Leaderboard

A year ago, I would look at people who are the size I am now and think, "Oh, what I would give to be that size!". I just knew I would be full of confidence and that my self esteem would be flying high again. But, now that I am where I was striving to be a year ago (not thin but no longer obese), I'm still not happy with my body. Is this becasue society has told us what is beautiful so many times that we start to believe it? Or, is it much more simpler than that. Is it just that I'm not happy with my body as a whole? Why am I minimizing my success in my head? I know I'm not sabotaging myself, but I also know that when I look in the mirror now, there are parts of my body that I dislike even more now that I've lost weight. Now, before everyone blows up at me, let me explain. I am 110lbs smaller than I was a year ago and aroun90lbs smaller since surgery six months ago. I can look and feel my body and I KNOW it has made tons of positive changes. i also know that even though I mess up with my food intake some times, I have made huge strides in that area as well. For example, this time of year in the past I would have had bough four bags of candy just for my husband and I. To be honest, I ate 3 1/2 of those! Now, I've been very careful. If I do eat a mini bar, it's only one or two for the day and then no more for awhile. I've learned that apples and peanut butter can taste just as good as a Reese's Cup....well, not AS good....but close enough. Plus, the apple doesn't make me feel bad about eating it when I'm done. I also try to exercise when my back will allow. Another huge step. As for my body changes, the pouch over my "lady parts" is so much smaller that when I'm using the bathroom, I marvel that I can see certain parts again. (Sorry if that's TMI). I can now see the numbers on the scale with out having to bend my body all cockeyed when I weigh myself. My arms feel like little girls arms to me when I fold them across my chest and the best part is the way I fit into the area under my husband's arm when he puts it around me. For the first time, his arm goes all around me and can even go down part of my arm. For the first time ever, i feel like I can be that comforted woman in the arms of the man she loves. But, with all the good comes the bad. My boobs continue to try to make their way to the floor. If they continue on their trip, they will be there in a few months and I can turn them into cleaning tools as I walk around the kitchen floor!!! Also, they are much smaller, and I have to admit, I REALLY miss them. (If you read my blog lots, you can see that I say this all the time...I have always had a close relationship to my boobs!!! LOL). The skin under my lady parts and between my thighs continues to look like a bull dog's jowls. My tummy is now wrinkled and I can fold areas of skin and fat over on it. My arms have wings and to really just shock me, I noticed today that my face skin is hanging a little too. I swear, I know it's Halloween, but I do not have any desire to look like a walking melting wax figure!!!!! So, I did what I do and asked myself, "Which would you prefer? Who you were six months ago or who you are now?" No question, hands down, The PERSON I AM NOW!!!!. So what's the problem you may ask? It's simple. I've been overweight my whole life and I always thought that if I lost weight I would have a killer body. But, becasue of my age and the length of time I've been fat (not to mention the inability to exercise the way I would like), my body didn't get my brain's memo and can't just fall back into place.....right now, it can only "fall". Because of this, it adds some negative thoughts in my head about how I look. Now, I know only I and my husband can see my body....and I'm lucky that he loves it the way it is.....but every person I know wants that tight, chest up, butt up, tones arm look!! But for now, I will have to rely on Spanks and the right clothes to hide all these changes....and trust me, I don't mind one bit.

Today is the day the Lord has made. Let us rejoice and be glad in it!!!! Hello all....as stated in my previous entries - I am still not smoking and very proud of myself! For the past two days I have had a lot of energy. Yesterday I went to my first post op appointment and previous to that I went to get my hair done. I was so busy moving around all day that I did not drink as much as I should have. The doctor checked my tongue and was able to tell....he said that the whiter it is ...the more fluid you need!!!! Other than that, the incisions are healing fine and I feel better and better every day. My blood pressure was 135/95 while at my doctor visit. I have not taken any of the medication for BP since the surgery so I crushed and took one when I got home. The last two days it has been in the normal range without additional medication. THIS IS WHY I AM SLEEVED. I already feel healthier and more energetic. Can you image when I become a pro at eating and drinking, fully healed, exercising, etc. WOW!!! Today I went to early vote with my son! This is his first year being of voting age with a major election. It took all of 10 minutes and I was so proud of him for getting out there and exercising his right to vote. So after voting, I took my car into the shop to get some warranty work done before it expires...lol and routine maintenance. The good thing is that my dealership provides loaners so I didin't have to wait on it so I came back home and cleaned a bit......did a bit of laundry, made the bed, light work. ENERGY!!!! Now what is really exciting to me is that on Saturday, I can start eating the cream and blended soups - I am looking forward to more flavor! I am not "afraid" to drink anymore and sometimes drink a little too fast and have to wiggle around for the slight discomfort to go away. I bought a nutriblender (made by the magic bullet folks) a few weeks ago so I am looking forward to trying it out starting this weekend. My liquid diet and surgery happened so quickly that I have not been able to use it as initially planned. I will definitely post again once I use it and let you all know if it is something worth your while and if anyone reading this has one....let me know what you think about it. It's time for bed but thanks for reading and allowing me to be a part of such a great community!

