to try to influence legislation to curb the rights of other American citizens. How is that a good thing?

Oh Keith, what a painful and scary experience!! I hope you'll be fully recovered and back to 100% very soon. It's very unfortunate that this happened to you, indeed; if you're the 1 in 200 who has complications statistics don't amount to much. Of course, there is absolutely nothing anyone can do to ensure accidents don't happen. Stick with reputable, experienced providers and the chances are indeed very good that everything will go swimmingly. Sadly, nothing is absolutely guaranteed and things can go wrong. Was there any indication as to how the hole there in the first place? Surgical error or something else?

That's another excellent point. Who are the 28% who are saying they wouldn't vote for a Mormon? Very likely not liberals and atheists.

Thanks Gaynor. I just made my appointment for a barium swallow on April 5. At that point they'll probably take out all my fill, and then I'm on my own. But I'm totally convinced that having no fill is better than having just a little that causes me to reflux at night. I can't eat salad, fruit, or even much meat and I know I'm not getting the rest I need to be more active. Much as I want my intake to be governed by the band for the rest of my life, that just may not happen.

This is just not what I see going on. If Evangelicals and such are getting a bit of bad press at the moment, it's not surprising considering what their voting might hath wrought the last two elections. Can they take as good as they give? T_O_M's point is right on...all of us, Christians included, should take a step back from considering religious affiliation as a factor in suitability for public office.