LivingFree!

Hi AmandaL and thanks for your post! And hi other interested BariPal Ont/Chino members! I really have been "on the fence" about that. Privacy for all of us is very important to me, and that's hard to find in a restaurant. I am still working on a VERY PROMISING location for our meetings with a TENTATIVE Aug 2 first meeting still a good possibility, but it's just a S-L-O-W process. I don't want anyone to feel obligated to buy any drinks at a sit-down restaurant. But, I definitely hear you, and I as well would love to have us do an initial meet-up SOON. How about this-- I will scope out a few FAST food RESTAURANTS this Sat AM and see if I can find one where we could gather in a quiet little corner (if there is such a thing) in the next week or two (maybe 7/12 or 7/19). You can expect an update post from me on Monday. Thanks again, and happy 4th of July weekend!

Hi jewelj, I agree with what the others have said--stress is so tough on our bodies, especially as you are recovering from this major weight loss surgery . But you have taken a couragous step in reaching out to friends here on BariatricPal. Like others have suggested, please give us more detail about what you are eating in your typical day so we can help. But meanwhile, as you know, the MOST IMPORTANT is to be getting your Protein (60-80g or whatever is recommended by your surgeon) and your 64 oz of water/liquid every day. And I could not agree more that taking care of yourself FIRST is what you must do in order to be able to best care for your husband. I don't mean to make that sound "so easy" because I know it is not. You really haven't had a lot of time and opportunity yet since your surgery that it takes to do all these lifestyle eating habits changes with everything else that is on your plate. And all these adjustments take time. Be gentle with yourself and keep posting here and you'll get ideas to help you learn to cope better day by day. Take care.

So sorry to hear of your MS diagnosis. I cannot offer you any help or suggestions as I am not an MS patient, but I just wanted to offer my support and hope that you get some good feedback from other sleevers who are dealing with MS. This must be such an overwhelming time in your life. Take care.

Hi washda, Thank you for taking your time to offer this suggestion. I used to attend a group at a huge assisted living complex as well and I thought those would be great places to try. Seems Sat mornings are often reserved for exercise classes! Still have one complex pending an answer, but starting to get the feeling I'm being dodged. Still trying and HAVE NOT GIVEN UP. PLEASE STAY TUNED!

Thanks for your post and your honesty. It's not something we see talked about a lot here, and it's good for all of us to be aware that too much of any behavior (even if it seems like it's a GOOD behavior) can still get us into an unhealthy place. I think it's very innocent and normal that this happens to a lot of us, but the greatest thing is that you recognized that it isn't normal and/or healthy to keep doing it and you are changing the behavior. I think part of our learning our new eating habits and lifestyle IS teaching ourselves what balance is for the first time in our life. We don't have to live in those EXTREMES any more because we can now be the ones in control of our food, not our food being in control of us. But it all takes time and practice, and being patient and kind with ourselves.

Hi CassandraChanel, Thanks for your post and for your interest in Ont/Chino Chapter! As you surely already know, this would be a very reasonable drive for you. UPDATE and Hi to all other BariatricPals interested in Ont/Chino Chapter too! Still looking for a meeting location without much luck. With the hot summer upon us I want us to be comfortable indoors, but there are fees involved for indoor meeting space. I've found somewhat private, shady locations outdoors but no restrooms, or a full sun spot with restrooms. Just not the right combination. I still do have one indoors source I'm counting on coming through for us, but the wheels of progress are moving slowly. Still hoping, tentatively, to have our first meeting Saturday morning, AUGUGST 2, 9:30-11:00. Stay tuned for more details as they become available. I will let you know the MINUTE I KNOW!

There are many people who have had weight loss surgery and chose to not change their eating habits, and regained all their weight and more. And we've heard of the celebrities who have been in the news who did just that. Ultimately, ONLY YOU can decide how you wish to conduct your weight loss surgery outcome, but I am afraid for you that you will be very disappointed in your results if you go back to your old eating habits. Sure, you will lose some weight in your first few months, but your odds of keeping it off are not good. As you know, this isn't just about losing the weight, it is also very much about your health, both right now and for the rest of your life. WLS is about planning and eating healthful meals, every day, and learning to plan occasional indulgences. We need to eat quality food, not the junk food most of us ate all the time before our surgeries. Your sleeve is there to stay. It cannot be reversed. Best of luck in whichever way you decide to handle your weight loss journey.

