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So recently on a different blog that I run (which can be found here, but warning: it is slightly not safe for work and also not WLS-specific) I was asked this question by one of my followers: "Hey sorry I disappeared! I ended up passing out last night and was busy today. (re: lap band). It's something I've been thinking about getting one myself. Are you happy you had it done? Has it made a big difference in your life? Were you scared of getting it? Lol sorry I'm bombarding you with questions." I thought that my answer might be beneficial for this blog, as well, so here was my response! For those of you just joining us, this ask is about the Lap Band procedure that I had in June. All opinions and information expressed here is my own personal experience, and anyone that has experienced differently (or similarly!) I’d love to hear from you 1) Am I happy that I had it done? Absolutely. 2) Has it made a big difference in my life? I cannot tell you how much this has improved my self-worth and my self-esteem, and how my overall sense of self has skyrocketed. I’ve started wearing dresses again and showing off my legs (which is the area where most of my insecurities are focused - I hate my thighs more than any other part of my body). This has impacted my life so positively that I can’t even begin to tell you. 3) Was I scared of getting it? Honestly- not so much. I’ve never been afraid of medical procedures, though. More than anything, I was excited about how I knew my life would improve once I’d had the procedure, and how much happier I would be with myself once I’d seen steady progress. I have spoken to several people since who have expressed interest in getting it, and to be honest, while I would love to immediately answer ‘YES DO IT’ to everyone, there are a lot of things to keep in mind: It’s incredibly expensive. The surgery was $16,000 (this included pre- and post-operative care and post-operative check-ups and band fills). However, you may be eligible to have it covered (at least partially) by insurance. My insurance, however, did not cover it for a variety of reasons. Firstly (and most importantly), my insurance specifically excluded bariatric procedures of any kind. Second, I did not have any co-morbidities. I was ‘morbidly obese,’ but my health showed otherwise. I don’t have high blood pressure, no cholesterol issues, no heart problems, etc.. Medically, aside from being overweight, there was nothing wrong with me. Once the band is fully inflated to your comfort point, you can only eat about 4 ounces at a time. This can be incredibly awkward at dinner parties, or going out to eat with clients, or with friends who don’t know what you've done (I didn’t want to tell EVERYONE that I know). It severely limits your food intake, as well as the types of foods that you can eat, and this is not something that’s easy to handle. I had resigned myself to that fact a long time before I actually had the surgery, and I have been pretty accepting of this fact, and sometimes I’ll be pretty upset that I can’t eat certain things, but I keep reminding myself that it’s worth it, and that eases the longing (a tiny bit). Certain foods that you love now will make you sick once you have a lap band. I can’t eat bread, I can’t eat anything too heavy or that has a breadlike consistency (cakes, pancakes, etc). I can’t eat pork now. I can’t reheat meats (they become too dry and get stuck). There is a device inside your body. When I lay a certain way, it pulls on my stomach and my muscles and it hurts. When I stretch my body a certain way, I can feel it. When I lay on my back, I can feel the port and when something pushes on your stomach, it hurts. You will always feel it there. It becomes a permanent part of you— they don’t remove it unless you have a second surgery. This isn’t a decision to take lightly— I got the lap band because I know myself, and I know that I cannot regulate myself when it comes to eating, and I needed that constant medical intervention. You will have scars. This isn’t an issue for me, but some people are more sensitive about scars on their body. Personally, because of my body type and the way that I carried my weight (mostly in my butt and thighs) I was eligible for a ‘Spider’ type of procedure, where they make only 2 incisions (One inside your bellybutton and a tiny one under the breast to inflate the stomach cavity). The incision inside my bellybutton is pretty obvious, but the tiny one is pretty much gone (I’m happy to show you a picture of what my bellybutton looks like now, but keep in mind that I just scar very badly. Like— I just do not heal well, so my results are atypical). If the spider procedure is not an option, then the laproscopic procedure will leave (I believe) between 4 and 7 incisions over your stomach (please do not quote me on this— I do not know the specifics and from what I could find online, it looks like there are anywhere between 4 and 7 incisions made). If your stomach shows, people will ask you about the scars because people are shits. You need to commit to exercise. This is something that I put off as long as possible (mostly because my weight made it so that when I exercised I felt like absolute **** and my joints hurt and it was just an all around bad decision to try and exercise when I was heavier. But as soon as I started exercising… the weight just started falling off. Seriously— I went from losing an average of 7 lbs every 4-6 weeks to losing 15 lbs in 6 weeks. It was a great feeling, and the fact that I could exercise and NOT feel awful about myself afterward was pretty fantastic. You may be able to get by without exercising for a while, but you will plateau and the only way to get past it is to exercise! It will be the most difficult decision, but can be absolutely the best decision of your life. As I mentioned earlier, I can’t even tell you how much it has meant to me to feel like I have my life back and to have confidence again. I’ve lost 2 pants sizes and 3 dress sizes, and I get excited now to exercise and to go out and dress up. It really just puts a whole new spin on life. For me— I’ve always been heavy, so other people may have different experiences, and for others it might be that they’re getting back to how they once were. Either way- I’m the healthiest I have been in years, and I’m smaller than I have been in years, and I have more energy than I have in years. If you have any other questions, please PLEASE feel free to shoot me a message! I’m pretty much an open book when it comes to this kind of stuff. I would love to be able to help other people who are going through what I used to go through.

