Rachel*

Hey everyone. I'm 23 years old and from Wiscosnin. Since coming to the decision of considering WLS i've been struggling on whether to do it or not. I have an appointment scheduled with a surgeon for an exam and it is creeping up upon me. Part of me is saying don't go..you can do this on your own. Which sometimes, I feel I can [do it on my own] but lately have been feeling more and more like a failure to my attempts of losing weight. I guess I look at myself as if I get WLS -I- will be a failure too. Though i've been dealing with my weight since a young age and feel like I can't experience anything in life because my weight holds me back. Tonight I sat down and wrote a pro's & con's list on my desktop and came out with exactly 10 on each side. So, I ask other people for opinions; my husband stated that when he has any doubt about something in his mind and goes ahead and does it that he turns out to regret it. I don't know what to do. Somedays i'm 100% ready to go and do it. Other days it's 1%. Is this normal? Should I be questioning whether to get this surgery done? Things that are holding me back: Fills - I'm not a huge fan of needles..knowing i'm going to have to get this done kind of freaks me out Band Slippage - I'm pretty sure I read this wasn't too common, but still terrifying to me. I like traveling out of country and it freaks me out that this could happen and I may not get the correct help I need. Not trying to sound ignorant, i'd be just be freaked out for someone to help in general if it was anyone but my doctor who did my surgery. Not being able to have carbonated beverages - Soda I could really care less about. I'm young though and still like going out and drinking beer with my friends. I'm not a fan of liqour. I did read on the forums that this does seem to vary from person to person. The thought of never being able to have a beer or chug (yes..chug, lol) a beer with friends is kind of depressing! We don't drink often...once a week at the most, but I want to be able to do these things with my friends/husband. Not being able to eat certain foods - I'm thinking this is more trial and error. To me, It's not really not being able to eat certain foods I think, it's more like, 'why should I have something in me to restrict me from eating something as simple as a sandwich.' food getting stuck - This is a HUGE one that freaks me out. Pretty self-explanatory. Excess Skin *#1 THING* FAILING - I am terrified I will get the lap band and not lose anything. How embarssing would that be? Even surgery couldn't help me.. Another thing that concerns me is that I read most only lose around 40% of their excess weight. To me it is discouraging. Have a lot of people lost more than that? To end on a happier not though--Things that encourage me to get this surgery are things like..Being healthier, Being able to travel, Going to water/theme parks, Shopping where I want, Being confident, Being active, Having a safe/enjoyable pregnancy in the future, not worrying if i'll fit in that chair, Oh and the best part? Being able to LIVE again. I really appreciate all the answers/help I can get from people. This is a really tough time for me right now deciding on what is the right thing to do. Thanks