atPeace55

I've been doing these challenges with friends on FB since the new year and I gotta say it's been a blast and so much fun to do with folks in your area or on social networks we encourage each other and keep each other accountable! Who's interested is joining in on the fun with me?!

I've been doing these challenges with friends on FB since the new year and I gotta say it's been a blast and so much fun to do with folks in your area or on social networks we encourage each other and keep each other accountable! Who's interested is joining in on the fun with me?!

This week I'll have my first consultation with my weight loss surgeon, Dr. Wes Turton. Like most of us, I've struggled with weight for most of my life. The older I get it seems the faster the weight comes on, probably due to the fact that I'm exercising less and less. When I hit menopause, the gains seemed to go into overdrive. I don't recognize myself.
 
I haven't always been morbidly obese. In fact, I was in the Army and most of the time I was within body fat limits. I was never able to meet the limits just by weight only, but always had to do the "Pinch Test" with calipers. In my minds eye, I still weigh around 150, and although I'm around 235 now at 5'4" tall, I still see myself as not that fat.
 
I feel guilty about the fact that I can't lose this weight on my own. I've tried Nutrasystem, Weight Watchers, Adkins, and even used medically supervised prescriptions such as pentermine and Ionamine. All the results were short lived, and I quickly put back on the weight plus more. Still, I feel that weight loss surgery must be for people much heavier than me. Of course, that doesn't make sense at all.
 
At this point, I look forward to getting this "tool" to help me with my weight loss. Even though I feel embarrassed at having to resort to this, I need to do it for my health. I'm pre-diabetic, have high cholesterol, low thyroid, and my knees are giving out. Diabetes runs heavily in my family and it is only a matter of time before I develop this devastating disease.
 
Wish me luck...I'm just getting started!

Highest known weight: 205
1/18 DOS 179
Week #1 171 (-8)
Week #2 167.4 (-3.6) 11.6 total
Week #3 165.8 (-1.6) 13.2 total
Week #4 163.8 (-2.0) 15.2 total
1 month 2/18 161.4 17.6 total
Week #5 161.4 (-2.4) 17.6 total
Week #6 159.6 (-1.8) 19.4 total
Week #7 157.4 (-2.2) 21.6 total
Week #8 155.2 (-2.2) 23.8 total
2 months 3/18 154.4 (-7lbs from month 1 and -24.6 total)
Week #9 152.8 (-2.4) 26.2 total
Total weight lost from highest: 52.2
Bmi: 27.9
 
I am pretty happy with my numbers so far. I don't feel like the "fat girl" so much anymore. I have decided that when I hit 150, I am going to clean out my closet. I tried on some clothes the other day and I am thrilled. As far as shorts go, the 12s are a little big and the 10s are fitting well. I am also able to fit in 1 pair of size 10 jeans, so I'm thrilled about that. I am not going to miss all the 16s and 18s that I have!
 
I also take measurements once a month, and I have lost 5.5" at my waist, 3.5" from my chest, 5.25" from my hips, 4.5" from my abdomen, 2" from my calf, 1" from my arm, and 2.75" from my thigh. I have even lost 1" in my neck. I still feel like my lower stomach is my worst problem area. Also, my legs are still huge. Of course, my boobs are shriking faster than I'd like. :-(
 
I guess I am one of the lucky ones. I can eat pretty much anything without a problem (maybe that isn't such a good thing after all. lol). I feel really good. I just haven't really had any problems. Even my scars are really looking great! I am getting tons of compliments from people saying how good I look, which is so great to hear.
 
As far as future weight loss goes, I am trying to tell myself I will be happy with 5 lbs a month. I am sure it will start to slow down now. I am actually quite surprised that I am still losing over 2lbs a week. I think I'd like to stabalize between 120-125, so that is really only about 33 more pounds to go. I would love to reach that goal at 6 months out, but that may be unrealistic. A normal bmi for me is 136, so I'll be thrilled to get there. I feel pretty confidant that I'll be there by 6 months post op. I am really excited for each phase of this. I am now it the low 150s and I can't wait to hit the 140s. It has been a VERY long time since I have been there and I'm only 3 lbs away!!
 
As far as working out goes, I have been doing okay, but I really need to step it up again. I have kind of slacked over the last few days. I'd really like to get at least 3 really intense workouts in a week.
 
That's all for now.

I'm feeling really good today. Like I've said, every day is better than the one before. I had my follow-up visit with the doctor this morning, and he's happy with how I'm progressing and how my incisions are looking. I'm down 15 lbs according to their scale, 20 according to mine. 15, 20, whatever it is, I'm on my way. I just got back from taking my daughter Chloe for a walk to the library. Felt good to get out for a walk. I walked around the block a couple times yesterday, but it was chilly and raining so not too pleasant. Much nicer out today.
 
Well, I bit the bullet and posted a note on Facebook about the surgery. I woke up at 5 am and couldn't sleep, and all I could think about was getting it off my chest. I spent the next 2 and a half hours working out what I would say. I created the note, then shared it to my wall with the following statement - "Dear friends, please read the attached note in its ENTIRETY before passing judgment. I hope for your support. Thank you, Joe"
 
Here is what the note said:
 
