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I have the greatest NSV news ever! I got the results of my first labs post-op and my triglycerides went down from a whopping (for me- I know I wasn't the worst) 298 high risk to a normal range 98!!! My overall cholesterol count is now 178, down from 260. My LDL And HDL have also vastly improved. I was so happy I thought I might just float away! The last time those numbers were in the healthy range for me was in 1998, so you can understand my excitement If I ever had any doubts about having the sleeve, it would be because "what if my cholesterol stays the same? Will it be worth the risks just to come out of it with the same CHD risk factor?" Now I have my answer! If I never lose another pound, another inch or get back any discernable muscle tone, it has officially all been worth it to have been sleeved. I was 3 months out on August 6th: I am now 186 lbs and bought my first pair of size 14 pants yesterday. My bra size has decreased from 44DDD to 38DD and shirt size down from 2X to XL. Thanks to my sister for suggesting I look into the sleeve option and to Dr. Snyder for giving me this opportunity for better health and a longer life! Love to my sweet husband, family, friends and coworkers who have been positive and awesomely supportive from day one. I am truly blessed. I am sending out positive vibes to all my current and future sleeve sisters and brothers for success in your personal journeys, as well! Don't worry about speed, just stay focused on progress - no matter how incremental - and stay positive~ HappyCat xxx

This weekend brought an end to the preserving of my spring/summer garden (except for the okra which will produce thru September). It was a good year: 137 pounds of Zucchini (15 plants) 104 pounds of Yellow Squash (15 plants) 30 ½ pounds of Patty Pan Squash (5 plants) 43 ½ pounds of cucumbers (5 plants) 73 pounds of Tomatoes (10 plants) 4 bushels of pears (2 trees) I spent the summer preserving all this every way I could: pickles, relishes, preserves, marmalades, minced meat, pie fillings, canned tomatoes, canned pears, frozen roasted tomatoes, frozen squash, casseroles, zucchini bread, zucchini cake, zucchini hummus, zucchini cobbler (tastes like apple!)… You name it! It’s been nonstop!! What does this have to do with the band? You wonder…… EVERYTHING! Pre band I could not have done a fourth of what I did this summer. I couldn’t cook dinner in the summer without sweating like a pig. I would have a towel around my neck wiping the sweat off my face before it dripped into the pan (for reals!). I would have to sit down every five minutes because my back was hurting. I hated working in the kitchen and doing anything outside forget it. My husband use to do all the work on the land, I couldn’t physically help him….. I don’t exercise, I hate the gym and any formal exercise routine. It’s never worked for me….. but I move. I move all the time. I walk and take the stairs as much as I can at work. Every day when I get home I have to feed the chickens, pick produce from the garden, pull weeds, etc. And the weekends are full of chores too, cleaning chicken coops, mowing lawns, pulling more weeds, building goat shelters…. I have so much energy now that all this work is nothing, just life on my farm. Just last night my husband asked me… “So what is my zucchini mama gonna do next?”…….hummmmm

