So sorry about the loss of your son. I lost my son too, he was stillborn, very different but the same in many ways. I am having the lap-band as opposed to bypass or sleeve (truely because I'm a scaredy cat) to each their own. I know how difficult it is to focus on ourselves after something so traumatic. My loss is only a little over 1 year and I know for sure that eating is part of my comfort plan. Now, I must fine more positive things within myself. I just live FOR my angel as if he were still here, which I see you do too! Good luck with your procedure and your future weight-loss!