On Friday March 8, 2013, I had a surgery called 'vertical sleeve gastrectomy'. This is a bariatric weight loss procedure. This was not a decision that was made lightly, or hastily. I will try my best to outline my reasons for doing it, what it is, and reasons for not telling anyone.
Reasons for not telling people
First, I want to say that I was originally planning on only telling a very select few people about this. But I realize that this is probably not very realistic, as the changes will probably be pretty significant, and pretty quick. I've even outright lied to some people, including some of my coworkers and bandmates, which I am very uneasy about. I hope they will forgive me. Please don't be offended if you were not one of the people I chose to tell beforehand. My main reason for choosing not to tell people beforehand was that I didn't wish to invite any negativity, or have anyone trying to put doubts in my head as I had already made the very difficult decision and none of that would have been helpful to me. Every person I did choose to tell had the exact same comment - "you're not THAT big." I appreciate the 'compliment', and suppose I got pretty good at hiding it. Before surgery, I weighed 274 lbs. I'm sure this number will probably shock most of you, as that seems to be the universal reaction. Another comment I heard was "you could do that yourself". There have been times I've been able to shed decent amounts of weight, only to put it all back on, and then some. And each time I would do this, would make the next time even harder. I also REALLY didn't want to hear anyone say to me that I was 'taking the easy way out', as no doubt some of you reading this might be thinking right now. This would have done nothing but anger me, and would have jeopardized our friendship. Believe me, there is nothing easy about having surgery. I'm still recovering, and wouldn't ever want to relive the first 24 hours. It is still going to take hard work and exercise to get to my goal and maintain it. This is only a tool to help me achieve that goal.
What it is
There are basically three main types of weight loss surgery. There is the gastric bypass. This was never a consideration in my mind, as I view it as being a last resort for extremely overweight people, and there can be a lot of malnutrition involved. I was actually scheduled for the lap band procedure, as I know a few people who have had it done, with varying degrees of success. After hours and hours of further research, I decided against this. Basically, the lap band is a device that is implanted and placed around the entrance to the stomach. The band gets filled with saline so that it inflates and restricts how much you can eat. The 'temporary' aspect of the band (the fact that it can be removed if any issues arose), was the biggest plus to me initially. The more I read online, the more I saw people not happy with the lap band, and having it removed and getting the procedure I had, the vertical sleeve. Some issues with the band include slippage, erosion, and the long-term maintenance (you have to go periodically for 'fills' to adjust how much the band is filled). Some people just could never find what they call their 'green zone', the perfect level of restriction where they are restricting enough to lose weight but not so much that they are vomiting after 2 bites. Also, insurance concerns crossed my mind - would insurance cover the fills forever? What if I moved or had to change doctors? All of these things pointed me in the direction of the vertical sleeve. The vertical sleeve is the newest of the three types, and is basically a laparoscopic procedure where up to 85% of your stomach is removed, leaving you with a sleeve about the size of a banana. Basically, you are then restricted to eating between 3 and 5 ounces at any meal. You can eat pretty much what you did before, only MUCH less. Some people find that they don't tolerate certain foods after surgery, or don't like the tastes of some foods they liked before. It is a permanent solution. The weight loss results are comparable to the bypass, typically very good. Another benefit of this surgery is that the part of the stomach that is removed is the part that produces the hormone grehlin, the hunger hormone, so feelings of overwhelming hunger go away. People say that they go from eating extreme amounts of food and never feeling full before surgery, to having to remind themselves to eat so they can get in enough calories after. The fact that the lap band was 'temporary' and could be removed at any time, was what made it more attractive to me initially, and seemed less 'drastic'. But the more I thought about it, the more I realized that I needed a permanent solution that would help me make the lifelong changes I needed to make. Wanting something because it was reversible, enabling me to go back to the way I was, no longer made sense to me.
Reasons for getting surgery
First and foremost, I did this for my wife and kids. I don't want to leave them without a husband and father. Sure, I'm not happy with how I look, but looks were at the bottom of my list of reasons. I would have been perfectly happy to continue to eat 5-6 slices of pizza and being upset that there wasn't any more because I still didn't feel full, and watching my weight continue to rise every year. I 'know' what the right things and right amounts to eat are. But 'knowing' and being able to stick to it because you never feel satisfied are two very different things. I never smoked or drank or did any drugs. Food was my drug, and it was negatively affecting my health. Besides weighing 274 and growing, I had a BMI of 36, which is considered obese. I have high blood pressure, high cholesterol, erosive GERD (acid reflux), shortness of breath, a leaky heart valve, and what my doctor says is the second worst case of sleep apnea he's seen in his office. If you don't know, sleep apnea means you stop breathing for significant periods of time, which lowers your blood oxygen level, and the 'jarring' that occurs when your breath comes back could cause your heart to go into a deadly rhythm. So basically, I was a ticking time bomb that could die in my sleep at any time. I have a machine called a CPAP machine that helps me breathe at night, but I've tried it and find it impossible to sleep with it. I'm actually getting a new one today that my doctor says is easier because the air pressure level automatically adjusts based on what you need at any given moment, instead of being set at a fixed level that sometimes seems like too much and would wake me up.. I plan on giving it a try, and hopefully once I lose a significant amount of weight the sleep apnea will disappear. I also hope to be off my medications. Most people who get the sleeve are able to get off their medications and are cured of their sleep apnea. I've seen stories of people being cured of type-2 diabetes (which I thankfully did not have, yet) the day of surgery. Amazing. The apnea and medication for blood pressure, while being the result of being overweight, also become self perpetuating problems. They limit my energy level, which in turn limits my activity level, further adding to the obstacles to weight loss on my own.
How I'm doing
The surgery went well on Friday. The surgeon found a fairly large hiatal hernia, which he repaired while he was in there. The first day was basically Hell. I was in pain, discomfort, had a hard time taking deep breaths, and was extremely tired. All I wanted to do was sleep, not only because I was tired but because I wanted to avoid the discomfort. They pump your belly full of air during the procedure to maximize the space they have to work, and this air leads to gas pain which radiates to your left shoulder. This gas pain is no joke. Every day gets easier than the one before it. I am on a clear liquid diet for 1 week, basically limited to water or crystal light, broth, sugar free jello, and sugar free ice pops. I also need to drink protein shakes until I can start eating foods with protein. They want you to get between 60 and 80 grams of protein in every day, and if I can't get all of that in from food I will have to continue with the shakes. At first, it was very hard to get in the fluids, due to swelling. Very small sips. That is getting easier by the day. After 1 week, I progress to a few weeks of a puréed diet, eating mushy foods. A blender will be my friend for this phase. After that, I can start introducing some 'real' foods, slowly to see what I can tolerate. They still want you to concentrate on getting most of your calories from lean proteins and vegetables, limiting sugars and starches. I welcome my new relationship with food. It will no longer be something that I do for pleasure, consuming unlimited quantities. Instead it will be something that I will have to be conscious of, sometimes reminding myself to eat so that I can get in enough calories to sustain good nutrition and fuel my body. It will be a big change, for sure. I continue to feel better every day. The pain is basically gone, limited to what I would describe as a 'tightness' feeling at the incision sites. I had 7 small incisions, which should leave minimal scarring. The first step out of bed or off the couch is the hardest, because of this tightness, and my fear of twisting or stretching anything the wrong way. I'm walking well, just a bit slow at the moment. The tightness also makes it impossible to sleep on my side or stomach right now, limiting me to my back, which is the worst position for my sleep apnea. To counter this, I've found that sleeping upright on the couch with my feet up on an ottoman is the best for me. I tried piling pillows on the bed to elevate my head, but found that it was pushing my head forward, further restricting my airway. I will get my new CPAP machine today, and look forward to sleeping in bed with my wife again tonight. As of this morning, I've lost a total of 20 lbs, including 9 lbs lost during a strict one week pre-op diet.
In conclusion
I am a very private person, who doesn't like divulging personal (potentially embarrassing) information, as I've done at length here. I only just decided to write this after waking up at 5 am and not being able to fall back asleep. I hope for all of your understanding and support, and 'friendship'. I welcome any questions or comments, either under this post, or in a private message, or in person. I do not welcome any criticism or cruel comments or jokes (even lighthearted ones, as I might not view them this way). If that is your inclination, please refrain from commenting, or go ahead and remove me from your friends list. I apologize for ending this on such a down note like that, I just want to make it clear how serious I am about this. Thank you.'
So far, I've gotten all positive comments from people, except for one person. He used to be a close friend, but we grew apart in recent years, but are still friends on Facebook. It's been years since we've talked, even on Facebook. He said he was hurt that I didn't contact him, because he had weight loss surgery also and could have helped me in my decision. I had no idea he had surgery, and told him that and asked him how I would have known. We sent messages back and forth, and he still was upset, saying stuff about how he's sick of putting himself out for other people only to get nothing back (paraphrasing). I told him that I was disappointed that he chose now, a time when I'm reaching out for support and understanding, to make it about him and his hurt feelings that our friendship isn't what it used to be. Whatever, I can't worry about that now. I need to take care of myself at this point in time.

