Lee4love1

Really...I've answered that question over and over again to myself. I know what Love is. Plus ot the other person--I am not limiting myself to any one race. I am an ex-Army soldier and I've dated--Black, White, Asian and Hispanic Women. I set my eyes out in the world without limiting my heart. If I meet some one of a different race than Asian--why not get aquainted? I asked this question because of the very same small minded comments on some person saying I am "Buying" the Woman. Like I said before--we're still going strong with that same tradition here in the USA. If I could take a survey on some of the Women I've met from the time I was grown at age 19 until age 50 I am today--I would be rich with so much cash if I could collect $1,000 a person who wondered---"what was my salary" or "where did I work? I even wore my Postal Uniform a time ago--It was a dollar night in a club--when I used to go. I had the uniform on--but I had a new one--without the words that said-"Post Office". I tried to make conversation--the first thing I got---that I was a factory worker and she was not interested. I even used to play mind games--when a Lady asked me where I worked...I'd say--either 7-11 or Stop n Go. I got some of the strangest looks and responses. My point is this--no matter where go in America--we're confronted with $$$ issue. We have the same type of people here trying to get ahead--with another persons sweat or 'wallet". Trust me--I never intended this to be all Women. But with the ones I've encountered--the $$ signs in many eyes point to that conclusion. What's wrong with wanting a certain type of Woman? Here's a secret...I worked with a quite a few Filipino Men and Women. I ate lunch with them, worked side by side with them. Most of them were just as you said--hard working. Now on the other hand--I got made fun of when I worked hard by my own peers. I am a Black Man and some of my so called peers cracked Jokes and made fun of me--because I voluntered for many over-time hours. "Man you're killing yourself"..."Why do you need to work 7 days a week? So with that in mind--I know how I am now. I am no longer working at the Post Office as a mail-handler. But I am fully aware of how people work--especially the Filipino People. I want a Woman who don't mind working hard like me. Before I go--I am a single Father of 2 boys--ages 11 and 9. Do you think taking care of them is easy work? I am an early retiree due a back condition. But--who knew--my new 7 year occupation has me still working hard at many things? Plus--I don't have that luxury of a ex-wife or Mom who gets them every other weekend. That has never happened in the past 7 years and I am afraid--it will not happen. Getting married to a different race---it's totally my choice...

You are sooo wrong. If keep updated on your laws. A Law about that very thing went into effect "March 16th-2006". In the first month--Over 10,000 marriages were turned down for Visa's to the USA. Many of the Men are sooo upset--oh well. If I have to pay for a wife--then my thought of getting one is over. The law now prohibits that.You're investigated--asked when did you meet--where did you meet? Did you pay for an address and more...That is why so many marriages are turned down. The bill was written into law by Lady Congresswomen--who knew a lot of Men were doing just that. So with this--thought. I am not a business Man or a rich Man. PLus--I know a lot of Filipino Women who live in the states. I was speaking about both subjects. So why would I have to buy a lady who lives 2 miles away? OK--lets go the marriage and dating ritual here...We meet a Woman--we take her on a date--who pays? We go on many dates--who pays? We buy the ring--who pays?? It's about a big lump sum of cash placed on the Man....so let's not lose focus here. What about a Man who is making--maybe $85,000 a year--but he meets this Woman who only a secretary earning -19,000 to maybe $25,000. Would she be less fortunate and would be trying to make a better life--if she married this Man? Come on Come on---get real

Hey...like the young folks say--"I'm feeling you--deep". People do that--they focus on your weight and make the deal what kind of person you are.When your weight has absolutely 0% of who you are.Now sometimes as we get smaller in our program now--we hear it from all kinds of folks. Sometimes from people who actually don't know you at all. Like I said in my last communication--I see the strange looks, I feel the eyes on me. I am not that important. But I was looking as I was pregnant with twins. But I am a Man who is now 50. So I am loving the fact that--I can walk and talk to certain people. They actually treat me different. I am shocked as I said--that some of the nicer Women--nicer looking want to talk to me...I was so shocked at how motivation and libido has been up. Almost like i am 32 again...Ranting is ok. We got to get it out somehow. Either here or to another person. I think you are doing the right thing--putting it on here