Here's my take on it. 50% of WLS is the operation on our stomach; the other 50% of it is our own personal accountability/responsibility and positive attitude in the willingness to change our eating habits and lifestyles for the rest of our lives. Yep, it's huge change, for sure. The difference between this and any other time you have tried to lose weight is that now you have this powerful TOOL that, although it does not just sit there and work on its own, you now have the POWER to make it do great things for you that you have NEVER had before. Yes, of course exercise is important. But you do not have to be this crazy exercising fool. But you do have to have the healthy eating habits that those of us who got into this mess in the first place just did not have our whole lives. SO THAT (learning to eat healthfully and enjoy feeding your body nourishing food) is your FIRST and BIGGEST motivator. And keep remembering that you CAN make this all FUN and not a chore. . .

JessieGirl30, I'm sorry you feel this way, and you are entitled to your feelings. No one can take them away from you. But for YOU to feel better (not for anyone else but YOU), maybe you can ask yourself WHY you really are so angry? If you've already deleted your account, you'll never see this, and I've wasted my time. But maybe you are just taking a little breather and will reconsider leaving BP after reading the supportive messages of those who have posted here before me. THIS is what Bariatric Pal is about. We ARE here to help each other. Just read past all the JUNK that makes you angry and FIND the GOOD STUFF--there is SO MUCH GOOD HERE! Good luck and continued success to you, whatever your decision.

Many people like Premier Protein ready-to-drink individual 11 oz cartons. Available at costco, Sam's Club in vanilla, chocolate, and just starting to be available in strawberry. Other locations too (some grocery stores, pharmacies carry them in smaller 4 packs, etc). 30 gm of protein, 160 cal Other people say they're too sweet. I like 'em 'cuz they're easy, quick, portable, and satisfy 30gm of protein at once!

losingsoon, Fear is sooo normal. You wouldn't be normal if you weren't feeling the fear! And that self-doubt is seeded in the many years we "tried and failed" at diet after diet, meanwhile losing more and more of our self-confidence/self-esteem/self-worth. At the same time, going into it with a positive attitude is really important too. The sleeve is a wonderful tool, but it is just that--a tool. It doesn't work on its own just because we had the operation. The tool's owner is the one who determines how well it works. And, each of us has the great power to make it work. I was exactly where you are right now. There's nothing different or special about me. Please feel free to send me a private message and I'll be glad to help answer and/or help you work through any questions/doubts you may have. or we can use email (I'll give you my address).

Hi and welcome to Sixties Forum. Good to see a new thread. I wish we could get more of us Boomers talking currently on here again. Looks like a lot must just be out enjoying life . . . Your question is kinda general so hard to target on the exact answer you're looking for, but I'll give it shot. As I am sure you know, your hunger does not magically go away "forever after" after you have been sleeved. If only---but NO. And--this experience is so different for everyone, there is no one-size-fits-all answer. The immediate post-op period of the first few months and up to 6-8 months, generally for many, is referred to as the honeymoon period where your weight is coming off somewhat effortlessly and you aren't experiencing extreme hunger or cravings like you did before surgery (assuming you are adhering to your program's recommendations, of course). From there, (again very different for everybody), the mental/emotional part of your relationship with food comes more into play. This is where your commitment to have permanently changed your eating habits and lifestyle for the rest of your life make the determination on how easy or how hard your path to long-term success will be. For that first year (for me anyhow), there was a lot of adjusting my head into telling my brain that I wasn't hungry when it thought I was. You've heard the term "head hunger?" -- our automatic reaction to our life stressors (or for just about any reason) is to go to food to satisfy/comfort/fix us. You will feel the restriction that the sleeve causes after you are well healed and back to eating regular full solids. The key is to eat slowly and chew each bit well. This is a big adjustment in itself, but it really helps keep you fuller longer. I'm 62 and 3 years out. Was obese all my life. Ate fast food for every meal for most of my life. Was very unhealthy--Type 2 diabetes, high BP (4 meds), hi Chol (2 meds). All resolved. I now use food as fuel for my body, and love eating healthfully. I don't miss the junk food, and I never, ever expected life could be so good. Do you have a surgery date yet? Good luck with your pre-op hoops. It's all worth it in the end. You'll see.