I have to share...I ran into the forum How are you doing on the emotional side of being thin..or something like that. It really made me start thinking. How did I ever get to this point in my life? O there are so many things I can sit down and list that made me unhappy and that I LET push me to over eat and eat from emotion. Let's face it, it is a roller coaster that once you get on there is no getting off without some serious help. I am a little worried about how I will handle things once I have my sleeve, but I will take it one step at a time. I hope to turn more toward lifting weights and walking. Heck maybe even running! I would love to run with my oldest daughter. She seems to really enjoy it. My middle child enjoys sprinting. What a day that will be when I can run and sprint without the worry of ending up in the hospital!
 
Last year I had started jogging and walking with the family everyday. I started getting more and more dizzy. I even had to go in the hospital for them to try to fig out what was wrong. Come to find out there are these rock like things in your inner ear that I jarred loose and out of whack! I guess it is because of being so big and running. I was getting to where I could run and keep up with the kiddos too.
 
I really enjoy this site because it gives me a chance to get a peak into the world I will hopefully be facing very soon.

Hi guys..
 
So, My doctor... Well, I started this crazy journey in September 2012. My sister had suggested I look into wsl and I really liked what I was researching. So as you can see, I chose to do the sleeve.
Well my first thought in choosing a doctor was NOT going to Mexico.. haha.. That thought had never even crossed my mind.
 
I had chosen a very nice doctor who I loved, up here in Seattle WA near where I live. He was at the Puget sound surgery center and I just fell in love with them all! Everyone from my coordinator to my doctor to the beautiful lady who's seminar I attended. I just knew that that was where I wanted to have my surgery!
 
BUT!.... This is not what happened. After doing all of my pre op testing. The sleep study screening, psychological evaluation, the blood work, EKG, upper gi etc... I lost my job... Yes my wonderful 50K a year carer just fell out from under me. All of my financing went out the window. I was back to square one. So after a few months of brooding and being pissed that my dreams were never going to come true. A friend I had made on this wonderful chat room told me about Mexico. There are actually qualified well trained wonderful doctors in Mexico that cost less than half of the price. So I started my research all over again. The "too good to believe price was the first thing I had to look into. Then I had to find the doctor that I wanted, and I had to make sure he was legit.
 
As I started looking I found Dr Ortiz at the Obesity Control Center in Tijuana Mexico. The price was right, he was legit, he had references from other patients that I had meet and he was the one I chose to go with. I am sure there are many other wonderful doctors in and around Mexico, but this is the one I chose.
 
I know I have other friends who want to know how everything goes so I will be sure to post play by play events as they happen. I totally understand wanting to know exactly what is expected and what to plan.
 
So stay tuned for more information on how everything is going
Amber

Hi guys...
 
As you are starting to see, I really like to find natural ways to help my body. I really don't like all the chemicals and unnatural things people put in and on their body's. Over the past few weeks before surgery I have wanted to start taking care of my skin. Mainly because I am worried about the loose skin thing after I start loosing weight. I am sure I can't escape it all, but I figure if I start now I can at least get a jump start on it. I can make it better than it might have been without the effort.
 
So through my research, I stumbled upon "dry skin brushing"
It is said to help with
~ Removes toxins from your body
~Tighten your skin
~Help exfoliate dead skin cells
~Help with aging
and half a dozen other benefits... I am adding a link to one of the main articles I found helpful.
 
http://www.pureinsideout.com/detox-skin-brushing.html#
 
I figure if I add this into my daily life of keeping my skin hydrated, taking skin helping vitamins and staying fully hydrated, maybe I can get some of the elasticity back in my skin.
Give it a try or at the least look into it. I know I am going to try it.
It can't hurt

Have been MIA for a while.I returned 1 day before moving house and have been unpacking and sorting out stuff since then.
 
I have lost another couple of pounds and am at 158 most days.This seems to me the perfect weight for me.I am skinny.I really look thin.Even I can see it now.No more saddle bags on legs! Stomach is flat as a pancake,boobs non exisitent even thought they hang on my knees,no butt whatsoever..lol.
 
Life is good and I have been eating a lot of junk and still losing weight.Am maybe not eating as much as I think.
 
We love love love our new house.It has a huge lap pool with a jaccuzi and a sauna.It also has a lake view.Beautiful to sit putside or run next to the lake.
 
I will be seeing physician next week as I need bloods done.I am so bruised it is unreal.My back also aches like mad if I stand.Can sit,lie down and even walk and be ok but not stand in one place.My eyes seems to be soing ok and thecoated toungue issues continues.I have taken stuff for thrush numerous times to no avail.
 
