Leaderboard

So last night I went to my first wls support group, I had missed the last meeting because I rather had worked out. I wish I just would have gone to the gym this time. It was forty minutes of how to handle stress and not that the information was bad, but it was a seminar not a support group. I really love this website where I can discuss my feelings and get feedback which is what I assume would be what a support group is suppose to be like. I did go work out at the gym and swim laps afterward but I just hate being bored or wasting my time. Well, at least I now know I am not missing anything, so maybe it wasn't a total waste. I think the most frustrating thing is when I don't lose weight as much as I would like. The scale is messing with me it is staying at 296 but I don't want to worry about it. I had my surgery on 8/29/12 so it's only been two months. I have never lost 44 pounds in two months in all my life, so I am heading in the right direction, the weight is coming off and my pants are loose. So my plan is to continue to lose weight and gain some patience with the process. The thing is I have spent so much of my life fat I want to live it healthy and at normal healthy weight but all good things will come in time.

Today I wish I was normal.Not only thin normal but not ADD or OCD and not I wish that I could take medication to "fix" me! All I wanted to do today was eat,all day long!I couldnt stop thinking about food for a minute.It was one of those me me me me days that I just hate. And I wish I lived in a country where it wasnt such a mission to find a therapist that is going to stay put.But we are all expats,habitual movers! Once I found a pill,for 2 weeks..lol.I went to my gp and said I am sick of myself and need something.He yanked a sample of Cymbalta out of his drawer and said try this and see me in 2 weeks,remember it only works after 10 days.After exactly 24 hours I knew that was what normal felt like.I was calm.My OCD was gone,my mind started focussing for the first time EVER!Didint have a 100 tracts playing in the head all at once!I could drive a car without it being a competition to see who wins,I could deal with life without the impending sense of doom and having to tell myself a million times a day that everything is fine,nothing to worry about.I slept a full night for the first time in my life and most important,my fear of people all but disappeared. Then my kidneys function started being affected but I couldnt care less.After 10 days I could hardly walk but happy as I have ever been.Said they would have to wressle the little suckers out of my stone cold hand after my death.He just didnt give me a perscription and that was the end of that! Lol I have been a born again Christian for 15 years now and the Lord have really changed me since then.But I am still me and non of the things I have considered very important like the above mentioned,have changed.I suppose there were so many other things that needed change that this might not even have made the list.I really love the Lord and I know He loves me but boy I wish He would renew my mind more! But He clearly has a plan for my life.And He clearly smiles patiently upon me when I tell Him to hurry up and change me more NOW! Accepting ourself,warts and all, might be so important in a successful future with the sleeve.I am blessed beyond measure in so many aspects of life that I should be able to say its ok to be me.Its ok to not be perfect,its ok! Well,it is the middle of the night now and close to my bed time.Tomorrow,or just now..hehehe...is a new day.I can put this one behind me,live just for the new one,not worry about the future and breathe. God is good all the time and maybe I dont really need that pill.

just spent 45 mins typing an update and poof, when i tried to preview it and edit a word it dissapeared basically, still waiting for blood test results, really fed up of waiting, not got my hopes up to have my op in november any more. Today i have cast my cares on the Lord and will have my op when He gives me the date, He knows best. I know i still want my sleeve, and will restart the liver shrinking diet when i have a new date for my sleeve. I am not concerned if it is just before christmas, any time soon will be ok with me, i was motivated and ready for oct 9th and can do it again, but this time without the problem of my blood it will be safer. Hope everyone is doing well, sleeved or to be sleeved, God Bless, xx

Sitting on my bed at the INT hospital in Tijuana. Feeling the stress. It's 10:30pm, officially no more fluids by mouth. Pre op tests tomorrow morning. Surgery around 10:30 am. Stressed. Can't watch tv, can't concentrate. Wish i was at the hotel instead of here, i would have relaxed more... As it stands, i'll get 3 nights in a hospital bed, not my fave'! So far nurse took my vitals, a young dr came and introduced himself to me as my overnight doctor. I don't see why i,d need him though... Well i took some sleeping pills so we'll attempt sleep, i just wish i was sharing a bed with my husband tonight!

Also, note that in a standard size serving of Bailey's (not including if you add milk to it) there is about 1/4 of the calories most of us are told to have in a day. If you are having 2 (assuming they aren't larger than this size) that is more than half the calories we should have in a day. That could be a big culprit drinking so many calories. Original Irish Cream (Bailey's) Serving Size: 3.38 oz (100 ml), Calories: 327, Fat: 13g, Carbs: 25g, Protein: 3g

I have noticed from others that sometimes after being banded for a while, it is easy to forget or stray from the original guidelines or some banders didn't get adequate information from their centre initially. For starters, I would log what you are eating (ideally through myfitnesspal or something like that that will track calories too). You should not exceed (per my doctor) about 1200 calories per day and should have about 60+ grams of protein. Try not to exceed 1 cup of food per meal and have a planned healthy snack in between meals (piece of fruit) or something. If you are not able to get even yogurt down, perhaps your band is a little too tight which may be causing you to eat some unhealthier items (sliders) that will go down easily and that may be part of the problem. It sounds like you could really benefit from a visit (or 2) with a nutritionist to get back on track. You shouldn't feel so defeated and frustrated with your food choices. I am able to eat most anything as long as I eat slowly and eat small bites. I would urge you to see out one (my bariatric clinic has ones on staff) and they have a lot of great ideas and advice. I truly don't feel deprived and only did when I was too tight and struggled getting solid food down. I also have found healthier ways to still enjoy many foods I loved before but now in a healthier way. There is a website called Emily bites (I believe) and there are many recipes that you make in cupcake pans so they are portioned out into appropriate sized meals. They are healthy versions (ie. lasagna) of everyday foods. I really enjoy them. Good luck to you!

Amazing! Congratulations! I can't wait to experience what you are feeling.

I can totally understand your frustration and the waiting period can be daunting as we are all excited to start our journey. Try to be patient. It will come. You have dealt with your weight probably for a long time... what's a few more days. You DO belong. You are welcome and knowledge is power so it is good that you are on here even if you are not quite "there" yet.