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Monday, July 15, 2013 Welcome back! Are you ready for your weekly beefy brief from your pudgy pundit? Ready or not, here comes another rant for the rotund. Let's start with a recap of the just past 4th of July holiday weekend. I will say it was a definite challenge! The old Johnny would have gained at least 5 pounds by feasting on ribs, burgers, fatty salads and sugary desserts during this fat-a-topia. I would have also had my Jimmy Buffet margarita maker working overtime rendering the frozen concoction that helps me hang on. Sunny summer holidays are the perfect excuse for gluttony of both food and drink. The good news is the New and Improved Johnny made it safely through this fat fest and actually lost 1-1/2 pounds. Whew! Let's get on with the NSV's. While a weekly weight loss is the ultimate goal, there are also other rotund rewards along the journey that are a by product of the weight loss. We call 'em Non Scale Victories. Hence the NSV. This comes from the fat ass secret code book. (Don't tell anyone I let you in on it.) I have had a few NSV's since I started my juggily journey. Mostly of the clothes variety. If we flashback to the day I got off the plane from Florida in early April, we will recall I was about 1 biscuit away from invoking my Level 3 emergency clothes protocol. That would have meant wearing only sweat pants and a moo moo. In other words, I was out of any wardrobe that I could wear out in public. Mercifully, I started my own pre-op - pre-op diet. My doctor wanted me to wait, but I didn't have an option. It worked. I was safely in my Level 2 fat wardrobe in a couple of weeks. I could work with this limited collection, so emergency averted. NSV number 1. In a couple more weeks, I found that my normal wardrobe (Level 1) was beginning to fit again. I was no longer gasping for air while wearing a tie and the threat of a sudden injury caused by a flying button from my pants had receded. I also found my golf shorts and casual shirts were no longer making me look like a stuffed sausage. I could feel the difference. NSV number 2. Then around the end of May, people started noticing that my fleshy face was starting to look smaller. I had a couple flabby friends ask me what me secret was. This made me take a good look at myself in the mirror. Wow! I could see the difference. I guess I was in a kind of fat fog and didn't pay attention. My body was changing. The good way this time. Another NSV. But I now I'm dealing with a couple unexpected consequences. Firstly, my golf swing has gone to hell. After 30 years of playing this stupid game, it's like I never swung a club before. My new, smaller body has really messed up my timing. Secondly, after 3 months of dieting and a loss of 38.5 pounds, my spiffy Level 1 wardrobe is starting to look huge on me. Seriously, I'm dressing up in my best stuff and it looks like I shop at Hobo Junction. People that don't know me are probably thinking my clothes are donated and I'm homeless. But I'm not complaining! These are GOOD problems. I knew the time for an intermediate wardrobe was coming. It kinda snuck up on me. I think I have another couple weeks at most with Level 1. Then it's on to the Marshall's and Steinmarts. I just need some cheap clothes to get me through to my final landing weight. Then I'll start the real restocking. So if you see a svelter looking guy in over sized clothing walking around, don't feel bad for him. It's either me or dieting hobo. Talk soon! Johnny reprinted from my blog: TheDeconstructionOfJohnny.blogspot.com Come and visit!

They say we didn’t gain all our weight overnight and therefore we shouldn’t expect to lose all the weight overnight. And as we get closer to our goal it gets harder and harder. It becomes a very frustrating thing. Then when we finally reach our idea weight, we have to maintain that weight FOR LIFE! No relaxing allowed. Because it will creep back on bit by bit. That is where I am at, I let my eyes do my measuring and bit by bit the sizes kept getting bigger….. Then I let myself make some not so good choices. Oh I can have a little of this and a little of that, I’m not trying to lose weight, just maintaining so it won’t hurt….. Guess what, I am pushing that five pound threshold that my doctor said I should keep. Yep up five pounds from my goal. Oh, I could sit here and say I don’t understand. I haven’t changed my eating or my exercise. But I did change things (slightly). A little bigger size of this and that. Extra treat here and there. Skipping on this exercise or that. It all adds up and at the end of the day I have gained five pounds over the last month. Now what, cry in my Wheaties? Nope, I get my a s s back on track. Weigh my food, eat my protein first, drink my water and exercise every day. And guess what, I will have to do this for the rest of my life. So for anyone thinking that the Band (or any WLS for that matter) is a quick fix, guess again! It takes change and lots of it, and it takes a lifetime commitment. I’m in it for life and bit by bit I will get these five pounds back off.