All in all life is great and I am very happy.We are taking a short seaside break in a couple of weeks so I need new bathing suite and broad shorts.The arms I cannot hide.In fact my friend told me it makes me look old,nice friend,lol!So even if I never do my boobs,legs bodylift or facelift,I will so my arms.Then no one can see that I look strange for my age..lol
 
Will post when blood results are in and on the 13th.
 
 
 
 

I'm 3 months out. I'm eating 3 to 4 oz about 4 times a day. I stop when I feel full. How much is everyone else eating? My biggest fear is that my stomach will stretch!

They say the journey of a thousand miles begins with 1 step. What they don't tell you is that the journey is a b*tch if you're on step 1!
 
1/14/2015
Well it's been a few months since I last walked. November to be exact. With the cold weather and injuries and sinus drainage, I was pretty much out of commission. We were at it hard during September and October, hitting new highs on speed, sometimes going as fast as 3.9 mph for 3 miles.
 
But November, my partner hurt his ankle and was out for 3 weeks, then I got terrible sinus headaches from breathing the smoke from neighbors burning piles of leaves and then the cold rain set in. So here it is, the middle of January and we haven't walked a mile per day. Fortunately, I've actually lost weight in that time and kept it off. My new job keeps me moving quite a bit.
 
8/26/2014
Wish there was more the report, but it's still HOT in Texas. Most days the temp is around 91 with a heat index of 101 when I walk. I've had to start wearing a water soaked towel around my neck and a hat while I walk to complete 3 miles. I've come close to heat exhaustion a few times and had to head over to the water faucet and soak my head till the dizziness clears. I thought I'd have built up a tolerance to the heat by now, but doesn't seem like that is going to happen. Good news is, the worst of the heat is over, once we hit September temps will slooooooowly creep down to the low 90's every evening. And by October, we'll be back in the 80's. I can't wait to see how fast I can do 4 miles when the temps are down in the 80's. Hopefully, I'll break the 15 minute mile. :-)
 
7/30/2014
I know I keep saying this, but OMG!!! IT'S HOT IN TEXAS! The good news is that today was a cloudy day and I managed 4.25 miles @ 3.6 mph. I should be up and above 4 mph by the time cool weather rolls in during October.
 
The heat is still in the 94 - 95 degree range with a heat index of 101 - 104. And as Madge said on the Palmolive dish-washing detergent, "You're soaking in it." :-P I'm still walking 5 days a week and hugging every inch of shade I can find! But I had to cut back to 3 miles, down from 4. I was just getting too dizzy and sick - even with using a water soaked towel to keep cool and carrying a water bottle. Monday, I had to stop at 2.5 miles and go soak my head under a water faucet. I hit a point and knew I had better get cooled off or something bad was about to happen.
 


 
7/24/2014
OMG!!! IT'S HOT IN TEXAS!
For the past week it's been between 91 and 94 degrees with a heat index of 101 - 104... during the evenings... when I'm walking! I've had to begin carrying a wet towel and carry a water bottle to prevent dehydration and heat exhaustion. But aside from that, I've managed to walk between 3 and 4 miles in about an hour, averaging 3.5 - 3.7 mph. And haven't missed a day this week. But you gotta believe it when I say I was looking for ANY excuse to skip walking after work. But alas, the weather has been clear during the evenings and all the rain has managed to miss my exercise hour. I wonder how much it would cost me to have a crop duster fly up and seed some clouds just around the time I supposed to start walking????
 
7/04/2014
Another 3 miles (including 1 mile in total of jogging in short stretches) in the record book. It still amazes me when I think back to just 18 months ago when I would go to bed wondering how much it would hurt to walk from the car to my desk at work.
 
The Texas heat is a monster and I was really dreading walking (I mean baking) in 94 degree heat with a heat index of 101. That was yesterday! But I got rained out at the last minute. :-) ****Does happy dance**** I know, I know, I should be like those workout gurus and tell you how much I missed not going out there and sweating my ass off. But I gotta be honest and say I will take any "HONEST" excuse to duck out on walking in this heat. When I say "HONEST EXCUSE" I mean just that.... a real, "believable", reason (rain, when my car had a flat 2 weeks ago, or I feel like I've been pushing myself to the point of injury or sickness). Skipping a walk just because I don't feel like it is not enough.
 
So this morning the I had planned to walk with a friend at Claiborne Park just north of Vidor, TX. We normally do 3.25 miles and I've been increasing the distance I've been jogging. But the radar shows rain headed right for us in the next hour or so. So we cancelled it.
 
Instead I ran around my neighborhood. One lap around my block is approx. 1/2 mile. 2 long sides and 2 short sides. In 70 degree weather, I managed to run 12 of the short sides for a total of 1 miles....And the amazing part was I could have done more! So we'll see how much more tomorrow when I'm back out at Claiborne.

 
 
6/29/2014
Can't believe how well my attempts to jog are working out. Averaged 3.5 mph for 3.25 miles today. I walk a figure 8 style track and managed to jog the 4 straightaways all three laps. My next goal is to jog 1 mile non-stop. Shooting to reach that goal by the end of July. If the heat gets to be too much for me, my fall back plan is to go back to wearing the 30 lb weight vest and speed walk the trails.
 
6/19/2014
Another 3.25 miles down. Speed is still slow at 3.1 mph. Temp 91 degrees. Managed to make the whole circuit on 13 swallows of water. It's a pain to have to carry a water bottle on the trail, but it beats getting heat stroke!
 
It's been tough getting used to the Texas heat. The heat's really been kicked up a notch since the end of May. I thought it was bad when the temps were in the high 80's. Oh how I long for those days. My walking partner calls me the shade hunter. He's much more tolerant of the heat. He can walk in full sun for the whole 3.25 miles, while I zigzag on the trail - going from one patch of shade to the next. I think I may actually be walking farther than him, but he carries the GPS, so I have to go by his distance and time. Doesn't matter to me though, just completing the whole trail every day is a win.
 
06/18/2014
Man is it hot! The Texas Summer heat is just getting its stride and things are baking in the park. I'm up to 3.25 miles each day/ 3.1 mph while wearing a 30 lb vest. Fastest speed without the vest was 3.6 mph for 3.25 miles. Thinking it might be time to try the couch to 5k plan. Not really sure all this effort is worth the results. It's a vicious cycle - the more I get in shape the farther/faster I have to walk to burn the same amount of calories.
 
