PdxMan

From WebMD: What kind of calcium supplement should you take? "I tell my patients to take the kind that they tolerate best and is least expensive," Bolster says. She says she recommends calcium carbonate because "it's inexpensive, won't cause discomfort, and is a good source of calcium." Some people may have problems producing sufficient stomach acid, or may be taking medications that suppress acid production. For them, says Puzas, a calcium citrate supplement might be better because it "dissolves a little better than calcium carbonate for these people." I bolded the part the relates to us sleevers. Remember, we had 85% of our stomachs removed. We are not going to produce the amount of stomach acid *normal* people do.

No catheter here.

I just re-read my post from your quote and realized what I wanted to say at the end was, " ... and before you know it, you don't know the other person well enough to share the most basic details of your life." Meaning you barely acknowledge the other person's existence. We get so comfortable that we get too comfortable. There may be something going on in his life and he just doesn't feel he can share this with you. Here you are doing something great in your life and he is left behind in his same old rut. Grant you, he is not handling it well, but not everyone does. How about having him read this thread? It would be a great ice breaker for starting a conversation you two obviously need to have if this marriage is to survive, assuming you want it to.

I wouldn't base anything on your hunger level. The mind is a pretty tricky thing. But I am surprised you are able to eat the kinds of foods you are able to without pain at even 6 weeks. I would talk to your PCP about getting an endoscopy or get a referral to a gastrointernist to have one done. I know it is hard to fight that hunger gorilla. It used to scream in my ear. I hated it and is one of the reasons I had the surgery. I am sorry to hear it is screaming in your ear, still, but try to fight it. Continue to follow the guidelines rigorously. It may just take some time. Be sure to eat well balanced meals and avoid drinking with your meals. Just stop. Talk to your PCP or your surgeon and see if you can get scoped. BTW, I tried beef at about 12 weeks and couldn't do more than one bite it was so uncomfortable. 6 months I tried again and was fine.

WOW! Hmmm ... I don't know what to say except I am absolutely amazed that you are able to eat steak 5 weeks out? Actually ... it should be causing you a great deal of pain ... and you have pain, right? And this was on your approved list at 5 weeks out? And eating a breast of chicken 5 weeks out? I think I might know the source of your pain ... you have this pain and you go back to eating the same foods again? Uh, I think you may be dealing with some head hunger, here. There is no way you should be eating these foods 5 weeks out. Laura (or anyone else), am I off based here? Another thing ... TV dinners ... ditch them. No more of those. Oye.

At 5 weeks out, what are you eating that is dry? What does your day look like, food-wise?

Just to confirm ... you do NOT drink 15 minutes prior to eating, while you're eating or for half an hour AFTER you eat? When you eat, you start with LEAN Protein first. And again, not processed out of a box kind of thing with breading or any other junk? You are chewing well and wait in between bites evaluating how you feel, putting your utensil down after each bite? NOT eating chips and all the other gunk we used to eat?

SR, you can go to counseling without him. You may just find out that you are responsible for your own happiness. When you make a list of your ideal marriage, know that you are making a list of your future resentments. There is no ideal marriage. Anybody who tells you there is, they are blowing smoke up your skirt. You are responsible for your own life, happiness and well being. If your husband wants to participate in this, great. Fabulous. Same thing in reverse. You are not responsible for his happiness. How intimate would you say your personal lives are? Are you both able to be rigorously honest with each other? Can you reveal things about yourselves that leave you emotionally vulnerable? I have found that as time passes, it is easy to be less and less honest with each other. It just happens slowly over time and before you know it, you don't know the other person well enough to share the most intimate details of your life.

BTW, early on, I mourned food. Not being able to use food as a comfort like I was able to prior. My normal reaction was to turn to food and I was no longer getting the kind of satisfaction I had received before, so I would push it. Eating more than I should and would end up with some pain. I'm wondering if you may be experiencing some of this. If you are eating and drinking, the smaller stomach may not be digesting the food enough in the stomach. The liquid would allow it to pass through the pyloric valve early and into the intestines. This could be the cause of your discomfort, but I am not a Dr, nor do I play one on T.V. Again, I go back to the question, how well are you following the guidelines? If you are breaking the guidelines, then I am not surprised the sleeve isn't working for you.

