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Honestly? You may not have this moment for several months. We stare so much at ourselves in the mirror, just waiting for those changes to flash us a neon sign saying "Here! Here look this is soooo much thinner!" but that's not really how it happens. It took a few months for me before I looked in the mirror and saw myself. And it wasn't I looked in there and said "Damn you fine!" or anything like that. In fact I looked practically deranged since I just come back from my first real run in several years. I was sweaty and gross and blotchy and covered in gnats because summer running sucks... but I really saw a difference. I was capable. That was my "aha!" moment. There are some people who drop 30lbs, but are still in the same sizes. They drop 60lbs and have only dropped 1 pant size. There are some people who drop 15lbs and drop 2 sizes. How we hold our weight is so very different from person to person. So if your looking for each little tiny change, you may miss the bigger picture. Instead, focus on some other aspects. Could you walk further this week than last? Did those stairs kick your ass as much as yesterday? I found this to be very very motivating!

I think therapy will be super helpful for you, and I'm going to talk from my experiences with MY therapist. I understand what you're saying about missing the way you used to eat. From what I've worked through with my therapist, it's the ability to control what goes into my mouth. If I was having a bad day, if my abusive parents went off on me, I could gain control of my life again by eating an entire large pizza. If I was tired, if I felt like I wasn't going anywhere in life, I could eat an entire pasta bread bowl and cheese sticks. I could eat one, two three cheeseburgers because I wanted to, I was in control of how much I ate and went. That feeling of being full, of tasting that food over and over again, was what calmed me down. Unfortunately, like more instant forms of self-harm, it's an unhealthy coping skill. You haven't gained any control by eating two large Double Double meals with milkshakes. All you've done is postponed your time to deal with it. having surgery and having to be "forced" into a new way of eating takes this control away. You can't do what you used to do, so you feel like you're out of control. You are worth so much more than gorging yourself on food. You are worth working through your feelings. You deserve so much more than what your brain may be telling you, and I'm so proud of you. ❤️

Thanks for the love!! It allows me to eat jello once a day and pudding too! I’m just so used to overeating. I guess I’m full but I’m just looking forward to the day where I actually feel it.

Mine is in my signature.

I still have all of my female plumbing, but once I started the pre-op diet and immediately after my surgery I had TWO periods in 2 weeks and I’ve also been spotting pretty frequently, which I’ve never had an issue with before. I also had some crazy mood swings but that’s leveled out. I guess fat cells love to store estrogen, so when we lose weight we deal with that excess estrogen? Don’t quote me but that’s what I was told.

I really like this guy's take on long-term eating after surgery: (Yes, he has a book, and I'm sure he'd love for you to buy it. But I feel like you can get the gist of what he's written about by watching his videos.) If you aren't into videos, he says once you can eat enough that getting enough protein isn't hard for you, you should move to a "veggies first" plan. Focus on getting lots of good, nutritious food. A month out, I am not able to eat enough that this is a reasonable plan for me, yet. But this is kind of where I'm heading, long-term, in consultation with the nutritionists at my surgeon's office. Oh! And he has a video just about diet, too. Here's a link to that. It covers immediate post-op through longer-term.

Hi all - I am getting so much out of reading these forums. Thank you to everyone who contributes. I am speeding my way through my 6 months of weigh-ins, and have had surgery scheduled for February 5th 2019. I'm fine with the timeframe - I have 3 more months to get my house in order. Llike, my literal house - am trying to declutter and deep clean to make things easier post-surgery. I liken it to being 6 months pregnant, and going into nesting mode, LOL. Anyway - I have an unhelpful husband, and two unhelpful daughters (aged 11 and 10). The youngest will sometimes do a surprise clean up for me - but it's very surface and doesn't involve things like washing dishes or doing laundry. I have read, heard, and experienced that very pale redheads like me feel more pain, and need more anaesthesia and painkillers. I have felt it first hand at the dentist and during my c-sections: it takes far more medication to numb me than a normal person. And I do not bounce back fast from surgery typically - with both c-sections it was several weeks, and with the breast reduction that I had 5 years ago it did take me about 6 weeks to get back to normal. Back then, though, my mum was here to help me. She took care of the kids, cooked and cleaned, and made me gorgeous breakfasts. She can't come this time though (she lives in Ireland). Back then I also didn't have an outsde-the-home job to worry about, like I do now. I ran my own business (still do), but I can take whatever time I need for that. Now I also work part time - mostly behind a desk, but with kids who can sometimes run into me by mistake (I run a supervised visitation centre for our local domestic violence agency). I have it set now so I work per diem, so I'm not contracted for specific hours or times (my boss did this 2 years ago so that I could keep working my set hours as usual, but could also take 6 weeks off every summer to go home to Ireland without being penalised. Because I will never give up my summers in Ireland). So I basically can be available for work when I say I'm available. I am planning on taking 4 weeks off. Does that sound excessive? I want to give myself a chance to heal, and to get used to my new reality. I don't have to work there, we don't need the money, and I bascially just do it to get out of the house - so I'm in no rush to go back. My design business that run from home is my main job and my passion. Which leads me to another question - how soon after can I knit? I know some of you do needle crafts. I am a knitwear desiger, so I make all the samples for the patterns I publish. It's not imperative I knit asap - most of my job is writing and maths to be honest - but for my mental health I need to get those needles in my hands as soon as I can. Lastly - how much will I be able to do around the house? My husband is very, very, messy. Like scrubbing the sofa because he has spilled stuff is a daily occurance for me. He goes through clothes so fast that I do a load of laundry a day, and will use clean dish and after clean dish rather than rinse something. I am aiming to recruit my daughters - they are good girls and will be able to help a bit. But I'm fussy, and their standards are not mine, if you know what I mean? It's no good saying that I should make my husband do this or that - I'm no more capable of forcing him to do someting than he is of forcing me to do something. He is a lot older than me (25 years), domestic tasks are like a foreign language to him, and he has the attention span of a gnat and does everything half-assed. Let's just say, I wouldn't eat off a dish he had washed. In 17 years he has never used the washing machine, never vacuumed, never made me a meal, or even a cup of tea. I anticipate a lot of take out (for the kids) and frozen dinners (for him). But am I going to need to get a person in to clean for me? What has your experience been as the sole responsible person when you have been out of action? This is worrying me a lot - I am a planner and a worrier. Our local walmart has just started a grocery pick up service - so I can do that online and just have him pick it up. I have a robot vacuum cleaner (best thing ever), so that helps too. But the bathroom and kitchen will get grungy fast. How long will it be until I can de-grunge them?

my dietician has told me that healthy eating is prioritizing protein first. In the beginning, I think it's to get us in a routine what is healthy.

That is awesome! I’m waiting on insurance to approve and it’s nerve-wracking! Do you have to do the clear liquid diet 2 weeks prior? If so, you’ll be starting that during Thanksgiving right? That sucks!

It does happen and it is super frustrating, but don't give up hope. I felt like I'd be the only one to truly fail and it wouldn't work for me, but it's just a stall. I know that doesn't help when you're on the middle of it but it is normal. Just keep doing the next right thing and it will start again.