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10/02/2013
Hit a new personal best time at the park. 3.2 miles an hour, did 3 point something miles in about 53 minutes or something close to that, I've forgotten the exact time. :-) But at least I'm getting better, both in distance and being able to recover enough to walk at the same intensity day after day. It seems like only yesterday (actually it was Jan 2nd) that I started my walking program by taking the long way around the office to the bathroom. :-P Just goes to show that taking small steps can add up to bigger things later on.
 
7/11/2013
Well, I lost Gilligan, my pedometer. I named him Gilligan cause he was my "little buddy". Not sure where he ran off to. I left the house with him on my hip and at the end of the day, he was gone.

 
So now I have Gilligan the 2nd or Gilligan the Next Generation, depending on your point of view. Gilligan II is a little smarter, so hopefully he won't get lost. He keeps track not only of my steps and mileage, but takes into account my weight, lists calories burned, total steps, aerobic steps (meaning any walking continuously for 10 minutes or more) and tells me how long I've been aerobically walking . And he remembers everything from the past 6 days.

 
The good news is that I've graduated to a 2 mile trail in a local park. It has lots of ups and downs - and the occasional rabbit/armadillo/snake/Pimp butterfly on the trail to keep things entertaining. And I'm able to make the walk 6 to 7 days a week.
 
My 1st goal was to be able to complete the 2 miles every day 6 to 7 days a week. I have reached that goal as of July.
 
The next goal is to start increasing my speed. See if I can break the 45 minute mark for completing the trail. Current best speed is 46 minutes.
 
 
5/17/2013
Finally! Made over 10k steps a day for 6 days in a row. My original goal was to do it for 5 days in a row. Plus as an added NSV, I have graduated from walking on flat, level surfaces to walking in a parking garage. I do the 1st 5k steps in the morning on level ground, but at lunch, I step it up (no pun intended) by going out to a 3 story parking garage. Having to walk up those inclines between floors add a whole new level to the phrase "pain in the butt!" :-P
 
I was walking next to a coworker yesterday and she said, "I smell smoke." I said, "That's me. I'm not just hot, I'm SMOKIN!"
 
For those out there that have feet and knee pain like me, it pays to move, no matter how little. That's how I started out 5 months ago.
 
I could barely walk from the parking lot to the store without limping and being in a lot of pain. But I always parked at the far end of the lot and minced my way into the store. And I set a goal to walk the inside perimeter of my office every time I went to the bathroom or had to leave my desk. That was 4 to 10 laps a day.
 
When we move to a bigger office in Feb. I set a goal to make 4 laps a day around the office (approximately 1200 steps plus the 500 steps from the parking lot to my desk got me up to about 1700 steps a day).
 
When I got to the point where I could tolerate the 4 laps with no lasting pain, I added 4 laps at lunch. Then 5 in the morning and 5 at lunch till I could do 10 each time. That took several months to accomplish and I usually only could do that at most 3 days a week and be in pain for the other 2 days.
 
Now 10 laps twice a day is too easy, so I changed to going into the parking garage at lunch. The inclined ramps are easy on my ankles and ups my aerobic activity. Plus it gets me out in the sun - gotta have my Vitamin D!
 
That's how I did it. Little changes add up. Now I've got 2 ladies a work who SAY they want to start walking with me - but so far it's only been talk. :-)
 

This is from today, 5/17/2013. It's gonna break my heart to reset it in the morning!
 
 
2/19/2013
Just checked my pedometer when I got home and finally crossed the 10k steps goal or 4.5 miles in 1 day.
 
I usually on get in around 2.5 to 3 miles a day, but today I had a lot of extra walking at work and for the 2nd day this week I've been able to walk additional laps around the building at lunch.
 
Hopefully my feet and hips will allow me to maintain or surpass 10k a day from now on.
 
Update:3/28/2013
Still managing to get closer to my goal of 5 miles/day, 7 days a week. I'm averaging 4.5 miles/day 4 days a week. My hips no longer hurt, just some muscle soreness. And my feet are usually only a little painful after walking but the pain is almost gone the next day.
 
The people at work are starting to take notice of my walking before work and at lunch time. Commenting on my weight loss, that may sound encouraging, but I'd rather stay unnoticed and unremarked on. Noticing my weight loss and exercising will only lead to questions - ones I'd rather not answer.
 
I've had one or two people comment on how much they need to start walking with me, almost daily, but they never seem to find the time to do even one lap around the floor with me. I never made those type of comments when I'd see people working out, cause I knew that I wasn't going to make the effort. So why try to fool them and me? If I did, it would feel like I was apologizing for being fat and feeling guilty for not exercising.
 
I didn't feel like any kind of exercise plan was going to do me any good. I was too far gone. As Ralphie May said, "This is way past a diet coke fix."
 
 
3/4/2013
I'm still walking 3 - 4 miles per day, 5 days a week, but getting past 10k steps a day is tough. My feet and hips are pretty sore the day after doing that many steps and it limits me reaching 10k more than 2 or 3 times a week. But I keep working at it. As long as I'm walking every day, I'm getting closer to my goal.

Visiting the psychiatrist was on of my pre-requs for getting Sleeve surgery. I was pretty nervous about the interview. Who wouldn't be? Knowing that the whole approval process could come to a screeching halt based on the opinion of one guy who only spends 15 - 20 minutes with me.
 
From talking to a fellow sleever, I knew that there was going to be a 500 question multiple choice questionnaire. I could tell right off that it was a personality test. The questions covered the whole gambit - from how did you feel about childhood, how do you feel about being an adult, do you have depressed thoughts, have you ever stolen anything, how do you feel about being in crowded situations ... ect.
 
The kicker is that each type of question is repeated 4 or more times throughout the questionnaire - only it's asked in a different way each time. I can only assume the point is to see if you answer the same way each time - to get your true feelings.
 
It took over an hour to complete everything.
 
The most annoying part was - THERE WERE NO TABLES!
 
Maybe it is part of the test to see how you react, but have you ever tried to hold a clipboard and mark answers with one hand and hold a list of test questions in the other????????????
 
Now this wasn't their first rodeo. They do these tests for $400 a pop. You'd think they would be a little more considerate.
 
