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I love when I get compliments from people that don't know the "presurgery" me. The other day a guy was hitting on me at the carwash. The conversation eventually got around to age. He guessed my age but was off by 24 yrs! I asked him how he came up with that age since I was wearing sunglasses and a mask. He said, "Well, you are so tiny and you look like you take care of yourself. You have great abs and no body fat." I said, "Maybe I just have a really good plastic surgeon!" He said, "No, you don't look like the plastic surgery type." I thought to myself, well I guess I won't tell you I just had a lower body lift and brachioplasty in August. And no, I didn't give him my number.

What a great story. We all know how a random comment has the power to crush us but we forget how the right comment can be so empowering to someone’s self esteem. I have two. The day someone said: you really are tiny aren’t you. And the day someone said: there’s plenty of room for you to sit here. I never though I’de ever hear anyone say those things to me before I lost the weight.

A co-worker of mine who hadn't seen me since a few months before my surgery (she was on LOA and came back when I was on LOA lol) kept staring at me when I went into work to pick something up and she looked so confused lol. I went up to her and said hello and it was nice to see her again and she was like "OMG! I thought maybe you had another sister and I just hadn't known and I didn't know what to say if I was wrong" I laughed and said that no I just had the one sister I just had lost about 150 pounds (at that time) and she told me that she'd heard I'd had weight loss surgery but she'd only been back 2 months at that time (after being on LOA for 10.5 months) and she thought maybe I'd just recently had it (this was in August) and then she proceeded to tell me how thin I looked (I was in an xl in shirts and 18 in pants at the time, I'm in 14's right now and large tops) and that was the biggest compliment to me. I mean, a lot of people tell me I look good, but being told I look thin in any way shape or form just made my day (I used to wear 6xl tops and 32 pants, to put things into perspective). She gathered a few of my other co-workers that I hadn't seen in ages and they were all gushing about my weight loss and I felt great! I have a bit of body dysmorphia and still often times see the big girl I used to be when I look in the mirror so the compliments make me realize that what I see isn't necessarily what IS.

Uber driver who hasn’t seen me in a year pulls up to my house Driver: Do you live here with the other lady? Is she your sister? Me: Um, no? You don’t know my sister Driver: I used to pick another lady up here all the time Me: Yeah that was me Driver: 😳

This is my first post, although I've been lurking here for a while. I will figure out my signature and update. I have read a lot of threads with folks talking about telling or not telling friends, family, co-workers about their decision to have surgery. Everyone's decision is unique to them I believe and I respect that. Maybe someday I will feel differently than I do now. I have chosen not to reveal it to others aside from two close friends that I knew would be supportive and my husband and children. My father wants to come and visit later this week and he has not been told. There are a lot of reasons, but mostly the reason is that he will share it with others that I do not want to know. I can ask him and he can say he won't tell anyone, but he will share. We've been down this road before. I am almost 5 weeks out from surgery and doing well. Since he last saw me, I weigh 42 pounds less than I did. It is very noticeable and I really need to buy almost a complete set of clothes at this point. It is one thing to say "I'm eating better and exercising" which is true, but he will be staying with us in our house. I cannot conceal from him how little I am eating or that I am not eating the same things he is. I have racked my brain, but cannot figure what to say to him. I REALLY don't want him to know. I am struggling anyway because he sprung this on me last night and wants to come later this week. I am not ready for the company really. I have loved having the surgery during the Covid bubble and having lots of time to adjust. I love my Dad but he expects me to cook like Mom did when she was alive and to entertain him, and I am still getting used to my new stomach and all I need to do. But I feel bad saying no. He is my Dad and you never know when you will see someone the last time. Thank you for your opinions and help. Has anyone else dealt with someone staying with you that didn't know?

Meh...Old, Shmold. Alot of us are probably fitter than we have ever been in our adult lives! P.S. if your avatar is any indication, you look great. AND happy! ❤️

I am loving this post! Just puts a chuckle in the day! I am presently in the process. First consultation on Thursday!

You can’t predict how much loose skin you’ll end up with but you can guarantee you’ll have some. I feel like I’ve earned my loose skin. And, for good or bad, a part of me thinks I deserve it too - I put on the weight & stretched out my skin. No one else did it to me or made me do it. I don’t have a lot of sagging skin but it’s there. It doesn’t really hinder anything I wear. I never wore a bikini when I was slim & younger so there’s no way I would now so no loss. I also have no desire to wear shorty shorts or mini skirts so no one will see the saggy bits on my inner thighs. And to hide my bat wings, I just don’t wave my arms in the air & don’t wear anything very strappy or strapless. Honestly, I had minimal pain after surgery. By day 4, I didn’t need any pain meds & I didn’t have any gas pain at all. My only problem was my back which went into spasm on day 2 but it really didn’t have anything to do with the surgery as such. I had quite a bit of swelling which caused me difficulty swallowing to begin but it was gone by day 4. I had no trouble sleeping on my side from day 1 & healed very well. But we’re all different. You can’t predict how you’ll respond to the surgery. Just be realistic & be aware of the possible side effects, but don’t let something that may not happen or is easily managed scare you from having the surgery. Stress is never good for healing or recovery. Good luck with your surgery & on your journey.

I was in ketosis for about the first two-three months post-op. There was no way to get in all the protein I needed with eating a more balanced diet. It was not by choice. My diet is more balanced now that I can eat more, and I am out of ketosis. I agree completely with @Arabesque. Your body goes pretty haywire the first few months after surgery. Your hormones get out of whack. One of my liver enzymes was high at my first lab check 2-3 months out, but my surgeon was not worried about it, so I didn’t worry either (I am also a nurse). I also get the lightheaded wobbles frequently. It usually happens when I make quick moves or go from sitting to standing. I “run” into walls and have to catch myself. I am pretty sure it is orthostatic blood pressure changes. It is a good idea to discuss your concerns with your surgeon. They can let you know if what is going on with you is “normal” after weight loss surgery and help you fix anything “abnormal.” Good luck!

Hi there. For me it was the other way around - I really wanted the bypass but my care team determined that it was medically contraindicated for me. I tried hard to change their minds but in the end I went with their recommendation. I was disappointed, but it turned out okay, I didn't have any major complications and the surgery has been effective so far. However, in my case, there was an actual medical reason why the bypass was extra-risky for me. I got a 2nd opinion and the 2nd doctor agreed it was contraindicated. In your case, it sounds like the surgeon just feels the bypass will be more effective? If there is no medical contraindication, it seems like after being told the pros and cons, you would be allowed to choose the surgery you want. What would happen if you just said, "Look, I understand your reasoning, but I'm not comfortable with the bypass. I want the sleeve."? Would he refuse to do it? Could you get a 2nd opinion? Maybe if another doctor indicates that the sleeve is a viable option for you, your surgeon will relent. Have you shared your concerns about the bypass with your surgeon? Maybe with more information, you'll be more comfortable with it? In any case, it doesn't seem right for you to be forced into a surgery you're not sure you want. You're the one who has to live with it, so you should be calling the shots (assuming there's no medical issue preventing the sleeve). I'd revisit the issue and get more information, then decide for myself one way or the other. Hope it all works out for you!