So I am 3 weeks out from surgery! Can I get a woo hoo! I am starting to feel more like me and not a weight loss patient. As I see it this feeling can only improve as I progress. I can actually sit down with my family and have meals. Albeit I can't eat exactly what they are eating but I can eat with them and have my own plate of food (I am offically on soft foods for a week or so)! Been loving my fish soft veggies and chicken salad! I notice too I can tolerate a whole 1/4 sometimes even 1/2 of cup of food! I ate nearly a whole tomato (a very small tomato from my garden like gold ball size) and 1/2 cup of chicken salad yesterday. I freaked out! I actually called myself a pig to my hubby! WHAT?! My hubby looked at me and said are you kidding our 18 month old eats more than that?! Yeah he is right, I was just having a OMG moment. I get them sometimes even this early out! I had to get rid of some clothes this week. I had some things that were baggy and needed to go. I am not going to be one of those people who are going to wear saggy sad clothes. I like my clothes to fit, saggy butt is not cute! I have always looked nice no matter what size. It ain't changing! But as I was getting rid of things I thought really Shannon you might needs these again! Where the hell did this negative girl come from? I ofcourse pushed on and thought shut up negative nelly these clothes are outta here. What a feeling of accomplishment! The scale has tempted me this week! I hopped on today after swearing I was going to only weigh in on Fridays! I had lost but I don't want the scale to determine my success. I knew I had lost because my clothes were getting loose. That stupid number is just a number! But it still has power over me and I was glad it went down! This is something I am working on! Stalls WILL HAPPEN and I need toprepare myself for that. Previous diet attempts this is usually were I would give up and go on a binge so to speak! Not this time thanks to my sidekick sleevey! We are going to get through stalls like nobody's business! (I hope I don't became a blubbering mess!) Anyway, I am thankful so far for my surgery and feel I have a realistic mindset and postive attitude through the very short sleeved experience. Hope I can keep this sunny outlook! Things that are working for me are... I don't track my food calories or carbs. Nor will I ever do that again! I eat a healthy balanced diet. I try to keep a rough count of protein and make sure I get my water for the day (all in my head). I go by how I feel. I know what 64oz of water is. I know what dehydration feels like and the signals that I need more. I didn't get this surgery to became obsessed with every bit of food that passes my lips! Which honestly is not very much! I did that before and I am not living like that again! It didn't work and caused eating to be a form of punishment and when I failed (i.e. ate a cupcake) I would beat myself up. Plus I have two girls and I don't want to pass on those negative traits to them. I remember my mom always being on a diet growing up and it affected how I was! I thought my self worth was based on my weight and clothes size. Right now while I am healing I have to change things up but my girls know mommy's tummy is healing. I am not dieting! If I have moments of weakness I don't let them see it. (like calling my self fat or pig!) I am not perfect but I am trying not to pass this to them! I love food and different flavors and still do! So I experiement with different spices and mix it up. I always ate healthy foods before and enjoyed them but let my weak moments sabatoge all the good I put in. I am following my guidelines but also listening to my body. For instance I was not suppose to start pureed for 2 weeks but at 1 week 5 days I needed a little more fuel to fill me up and moved to pureeds. I am not advocating this but I am very in tuned to my body and it worked for me. I am active and needed more than I was getting! Next week I may not be ready for "real" foods and may hang on soft foods longer. We will see! I take my measurements every week! I have lost 14 inches from my thighs waist hips arms and bust! Lets me see how my body is shrinking! That is more exciting than weighing and will get me through those stalls! I don't talk alot to others about my weight loss or surgery. If they mention it I say yeah I am feeling great and I am doing well and that is it. If they mention my weight loss I say Thank you! I am Shannon not a SLEEVE. I happened to have surgery but people who had gallbladder surgery don't constantly talk about it! This is my outlet for that not my real day to day life. I had the surgery to get healthy and prevent future health problems. Not for it to become who I am! I do not do fat free sugar free. I eat real foods! I can't wait to not need the protein drinks and shakes! As soon as I can consume enough protein from foods they are going out with the trash! I believe real whole foods are best for my body! I eat a piece of chocolate everyday (started back when I went to soft foods)! I buy the good stuff and have a square every night! It give me sweet dreams! Plus a small piece of dark chocolate has health benefits! Moderation is key here! Well that is what is on my mind today! Go out and enjoy life and have a great day!

I had so many issues wih getting enough protein due to me not being able to stomach protein shakes. Well I finally sucked it up and sat myself done and had a serious conversation. I cannot get my protein in with food alone and as you all know I need to get it down. So I decided to get over my fear of the taste and focus on the reasons for having it. It is just like taking liquid medicine that taste horrible. I finally did it...... for the past several days I have been drinking protein shakes and it is only getting better. I was even able to break out the ready makes shakes that I hid in the back of fridge because I hated the taste so bad and now I'm having them for lunch and dinner. So better health here I come.

SO Here is my motivation list. Things I will do when I get to my goal weight. Skiing with no boot extenders Ride a rollercoaster comfortably Tan out by the pool Learn to salsa dance Go to an actual zumba class Experiement with different sex positions Go hiking and not feel like dying Not be the biggest person in the room Fit back into my little black dress Looking awesome on the back of a bike Go to the gym and not feel self consious Buy clothes that arent in the plus size Get lingerie See my ex when I'm 100pds lighter Walk up my steps without getting winded

I had my first fill today and it wasn't fun. I have two bruises and two bandages over my port. I had to get them standing up. I am going to try to work with the fill i received so that I can stay away from being prodded with that big darn needle. I was livid when I saw that I only lost 3.2 pounds but now that I think about it. I dont feel bad about it. I look great in my old clothes and I can go down stairs without sweating. I was told to stop with the bread, rice and pasta.. I had my hand slapped for that one. I was also told to exercise five days a week for at least an hour. so starting next week that is my new goal.