SURGERY Friday, JULY 12TH at 1:15 p.m. Home Saturday 5 p.m. It was frustrating to have to change surgeons and clinics, but now that I'm home recovering from my surgery, I couldn't be more pleased that it worked out like it did. Dr Smith and his staff and all the people involved in my care were excellent. I was at peace the whole time and felt protected and pampered and informed. My pre-op diet was not a big deal. I mean, I've been dieting for what feels like my whole life anyway. This time, it felt like a privilege. I feel like I'm getting a do-over. I'm getting a giant helping hand to get myself healthy and finally lose weight. Anyway, I drank two protein shakes a day then had a bowl of soup for one meal. I could have yogurt or popsicles for snacks but I only had yogurt once. There were a couple of days I had two bowls of soup instead of a snack. On Wednesday I went and got pre-admitted and had bloodwork done. That day and Thursday were my clear liquid days. I did better than I thought, except for dealing with bad heartburn. The time for surgery was set. My husband was home and ready to take me. He works in the oilfield so he had to get time off to come home for the surgery. He's been amazing. But I knew he would be. He's my biggest support. Friday we loaded up and headed to the hospital around 9 a.m. It's a two-hour drive from our house. We got there, I was pre-admitted, so they just checked me in. It took about 5 minutes till they were calling me back to pre-op. The nurse gave me what I needed to change into. I got on my gown, booties and hair cap. A few minutes later the nurse was putting in my IV. A little after that the anesthesiologist came in and introduced himself. My daughters and husband came back then to give me hugs and support and visit a few minutes before they took me to surgery. Within no time, they were wheeling me out to the operating room. Last thing I remember is the nurses that were guiding the bed and saying they were bad drivers. Then, I was out of it. I was told it took about and hour and fifteen minutes. I remember being semi-conscious and coughing (that was painful). But then I was out again for a little while, then started coming to. The pain wasn't bad at all when I regained consciousness. They said I coughed up a little blood when they took out the breathing tube. That's what I had remembered. My throat was a little sore, but not too bad. I had dry mouth but was told I'd just have to deal with that because I couldn't have anything at all in my mouth until after the swallow test the next morning. It was done. Everything went well. My hernia was just a small repair, taking one stitch. So after being in recovery about 30 minutes, I got to go to my room. There was my husband, daughters and parents waiting to see me. The nurses, techs, RT all introduced themselves. They made sure I was comfortable. I texted my other kids and some friends that everything went well. It was nice and relaxing. After a little visiting and making sure I was okay, everyone but my husband left. So about two hours after surgery it was time to get up. That wasn't too fun, but I made it. I was able to go urinate and then walked one lap around the floor of the hospital. The nausea was difficult at times but I never vomited. I was very thankful for the quick acting pain meds when I needed them. I was able to do the deep breathing with no trouble at all too. Every two hours or so I'd get up and walk and use the bathroom. Hubby and I just visited, napped, watched TV, as the nurses would come in and check vitals, give meds, change IV, etc. all through the night. I had to call and ask for pain and nausea meds only twice. My incisions aren't huge, but a little bigger than I thought they would be. I have five scars healing nicely across my abdomen. Saturday morning was restful and just tried to walk occasionally and stay comfortable. Around 9 am I got to do my swallow test. It went just fine. I was afraid to drink the barium, but there was no problem. It wasn't the best taste, but not too bad really. NO LEAKS! Then, I got my water. One ounce at a time, every fifteen minutes for four hours. If I drank too fast, I got nauseous, so I had to slow down. The doctor came in around 1 pm to see how I was doing. All good reports. So it was time to get checked out. Before I knew it, I was getting dressed, signing release papers, and walking out of the hospital. Now, the ride home was the worst part of my whole experience with surgery. I hadn't had a dose of pain meds since about 11 am. It's a two hour ride without traffic home, but, let me tell you, after abdominal surgery, you feel every single bump in the road!!! Plus, I had forgotten to pick up all my prescriptions before surgery so we had to make a side-trip to the pharmacy which took another hour. By the time we got home at 5 p.m. I was in pain, big time. I got to my recliner and that's where I've been most of the time. Our bed it tall, so I'm not going to try that till my belly isn't so sore. I took the pain medicine (liquid, thankfully), but didn't look at the measurement right and only took a third of a dose. Because of that it didn't help much with my pain. I was suffering and concerned, so I called my doctor to ask if it was okay to take a dose sooner than 6 hours apart. He okayed a dose four hours from the first. That's when I realized that I had not taken enough the first time and after the correct dosage, I was getting relief. I kept drinking, but only tiny sips. I took a dose of nausea medication with the next pain med dose, but haven't needed any more of it since. I'm taking the pain meds to help my body heal without stress. I got my cpap hooked up beside my recliner and then was able to get some pretty great sleep. Today, Sunday, has been really good. My sweet mother made my husband and daughter yummy meatloaf, veggies, banana pudding and cantaloupe and brought it over on their way to church. I am blessed! I'm more relaxed, walking around the house a bit, still feeling pain in the incisions but less than it was. I was able to take my liquid vitamins and opened my iron capsule, omeprazole capsule and vitamin D3 cap into the multi vitamins and took them together. I just put my b-12 sublingual under my tongue as I normally do, and chewed up my biotin dots. Then took my liquid antibiotic and a dose of pain meds. I was feeling pretty good and mixed up a unflavored, unsweetened protein powder in water. No problem at all. I just drank it an ounce at a time and gauged my tummy reaction. It was all good. About an hour later I had some beef broth. I think it gave me some gas. I took some gas X. I've ordered a bathroom scale and it should be delivered tomorrow. I think I've lost about 15 pounds since starting my pre-op diet. My belly already looks like it is deflating, Yeah! I'm so glad to be on to the next goal. That goal is to make it through the week of clear liquids and get some energy back and the surgery pain over with.

