Weight Loss Surgery: Full-Time Position or Hobby?
If you saw that employment ad, would you apply for the job? Most of us would probably be curious…but that business about no vacation days and no days off may lead us to say, “No, thanks!” What if the job opening was for…MARRIAGE? Let's say you would be applying to be a wife or husband? Would you take the job?
What if the job opening was for PARENTHOOD? You'd be applying to be a mother or father. Would you sign on the dotted line?
Those two "jobs," spouse and parent - fit the job description above. You don't get days off from being a mom, dad or spouse - not if you want to be a really good parent or want your relationship to be healthy. You have to show up every day -- whether you feel like it or not.
In 2007, Cari (the Post Op of A Post Op & A Doc) accepted a position that was neither spouse nor parent (although she also held both of those positions). Her new job had the same requirements: 24/7, 365 days a year. Her new position was as a WLS post-op living a life in Recovery From Obesity. Oh, she didn't know it at the time, but living healthy is a full-time job. The benefits have been incredible for her – being able to enjoy improved health, wear cuter (and less expensive) clothes, enjoy activities she couldn’t when carrying excess weight (biking, hiking, and kayaking to name a few), being able to travel with ease, and enjoying an improved self-esteem leading to a more enjoyable work and social life.
Those benefits come with responsibilities, because being healthy is a JOB. Being healthy doesn't just happen. You have to show up and do the work. You don't get to "take a break" because you're tired and you don't get to play hookey or take sick days. If you're sick, you still need to take care of yourself.
Are you treating your obesity like a full-time job, or a hobby?
Recovery From Obesity is a full-time job. What sort of performance evaluation would you give yourself? How would a real-life employer deal with you if you weren’t performing the job duties you signed up for when you accepted the job?
Most employers would give you a warning and expect you to improve your efforts and performance in order to secure your position. If you continued to put forth minimal effort and consequently didn’t meet even minimal performance criteria, you’d eventually be fired.
When you made the decision to have weight loss surgery, you were made aware of the requirements for keeping your weight off: eating healthy foods in healthy portions, drinking lots of water, and getting exercise on a regular basis, to name a few.
If you’re not following through with the job criteria you accepted when you decided to have weight loss surgery, who’s going to give you a warning? Maybe the doctor or nutritionist – if you attend your follow-up appointments. If you continue to treat your weight loss surgery like a part-time position or hobby, the benefits won’t be part of the package. But who can fire you?
A better option than quitting is to go after that great benefit package the job of healthy living offers and get some ON-THE-JOB TRAINING. Get to support groups, make an appointment with your nutritionist, get into therapy, find a mentor who lives a healthy lifestyle, and commit to your job/yourself. In order to perform better on your job, you need solid instruction on healthy living, eating and thinking.
This on-the-job instruction requires a whole lot more than a single visit to a nutritionist, a stopover at a support group meeting, a session with a surgeon and a 1-hour psych-eval. Yeah. A LOT MORE.
It might take a solid year or more of working with a life coach or personal trainer. It might take regular attendance at 12-Step meetings. It might take annual attendance at educational conferences, targeted toward living fully in Recovery From Obesity. It might take 3-5 years of therapy (we vote "highly likely" on this one)…Heck, It might take ALL of these things, and more.
THINK ABOUT IT: In the past, most obese people did a horrible job of managing a healthy weight. In fact, an employer would have fired The Post-Op (Cari) after moments of observing her on the job, based on how she took care of her health when she was at her highest weight. The idea that anyone would magically and immediately be able to perform the job of taking good care of their health simply by having weight loss surgery seems a bit…far-fetched. Don't you think?
To live fully in Recovery From Obesity, people need regular and ongoing ON-THE-JOB TRAINING. If you want a certificate suitable for framing or perhaps a 90-Day chip from OA, and a smiley face on your lab results as rewards for your efforts – go for it! Positive reinforcement… in non-edible forms!
Recovery From Obesity is a full-time position that requires ON-THE-JOB TRAINING for a long, long time. Understand that the benefits are the result of your very own effort and investment (of both time and money). What sorts of "training" programs are you involved with aiding your "job performance" in Recovery From Obesity?
A Post Op & A Doc have a copy of the Gotta Do ‘Em’s (and a lot more free handouts for you) on our website and on our Facebook page.
Very awesome way to look at this journey. Definitely enjoyed reading this post. Thanks
I liked this article - true words.
I think that one thing people don't seem to fully realize is that for the formerly obese, you have to strive harder than someone who was never obese. We need less food, regain easier etc. It is not that you suddenly have the metabolic system of someone who was never obese.
My doc put it like this "you still have the disease of obesity even though the main symptom, excess weight, is currently under very good control" That kinda gives you something to think about....
Wonderful article…thanks!
I realize every day that my WLS is a full-time job on top of the full-time job I have as a mom, wife and teacher. But I am worth it and I will work at whatever support I need to continue to learn and change and grow and SUCCEED!
2muchfun 8,927
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What a clever way of looking at our illness!! I'll be bookmarking this topic for future reference. We see many people who come here who are years out of surgery and are unhappy they've had to compromise their lives while seeking to be healthy. And so many have failed simply because they treated WLS as a part-time job.
tmf
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