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I wonder if this might change as the baby boomers who are experiencing these terrible end of life scenarios for their parents ultimately become like their parents. If at 50 or 60ish, you see what the folks are going thru, would you likely look to make sure this doesn't happen to you? I don't know if this means making sure someone will follow your wishes, or if we start to legislate ways to end life before the quality is all gone. Interesting topic but so sorry it's happening to you personally Arlene.

Frequently Asked Questions - Weight Loss Surgery - What is the honeymoon period? For about 6 to 10 months post-weight loss surgery is the time when it is the easiest to lose weight. Outside of the dreaded stalls, weight generally tends to fall off magically. But eventually the body becomes adjusted to the lower caloric intake and adjusts it's metabolism down. So it's vitally important to take advantage of this "honeymoon period" to stick to your doctor's dietary guidelines and lose as much weight as possible. After the "honeymoon period" it is still possible to lose weight, but it will require more vigilance on caloric intake and diet, being careful not to fall into old habits, and increasing exercise levels to maintain your metabolism. If you like/dislike my videos, please thumb up or down, and leave a comment about how I could improve the content. Your input helps me become a better Youtuber. :-) Keep Pimpin' that Sleeve! Google Plus https://plus.google.com/u/0/b/102076899634252886094/102076899634252886094/posts/p/pub Facebook https://www.facebook.com/pages/Frankensleeve-Vertical-Sleeve-Gastrectomy-VSG-Community/289332951205311 Twitter https://twitter.com/frankensleeve

​So today would have been my parents 74th wedding anniversary. My father died at 89, almost 90 April, 2006. My mother is 95, good to decent health but the mind is gone, full blown dementia. I saw her yesterday and she hates to be bathed, needs to wear Depends and won't. She wears a huge gold ring and while lashing out broke her finger and won't let us cut the ring off. I tried to talk to her, forget it. At 4ish am this morning she fell. She wasn't great getting an x-ray. Don't know yet if she broke anything. Ok, now my rant!! Why is it we can put our beloved pets to sleep and not our parents/spouse or whoever, who is suffering?????????? When my father was dying, my mother, age 87, bathed him, cleaned him, spoon fed him and every day she would say, "Today is a good day for a funeral, Melvin, close your eyes". My mother is that way and if she saw the way she is, she would try to kill herself, I know that. Sorry, but I needed to voice my thoughts. My oldest brother feels the same way as I do. It is enough for our wonderful mother. She was great!! When I see her she always says who is watching the boys. I keep telling her they are 35 & 39. She thinks they are still very young. Sad. Thank you for listening to me. I hope you all don't have to deal with all this. I also have a brother, 69, I am the very youngest of 3, who is mentally challenged . He lives alone but I take care of him. He has type 1 diabetes and takes 4 shots a day and he doesn't get it. I try to explain and help. I have a full plate with family. Everyone enjoy your day. Stay warm. Arlene