Why am I fat??? I loved beer back in the Army, loved the cakes, the fried chicken, pork chops and more. I used to love McDonalds and other fast food chains. Then I was starting to have issues of"Low Thyroid"--but having intense hunger. This is also a problem among my family Members. People don't know the fatter we are--we get that mental thought--eat more--eat more--even though we're not hungry. Partially it's a Bovine Growth Hormone in all of our meats, chemicals we can't pronounce in all of our foods--pesticides on many of the veggies we consume. The lap was ingenious to come out as the weight loss tool. I love it--and I am using it now as a great tool for me. There are days now when hunger is not even in my vocabulary. I now love fish, veggies and yogurt--some of the things I used to hate. I see something I've never saw before in my life. Jealousy is one. I am astounded over the many People who look at me strange--but will not speak(when they used to). I am shocked over a few who said--"You're using drugs aren't you? I said yes--the mind drug call confidence. Many feel it's a "crack" thing--since it's all they know. Then there is me just turning 50 and having women age 21 to 29 notice me and say--"age is just a number"...I am sure 70 pounds ago--that would not have come out of their mouths. Two years ago--I had reached the max weight of 315 and I was so shocked over the treatment I got. I went down--but couldn't get past 220. With the old methods of weight loss...I gained back 53 pounds in just over 18 months. I was fed up in November 2006 after the Thanksgiving holidays and Christmas. I called and left messages on many places(hospital Bariatric programs). So I got back a call I made to the St. Francis Hospital (Memphis,TN) and almost flew to that place to get evaluated. Now after getting banded on 3/28/07. I am happy to know I am headed in the right direction. All that has been said--negatively--I don't care. I am thinking of my Job that I have now. It's being a good Parent and hopefully I will see my kids grown and have their own children..Hey--we are fat for all sorts of reasons. We have to look in the mirror and get honest within ourselves. I retired early in 1998. I was heavy then too---not knowing my back got worse as the weight went up. I had to put on disability. I am so sure--I am going to beat a lot of this. So far--with my motivation high--back pains are rare. I hope I don't have to have any more pain shots in my back. It's never been my favorite thing. Lord willing--I can reach that 163 within the 12 months I have set up for myself. My plan--keep the band for life...:whoo::clap2:

To add what you're seeing. I think it'smore about accepting yourself as the "New and Improved" person. Sometimes I get compliments on how much weight I lossed--but I am only 1/3 of the way there. When I am asked about how much I'll lose. I get a shocked remark--"Why so much? I am 5'9 and I am supposed to be 163 lbs too. I am hoping that I can look in the mirror and see my collar bones too. I still see a fat guy even though I am 235 or lighter. I started at 273. I can't weight to see that 1 as the first number. It will make me feel accomplished as a person. The lap band is a tool for all of us. I am just like any other human--we skip sometimes--eat the wrong food, I have had the days when i said--Ok...I had that cake last night--even though it was tiny. I lower my calorie intact the next day.Like I'm doing today--but still eating(small). We have to get to that acceptance thing within us. If I adjusted my weight to 150--that is me as a 17, 18 and 19 year old. I would wonder how I will accept that. Many will think all sorts of things--but who cares. All we are seeking here is some sort of "Longevity". Hoping that less weight equal less desease, less hassles with clothes--shopping at the normal stores. Buying the normal foods, getting acceptance into a society that thinks "Thin"--but with over 50% of the nation now over-weight or fat...sad--but you are doing GREAT...Don't doubt it...

Hey everyone...I don't want to sound crazy. But I wake up every morning to a pain I have been missing for a long time. Let me give you a hint--I am a Man. I am feeling many days like I was at 35 to 40. I just made fifty (50) and all I think of is sex. Sounds crazy--because my Doctor told me...Your sex drive is not going to return. You will just lose the weight and that's it. After almost 40 pounds--it's feeling strange each night and many mornings waking up with a stiff one. I thought I was done when I got up to 273 pounds. I felt miserable and with a low sex drive. Mind you--I don't have a GF--but with some of the things I have been thinking--I am going to get back in the swing of things--really soon. Sonebody has been lying to me---maybe I am imagining this--you think?? Tell me--Ladies and Men--are getting a certain feeling as the weight drops??:cry:clap2:

