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I had the lapband just a little over 11 months ago and have lost 58 lbs. Most within the 1st 6 months. I am glad I did it, it has change how I look at food and what I put in my mouth. I do feel healthier, just wish my weight loss was more. I have made no secret about my anxiety disorder on this site. While I don't really like telling people around me about my disorder, I want this place to be my safe zone where I can discuss it. I am currently taking Paxel, which has changed my life, in the fact that I hardly have any symptoms of my disorder now- which is AWESOME!! I also, have discussed my difficulty in having a child. Prior to getting banded I had 3 miscarriages. The doctors never figured out the cause. Now, I have been given the green light from my surgeon to try for a child, I have to stop my Paxel. This worries me, the last thing I needs is my anxiety returning during pregnancy. My OB/GYN has is trying to transition me for Paxil to a different SSRI that is ok during pregnancy. Once I have been ok on that for a month or two I can go ahead and try. This being said, the hubs and I have decided to try one more time. With all the med stuff, we can't try until July or Aug, but we are going to try. I am not sure if it will take this time around or not. Honestly, I some what fear getting pregnant, in that I know I will gain weight and I don't want to gain weight, but I must for a healthy baby. So to that end I must be very careful and take good care of myself to make sure I don't gain any more weight than I need to. None the less I am excited about trying again and I know that with support and help whatever weight I do gain I can get back off once the little one is here. So please send a prayer up for me!!

So today was my 2nd day back at work. I went back yesterday and to prepare I brought: one 14 oz. GNC Lean Shake bottle, one thermos of chicken broth (halfway full), and one bottle of water). I almost finished the entire shake but it took me until the end of the work day to do it. The water intake went better and I took a few sips of the broth at lunch. Today I took the same thing and wow! I finished the entire protein shake by 10:00 a.m. I drank all the chicken broth at lunch, and right now I'm drinking a mixture of light grape juice, water, and Isopure flavorless powder mixed in. I may just get in all my protein today! Speaking of, I got the tub in the mail today. Well, a package didn't just randomly show up and I opened it. I ordered it off amazon.com because Isopure Flavorless Protein Powder was on sale and I read all the reviews and went for it. I went ahead and mixed it up and wow - I'm almost done with the glass of juice I'm having! Each scoop has 26 grams of protein! Can't wait to try it in soups, coffee, etc. So every day it's getting better. I still get the anxiety in the mornings, the feeling of crying, but it's getting less and less frequent. BTW, I'm 6 days post-op and start thicker liquids Friday.

Please take care of yourself! I know how you feel though - I'm only 6 days post-op but since the school year is ending I have to pack up my classroom and it's SO tempting to just pick up a few boxes here and there. I remind myself that no, it's not worth it and just wait on one of my teaching buddies to move things for me. Take care!

I get frustrated with the "bouncing of the scale" as well. I do feel like my head is starting to catch up with my body finally. It helps that my loved ones show me pictures of myself at 251 (YIKES)!! Go grab some old and new pictures...you will feel like a rockstar! One thing I tell myself everyday is...I have lost 52 pounds and have "kept it off" longer than I have kept off 10 pounds in the past. I honor my decision to do this as often as I can. We may never get to that PERFECT scale weight but honestly.....what is perfect? Today...I vow to feel perfect right now!

No good deed goes unpunished. (hope I got that right) Take care of yourself today.

I could have written the yo-yo part. Since February's fill I am down about 10 lbs but that changes daily within 2-4 pounds, too. I see the doctor Friday, but I am down. I figured this weight loss would take about 1 1/2-2 years. I have as a goal 170 but may want to be less. When I got married 42 1/2 years ago I was 144 with diet pills. During high school I was around 160-175, I think. Too many years ago to remember that weight. Sizes are weird. I wear a size 14 bottom and xl top at 191.6. In high school I was at least 20 pounds lighter and wore that size or a 16. The clothes manufacturers are playing mind games on us with sizes. I know my face is thinner, being 62, I see more wrinkles and I hate them but hub says beats being fat, He's right, just need lots of money for face lift, body lift etc. Great blog today, thanks. Arlene