I felt like I was Will Smith in the 1st "Men in Black." The part where all the candidates were sitting in the egg chairs trying to take a test. And Will is the only one smart or brave enough to pull the table over to his chair.
 
So I pulled the same thing. I spun one of the other chairs sideways and used the arm to hold the clip board. The other 2 poor schmucks in the room doggedly mustered on, trying to finish their questions the hard way.

For as long as I can remember I was told I was beautiful with strings. I have been struggling with weight issues since I was at least 8 years old, that is about 20 years of being chubby, fat, heavy, thick, overweight, chunky, obese, or whatever unpleasant, easy to swallow, politically correct or incorrect word you want to use for it. Not only have I struggled but my weight has gone up over the last 10 years also. So many people in my life would give me the speech - you are so pretty you are so beautiful but you would be so pretty if you only lost weight. Thanks for the boost of confidence guys. That only knocked me back like 10 steps but if only you knew. (I'll go eat a cheeseburger now to feel better)
 
I used to be an active girl, playing sports, running around, being in the mix and then laziness and knee injury kicked in at 19 years old and then another at like 24. It was so much easier to use my knee injury as an excuse. Depression happened, life slapped me in the face and I didn't want to fight back so I ate to fight myself and punish the one person who didn't deserve it... me.
 
At 25 years old I lost my job and health insurance which caused me to go without for 3 years. At that point I went back to college to save my future and earn a bachelor's degree in accounting. During this period I gained more weight. I also went on diets, excersized, and lost weight, then gained it all back. Oh the Joys of Jenny Craig and dieting in general. I remember telling myself years ago that I would never be "this fat or this big" WELL HELLO WORLD I GOT HERE!!!" When I finally graduated, got a job and had health insurance again I went to the doctor and was weighed in to find myself at 272 pounds. Man was I in shock. I almost didn't believe it.
 
Then the airplane happened. I have to travel as a requirement for work and I was on a plane and could not buckle the darn seatbelt. I had to sit with my sweat shirt covering my midsection the whole 3 hour flight because I could not buckle THE DAMN BELT!!! I was mortified. I was afraid I would be noticed. I was sweating. I was probably suspicious looking. Heck I am surprised I didn't get frisked by the on board security person. But I made it and I vowed at that moment I would do something about it. That was when my doctor recommended weight loss surgery and I found Dr. Chau and Dr. Brolin.
 
I have been on this journey so far since August, 2012 and even had to start my insurance required diet appointments all over because I missed one - SO I can't stress the importance of making sure you get your behind to every single appointment enough. My last diet appointment is on March 18th and I am counting down the days.
 
My estimated surgery date is somewhere in Mid-May and I am soooooo excited and nervous I just can't tell you!

Just a few notes on some of the changes I've noticed in myself over the last 9 weeks post-op.
 
1. I eat when I'm hungry now, don't really look forward to the "full" feeling or have a "taste" for anything in particular anymore - lovin' it. I use to get these overwhelming cravings for a certain taste (especially Whataburgers), they're gone now.
 
2. I do enjoy what I eat and sometimes I still catch myself trying to eat just one more bite, but I know I'll be feeling sick if I do. It takes time to learn the new "full" signals.
 
3. I feel satisfied and I get a small thrill seeing how little I actually eat now. Although sometimes, I catch myself trying to finish that last bite - even though I'm full. I've learned to leave it on the plate.
 
4. Once my staple line swelling went down, I was able to increase my eating to about 4oz per meal, and did start feeling more "normal" after the 2nd week, but it wasn't until about week 6 that I was back at my old energy levels.
 
5. I can eat pretty much what I want and walk away without gorging myself. I have always been able to take or leave stuff like cakes and cookies. Rice, pasta and potatoes were (I almost wrote "are") my thing. But I can easily pass up most starches now. Although pasta triggers my hunger cravings and I have to stop myself from overeating and making myself sick.
 
6. My feelings or attitudes has changed incredibly about food. Don't really care about food anymore. I have no "flavors" I desire. So I eat my own concoction of shredded grilled chicken, re-fried beans, cheese and salsa almost every meal - for the past month.
 
7. There isn't anything that I "want" to eat anymore. I am so happy with my restriction and I don't miss anything, no food cravings, nothing I miss. And there is no food that I couldn't eat at the 3rd or 4th week. It may cause some stomach upset, but if I eat it slowly, I can eat it if I want. However, I do miss being able to chug 16oz of icy cold Crystal Light.
 
8. I can still eat spicy foods (curries, peppers, etc). I eat salsa almost daily and I found this sweet/spicy dip made with Greek yogurt that I like - very warm. I find it weird that the thing that bothers my stomach the most is healthy fibrous foods, like grape skins, bananas, apple peels, and pineapple.

I found this information and I thought it was good to post it's something that some of  the long term sleevers have concerns about even some of the newbies have concerns about what if:
 
 
Weight regain after bariatric surgery can be an uncomfortable subject and one that both surgeons and patients want to avoid talking about, but can’t. To be sure, weight regain happens – the real question revolves around the cause. We understand that the choice to have weight loss surgery was a big one and the return of weight (in any amount) is disappointing. But understanding the way our bodies work and what may be behind the weight regain can help us address the issue more effectively.
 
First and foremost, don’t get down on yourself. In all likelihood, your surgery did work and you are doing the right things, but our bodies change. As our bodies change, so too do our needs.
 
Natural Regain: Some weight regain after bariatric surgery and especially gastric bypass is normal. If you regain 5-10% of your excess body weight after a few years of losing consistently, don’t fret. Speak to your surgeon, but it is likely no problem at all.
 
  Diet modification: Many of us tend to overdo it in our diets. It is tempting to over-diet, but the results can be counterproductive. Crash diets can even cause us to retain more fat than a diet of moderation. Be sure that you follow your diet plan closely and work with your dietician to ensure the very best results.
 
    Exercise habits: As with diets above, there is a fine line between good and bad exercise. Understanding the exercises to which your body responds and working with an exercise physiologist can help ensure that your exercises are doing good and not harm.
 
Pouch or stoma enlargement: The stomach pouch and/or stoma (the opening into the stomach) can in fact stretch over time. This can cause mild or significant weight regain and can be corrected with one of several simple outpatient procedures.
 