There you go--Fatboyslim...I feel you. I got banded March-28th. I am down to 235 from my high of 273. I am a former Brooklynite. I lived in the "Bed-Stuy"area and in the "Bushwick"area before I left many years ago for the Army. Most of my brothers and sisters still remain there. They are all big too.Two of my brothers are just about at deaths door. One has went over 400 and theother is slightly over 300. My brother who is soon to be 48 this month--said I was mean to him to ask him to think of losing weight. He feels that him tipping the scales at 400 plus--is no big deal (he has diabetes and hypertention). The brother who is going to 47 later this year and is over 300--again he takes the same attitude. (2 heart attacks, diabetes, arthiritis and gout). I am the oldest brother at age 50. I am told--I think I am special. Yes--I am special to my 2 little kids I am raising alone. I'm a Single Parent and they like me like this(losing weight). Kids have a way of telling the truth--always. So keep up the good work. It's essential you avoid the pit falls of this deadly desease. My Grand Dad died 15 days before my oldest son was born-11 years ago. My dad passed away August of 2000. Bith was from "Diabetes Complications". So you now know-what I am dealing with.....Peace

I can't wait until I can honestly write here--that I lost my 107 pounds. So far I am 1/3 the way..I can't wait to pass for thin. My goal is to look like I did when I was 30 to 32 years of age. I guess those was the years I was at my best.- I was about 170 to 178 Pounds--nice 33 inch waist and plenty of energy

Hey...I am a guy and understand you. I have been banded since March 28 and down now--35 pounds. My clothes are starting to look crazy too. My jean shorts are baggy as all outdoors. But with me--they can be loose--since guys wear them loose and big. I had to buy a stretch belt though---I get them to feel right. I hope that you try harder to lose. I know it can be tough for many of us to lose. I was doing crazy things in April---riding my bike 2 times daily and lost 10 pounds in 2 weeks. No joke--then the weight dipped to the that 1.5 to 2.5 each week. So with the slow down--I averaged 2.75 so far now for 15 weeks...Oh yes--I am keeping track of this thing. Many of my so called friends ask--what's wrong with my clothes. Then the ones who chose to say nothing--Just look at me strangely. One lady said the craziest thing. She asked me--was I using drugs? Like the crack cociane. Have you heard it all?? I guess we can't lose weight unless a drug is involved...hahahahaha

:whoo:Hello Mississippi Bandsters...Have any of you adjusted your exercise schedules--due to the hot weather we've had of late?:help: I took off 10 days and was sorry for all of that. Because today my body felt ok--but I felt the tired legs after going on my short course of 2.5 miles. I hope the ones who can exercise after work--outdoors--you wait until 6:30 to 7 PM to let the heat die down. I am back at it--funny how my neighbors who doesn't have the band wanted to ride with me. So I asked my sons to let them ride their bikes. Oh well--I am 50 and I rode with two single Moms--23 and 24. I can't brag--but they had a tough time. I will have to get back to the riding. I have to go back to my "Hill of Pain". Yes I have a hill that I can do--but the pain--oh well time to get back...We all fall off...I did--but I am back...:faint:

Have you Men or Ladies heard any of the good compliments come your way? Maybe we have a story or two about how people have started to notice you--the real you...:whoo:

Ohhhh...I am so cool with what I am doing now.I looked up many results, read articles and done my correct research priot to the getting myself banded. Iam fully aware of this being a tool. I have many things I do to lose weight.Only in the summer now--I can't go to the gym. I live in a small town--without a day care.I am a single Parent--so the bike riding is helping me. I have not rode in like 4 days--but I am going back to that in the am. I am getting up at 5 am now. I am going to push the limits. If the kids are asleep--I can ride about 1 hour--right in my neighborhood. My kids wake at 9:30 to 10. So it is not a big deal. Don't worry--I am not expecting magical powers from the "Lap Band".I know that I must push it hard and push it good to get any results. I am good to go with things. I started at 273--I am now at about 235--I am not sad or discouraged at all. I just feel good that I have the means to do better than I ever did. I like eating little meals now. I actually didn't like Total or Special K or even yogurt much until I got closer to the surgery.Now I eat loads of that stuff. Catfish, Drum and a few other fish dishes are my best meals now. Some evenings when I am hungry and I am tired of eating fish, tired of yogurt--I look for a small bowl of Total, Special K or "Honey Bunches of Oats". I saw that they have only 180 calories with milk...That is sooo better than eating a "Big Mac" or something that holds 500 or more calories that I used to eat. I love going to McDonalds withj my kids and I have the apples and nuts with yogurt in the morning. It was never enough. But now I have kids who who are 11 and 9--who can out eat me anytime now. I now say--the food is for them. I buy my fish, and other foods that are light for me. All it takes it discipline. I can be honest--I am right at about 90%--that 10% needs to be worked on...

