Why Do We Do What We Do When We Know What We Know?
Just after Easter, I posted this photo of my morning ‘snack’ of carrots, celery jelly beans and chocolate eggs with a caption, “Does this make sense to anyone?” The responses were funny, truthful, and understanding. Some quickly identified the beans and eggs as protein and together with the carrots and celery some said that made a very healthy snack! Others noted that there were so few, it didn’t matter. One commented, “Living on the edge – just don’t overdo it!” Yes, I laughed out loud.
And don’t we all have times when we live on the edge, test fate, and throw caution to the wind? I suppose we do. I just always wonder why. Why do we do what we do, when we know what we know? For myself, sugar is a real challenge for me and something I need to avoid (see Sugar Free Me! article) Yet, still I ate the jelly beans and chocolate eggs on a plate with vegetables, as if that would make it ok, or that the vegetables would counter act the sugar. Yeah, right. Knowing that so many can relate, I thought I would give a shot at perhaps a few reasons why I think we do what we do when we know what we know.
We Want To Feel Normal – Sometimes we simply don’t’ want to have to worry about it! We are under the impression that eating whatever one wants is ‘normal.’ It might appear that our thin friends and relatives can, but it always comes down to calories in- calories out; for everyone! We are normal and like most people will always need to be careful and mindful about our choices, but sometimes, we just want our actions to have no consequences. (But they do)
Others Do It. In support groups, sometimes patients share how they are able to get away with eating “forbidden foods” and how they are still doing great with their weight loss. Well, more often than not I have found that these people are either ‘honeymooners’ or their metabolism is different than mine or they are great exercisers. Eating what others eat hasn’t worked well for most of us. We each need to know for ourselves EXACTLY what our own bodies need – and what works and what doesn’t work for us to maintain our weight loss goals.
Reckless Abandon – My favorite definition of reckless abandon is: “to abandon all sense of responsibility or consequence.” Sometimes we do because we are either too busy to pay attention, or too stressed to care. It is unfortunate that all too often our lives are out of control and when we are too busy, we put ourselves last! The commitment we have made to ourselves must be strong enough to endure ‘come what may’ we must stay focused on our Success Habits. No matter what! It is too easy to get out of control and off track and find ourselves somewhere we swore we would never be again.
A Little Won’t Hurt – That may be true for some but honestly, this is one of my greatest challenges. Some people can do just a little, but for others like me, have trouble stopping at just a little. It’s not that I binge eat or eat too much at once, it’s just that once I have a little, my body starts to crave more, and more and soon I am a slave to my food choices day after day. For me, a little does hurt.
Will I make the choice to eat jelly beans & chocolate again? Absolutely! Will I enjoy it? Yes! Will I stop, and get back to my routine habits as soon as possible? Yes! Why? Because I know what I know.
Colleen M. Cook
In 2009 she was named “Bariatric Professional of the Year” by the Bariatric Care Network, and recently received International honors for her research.
Colleen is a sought after speaker for both bariatric patient events and professional conferences. She is the former host of the radio show, “Obesity’s Surgical Solution”. She is the author of the internationally acclaimed, bariatric best seller, The Success Habits of Weight Loss Surgery Patients The Success Habits resources are used in bariatric facilities throughout the world, helping patients learn and live these important principles for a lifetime of success.
Follow her at colleencook.com or contact her at cmcook59@gmail.com or 801-898-4212" rel="external nofollow">801-898-4212
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So true! Thank for your comments. These thoughts do go far beyond food choices, don't they? Life can be so challenging. I am grateful for supportive friends and family. Makes me want to be a better support to others who struggle no matter what the self defeating behavior.
Colleen
I loved this article! It gave me a chuckle and a sense that I am not alone. Do you know how many times I have asked myself "Why did I just do that?", knowing exactly what all I know??!! Every single diet I ever tried had one of those moments... I am only 3 months out so I am still on the more strict side. However it pleases me to see others out there are leading a life of somewhat "normal" eating behavior and getting right back on track. This is extra encouragement for me. Thank you! 
No matter what our issue is we all struggle with self defeating behaviors its true. We know what we know and we do know better, but somehow we call into the same trap over and over again. In many ways I think we keep repeating in an effort to not just learn but to understand and integrate the changes we are trying to make into our lives.
So many of our behaviors have been ingrained over the course of years and years many from the time of infancy, making a change to those behaviors simply because we know better is not something that can be done over night.
On the surface we see and recognize the changes that we need/want to make and yet it will take us time to dig down deep and get to the root cause of those behaviors to fully change them and integrate the changes into the grooves we have made.
It’s not an easy process, and no matter what the course is that we are trying to shift we must be persistent and consistent with ourselves to make it a reality. We will try and fail and try and fail and fail again; the point is to keep on trying. To keep the chocolate eggs and jelly Beans on the plate with the vegetables to remind us that we are changing, to remind us that we want to change. That as we acknowledge the past and we acknowledge the deficit, and today we may fall into it tomorrow we will come back and fill it up with veggies. For every bite of chocolate we will come back with a healthy choice and keep coming back again with our new choice until we no longer need to fill that void with sugar to help the medicine go down.
Much easier said than done, but well worth it, to achieve the change you desire.
No matter what our issue is we all struggle with self defeating behaviors its true. We know what we know and we do know better, but somehow we call into the same trap over and over again. In many ways I think we keep repeating in an effort to not just learn but to understand and integrate the changes we are trying to make into our lives.
So many of our behaviors have been ingrained over the course of years and years many from the time of infancy, making a change to those behaviors simply because we know better is not something that can be done over night.
On the surface we see and recognize the changes that we need/want to make and yet it will take us time to dig down deep and get to the root cause of those behaviors to fully change them and integrate the changes into the grooves we have made.
It’s not an easy process, and no matter what the course is that we are trying to shift we must be persistent and consistent with ourselves to make it a reality. We will try and fail and try and fail and fail again; the point is to keep on trying. To keep the chocolate eggs and jelly Beans on the plate with the vegetables to remind us that we are changing, to remind us that we want to change. That as we acknowledge the past and we acknowledge the deficit, and today we may fall into it tomorrow we will come back and fill it up with veggies. For every bite of chocolate we will come back with a healthy choice and keep coming back again with our new choice until we no longer need to fill that void with sugar to help the medicine go down.
Much easier said than done, but well worth it, to achieve the change you desire.
Thank you for these great comments. What valuable insight! You know, I am nearly 20 years post op and still learning, growing and making better choices for myself each day!
I loved this article! It gave me a chuckle and a sense that I am not alone. Do you know how many times I have asked myself "Why did I just do that?", knowing exactly what all I know??!! Every single diet I ever tried had one of those moments... I am only 3 months out so I am still on the more strict side. However it pleases me to see others out there are leading a life of somewhat "normal" eating behavior and getting right back on track. This is extra encouragement for me. Thank you!
Thanks for your comments, So glad you found this helpful. I am nearly 20 years post op - and still learning to make good choices consistently. All my best!
toomuchrose 47
Posted
I loved this post. Human behavior is inexplicable sometimes. Why does my friend with COPD still smoke? And also complain about her breathing problems? It goes beyond eating; most of us repeat counter productive behaviors despite vowing to stop.
I read a meditation during Lent which cited a Bible passage that asked the same question, so 2000 years ago people were pondering the same problem and not much has changed since. The heart wants what the heart wants, I guess, and the head can't always sucessfully stop it.
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