I went to my first bariatric support group meeting tonight. It was the first time this group was meeting in our area. There was about 10 of us, some sleeve, some gastric bypass patients. I was the only band to sleeve patient. There was a variety in our ages as well. Average was probably 50. We talked about many things: What stages we were all in; which was great because it varied from 12 days post op (me) up to 2 years post op. Struggles & triumphs (mostly triumphs thus far). One person was "stuck" since Oct with no weight loss. But, in listening to what she eats, it sounds to me as though she might be eating more 'bad' carbs than she should. But, I'm no Dr. Strategies for success: Since I had lost 90 pounds with my band, I talked about how I felt it was very important to pre-plan my meals. I'm a bit neurotic in that I like to plan my family meals 1 month in advance. Some days are off due to activities & things get changed around. But, nonetheless, it helps to plan ahead (at least a few days or a week in advance). This way you're not running around scrambling for ideas & just grabbing whatever.... Protein intake (how much & what kind). Many that are early in recovery are using protein drinks / shakes to increase their protein. Found out its OK to use Premier Pure Protein, found at Costco. I used this before when I was a lap band patient. Fluid intake, which I seem to be struggling with but no one else was. I got a few tips, such as drinking warm or room temp fluids might be easier to handle than ice water or cold drinks Caffeine - do you know why we shouldn't have caffeine in the early stages? Apparently, it dehydrates us. This is something that I definitely have to avoid for the next month, at least until I have this fluid intake down properly Exercise - I asked about going on my recumbent bike. Not something I should consider until week 6 because my stomach needs to heal better. However, walking was highly encouraged! Maintaining a support group outside of this meeting group. Discussed the importance of how sharing our experiences helps > whether by blogging (like writing a diary) as its helpful to vent & get feedback from others, or finding a bariatric "buddy." Focus on limiting sugar intake & increasing protein. Fruits like strawberries, blackberries, blueberries should wait until we're 6 months out. I think it was because of the 'seeds.' We're all planning to bring a favorite bariatric recipe in hopes of collecting 1 per person for the next few months. Then, we'll create a bariatric group recipe book. GREAT idea. That's all I can think of it. Glad I wrote it down so I can remember too I hope this might have helped some of you just starting out in this journey. And, if you're an "old timer," I'd appreciate any feedback you might have on what's making your journey successful. What keeps you motivated? What helps you stay on track?

I have had the same thought -- but then I think about the people who would have to risk their lives just to recover the vehicle from the bottom of the cliff I don't want to be morbid, but you might find interesting the story of Martin Manley. I applaud his philosophy and what he did is certainly very...well, thought provoking. Here's an article about him: http://news.msn.com/us/martin-manley-details-suicide-sets-off-treasure-hunt Even now after all these months, his website gets so many hits that you can't usually get to it. But there is a mirror site that was set up (the link is in the article but here it is too: http://www.zeroshare.info/ ) It's really fascinating...and like I said, thought -provoking. He's kind of a hero I think. Not sure if I agree 100% with every thing he said/ did....but what he did he thoroughly thought out and was extremely practical about and ... wow. Please don't anyone jump on me if you disagree with the subject of the article/website. I am merely sharing access to information. And much love.

My mother is the same way. It is sad. I ask my Dad how he keeps doing it day after day. He said because he remembers when...when she was beautiful, when she would smile etc., and this will be a short time until they will both be whole again.

Tough topic to address, but my brother has voiced something similar. My dad passed away at 87 this past May from colon cancer that spread to his lungs. He was quite the tough cookie & pretty much "healthy" up until the very end. Dad used to take care of mom (take her to Dr appointments all the time (even if she didn't need to go), made her take her meds, etc..). Mom is 85 & has dementia. She recognizes everyone but is just very forgetful & is constantly losing stuff. She doesn't cook, feels she can live on coffee & cookies, or Ensure. She's quite frail but can still get around the house (albeit very slowly). She lives alone now but has a home health care aide that stays with her 5 days a week, 4 hours a day. Her helper is amazing & we adore her. I also help take care of mom. Stop by almost daily, do her shopping & sometimes even cook. I think I'm the only way that can "make" her eat, though very minimally. After almost 60 years of marriage, mom misses dad terribly (as do we) & doesn't feel like going on some times. She barely eats, only if "I" make something & make her eat. She doesn't want to move into a home either. She barely wants to go outside of the house, so she just exists in the home, waling around day in / day out moving things around over & over again to the point that we are constantly looking for things for her. My brother & I promised her (and dad) that we would keep her in her home as long as possible because she felt strongly, and quite frankly, they (government) just take all her money & all proceeds from the sale of her home to take care of her. We find that very frustrating because she loses everything. I digress. My brother feels she is miserable & doesn't want to go on so why should she? It's a very personal, very difficult topic. Why can't we all pass peacefully at, let's say, 90? A good age, hopefully well-lived, and well-loved.

I am so sorry you are having to go through this, and I completely agree with you on your rant. God bless. I'm sending you much love.