I don't get hungry in the conventional sense, like I did pre-sleeve. I used to be a huge snacker eating anything and everything. I loved the feeling of being full ... and still do. That hasn't changed. But before, it was a giant gorilla jumping on my back screaming in my ear to EAT!! Now, it is more like the friendly nudge. But I attribute that to eating well balance meals throughout the day. Here is what my daily food intake looks like: 8:00 AM: Yogurt 9:30: banana 12:00: Soup - Chix veggie, Turkey Chili, Ham and Bean - Each well balanced with Protein and good carbs. Jelly jar size, 8 oz. Takes me about 30 minutes to eat it all. 2:00: Orange 4:30: Couple of crackers with cheese 6:00: dinner is usually a lean protein and veggies. Friday, I had BBQ ribs/Asparagus/Grilled pineapple. Saturday was Spinach salad with egg and veggies and 1 bite of chix quesadilla. Last night I had French Onion Soup and mixed green salad with lots of veggies. 8:00: Some cheating snack Crackers with cheese, maybe some ice cream. Somewhere in the day I may have a Protein Bar or shake if I get that *nudge*.

God, I know this is going to come across as harsh in written text, but please know it is not meant to be. I truly want you to be successful ... Dealing with family tragedies is just a part of life. I know I would always find reasons to abuse food. Family, work, stress ... whatever. Myself, I have had 3 surgeries since being sleeved. 2 on my back which has forced me to basically end any and all exercise until just recently. I have been out of state for funerals and many other massive life events I will not go into here, but I, too, have my reasons which make it difficult to follow the guidelines. But I am not going to let them get in the way of my resolve to follow these guidelines to be successful with the sleeve. Abusing food was an old pastime of mine. It was killing me. I had to make a change and wasn't going to let anything stand in my way. It isn't always easy, but I keep trying.

BTW, I can eat around my sleeve, no problem. I could do everything you are talking about. I could easily gain 10 pounds this April. I could drink with my meals, have caramel-latte-Starbucks-a-Grande whatever everyday. I could eat a large size DQ blizzard and suck down a strawberry lemonade with lunch and dinner. 2,000 calories ... HAH! I could eat that for Breakfast ... literally. But, I don't. I do the guidelines exactly as they were laid out for me and have been iterated on this site dozens of times. I have listened to what other successful sleevers have done and repeated. Was it easy? HELL NO! But I knew I had to change my fundamental relationship with food and I needed a tool to help me with this journey. For me, the sleeve has been that tool. Just like a saw or hammer, it is worthless just sitting there on it's own. I have to hold it and work it the right way in order for me to get the desired results. This is no different. It is hard, but there are lots of people here who can help guide you. We all want you to be successful. If we're going to make a change, then let's make a change.

I believe this is flawed thinking. Does the saw do the cutting or does the person holding the saw? It seems your expectation of the sleeve was to change you from being a mindless eating machine into a thoughtful consumer of all things good. Your surgery was on your stomach, not your head. It does require some involvement from you. The saw is sharp, but you still have to work it.

I agree with Laura. You're definitely doing something wrong if your boiled chicken is dry. You can just buy some skinless chicken breasts, toss it in a crock pot with some onions, carrots and BBQ sauce. Start it before work and when you get home, shred it with a pair of forks. Great Protein and carbs. It really is easier than you think. There is a whole sub-forum here at VST for recipes. Check it out.

The sleeve is a tool to help us with restriction. I believe the body is going to tell us it is hungry when we are deficient in some nutritional requirement. The example I use here on VST is if your body is needing some Calcium to do some repairs somewhere in your body, it is going to give you a signal to eat. If you are eating well balanced, nutritionally relevant foods, that need will be met and the signal will stop. BUT ... if you instead eat a steak or something else that doesn't meet what your body is needing, you will again get that signal to eat. "Hey! I'm still needing some calcium over here, please!" The sleeve will restrict our portions, but it does not control whether we eat nutritionally balanced meals. Especially early on. Processed foods exacerbate the problem. Ever since being sleeved I have made it a focus to eat balanced meals. Sure, I also eat a candy bar occasionally. Had one of those Snickers Ice Cream bars just yesterday. But I also had an excellent array of foods, got all my liquids and Protein in, so, I afford myself that cheat. Had I not met my nutritional requirements for the day, then I would not have had it. Does that make sense? Make sure you are getting enough Proteins, carbs, fats and minerals and I believe the 'hunger' cravings will go away.