My Lap-band is a great tool for my weight loss journey, if only I could band my head. How many times have we thought that? I read it on threads all the time. Well, we can band our head. In fact I have a Banded Brain Tool and it’s called SUPPORT. It comes in all different shapes and sizes. My Banded Brain Tool consists of five things: Cheerleaders – these are my family and friends who from the sidelines are cheering me on. It’s my hubby seeing me struggle and walking up to me whispering in my ear, “You are doing so incredible on this journey, I’m so proud of you.” Or my friends saying, “You look great!” Support Group – My support group meets once a month. Seeing fellow bandster, exchanging stories and ideas gets me from month to month. LapBandTalk – I log on every day, check in with my friends, help and support other bandsters as well as get help and support. MyFItnessPal – Keeps me honest with my food intake and my friends offer help and ideas here too. FitBit – My pedometer on steroids! I never though one little electronic devise would get me climbing stairs every day. It sends me emails when I earn a new badge (never forget the first day I climbed 50 flights – I was a dancing fool). I compete with my friends to see who can walk the most steps and we encourage each other one. Between my Lap-band and Banded Brain Tool I have been able to succeed with my weight loss.

I WAS JUST WONDERING WHERE IS THE PORT AT IN YOUR STOMACH,,,IS IT ABOVE BELLY BUTTON,,ON THE SIDE OR UNDER BELLY BUTTON,,, JUST NOW THOUGHT TO ASK THAT QUESTION ANY ANSWERS WOULD BE APPRECIATED,,, AND IS IT CLOSE TO THE SKIN???

I agree support is the brain tool. At first I thought I was missing so darn much when now I look back and I am not missing a darn thing except trash I was putting in my body every day.

My port is above my navel. It is deeper under the skin than I originally thought. When I went for my frist fill, I was surprised how deep it was.

Hi Suzanne, I am chiming in. I will be 57 next week and will be Banded for 2 years (this weekend) at goal for one month and 2 weeks. lapband gave me my life back, or maybe I should say, I gave me my life back by getting a lap band. I have learned to eat healthy and actually feel good about myself for the first time in a very long time. As for throwing up, yes some people do but the majority that throw up have issues with the band or cause it by not chewing their food or eating to quickly. Pills go down without a problem, you just need to swallow one at a time. I do chewable vitamins, consider these my treat for the day. I suggest you go to your consult an attend one of the local free seminars in your area so you can ask questions, seeing successful people helps. But WLS like everything else is not cure for obesity. The only person who can make you lose weight is you, will lose in the beginning just by having surgery but for the long haul if you want to get to your goal be prepared to work hard. Good luck, this is a great supportive group currently so your coming to the land of the banded at a good time.

Do what you are supposed to do and you will be just fine, been banded for over a year and my only regret is not being banded sooner.. I have a new leash on life -- I feel 18 again.. lots of energy and never hungry,, remember chew chew chew all your food and you will be fine... just stop when you feel full. I soon will be 51 in November and I feel like a million dollars. Good luck on your journey. God Bless.

That is a very scary thought but I guess there is nothing I can do except be very careful like you all have said. Thank you Cheryl for hope!

I think it's time to set some goals for myself. I've been thinking about what they would be and how much weight I need to lose a lot lately (duh). I think the hardest part is coming up with realistic rewards for myself. First Goal: 25 pounds Reward: Mani/Pedi Progress: Achieved! Mani/Pedi scheduled for today! Second Goal: 50 pounds Reward: Spa Day! Massage, Facial, Mani and Pedi Progress: 25 pounds to go! Third Goal: 75 pounds Reward: NEW CLOTHES! Progress: 50 pounds to go! Fourth Goal: 100 pounds Reward: Vacation! Kidless. Just the hubs and I. Mexico? Progress: 75 pounds to go! Fifth Goal: 125 pounds Reward: Bikini Progress: 100 pounds to go! ULTIMATE GOAL: 150 POUNDS Reward: Whatever the hell I want! haha Progress: 125 pounds to go!