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I normally don’t get into politics but my phone will not stop ringing. And I had to stay off of Facebook because of all the negativity that is being posted. For those who don’t know I am a federal employee. I’ve been working for the government since I was 20. I love my employer and I love working with veterans. Today I got a letter saying after Friday I will be furlough. Am I mad? No just disappointment that we as a nation can’t get it together. I walk by faith not by sight. So for the next 3 days I will come into work with a smile on my face and continue help and working with our nations veterans. I hear everyone complaining about being out of work but I don’t see what their plan is. Here is my plan: I will try to work as many hours I can at the day care (job number 2) Tomorrow I will call up some temp agencies and see what they can do for me. I have to remember my situation is only temporary. Anyway Today is my 5 month bandversary and I feel great! Thanks for reading.

Haven't posted in a while mostly because well nothing too exciting happening. Staying the course with my diet. I am still doing a morning shake everyday. I use a scoop of unflavored unjury, skim milk and ice and a couple packets of truvia then add coffee, its been something I actually look forward to. I still have yet to find any food that does not agree with me. (not always a good thing) I find that bread and potatoes fill me up to the point of being uncomfortable so I just stay away, but things like chips and crackers do go down easy so I am not letting those come into the house. I am having fun with cooking, using the recipes I find on theworldaccordingtoeggface blog. I made some lettuce wraps that turned out great the other day. My husband even liked them. We grilled steak this weekend and it was amazing! I only have to buy one steak now and we split it. My exercise is still low key, I walk 3-5 times a week with a coworker, I need to turn it up a bit and get weights in but the weather has been so nice I want to enjoy it to the bitter end! I have all winter to be inside in the gym. As of today I am down 30 pounds and I am 8 weeks out. My closet is starting to not yield much to wear. I have this gap of clothing the "too big" stuff is being thrown into a pile for friends and goodwill, and the "I will get there" clothes are still out of reach and there's not much in-between. I am down to one or 2 pairs of jeans that I can fit. I never realized how long I went wearing clothes that were too tight simply because I couldn't wrap my head around buying the next size up! I may do a big overhaul on the closet this weekend. in 2 weeks I go on a girls trip and we will be hitting some outlet malls, I won't go crazy buying stuff but need to get a few things., I like how shirts are fitting me now. I am top heavy and have lost almost 2 cup sizes, the girls are a bit lower but still look nice in a bra! LOL, I managed to find 2 old bras that I had stashed because they were too small so that has saved the pocket book. My progress remains at 1-2 pounds a week. Sometimes with an extra bonus pound in there somewhere. So I am not the fast loser I hoped I was going to be but this is the fastest I have ever lost weight in my life and kept it off! And for once there's no end in sight, no rebound with binges because I can't handle being no carb or so super food restrictive that I just crash into a bag of McDonalds like a raving lunatic! I look at food for nutrition but I also allow for what I am craving. Partly because its such a small amount. I can usually curb a craving with a sugarfree popsicle, or a couple crackers with peanut butter. I have stayed away from all the cider doughnuts that keep making their way into my office. I did have a minisnickers but kept it to just that one! Which was a feat in itself. I am keeping with the mantra of protein first, and have not had a problem sticking to it. It doesn't really require much thought anymore. I know I am still in the "honeymoon" phase, I have no real hunger just a weird feeling when I go too long between meals. I love the little blue diamond 100 calorie almond packets. I usually have one between my morning shake and lunch, I also have been making mini rollups for a quick protein snack. I take a mini dill pickle, half of a slice of deli ham and a teaspoon of low fat cream cheese, roll it up and its a perfect quick grab snack. This is becoming quite long winded(and I can't separate paragraphs for some reason) I feel good about my future feeling optimistic. So on that note I will end this

I didn't believe the dr. and nurses when they said I might not see the scale numbers falling at some point, but my clothes will tell me I'm still losing. Well it's happening. I'm not losing the lbs like I was, but I'm down in size. I've lost 77 lbs so far and in a size 12, from a 24! I'm shopping in 'regular' sized stores for the first time in 15+ years. It's a sense of freedom that I am relishing. I'm running 3.9 miles 5 days a week, but I know I need to start weight training, squats, abs, etc. Running is an escape for me, mindless, I listen to my audio-book and enjoy the beautiful weather. But as they say - "winter is coming!" So I'll need to make a plan for my exercise routine soon. After my birthday week-end of splurging a bit and rediscovering my taste for SUGAR, I'm noticing that I'm 'craving' sugar again. So I think I'm going to go cold turkey off of anything sweet to lose my taste for it again. I know myself well enough to understand that a little turns into too much all too quickly. Feeling excited about see family at Thanksgiving who haven't seen me since before the surgery.

