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So we are at the middle of the week - how are we all doing? What is something that has gone well so far/or something that you are looking forward to? Anything you'd like to learn from/improve on? My week has been okay so far! I have a driving lesson and then I am getting my hair cut, which I am in desperate need of as my fringe is in my eyes 🤦‍♂️ I am trying to increase the amount I am eating, which is proving difficult, but I'll get there! I also start with a personal trainer tomorrow which I am excited about!

So I'm in the liquid phase, post op surgery and am a little over a week in and I miss food. I understand attachments to food is what got me here, but is it really wrong to miss food? I spoke with my therapist this morning and she said to be careful not to glamorize food. I'm not sure how to think about this. I told her I still want to enjoy food, or get enjoyment out of food later on. Am I wrong to feel this way? I understand it's more about fueling our bodies and of course I want the right foods to keep improving my health. But are we expected to never enjoy food again after bariatric surgery????? thoughts?? thanks

Bought a slow cooker and this is its first outing: beef cheeks. Two huge 400+g (almost a pound) each cheeks. Had to cut them into quarters after a couple of hours (and they were more tender) otherwise they still would’ve been cooking today. 😉 Forgot the mushrooms so added them a couple of hours in. Supposed to blend the stock & vegetables & simmer to reduce for a gravy but I couldn’t be bothered last night when it was ready. I’ll freeze several portions for future meals.

I can't express how much I truly appreciate the honest and careful feedback from all of you... I DO want to change, and I know exactly what I'm doing to myself. NICKELCHIP you are an angel and reading your response touched my soul...leaving me pretty speechless at the moment. I do feel very alone in my journey and It's ok, but sometimes it would be nice having someone in my life who can understand the depth of my journey and what it really means to be a supportive person. I'm not asking or expecting of it, and I'm very grateful to have come across a lot of genuine and kind people on this website. Having some reassurance and affirmation DOES go a long way though. I think therapy and speaking with my team is my best option at this point. Group therapy will help with accountability and having people around who understand. It's just the act of actually doing it. LOL As NickelChip said in her response about being comfortable in failure...I felt that. Seems when I do something good for myself, I give up on continuing it. Or sabotage it completely. Thank you ALL again SO much ❤️