Follow back up with this center in a few days. Just keep bugging them until you have what you need. You don't want to be put on the bottom of the stack. Be sure this center is definitely willing to take you as a Medicaid patient. (Sometimes they don't like to because they don't get paid enough from Medicaid. They can make more money from patients with regular insurance.) Getting ready for the surgery will be a long process, and yes, as long as one year before you get your surgery is probably very realistic with Medicaid. But do not be discouraged by that. Given your medical conditions, you sound like a good candidate for the surgery. Your decision to look into having surgery, changing your eating habits and improving your health for the rest of your life at age 21 is the best decision you will probably ever make in your life. It takes a lot of hard work and commitment and dedication to yourself to stick to the rules of WLS that we all have to follow to be healthy and successful, but it is so worth it. No matter how tiring all the paperwork, etc gets, keep plugging away until you get into your pre-op program. The time will go fast and getting your surgery date will happen before you know it. Good luck and please keep us posted how it's going for you!

Smokey--I think that "not being good enough" is all part of the package for some of us who have struggled with obesity issues and the resulting low self-esteem that often goes with it. Nothing to be ashamed of, but definitely something to be aware of. For some of us, society has stomped down on us for so long, and we need to do some emotional work on building our self worth back up into the stars where it belongs. Your progress has been amazing, and you deserve to own that and be confident in that. Have a great appt and Celebrate the day. It is an important milestone for you!

I think the "witching hour" haunts so many of us. As feedyoureye said, and for me as well, planning my evening snack has been the key for me. Long ago now, I quit fighting it, or beating myself up for it, or thinking that "if only" I could conquer this demon, etc. It's made me feel much more in control of my choices and much less in the deprivation state of mind. With all the progess you've made, you know what you need to do to recommit to your eating plan and to spiffy back up your WLS lifestyle. For many of us (me) it's those sneaky processed starchy carbs that so innocently inch their way back into our lives. You've already taken the most important steps--recognizing that you expect better of yourself - - AND -- coming back to BP. Carry on!

I love Quest too, but sadly they're a little too steep for my budget to have very often. I use Pure Protein bars, but only allow myself a maximum of 3 a week as a snack, never as a meal replacement. You probably won't have an opportunity to do this on vacation, but wanted to share a little tip if you do continue to use them when you are home. If you cut them up into little bite size pieces (about 16) then freeze them, they make a fun summertime frozen treat to melt in your mouth. Also, watch out for the calories/carb/sugar counts on some of the different flavor ones -- the Deluxe Choc, Choc Chip, and Choc PB are all fine but some of the other ones can vary a little more than you might want to go Have a FUN vacation!

Please accept my sincere condolences in the loss of your dear husband. Although he is no longer physically beside you, he very much feels your unending love just the same. I know you want him back, but you have not lost him. He is in your heart a-l-w-a-y-s. Wishing you peace and gentle healing. For now, just feel your feelings--don't question them, don't apologize for them, just be.

Tough decision you have make, and I sure can understand why you feel so confused and frustrated! Sorry for all the stuff you've been going through. I hope you can get some answers here that will help you with your decision. This is just a general, overall statement from observations I've made after three years of personal reading and listening to people in support groups. Of course, there are undoubtedly many people who have had the LB for years with no complications. It seems though that more people, overall, have issues with their LB than those who have GB or sleeve. And it also seems that there are a lot of LB people who later end up doing a revision to either sleeve or GB. Again, this is just what I have observed. Just FYI, I've had sleeve for 3 years, never any complications, and best decision I ever made. There is some pretty good scientic data out there now on the sleeve, and it is very favorable. I think the whole "stretching sleeve" thing has become this crazy urban legend. If sleevers are following the eating plan and lifestyle, there is no such thing. Good luck to you and let us know how you're doing.

You are very welcome--my pleasure to help in any small way. Try to remember--there is no "right or wrong way" to meditate. That's what I love so much about it. It is totally personal, and spiritual, and yes--emotional freedom. I understand your "fear" but you don't really have to feel afraid. You'll know when you're ready--you've got plenty of time. You can start slowly, even just 3 or 5 minutes a day. Best wishes and keep posting and let us know how it's going for you. Peace . . .

A huge and well-deserved shout-out to you, CGJ! All that in one day would put ANYONE in big-time stress mode!!! Congrats on that great milestone for you and your son. . .