It's been a son of a biscuit few weeks. At work we have converted to a new software system and I am trying to learn it all the while, trying to make sure we are ready to start school in a month with 2500 kids and two campuses. This ain't easy!! I go home from work with a head ache and high BP each day. The only thing I want is a nap. For about two months now I have weighed between 187-189, daily weigh in. My NUT told me not to worry about it right now, that stress is keeping me from losing and right now my goal should be to maintain during this stressful time and then once things calm down I can start working toward losing again. My hubs tells me to go home and work out each day. He has been hitting the elliptical and weights hard the last few weeks and has dropped 2 lbs - proud of my boy! I know I to need to get back to exercise, without it further weight loss will not happen. I have never been a lover of working out, I rather work at something- yard work, cleaning ect. When I lived on the farm there was always work to be done- garden to pick, yard to mow and clean, feilds to work, cows to deal with, ect. Now as I live in the city my little .27 of an acre isn't keeping me as busy as the 100 acre farm I was raised on. I know must find some way to enjoy and maintain an exercise regiment. We have an elliptical and a total gym in our home and a greenway behind our house. I have no excuse, yet I always seem to find one. This week I am trying to go back to the basics. No eating out, eating clean and healthy. Also, I want to hit the elliptical at least 3 times this week. While I am proud of myself that during this 13 month journey I have managed not to gain, that isn't good enough. I still have about 45 lbs that I want gone. I will get there, just don't know when.

I almost finished my first one without stopping, it was so good. The chocolate shakes deserve 2 thumbs up in a Z formation! Very good taste, no grittiness. I like them better than the EAS chocolate carb control shakes. Although I do wish both brands were a little thicker. I've tried Muscle Milk, EAS, Pure Soy and Premier Protein chocolate shakes and Premier Protein has been the best for flavor and smoothness. Very yummy, almost as good as chocolate milk. Price wise, they are a little more expensive than EAS. EAS are 4 for $5 at Walmart. Premier Protien was 12 for $19 at Sam's Club (my Walmart didn't carry Premier). But as good as Premier tastes, I will won't mind paying a little more. I only wish Sam's had the Premier Protein bars as well - but they were sold out. Maybe next trip.

I jogged for the first time today since last Sept. It felt SO good. It was immensely easier without the extra 50 lbs and I was hardly out of breathe. I feel so strong and powerful. I jogged 2 miles without stopping then walked the rest of the half mile home to cool down. Dear Husband bought the XBox work out program for me and it was fun to 'play' last night - especially with the boys cheering me on. I'm going to work on these flabby abs and arms and also try yoga to get more flexible. (Was a gymnast in another lifetime ions ago.) My legs are looking awesome and my husband is all about my 'new' body! I'm down 31 since surgery, 50 since heaviest, only 2 lbs away from a huge, exciting mile stone - 200! I can't wait to be less than that tormenting number. I can't remember the last time I was below 200. Going to a get-together with work friends in two days. They haven't seen me yet, so a bit nervous/excited. Don't have a clue what I'll wear. I want to go shopping, but I'm afraid this flabby belly will keep in a huge size. I feel so optimistic for my future. My diabetes is basically GONE! The MS is behaving. I'm enjoying exercising again and I'm dealing with the food monster just fine. I'm going to recreate my body into what it should have been all these years. Life is good.