I got on the scale this morning, and I am now 190 lbs, my surgeon's goal! I had gone camping for a week with my son's Boy Scout troop, and did pretty much EVERYTHING wrong. I tried my best, but it was hard. I didn't get nearly enough protein, water, ate too fast, and ate not the right things. I got home and was down a lb. But then, the next day I was down 2 more. And the next day (today), down another. I have lost 84 lbs from my top weight. My wife and a few other people are telling me I am starting to look too skinny. I don't agree, I'd like to lose another 10 or so lbs. I'm still not even considered in the 'normal' range yet, 189 is the upper end of the normal range for 6'1".

A little over 6 months post op and I can feel some unusual things happening. I am starting to think like a thin person. It was a slow, gradual change for me. What I mean when I am starting to think like a thin person is that I no longer dwell on things that I ate that wasn't in my perfect vision of my "diet". Pre-surgery (actually a few months even after surgery), if I ate something that wasn't on my envisioned list of allowed foods, then I would just get all emotional about it. I would dwell on it. I would have it in my head that I messed up and I was a failure. I would allow one "naughty" food to dictate my entire days' worth of eating. It was a form of sabotage, and it would set me into a cycle. I would eat, get depressed, and feel like a failure and then eat again. Slowly, but surely I began to allow myself to eat things that weren't on my perfect diet list. I found that even on those days when I had something like crackers or something else that I didn't think would help my weight loss I still lost weight. Some times I even found that it helped my weight loss when I was in a stall. Other times it helped my work outs progress. I guess what I am trying to say is that I ate something naughty and found out that my world didn't end. I didn't gain weight over night, I didn't look in the mirror and see an extra roll of fat, and other people didn't look at me and see that I "cheated". Slowly over time, my mind started to grasp this concept and started transforming. I feel a lot better about food. I don't rely on it as much. I am not afraid of it as much. All these emotions are not tied up to it as much. If one day I have a craving that I just can't shake, like m&ms...I have a few. The difference is I have a FEW and not the whole bag. I savor the taste and then move on. One little craving doesn't end up costing me days and eventually months of over eating and unhealthy eating. As a fat person, I was so hung up on food. Every thought of my day was tied to food. Am I over eating? Was that too much weight? Is this too much carbs? As a fat losing person, I eat normally. If I feel I might have eaten a little too much I just try to balance it out by moving more throughout the day. I think I am finally finding some balance. My anxiety has come down a whole lot now that I am not constantly obsessing over every aspect of food or eating.