As with many, many people, my struggle with weight started long before I new anything about counting calories and carbs. I was overweight by 3rd grade and "fat" (according to the kids in school) by 5th grade. I was heavy all through school. Sure, I have lost weight here and there, but have always been far from the elusive "ideal" weight. My sister had a Gastric Bypass many years ago (maybe 15) and she was very sick and is now just as big (if not bigger) then prior to surgery. I always told myself and others "I would NEVER have surgery." Well, as they say, never say never! Now here I am 8 days from going under the knife. What changed? Several things. There have been new developments - new surgeries and techniques - that were not in practice 15 years ago. I have or am dealing with many issues medically. I have support in my life that is greater then any I have ever known. I could probably go on, but the best answer is that time changed my mind for me. For the last several years I have struggled medically. I am lucky that I do not have many of the typical problems associated with obesity - high blood pressure, high cholesterol, diabetes. I was, however, diagnosed 3 or 4 years ago with Lupus and Fibromyalgia. The pain can be debilitating on some days. I am on many medications for all of this and all of them have the side effect of weight gain. I have talked with my PCP as well as my Rheumatologist on several occasions about loosing weight; by loosing weight I will take pressure off of my joints and muscles possibly buying me some much needed relief. This has been an uphill (or stagnant) battle. No matter what I tried there was little to no weight loss. My final attempt was suggested over a year ago and I did not want to do it due to the financial aspect of it. I began taking a prescription drug, Qsymia, that cost me (WITH INSURANCE COVERAGE) $200+ a month! I was on the drug for 6 months, costing me over $1200 dollars, and lost 17 lbs! I worked so hard; I exercised through the pain, I ate 1500 to 1200 (more often less) everyday and I lost a pathetic 17 lbs. ! What the hell?!?! During this time my PCP told me at several visits that he thought Lap Band was the way to go for me. I am still admit that surgery was not an accepible option. At the end of the six months on Qsymia, I was heartbroken, defeated, and beaten. I called my PCP with tears in my eyes and asked for a referral for Lap Band and wanted to meet with him to talk it over some more with me and my husband. I went to the visit and I had been off the Qsymia for a couple weeks and had gained about half of the 17 lbs. back. He told me that he did not think that UVA would let me do that Lap Band because I am too obese. I burst into tears because I was still not sure about Lap Band, much less getting anything where they cut your organs and stitch you back up (for some reason a foreign object in my body seemed safer). My PCP gave me the referral for Lap Band anyway (probably because he was tired of my crying in his office). On November 7, 2013, my husband and I went to UVA for the class/consultation and the first words our of the nurse's mouth were "I am going to convince you NOT to get a Lap Band." My husband and I just looked at each other with surprise and confusion all over our faces. I whispered to him "No. I am not going to have any other type of surgery!" Well, as you already know, I did not hold to true to that statement. She described in detail all three surgeries that they can do; band, sleeve, and bypass, and the post-op instructions for each. Then the nutritionist came in and discussed diet for the surgeries. After this, we had a break before we saw the surgeon. Immediately we sat down and looked at each other and started asking what the other thought in the hopes that we each felt the same way; the sleeve was the right way to go, but we have more questions for the surgical team. We went into the room to meet one on one with the surgical team members and told my story, expressed our concerns, and asked questions. Everyone on the team agreed that the sleeve was a much better choice in my situation then the band. I was fighting against too much and that I need to be able to change my body's chemical makeup (this will happen naturally when part of my stomach is removed) in order for there to be significant change. Final decision made: Gastric Sleeve. Within the next two weeks, I had my psychiatric evaluation and had hospital records from an Endoscopy sent to UVA. The insurance authorization processes for Bariatric Surgery had begun before I even met the surgeon. Now all I could do was wait. It took every bit of three weeks to get the psych eval results and four page document stating at the end that "...bariatric surgery is recommended..." was sent to the insurance company and UVA. Two weeks after that I was called with insurance approval and set a date to meet with the surgeon one more time and to have an gallbladder ultrasound. The appointment went very well and all of my presurgery labs and x-rays were done, we met with the anesthiaology nurse, and a date was set. On January 20, 2014, I will have the Gastric Sleeve, a Hiatal Hernia Repair, and my Gallbladder removed! Every day it gets closer and every day I get a little bit more nervous. I am not scared. I am just anxious. There is so much to do; train someone to do my job at work (I'm a total control freak over this and it is not easy to let go); get my house and finances in order; get my important paper work in order (you never know what could happen); buy all the necessary post-op stuff; etc. It will all get done (I hope!), and if not, it will just have to wait till I recover enough to do it (again, hard to let go)! Friday they will call me with the time to report to UVA and time of surgery. As anxious as I am, I could not be more excited!

So I've called my doctors, and they still haven't got any idea what's happening, not much faith. So now I'm planning on emailing my actual surgeon to see what's happening. March last year was when I last saw him, hopefully I can get at least the slightest answer/piece of hope. I will not give up, I refuse to. On other news, I'm doing great on my diet! Also, did anyone also have worried relatives? My sister seems to be trying to.. change my mind in a way. I know everyone's worried of someone they love having major surgery, but I have been fighting for this for 5+ years and It'll change my life for the best. Just wish others could see the way I do.