CA-Ont/Chino Leader here. Congratulations on what sounds like a wonderful day for everyone. Way to go! Would love to hear the highlights on Chapter Leaders Forum when/if you get a chance. So glad for you. . .

Are you able to get in your 64 oz Water in yet at 7 wks? It also may just be as you reach more solid foods in your eating plan you will become more regular again. But there are a lot of people who get their 64 oz in and still have the constipation problems. But keep talking with your doc until he gives you some relief. Don't suffer. What I'm going to say about coffee is controversial but, of course, it depends on what your surgeon says especially at your early stages of healing. Most WLS patients are advised to stay away from ALL COFFEE for at least a few months post-surgery. Some are advised NEVER to drink it again. I was allowed to drink decaf after about 6 weeks. I have to tell you--I have never had a constipated day in my 3 years since surgery. Okay so this is a little TMI--Like clockwork, within an hour or two after drinking just one 8 or 12 oz cup of coffee every morning, any worry about having constipation is "eliminated" (if you know what I mean!). Maybe I'm just one of the lucky ones. I never drink any MORE than that because I am cautious about too much acidity in the sleeve, and I always make sure I drink at least 12 oz of water shortly after I've had my coffee. So many different things work for different people--just wanted to share my little "secret" that works for me. I hope you find something that gives you relief SOON. Good luck. . .

There is an over the counter med that can relieve the aroma. Sorry, don't know the name--maybe you can ask your local pharmacist, or hopefully someone will post it. Good luck.

Pre-surgery, ALL of my meals, every day, were fast food. McDonalds was up there in my top 3 favs! One of my 6 things that I committed to that I would stop "cold turkey" before my surgery was to eliminate all fast food. At my 2-1/2 year point (I'm now at 3 yrs), I began to allow myself a planned fast food meal up to 4 times a month, but only from Subway or El Pollo Loco. I often don't even eat it those 4 times in a month that I do allow myself. I've had to be SUPER-STRICT with myself, though, from the very beginning of my WLS adventure, because I knew it would be too easy for me to fall back into my old habits. I am SO GLAD I was (and am) so hard on myself. It's still kinda strange to me that I do not miss all that fast food AT ALL. My blood pressure is totally normal since WLS, so I will never be willing to put that much sodium and fat back into my diet with fast food. I feel the same way about the carby junk food. If I allow it back into my life in the form of a cookie here, or a donut there, etc it is just too easy for me to start and then continue those bad habits again. I just don't trust myself to stay on the "straight and narrow" after not being able to do so for my whole life before WLS. Somehow, my crazy head has learned that eating healthy is what my body REALLY wants, and it doesn't care anymore that I don't feed it the fast food and junk. Go figure! I have found some great bari-friendly recipes that have become my substitutes for occasional snacky stuff so I never feel deprived. Life is good for me without fast food--NEVER in a million years did I ever think I would say those words!!!

Congratulations on your surgery! Yep, there's this VERY SHORT period of time right after surgery where you have to "check out" of food society while you are in your various eating stages as you heal from your operation when the rest of the world is eating all the foods you know and love. This is where you have to remember that WLS is a lot more than just the OPERATION. It is very much about ATTITUDE and PERSONAL ACCOUNTABILITY. Can I share with you the MIND GAME I played with myself to get through feeling so "different" from everyone else food-wise right after surgery? Depending on your bari program, you will be back on regular solid foods, probably within a month or six weeks. That is a BLINK in life compared to the rest of your life. If I sat there thinking about all the stuff I COULDN'T HAVE, yeah I was miserable. But in order to survive that month I had to adjust my thinking that this is JUST TEMPORARY, I CAN DO THIS, I CHOOSE TO FOLLOW MY PROGRAM SO THAT I HEAL CORRECTLY WITHOUT COMPLICATIONS--I got it made and I am well on my way to a new and greatly improved life. And I was, and I AM. And I wish the very same for you. The really important thing is to not feel ashamed or embarrassed about your emotions, because it is guaranteed that there will be many more bubbling up as you travel through this process. Discuss these things with your bariatric team. Do they have a therapist on staff? Talk with them. That's what they get paid to do. If they offer in-person support groups, go. Even if you feel that support groups "aren't your thing." You can just sit there and not say a word--you can just listen.