I guess I am doing ok--since I just made 50 on 6-21. But I have been doing very well. I lost the 35 already since March-28. I will have see what is going to become of the weight loss. I have just got my second fill on June 13th... I think my sweet spot will be a possible .5 to .6 cc's to be my sweet spot. That is my thought. I am not the Doctor--but i think if I can get to the 2 pounds week---I will be ok...My weight loss slowed down to 1 pound a week--but--it's averaged out to now 2.6.....

Hello again Bansters all over. Do you have some stories you'd like to share about people around you-who's shown their jealous streak? I mean--saying snide remarks, crazy talking of how you aint all that or whatever? I am a Man and I would have never thought--other Men would say the silliest things. Now here I am 50 years old (6-21) and hearing guys around me--laugh and all that. I started riding my bike 4 to 5 days a week around here--as long as the weather has been not too hot. I got bit by a dog on week two and I hear--"You should have not riding that bike--stupid-! One guy who is the maintinance Man tells me--"Hey Lee--what you think you doing? "You can't turn back the hands of time--no matter what you do-! "Hey, you're killing yourself--are you ready to stop riding now? Funny--you know who told me this? My sons 5th grade teacher when I showed up to the "field day"with my helmet and gloves--and yes--bike". I rode a long time--now at 11 weeks of riding. I finally got my next door neigbors to ask--"Can I ride with you,Lee? I said--well where are your bikes? I let them ride my kids bikes--since we all have the same size bikes. After 2 days--they quit. After 1 week--I hear the ladies boyfriend who lives behind me say--"Man you aint slick, you are trying to steal my Woman-!....Funny--hos Woman is a size 18 to 20 and I was never interested in her. Her and the other neighbor is 23 and 24 year old Women--who quit atfer 2 days. Saying--they are not used ot riding 2-1/2 to 5 miles a day. The young Man who is about 26--said at first--"You need to ride with your big a**". Then at the same time--he is saying,'Hey Dude--I see you losing all the weight--what's up with that? People are so silly and will say anything to show their real feelings masked. All I want is to be in shape and avoid a lot of the deseases that some of us "Black Men" get after age 40... Give me your stories--maybe we'll strike up sopmething really funny here...:faint::heh::clap2:

We all were once overweight or Obese ,severely Obese.... If you had your eyes on a person (male or female)--but they ignored you--badly. But all of sudden--there has been some new interest cropping up. You know--smiles, winks and walking up and talking suddenly. Would you give them the time of day now? :faint:

This may be a hard question for me to answer--Because it's not true. At least--I have no idea about it or know about it... Have you noticed anyone who is head over hills about you now--since losing--30, 50, 75 or more? This is for the Women and us Men:clap2:

hahahahaha...yes--maybe you should get some smaller shirts. I still like the bigger shirts myself--but not for long. I am sure--if you wear some smaller clothing--you may pick up on a few compliments. I have and I am now wearing a few of my old suits. Funny thing...I brought 9 suits over a small period of time--2 are still new--never did alterations. The other seven now can be worn. I have done that for the past 2 sundays to church. I have had a few of the older ladies--lol say--"You look good"...Makes me wonder--will I be dating the 60's age group soon?? Anyway--don't worry--it'll all work out

My Mom may have started to have some anger issues possibly.A couple of my Brothers have said--they are saying as little as possible to her these days. I told her--I went on a date with a woman 29--she acted like I has sold some US secrets to the Russians...That was like 8 months back... Maybe it's jealousy--maybe it's something else--only God knows..

Have you noticed younger folks checking you out? (Men) A Lady of 10 years or younger giving you the eye? (Women) A Man who is 10 years of younger giving you the eye? I wondered--since I am now 50 and it's been lot of conversations with ladies much younger than myself....