It was hard to face reality a year and a half ago, they I was just shy of 250 lbs and had to do something to stop it before I hit 300. The first year I must say was the honeymoon period with my band. I felt like I hardly had to work at losing weight, it just fell off. It was wonderful and exciting. Then bang- my one year aniversary hit and my weight loss came to a streeching halt- the band's fault- nope mine. The first year, was easy because my weight was high and I was eating far less that what it takes to keep that weight. I couldn't eat as much as normal- so I lost weight. As the weight came off, I hit the titration point- I had finally lost down to the amount that my eating was matched. Now, I have to face reality, I can keep going with what I am doing and stay in the same zone. I can, make changes- eat even less and or add exercise. The thing is, at this point, it's not going to be so easy. Now I must really work at it. I, also, must deal with weakness in myself, that I never really got rid of. Stress makes me want to eat. Last night as I lay watching TV with the hubs (Ziva's last episode on NCIS) I started thing, boy I want a snack. The thing was I wasn't hungry. I didn't need to eat anything. However, I gave into the weakness and went and got a bowl of ice cream. It slapped me in the head as I sat the empty bowl down in the sink, that I had just done something I would have done pre-band. That was not good- I have to nip that in the bud now. Will it be easy, no, but I must do it to maintain and to further succeed on my journey. I know what I must do, I know what I need to do, yet I have not done it for months. Now, it's time to pull on the big girl panties and make some difficult choices and changes. It's time to face the music, because the reality it, if I go back to old way I will gain back all I have lost. The reality is I must, for my health, for my future, for my peace of mind- I must make these changes. Is it my band failing me, no, it is myself and my human weakness trying the make me fail. But, here is the thing- I have the power to stop it, to change it, to change it now before it goes to far. Yeah, I may have lost even more if I would have gone with the sleeve or bypass, but I likely would have run into the same stumbling block at some point. I hope I can do this!

Well for the past couple of weeks my hair as been coming out more and more. And I was in denial until this past weekend when I remembered cleaning out my brush Wednesday and was full of hair again Saturday. So I got some biotin, got more multivitamins, some protein shots, biotin pills, biotin shampoo&conditioner. Then I decided that my hair was falling out largely due to the fact that I was tugging on all my tangles. So I decided to get my hair cut. So today I have 12 inches less of hair. freaked out a bit but I am OK with it. Lol See the before and afters

As some of you know I watch tv until the wee hours and sleep late. On Nightline last night was about going out of the country for less expensive surgeries. A company in NC with letters like HSM (can't recall exactly) had two employees who needed surgery. The company sent them to Costa Rica first class all the way. The woman had by pass or sleeve (was not the band) and the man had knee replacement. Plus the company gave them each $2500. for sh*ts. The company felt by sending them to Costa Rica they saved about 1/2 price. After they showed everything and of course everything came out ok they had on a Harvard lawyer. The lawyer said that if there was a problem there is no mal-practice insurance and how great are the doctors etc. The knee replacement inserts (I'll them) were around $7-9000. and in this country double. They said that is why people go to other countries for surgery. Just giving Arlene's thoughts and informing others about out of country surgeries. I have seen on this site that some people go to Mexico. There is a weird saying that a person who finishes last place at medical school is still called 'doctor'.

So today I met with my surgeon for the first time since surgery. (Surgery date 9/11/13) He was very pleased with everything including the 15 pounds that I have loss since 8/30/13 one month ago when I had my pre surgery appointment. I have been cleared to start back up my work out/exercise program. I have been doing the Lesile Sansone walking DVDs since February when I started my 6 month pre surgery wait. I swear by them and give them the credit for my 64 pound pre-surgery weight loss. Also cleared me to be romanic with my husband again! yippee! And also I leave pureed behind and start introducing more textrued foods. Today for dinner we grilled Maui Maui and I ate 1.7 ounces just by chewing and chewing and did I mention chewing. I had a tiny bit of heart burn, but over all nothing bad. I feel great and overall am excited to begin a more normal routine.

Today although it's not like it wasn't apparent before ... i truly realized how blessed i am to work where i do. For the 1st week post surgery my manager supported 100% my working a reduced schedule at home with no impact to pay.. Being back in the office was less of a hindrance than i thought along with being chased home around 2pm everyday with the words go home and rest and heal..My work environment is amazing.. my desk is height adjustable so that i can go from sitting to standing at my desk easily so that i can take the pressure of the port incision so that it won't hurt as much. to they gym facilities where i can walk on the thread mil for as long as i want while i take a meeting on the phone. To the cafe with their long list of healthy/organic food options. to the AMAZING laptop bag our admin just ordered so that i don't have to carry my laptop around - given that it's pretty darn heavy.. I AM BLESSED..

Tomorrow, October 2, 2013, is the day I have my first pre-op appointment. 3:30 pm (cst). I pretty positive I will be approved and I'm pretty positive that Medicare will pay for it. My BMI is 46 and I'm a type 2 diabetic with high blood pressure. My surgery will be in a Center of Excellence (even though that it not a requirement anymore I feel good about) that has had their rating since 2007. Yesterday I shared what I was doing with my brother. I think I expected him to say something like have you thought about this carefully but instead he was totally supportive as has been my son.

The nurse just called to tell me my labs yesterday look great and my diabetes is GONE! My blood pressure is down to 102/62 - amazing and the MS is still at bay. I feel so good and I'm still 56 lbs from my goal. I'm back at school and my colleagues have been wonderfully supportive and kind with their reactions to my deflated self. Had a few people not recognize me, so that's fun. The kids are so cute, they look at me with a bit of shock, but don't say anything, obviously struggling with what's appropriate in the situation. I love my job! Shopping is getting easier too. I was so excited yesterday to be able to shop in the 'regular' sized area and get XL (instead of my usual 3X) tops. Freedom! It's been blazing hot in Iowa for the last 10 days so I've been running on the treadmill, which I've named 'the evil one.' I LOVE my trail jogs in nature, but the evil one has pushed me to go faster and further, so that's something at least. Wondering if I should sign up for a 5K run in the area since I'm doing 3.5 miles easily now. I don't have a group that I'd be able to run with, so I'm leaning towards . . . not yet. Dear husband has been so wonderful, making me feel desirable again and so powerful. I love that man. I couldn't have done any of this without him.