Hello All- i posted for the first time just about three years ago with some anxieties as a spouse with my wife prepping to undergo the gastric sleeve. I originally noted being concerned about our lifestyle changes, relationship impacts (I had heard all the horror stories) and most of all health concerns into the future. The community was incredibly supportive and I had learned tips and useful knowledge that helped me coach and support my wife through it. I am happy to say we are better than we ever have been and her self confidence is through the roof. However the MAIN reason the surgery ever was even considered was to get her diabetes that started while she was pregnant with our first child and got very concerning bad with our fourth has still stuck around and caused issues….. First- this is Life changing not just for the partner getting the surgery, but the spouse too. We used to be foodies and that all had to go out the door. Same with alcohol. Two bites and you are full, a pint and you are drunk. So activities, dates, etc. and new hobbies should all be prepared for well in advance. Luckily we are both athletes and coaches and this allowed to have an outlet that wasn’t our prior foodies and beer/ brewery culture pastime. Two- Relationship, anyone who tells you that this leads to automatic divorce/ break up is paranoid or lying. Out of her support group offered by our health network, I think only 1 or 2 of about fifteen women ended up separating and that was from the other spouse cheating. I have to say that in many ways, after four kids and all our activities, youth sports and coaching- it created a second honeymoon period for us and really strengthened our romance and relationship because we both focused on our health again jointly and the magnetism increased dramatically. Third- It might not fix the problem…. We did not jointly go into the surgery for cosmetic or weight loss reasons. It was the diabetes and the doctors said it was a solid shot to cure or mitigate the disease. It was for a while, but it keeps back up. despite healthy eating, despite exercise and coaching, despite the surgery- medications came back into the picture and so did the celebrity weight loss drug (which is really supposed to be for diabetes…) This has been keeping everything under control but is a case of the cure being as bad as the sickness. The side effects are brutal and definitely have a quality of life impact, but we both want to live to see grandkids someday….. Fourth- dysmorphia is VERY really. We are both naturally larger people. I was a lineman in high school and college and she was a softball catcher in high school and college and ended up also playing women’s rugby there as well. Even with the surgery she went from an XL to L but she got her college/ high school figure back and as such her confidence went through the roof and started dressing like she hadn’t in years. With the medication though??? Her figure, face shape, everything changed. Down to a Small or Medium. For almost a year and a half she hasn’t recognized herself in the mirror. It’s a double wham with the surgery and the medication. Between her best friends and myself (we have all been in the same friend/ team group since college) the support was to have fun with it and go with the flow. Instead of worrying about it (the dysmorphia) it was embrace the change. All new clothes she could never wear before, she’s been a redhead now and then blonde and still is. Cut her hair shorter, started wearing makeup (never really did)- all just to try and put a positive spin on it. I’ve been the spoiled recipient of having a brand new girl (don’t think I haven’t romanced and spoiled the you-know-what out of her), but at the end of the day it’s been mitigation of all the life changes. The last part has been the most detailed because it’s the most recent and to me has been the most impactful- NOT having the surgery do its intended purpose and the dysmorphia we’re both very difficult given the efforts and life changes made. We’ve done everything we can to make lemonade out of those lemons though. We had an anniversary vacation better than our honeymoon this past summer (she has always been way out of my league and these days it’s very much over the top- I feel incredibly spoiled) and we have made time to ride our bikes together with our oldest babysitting the kids and we come to each others games when we coach. I would tell any spouse; husband or wife of someone who is going to have the surgery and then or also do all the meds: 1. Support. It’s a huge deal and you need to show up. 2. Don’t get insecure about your relationship because of the surgery. If you are worried it means you might not have a great relationship to start with…. 3. You will need to change your life too. Because of my size and my weight lifting, I need a lot of protein and calories. I will never look like a Hollywood star (like she now does) and always an NFL lineman- BUT- if I bring a cannoli, pie or a full growler into the house in addition to steak/ salmon, etc it’s teasing and not fair. You will need to learn self control to support your spouse… 4. Inspire and come up with ideas for positive re-enforcement. If the dysmorphia or depression sets in, you need to find fun things to do, supportive steps to take and positive angles to keep things going. 5. If you are doing all this as a spouse, what about YOU??? Are you going to die a martyr? Take care of YOURSELF too. I go lifting 3 times a week, go fishing in season. And for my 40th birthday when she asked what I wanted?? I got us a long weekend on the Cape, bought her some dresses I wanted to see her in and sent her to get her hair, nails, toes, eyelashes, etc.. done. Said I wanted a long weekend with my movie star wife. It was a great time, kid free and continued to strengthen our marriage. Anyways- why am I writing this? Posterity? Self reflection? Not really…. I just want to give Spouses a roadmap. It’s a huge change and you need to navigate the waters well. If you do you will benefit as much as your loved one. Good luck.

I think you should consider listening to your provider. If you are trying to change your relationship with food, try to follow through with the steps/plans you create to do this. It is probably very hard but I hope you are successful.

Congratulations !!!!

Oh OP please update your stats! No idea what surgery you had or when so no idea what advice to give about the gain. Sounds an amazing time. Big PSB fan here too. I saw them many years ago supporting Take That in Manchester. Glad you had fun. 🤩

never tried egg white powder but what about egg whites? Like in a carton? I eat those every single day. I get a 6pack at Costco in cartons and they last me about a month.

I’m drawing a line under last week and moving swiftly on! Emotions were all over the place, pains were getting to unbearable levels and eating sensibly went by the by. 2.5lbs up on my lowest (it could have been so much worse 😮) Just putting it down to experience and carrying on. My clothing is fitting better and I’ve managed to wear a ring that I’ve not been able to get on my finger for quite some time so the NSV are continuing, which are all positives. Hope everyone has a great start to their week 🙂 Onwards and Downwards!