Hunger/Cravings/Emotional/Habitual: [ FEEL FREE TO RELATE AND LAUGH WHILE READING ] If you have lived as a human on this planet we like to call Earth, you have experienced these different forms of eating habits. For some us, we have mastered the eating maze and are healthy and happy individuals. For some of us, we were just blessed with good genes that kept and continue to keep us skinny. Others may choose other methods of dealing with hunger and/or engage in habits that keeps them thin (but are in no way beneficial to their health): anemia, bulimia, drugs, even smoking (so I have been told). And then there is the rest of the world, the majority, who simply eat. Well as promised, I stated that I would share as I learned. So here we go. Three days ago, I started to have a strange craving for salt. I figured I just wanted something salty: French fries or something. The first day, I tried saltine crackers- didn't work. The Second Day, I broke down and got a small fry from McDonalds - after three fries and a terrible time swallowing it- I threw the rest away. I figured chips would hurt worse than fries so I didn't go there. By the third day, I was ready to pour salt in my hand and eat it. I ended up eating mashed potatoes with salt and Cajun seasoning. I wasn't really hungry nor did I want any of the things I mentioned. I just wanted the salt. We are conditioned to believe that cravings are ALWAYS remnants of are past BAD eating habits: nothing good can come of it. So I didn't mention it to the doctor. Well, I had a routine follow up scheduled the next day: blood, urine and so forth. Come to find out, I was Dehydrated. One of the symptoms associated with Dehydration is craving salt. Upon finding out this information, I told my doctor about the last three days. He listened and then he explained. There are several types of eating habits, but to simplify here are four main types: hunger or regular, cravings, emotional, and habitual eating. Hunger: Regular - Biologically Necessary Eating: When the food you have previously consumed has been digested and used, the body sends off signals to the brain to start the process of alerting you ( growling stomach, headache, and so forth) that you need nourishment. Insert a bunch of doctor talk here....and then arrive to the point. You need to eat small portions throughout the day to keep your system fueled and your blood sugar levels regulated. Cravings: Mostly a mental hunger but can occasionally be a symptom of a bigger health issue. Cravings are greatly linked to the wonderful neurotransmitters we call endorphins: the feel good stuff. Deserts, fast food, candy, and so forth can all be linked to cravings associated with the release of endorphins. Giving into a craving WITH MODERATION every now and then is not a bad thing. As my doctor has stated once before: deprivation is the mother of all diet breaking habits. Deprive yourself of something long enough and you will most likely binge when you do eat it. A few potato chips did not make you overweight OVER NIGHT. It took Several Bags of Chips over Several Nights to add the pounds. MODERATION is the key. Keeping a food log is a great help in this department. You will begin to see patterns in your eating habits. For example, when and what types of cravings you have and how you dealt with them. And if you find yourself craving something over and over again, do not hesitate to talk to your doctor or nutritionist. In some cases, as it was with my need for salt, there may be a greater medical issue at hand. Emotional eating: Well this topic needs no introduction and has a simple explanation: attempting to make us temporarily feel better through eating. We usually engage in emotional eating during times of Stress, Grief, Anxiousness, Indecision, Depression, Helplessness, and so forth. The best way to combat this eating habit, is to locate the source of the problem. Eating rarely if ever solves the problem that is causing the strong and usually negative emotion. Exercise, counseling, reaching out to others, and sometimes taking time to heal oneself are all great tactics. Once again keeping a journal of what triggers the emotional eating will help you get a better grasp on the problem at hand. NOW WE MOVE ON TO THE UNIVERSAL EATING HABIT ACCURATLEY NAMED HABITUAL (OR RITUAL) Eating: ITS JUST WHAT WE DO. I believe that most people indulge in this eating habit and the following are some examples of when we do it: You are going to the Football/Baseball/Basketball/Hockey game: Hotdogs, Chips, Beer, Liquor. You are going to the movies: Popcorn, Coke, Pretzels, Funnel cake, Pizza or whatever the concession item of your choice is. Its the Holiday Season: I must have all of the usual favorites: Grandma's turkey, Great Aunt's Caramel Cake, Your Spouse's Sweet Potatoes, Your Neighbor's Candy Yams, Christmas Punch, and so forth. The Girls Venting Session: must have Ice Cream of some flavor and LOTS of it and alcohol. The Birthday party: most have party favors and Cake. Men's night: Steaks, Burgers, Chips, Ribs, and Beer. You are bored and in the house doing nothing: Must. Eat. Whatever. Its just what we do. LOL. MOST of us do it and have been conditioned all of our lives to do it. This conditioning has been formed through family traditions, societal norms, peer influences, workplace etiquette, school related gatherings, church and community functions, and almighty MEDIA (just to name a few). The best solution to this is MODERATION. Also, start a new tradition of your own. When all else fails, before you eat something ask yourself the following ( I practice this daily): Are you hungry, have you eaten this lately, how do you feel, and what are you doing at this moment. I usually find that asking myself these questions leads to further questions and eventually to answers. I will either talk myself out of it or I will understand why I am doing it. MOST IMPORTANTLY, No man has ever survived without making mistakes, without setbacks, or without occasional over indulgence. It just happens. Do not beat yourself up about it. Just continue to move forward. You will only be as successful as you allow yourself to be. Surround yourself with supportive people, practice good habits, start new traditions, keep a journal, exercise, and ENJOY your second chance at life. You only live once.

I am a little over a week post-op and I am feeling great. The biggest change I feel is real strength around food. I was hardcore addicted and now my relationship with it feels so much closer to normal. This weekend my father in law baked homemade cookies while I was visiting. He loves baking and in the past I would have obsessed over them. The smell, then my thoughts would be consumed with "Should I eat one? No, I'm too fat I need to stop...but I deserve one...everyone gets the have them why deprive myself?" Then I would go eat 5 or 6 and send the rest of the night feeling guilty and beat myself up. Certainly no way to live! This weekend I smelled them an thought...oh that smells good. The end. No obsessing, no guilt...the cookies just rolled off my back. It is just so empowering. This really needs to stay. It freed my mind to think about life, family, the future etc... I am just thrilled I made this decision and need my strength to last. Things are looking up!