 
 
Revision Surgery can be effective, but ONLY as a last resort. Simple outpatient procedures and even major surgery can be used to revise an unsuccessful primary procedure. While revisions are generally effective, they do carry a higher risk of complications and all other solutions to the weight regain should be implemented before considering a revision procedure.

I found this information and I thought it was good to post it's something that some of  the long term sleevers have concerns about even some of the newbies have concerns about what if:
 
 
Weight regain after bariatric surgery can be an uncomfortable subject and one that both surgeons and patients want to avoid talking about, but can’t. To be sure, weight regain happens – the real question revolves around the cause. We understand that the choice to have weight loss surgery was a big one and the return of weight (in any amount) is disappointing. But understanding the way our bodies work and what may be behind the weight regain can help us address the issue more effectively.
 
First and foremost, don’t get down on yourself. In all likelihood, your surgery did work and you are doing the right things, but our bodies change. As our bodies change, so too do our needs.
 
Natural Regain: Some weight regain after bariatric surgery and especially gastric bypass is normal. If you regain 5-10% of your excess body weight after a few years of losing consistently, don’t fret. Speak to your surgeon, but it is likely no problem at all.
 
  Diet modification: Many of us tend to overdo it in our diets. It is tempting to over-diet, but the results can be counterproductive. Crash diets can even cause us to retain more fat than a diet of moderation. Be sure that you follow your diet plan closely and work with your dietician to ensure the very best results.
 
    Exercise habits: As with diets above, there is a fine line between good and bad exercise. Understanding the exercises to which your body responds and working with an exercise physiologist can help ensure that your exercises are doing good and not harm.
 
Pouch or stoma enlargement: The stomach pouch and/or stoma (the opening into the stomach) can in fact stretch over time. This can cause mild or significant weight regain and can be corrected with one of several simple outpatient procedures.
 
 
 
Revision Surgery can be effective, but ONLY as a last resort. Simple outpatient procedures and even major surgery can be used to revise an unsuccessful primary procedure. While revisions are generally effective, they do carry a higher risk of complications and all other solutions to the weight regain should be implemented before considering a revision procedure.

My official intro, you may know me as DrmBig4Evr, or Kathryn, but allow me to introduce to you The High Heeled Ninja Assasin.
 
Going through the official pre-operation phases from research to pre-authorization, approval and now finally pre-op status I have gone through a number of emotions. I know all of us have pre and post op.
 
In reflecting on this past week I realized a number of items I wanted to blog about, but didn't get around to it. This morning I realized the best way to do this is to write this blog and title it appropriately.
 
All of my life I have been known as a fighter, a fighter against adversity. Now, I realize that is not enough. Why fight adversity to gain a "normal" sense of life when I can go up against my fears, additions (food/abuse), problems full force as a ninja and break through each one and move FORWARD?? I've been living my life the wrong way.
 
A little background on my past, but this past does not define me...
 
* Teen mother
* College Graduate
* Abbusive Relationships
* Supportive Family
* Narcissistic Husband
* Overweight
* Single Mom of 2 beautiful boys, turning 11 & 18 at the most appropriate time, the weekend of my surgery
* Professional & Strong Woman
 
I have allowed the above "classifications" define who I am. I thought I was embracing adversity and overcoming it when I should have fought through it and kept moving. There are those to remind me that I am too young to have an 18 year old and to them I say simply, I know. However, I noticed that I also have appeased my biggest interloper, my ex-husband (Nov 2012), by giving into his demands and putting my life on hold as not to "rock the boat". When I decided on this journey it was mainly for quality of life puroses, medically speaking, but what I have realized I've gained is a change of a QUALITY LIFE.
 
You may be wondering about the title of my blog. Well, obviously the ninja assasin may be self-explanatory. I will overcome AND advance forward very calculated and strategically. However, the high heeled part is specific to the abuse I have received over the last 13 years of my life. The physical abuse stopped about 10 years ago, thankfully, but the emotional, financial, and manipulative ways continue on today. I have clawed my way out and I am finally seeing a light. I was told I do not look good in heels, but I LOVE wearing them. I am not too tall, but not short either. 5'5.5" with 3" heels would make me as tall as many men. Being overweight, heels made me feel pretty. I used to blame my ex for his opinions stating it was his insecurities. Typical Napoleon complex in my opinion. However, I bowed to the abusive behavior, I started buying more flats, and why not I had back problems anyway. I didn't realize how upset I was about this control until I was faced with attending a R&B concert and I "asked" if I could wear heels with my dress and I was told no, I look unnatural. WHAT???????? I wore flats and rocked them, noticing I was the only one with them on. NOW? Its time for ME. I am going in full force with my heels on assasinating any negativity and facing adversity like a Ninja!

What is protein and why is it so important? Protein is an essential part of life and it’s found in almost every part of our bodies. It makes up the enzymes that power many of the chemical reactions in the body and the important hemoglobin that carries oxygen in the blood. Appropriately, bariatric surgery or not, its classical meaning is “first importance.” Indeed, the protein heavy diet prescribed after surgery helps the body heal and regain its former strength.
 
We’ve all had a sensation of being hungry shortly after a big meal. This is usually a result of eating emptier calories in the form of sugars and saturated fats and foods low in protein. Foods that are high in protein, such as chicken, beef and most beans, slow the movement of food from the stomach into the small intestine and reduce the blood sugar spikes that can be disruptive to the continuity of our day (and eventually cause insulin secretion problems).
 
The result of eating a diet high in protein is that you will feel full sooner and stay full longer. Protein also has a secondary effect in that it forces your body to work harder to break down and digest the food you’ve eaten. This means that you’ll burn a few additional calories just by eating the right foods.
 
The benefits of eating protein after bariatric surgery are huge. Not all protein is equal though, so check to make sure that what you are eating is a “complete protein,” which means it contains all the amino acids you need.
 
So when planning meals after your surgery, make sure you have plenty of protein. You might find that you are not able to consume enough protein to satisfy your daily requirement in which case you speak to your dietitian about supplementing your diet with appropriate bariatric friendly protein shakes. No two people are the same, so stay in touch with your dietitian who will work to make sure you lose weight safely and receive the appropriate nutrition to remain healthy.