Last night as we sat down to dinner - me with my half cup of mashed potatoes and fat free refried beans and my husband enjoying the salad, grilled squash, baked potato and burgers made, of course, by me, I proceeded to have a pity party. I mentioned to my husband how crazy it is that three years and roughly $50,000 later( Thank God for insurance!) and I'm only 33 pounds lighter than I was on the day of my surgery. On I ranted about the past year of puking, eating less than 1,000 calories a day, of tracking my WW points and almost never eating my daily allowance... His response - "You need to exercise more!" Yes - that's the magic bullet...except that in six months of working out at the "Y" with 30-45 minutes of cardio I lost nothing despite restricting my intake. I haven't been working out much as the problems increased - frankly, on the little I was getting down, I needed a nap just to power through my day. Since I wasn't busting it at the gym, you'd think I'd be packing it on, but no, neither gained nor lost. Don't ya love it when someone who never had a weight problem and can eat whatever lectures you on what you should do? Like the waif nutritionist teaching a recent cancer survivors class I took....all of 23 and just out of school, she advised us all to, "Eat more fiber!", "Exercise More!" What set this off? I know I weigh less - my clothes tell me that, but catching a glimpse of myself in a full length mirror and I'm the same tug boat I was at 283 - same puffy toad belly, same cankles. Seems that 65 pound lost should look like something! Looking for the positive - I have less food related guilt. I no longer eat pizza. I don't buy snacks, candy, ice cream. I don't indulge in "binge" behaviors any more, so I don't have the weight of being "bad" on my shoulders. Unfortunately, I think I'm going to have to accept that I did this to myself and will wear this fat mantle until the day I die. Couple this with my mastectomy scarred chest and it's a wonder I ever leave the house!

When ever and what ever journey you take your are often inspired to take it by someone or something. I was inspired to have WLS due to several friends having it and having great results. Once banded I have been inspired by people right here on this site- Carolina Girl has done amazing, Missy Wowzer what a awesome job, AJ beautiful!! There are many others, but these are those that I look to and always want to read what they have to say, because I relate to them and are inspired by them and their words. Yeah some times my toes get steped on, but that means they are getting to me and will help me. In the 1 year time period I have had my band I went from 244 to 187. Yeah, people have lost twice that much in the same time period, but I didn't. I am a little jealous, would love to have done better, but I am me and am where I am and I am working on it. My journey brings to mind a song that the little kids at my church use to sing and it inspires me: "I am a promise, I am a possibility, I am a great big bundle of potentiality" - That line make me smile, because I know I have the possiblity and the potential to do whatever I set my mind to. It inspires me to work hard to get the things I want, like getting to goal. We all have to get our inspiration to work hard and continue the journey on the rough days from somewhere and something- there are people all around me that give me this. My hubs, the three amazing ladies above who inspire me with their post even if they don't know it, my mom who is always telling me how proud she is, my friends who are proud, and my body that feels better and doesn't get winded when I run up my stair case in my house. While I was lucky I never reached the point of having diffulity walking, I was getting there. My knees were begining to have pain. My ankles, both of which have been broken multiple times were crying out for me to lose weight. I am glad I finally was inspired to do this last year and I am thankful for all the place and people that inspire me to contiue this journey each and every day. Look around you today find your inspirations and smile- hold on to them so on a dark day you can whip 'em out and keep movin'.

It has been almos ten weeks since I was sleeved and I have been having frequent moments of thankfulness for this gift: My husband can wrap his arms around me when we hug My feet don't hurt anymore first thing in the morning so I don't hobble around My brain isn't so foggy at work I am gaining confidence I can tie my gym shoes without losing my breath I don't crave nor miss sweets My ankles aren't swollen at the end of the day every day So I bought some cute sandals and got a teal pedicure! My eyes look bigger and not "hooded" anymore So I bought new make up and feel beautiful (lovely husband says I have always been beautiful even - and especially - without make up. Love love love him!!!) No more buffalo hump No one has been negative I don't snore anymore (that one never gets old!) Not one migraine I have more flexibility I am more inclined to go to the gym My husband said I get up from the couch or bed faster and no longer use my arms to brace or balance myself (I never even realized I did that before) I feel younger My friends and colleagues have been so supportive and complimentary, which feels good My clothes are almost all too big, even the ones that were too small two months ago I am just so lucky and thankful for getting through the surgery safely, the first part of recovery that was so scary in the week after, having no complications and getting to this point. If I never lose another ounce, I am so much better off than I was before surgery for so many years. I am now 197 lbs and the size 16 clothes that I have are too big (I plan to go shopping this weekend). When my husband married me nine years ago I was 206 so he has never known me any smaller or healthier. He always said he wanted us to go running together but I never thought that could happen. Now it seems possible. I just signed up for a 5K in January 2014 and have started training for it already. That is a huge deal for me. I am not interested in perfection because that is unrealistic. I am happy to be healthier and to appreciate the mobility that I am gifting to my future golden years. I heard somewhere that thankfulness is essential for good mental health and happiness. So, I am truly grateful for my life and the second chance that I have been given to live it.