My favorite boiled chicken method is to make Soup. I use a pressure cooker, but you can use a regular stock pot, too: Whole onion diced 4 whole carrots diced 1 full chicken in pot filled with Water to just cover it 2 tablespoons white vinegar (extracts flavor from marrow, optional) Boil on medium high for 1 hour (30 minutes in pressure cooker) Pull chicken and put in refrigerator to cool (20 minutes) Add peas, diced green Beans, asparagus ... whatever to liquid Pull chicken apart, dice it and add it back to liquid saving some out for whatever purpose you may want chicken for. Good to go I have jelly jars that I then package this into and put into freezer. I grab one on my way out to work (I have this EXACT recipe sitting in front of me right now)

Let's go with the premise that the surgery isn't flawed as the gross majority of the members here can attest it is working for them. How well would you say you are following the guidelines of not drinking with your meals, eating protein first and exercise? I know you said you can't exercise due to pain, but how about walking? You should start with something ... anything. 5 weeks out ... you should be able to do something. You say that protein foods are high in sodium and expensive. This is true if you are buying processed foods, which may also be leading to your hunger issues. You gotta stop buying processed foods. Time to make a change. Like Laura suggested, cook a chicken, make turkey chili ... time to start cooking your own food and reduce costs and sodium. This sleeve will work, but you have to work with it. It is not a miracle cure. It is a tool. You are going to have to make some changes to your routine, otherwise things will not change. Hate to sound blunt or rude, but the surgery isn't flawed ... our relationship with food is flawed.

is video which demonstrates the principles pretty well, even though it is from a bypass perspective, I have found it holds true for sleevers, too. We don't drink prior to eating because we don't want the liquid there waiting to quickly move the contents out of the stomach. We don't eat after so we can leave the contents in the stomach as long as possible. is a quick digestion 101 reminder for those who have forgotten their high school biology. I know for me, when I have overeaten, or if I need to increase my calories for an upcoming race, I could drink with my meal and consume more. I could actually feel my stomach emptying.

Wow, OP deleted profile and edited post ... ?

Excess skin is the component of my stomach butt. I won't be able to do enough crunches to resolve that, unfortunately. Love my compression shirts, though. They are my stomach-butt-b-gone.

OK, protein bars keep. It would easily take me two hours to finish one. Also, Turkey Jerky from Trader Joes was awesome. Great protein and wonderful flavor. Something with texture to "chew" on, too. Squeezy yogurts, too, work great. Do you have access to a microwave? I made different soups and froze them in jam jars. Pulled them out on my way to work. Put your yogurt in there, too and you're all set.

1 pound of fat = 3,500 calories. Did you, in the past day, consume 12 x 3,500 = 42,000 calories more than you burned? Really? I'm just going to be blunt here, sorry, no backrubs from me ... This is going to be a long journey if you really expected weight loss the day after your surgery. Are you looking to lose weight or fat? I see you have been a member here on VST since last year and have almost 400 posts. Surely you have been reading threads similar to what you have posted ... right?

I couldn't agree with this more. I think it is truly up to us how much we will lose with the sleeve. Since our stomachs don't really stretch (without some effort), we will have this tool forever. It is easy to "eat around" the sleeve. I believe by throwing away the guidelines, one can go into "maintenance" mode. I have been on this site for almost 2 years now and I can honestly say 99.9% of the folks who, after at least 1 year out, say they are unable to lose any more weight, also admit they are not following the basic guidelines. They start drinking with their meals, don't exercise and don't eat well balanced meals. Fine ... don't exercise ... but if you are drinking with meals, you will be able to eat more and if you are not eating well balanced, healthy meals, then you will be constantly hungry as you are not meeting your body's nutritional requirements. Follow the guidelines for as long as you want to lose weight and you will meet your personal goals. I guaran-frikin-tee it.