So my pound loss hasn't been that speedy as I've mentioned in my other posts, but I still have much to be grateful for. My pants are much looser...which feels good. I have more energy, and I am able to do more cardio in a day. I've also noticed that my belly is finally smaller than my boobs!!! I haven't seen this happen in almost 3 years!
 
Today I took my measurements in hopes of having a comparison for the future during my weight loss stalls.
 
I am still excited about my new journey and I am still happy about my decision.

What is protein and why is it so important? Protein is an essential part of life and it’s found in almost every part of our bodies. It makes up the enzymes that power many of the chemical reactions in the body and the important hemoglobin that carries oxygen in the blood. Appropriately, bariatric surgery or not, its classical meaning is “first importance.” Indeed, the protein heavy diet prescribed after surgery helps the body heal and regain its former strength.
 
We’ve all had a sensation of being hungry shortly after a big meal. This is usually a result of eating emptier calories in the form of sugars and saturated fats and foods low in protein. Foods that are high in protein, such as chicken, beef and most beans, slow the movement of food from the stomach into the small intestine and reduce the blood sugar spikes that can be disruptive to the continuity of our day (and eventually cause insulin secretion problems).
 
The result of eating a diet high in protein is that you will feel full sooner and stay full longer. Protein also has a secondary effect in that it forces your body to work harder to break down and digest the food you’ve eaten. This means that you’ll burn a few additional calories just by eating the right foods.
 
The benefits of eating protein after bariatric surgery are huge. Not all protein is equal though, so check to make sure that what you are eating is a “complete protein,” which means it contains all the amino acids you need.
 
So when planning meals after your surgery, make sure you have plenty of protein. You might find that you are not able to consume enough protein to satisfy your daily requirement in which case you speak to your dietitian about supplementing your diet with appropriate bariatric friendly protein shakes. No two people are the same, so stay in touch with your dietitian who will work to make sure you lose weight safely and receive the appropriate nutrition to remain healthy.

Source: Hula Cardio! Have You Tried It?

These two make my day a little lighter. Since my surgery I have had like most folks i've seen on here really bad acid reflux. I usually take a PPI - Protonics but my surgeon doesn't want me to stay on them long time he suggested that I get another GI and that I may need to have a revison to the RNY (not happening)! I continue to search for natural remedies to resolve this issue but until then these two are my "Besties"!!  

What is protein and why is it so important? Protein is an essential part of life and it’s found in almost every part of our bodies. It makes up the enzymes that power many of the chemical reactions in the body and the important hemoglobin that carries oxygen in the blood. Appropriately, bariatric surgery or not, its classical meaning is “first importance.” Indeed, the protein heavy diet prescribed after surgery helps the body heal and regain its former strength.
 
We’ve all had a sensation of being hungry shortly after a big meal. This is usually a result of eating emptier calories in the form of sugars and saturated fats and foods low in protein. Foods that are high in protein, such as chicken, beef and most beans, slow the movement of food from the stomach into the small intestine and reduce the blood sugar spikes that can be disruptive to the continuity of our day (and eventually cause insulin secretion problems).
 
The result of eating a diet high in protein is that you will feel full sooner and stay full longer. Protein also has a secondary effect in that it forces your body to work harder to break down and digest the food you’ve eaten. This means that you’ll burn a few additional calories just by eating the right foods.
 
The benefits of eating protein after bariatric surgery are huge. Not all protein is equal though, so check to make sure that what you are eating is a “complete protein,” which means it contains all the amino acids you need.
 
So when planning meals after your surgery, make sure you have plenty of protein. You might find that you are not able to consume enough protein to satisfy your daily requirement in which case you speak to your dietitian about supplementing your diet with appropriate bariatric friendly protein shakes. No two people are the same, so stay in touch with your dietitian who will work to make sure you lose weight safely and receive the appropriate nutrition to remain healthy.

So I am down to 289 lbs!!! I haven't been this weight since a year ago! I can't believe in the past 3 weeks I went from 311 to 289! That is crazy! I am very happy already that I have gone through with this. I have my one week appointment tomorrow and shall see what the doctor says!
 
I haven't even really been exercising. I have been going walking once a day, but that is more for the gas pains. I still get very exhausted doing things even just my household chores. All in all, I am very happy with my progress. Those thoughts of "what the hell did I do to myself" the first days of surgery are loooooonnngg gone.

So, as the title suggests, I am totally freaking frustrated!!! I am almost 3 weeks post op. The first week went well...I lost 10 pounds. Then I hit a stall for about a week and then a couple of days ago the scale started moving down again. I was feeling happy that I had ended my first stall and then bam I gained 2 pounds! I mean I am doing everything that I am supposed to. I use myfitnesspal religiously. I use my fit bit. I have been exercising more now than in the past year. I eat right and drink right. Intellectually, I understand what happens when we stall or gain weight for that matter when our bodies are in the process of losing weight. I've read many articles about converting glycogen, how I might be losing size and not weight, how getting smaller doesn't translate into the scale moving downward. Intellectually and logically I understand and I get it, but emotionally it is too much.
 
So since my life is about moderation and restriction now...I've decided to put the scale away and only weight once a week on Thursday mornings. I found an old tape measure and will also begin taking my measurements. Oh how I wish I took my measurements before hand...it might have saved me some heart ache.
 
Well that was in the past and now....MOVING ON. I am still on my pureed stage which is going perfectly well. Yesterday was a good day. I actually got 600 calories in, which is amazing for me! I do think I need to get more calories and carbs in everyday. It seems kind of low.
 
ON A SPECIAL NOTE. I URGE ANYONE THAT IS PRE-OP OR JUST BEGINNING TO TAKE BEFORE PICTURES. I KNOW IT IS DIFFICULT TO SEE YOURSELF ON A PHOTO, BUT DO IT!!! ALSO, TAKE YOUR MEASUREMENTS SO WHEN YOU HIT THOSE STALLS YOU CAN AT LEAST GET SOME PEACE OF MIND BY MEASURING YOURSELF.
 
I TOOK BEFORE PHOTOS (WHICH I HAVEN'T POSTED YET BECAUSE I WANT A COMPARISON PHOTO), BUT I SOOOOOO WISH I HAD TAKEN MY MEASUREMENTS.
 
IT WILL BE HARD TO FACE THOSE NUMBERS, BUT WHEN YOU ARE LOSING YOU WILL BE SOOOOO HAPPY YOU DID.