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I have not been around as much lately and several LBT friends have asked why…… I was banded in February of 2012, lost 80 pounds in 10 months and have maintained that weight until I had a tummy tuck on Halloween… After the surgery I had 2 drains, they were removed after 2 weeks. Within 5 days, my tummy filled up with fluid and my doctor drained it (this is like drilling for oil with a really BIG needle….. not fun!). Within about 5 days my tummy was full again so my doctor put a drain back in. The next week the area above my belly button filled up with fluid and I had another drain put in just below my bra line. About a week later I had the upper drain removed & that issue was resolved, BUT…. I was still accumulating over 50cc of fluid a day from my lower drain. Doc said the magic number was less than 20cc a day for 2 days in a row, well that wasn’t happening. So on Monday doc flushed Ethanol thru the tubing of my drain into the pocket in my tummy (100cc total). This is supposed to irritate the area between my skin & abdomen wall and cause it to stick together. Today (Thursday) I am still getting 30cc of fluid a day from my drain…… I go back to the doctor Monday. My options are, do the flush again and if that doesn’t work…..another surgery. Ugh Complications happen, I know that. But, how has this affected me mentally? Well, I can’t exercise (every time I do the amount of fluid goes up), I can’t go in my hot tub with my husband (open incision), Have this glamorous drain to carry around in my pocket….. IT SUCKS! And I have gotten very depressed over it. I have disconnected from my life lines (Local support group, LBT wait I mean Bariatric Pal, and my family) Yes I looked to food for comfort. (We won’t even add the holidays on top of all this….) So you wonder….how is my weight? I am about 10 pound over my original goal weight (I weigh between 177-180, depends on the day). But even more important is how I am mentally? I will be honest, I am struggling. I am pissed, why is this happening to me? What did I do to deserve this? WHY? Oh WHY? OH WHY????? Full on pitty me party here!!!! This is my confession, I am not the perfect role model. I struggle, I have pitty me parties, I ask why me…… and so I stayed away from my support. Too many people saw me as inspiration. How can I be inspiration when I am like this???? I am taking my complications day by day. I am not giving up (& yes the tummy tuck was worth it). I just don’t think I can motivate anyone right now.

I cant believe it but i have not eaten not even a bite of processed food in over 2 weeks. The only drinks i have had are cold water and Almond Milk. My whole family jumped on board, so we sold all our unopened processed food to friends, and stocked up on healthy spelt and almond flour, rapadura/panela sugar and coconut sugar, and a heap of fresh veggies and some fruit (we are not big fruit fans, we like it but dont crave it) . I and my eldest son drink almond milk as dairy milk makes us feel sick, so instead of soy milk we turned to the healthier and much more tastier Almond Milk. My youngest son and my husband drink full cream dairy milk, as fat free milk has a higher sugar content and has traces of white paint (as it needs to look like milk since all the fat/white stuff has been removed) and the full cream has healthy fats that the body can process easier anyway. I have stuck to my high protein 1/2 cup of food per meal every day and so far in 5 weeks have lost 16 pounds. So happy with that effort. When i went to say hi to my medical clinic staff, they were amazed by the transformation my face and belly are making. The nurse said my facial skin looks so beautiful and healthy, so i told her about going off all processed foods and drinking almost a gallon of water a day and she was so happy for me. A few other people commented how great my skin looks. I am so excited with this change and have so so SOOOO much more energy.

Hello everyone. I haven't been writing lately but I have been reading. Sorry, just been busy with life. Today I go for a 3 month check up and I failed. How did I fail? I didn't lose any weight but stayed within 3-5 pounds of my last visit. When I go and get a fill it is very tiny under .4cc. My doctor goes slow. I have not been to the gym since November but I pay every month. Joke of the day: What do gyms call people like me, who pay and don't go? Profit!! I had an ugly thing on my forehead and had it removed the other day and have 2 blue stitches. So right now bending over makes me a little dizzy. But I have gym clothes on. I bought a new 'outfit' yesterday. The real Arlene likes outfits not separates. I am nuts. When I skied many moons ago (I learned at 40) my skis, boots, poles and my ski outfits all matched and had the same colors. I am nuts. I am so nutty that I have sox to match sweaters. Orange stripes. I buy men's sox because I wear a size 12 shoe. So soon I will be at the doctor's and he won't be pleased with my weight not being down. Everyone have a great weekend. Please cheer for the NE Patriots!!!! We need a super bowl, because we are Boston Strong. Speaking of Boston Strong, that came after the marathon bombings, the RMV just approved a new license plate with Boston Strong on it! Some of the money will go to the marathon survivors. Enjoy your weekend. Arlene