Hi MaryKate,
I am 57 years old and can completely relate to your story. I had my sleeve last Tuesday and was questioning my decision up until the moment I was put under. I too sort of "gave up" at about 50 years old - decided that I was tired of always thinking about my weight and dieting/not dieting - but taking it out of the forefront of my thoughts didn't really work. Every holiday, every picture, every opportunity to see old friends was another reminder that I didn't like the way I looked or felt. I continued to gain until at my highest last year, I weighed 257.
Only my adult children and my sister know about the surgery. I considered sharing it with a co-worker that went with me to the first WLS seminar but didn't because I was afraid she'd tell others. This is a personal journey for me. We never talk about being overweight so why share this? And yes, of course, I'm scared that I may fail and then what? I'm a private person and don't really want the attention that I know it would cause if everyone at work knew about the surgery.
This is Day 10 and I'm feeling a lot better, more energy, almost back to normal.