I'm feeling you.But I just turned age 50 and I seem to have many friends--age 25 to 30 now. I never had many buddies in this age group.Maybe because many of the guys and ladies--aren't so nice about compliments. Well in your case of being 25--this discussion won't be to your liking... But--maybe some of us older guys and gals will appreaciate the looks or flirts from younger folks...

Let me share this story with you Stacy.... In 2002--I tried marriage again. I met a Woman in church and I was head over hills with her. Getting to the sad part--I was a Gym fanatic and didnt know much about my meals and how to do them and eat right. So my weight loss was so small. So after feeling defeated in 2004--I saw that the medicare insurance had made "Obesity" a desease. That'swhen I first considered the lap band. I called up a few Doctors--got opinions. Then my weight was a yoyo thing. This month--I was 260....next month--240 and so on...Anyway--you would expect the love of your life--your spouse to support you. I got excepted and was about to start my tests and so on. My wife at the time told me..."Why are you doing this? I said because I can't seem to maintain the weight and I need releif. She said...you can have that surgery--but you will be at the hospital all alone. I will not come there to see you or pick you up.The lap band is killing people. I told her--it's the bypass that has the high risk. She ignored me and like the Man I "was"--I stopped what I was doing. I worked out and got down to 218. Oh yes--fit andtrim--but guess what?? Sick as he**. I had lose too much--too fast and too much muscle. I gained it all back with interest. The reason I was given of why she "really"didn't support me...My dear wife said she needed to keep me fat--she knew that other Women would want me if I got smaller. The on top of it all--she would call me sick, poor and a few other names when we were in the privacy of our bedroom.Our walls were paper thin. My kids--asked me---"Daddy why is "Miss Phyllis mad at you for losing weight? My kids now are only 11 and 9...I am a single dad--thank God she is not their Mom. Then one day--I saw her ex-husband...I am asking--God please forgive me....This Man was all of 500 pounds--at least. My wife (now ex-wife) was all of a size 8 during 2004. Something strange hit her in 2005---called age 40. She went to a size 10, 12, 14, 16 and after we split--a big 18 to 20. Yes--just like that. Her old habit of sleeping right after a meal caught up to her...She went to the Doctor and cried about having a thyroid problem and would he start her on thyroid meds...he refused. Then she tried this pill and that pill for that magical cure...I still even though I was having issues--I stayed exercising and never stopped until the Hurricane(Katrina). I moved and decided--273 wasn't my deal...Again now that I am in the 238 area...I am thankful again for the lapband. My dream is to visit a few friends down on the gulf coast--maybe Christmas or Jan-08. It will be a shock them all--at who I am...

Hey--I am feeling you all. I have gotten that already and I am only down maybe 33 to 35 pounds. I have not checked my weight lately. I know that my clothes now hang on me too. Some of my shorts slide off of me when riding my bike--thank God I wear the biker chorts under-neath..lol Oh I see and hear of the jealousy. Sad because the ones who can do the same--refuses to do it. I have heard some of lamest excuses ever. My brother- who is 48 this month---told me, "he is fat because he is trying to make sure his casket is full upon his death". He is sitting on about 410 pounds right now. Even his wife cracks jokes about how he lifts weights--only weight is in his spoon. My brother who is 45--he says--he's now is considering the surgery. He's a big Man at 5'11"--maybe 350...But I hope he'll do the d*** thing too. My Mom--Lord help her. I called and talked with her--I could have sworn she talked to me with some type of attitude. She says--"You don't need to tell me about this lapband"--"Two Ladies on my job has had it and I know all about it"--strange--she then says--why you need to do this? Then the last thing--You should get it taken out after you lose enough"..I let her know--If It can stay in me for 30 years--it will remain inside...She asked again--why? Guess what? My Mom has not called me since early May. I knew she was mad. She's told me--except who you are--all of us are fat..why do you need to change?

Mine came from a young lady who I met first when I moved to my town---"you're new here? "How long have you been here? I met this lady like October 24-2005 and she thought I was someone else..I am thankful for the lap band. It's making me have to buy new clothes. But I am going to wait--6 more months--if i can hold on that long....Oh yes--I felt good when a 22 year old Woman said I looked marvelous...Oh well--I just made 50...

I gotta learn how to get me a scale too...the one that shows my weight loss and the BMI

I've tried it baked, fried. chicken soup too...Nothing makes me feel good about eating it again...I am gonna settle with catfish and many other fishes that are easily baked....