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Omg i have gained and lost weight so many times in my life to include a really big chunk with the sleeve 3.5 years ago and I understand completely what you mean. It’s like I am still the SAME EXACT PERSON that I always have been on the inside!! It’s almost like when someone dies and you feel guilty enjoying something without them. I feel like if I fully accept a compliment I am letting my overweight self down somehow because they deserved all the same compliments but never got them. At the same time you feel guilty for not just accepting it because someone is trying to be nice after all. But the male attention differential is almost too much. I realize over and over again just how invisible I am when I am overweight. Surprisingly women are actually this way too if you pay attention. And what’s worse is once you lose a lot of weight and start to look really hot, some Women start to treat you differently again. The women will find you a threat and the men will assume your a beyotch. I guess we have to look good but not too good to deserve respect and consideration in todays society. I have said it over and over again. Life is a fashion show. I honestly don’t think this will change in our lifetimes.

Walking around the lake with my dog yesterday, I noticed that my feet kept sliding around in my sneakers. I had to stop and tighten them as far as they go -- and now they're serviceable, but I can still feel areas where they certainly don't fit right anymore.

Ooof. I am exhausted. I'm one week into the pre-op diet and anything and everything that I do makes me super tired and weak. Walk tot he bathroom - exhausted. Walk from car to office - weak and exhausted and out of breath. I know it's the very low calorie diet (VLCD) that I'm on and my body getting used to the changes, but DANG this is crazy! Has anyone else experienced this on their pre-op diet or am I having extra issues because I'm a binge eater?

Exactly. And then my mind goes to "Oh, I KNOW why I didn't deserve the compliments when I was bigger. I wasn't THEIR idea of pretty or fashionable or sexy or anything THEY liked looking at". As if I liked what I saw when I looked in the mirror.....

Today’s win for me was getting a little higher on my spirometer. I am exactly a week post op and still not to where my doctor would like me to be but I am doing a little better today. Still working at it.

My aunt is from York, as well!!!!! She's lived here in the States for 30 years full time and 50% of the time for about 15 years, so she doesn't say stone or any of that any more (still says flat instead of apartment and pronounces H as haytch OMG WHYYYYY), but her accent is still so thick, and she has so many funny things she says that I gave up trying to figure out YEARS ago lol

well that's good! hahah being sick will prohibit you from doing it again hopefully lol I gave in one time and grazed all day, still tracked and ate 1900 calories. Way more than I have ever ever ever ate, even though I grazed on fruit, sugar free candy, popsicles, yasso poppables, I didnt even eat crappy foods so that's disappointing hahaha but I did learn that I cannot graze but I never feel full. That will be how I gain my weight so I need to make sure I sit and eat my food in one sitting.

@SleeveToBypass2023 It is so hard isn't it Like, you know that people are just trying to be nice and genuine, but part of you can't help but question why and ask why you didn't deserve the same compliments when you were bigger. Such a battle mentally!!

okay now I definitely am crying 😭

I understand wanting to see what actual size you are! I've been holding off for several reasons: 1. I really hate trying on clothes whether I'm fat or not ..I've never enjoyed clothes shopping. 2. I just purchase online sometimes medium (more often) sometimes large. I'm not sure what that converts to in numbered sizes and 3. Like you, I don't want to spend a lot on clothes only to have to get more later! So yeah, I understand..but I can tell by your excitement it might be worth it to give it a try! Congratulations, you're doing so amazingly well! You've got this!!