Leaderboard

"You're only nineteen." "You don't need to have surgery." "Losing weight isn't impossible. If I can do it, anyone can." "How is it even possible to not lose weight." Sometimes not everyone understands another's decisions. Which is totally rational. Not one person has gone through the same thing as another. In my eyes that gives no one person grounds to judge another person on their decisions. I am nineteen. This is true. But what makes my surgery so much more taboo than another person's surgery? What makes my surgery different that a girl my age getting a boob job, or a nose job? I can't do something to benefit my health, and my over all apperance? To create something better for myself; No matter what the cost. I understand why people believe I shouldn't get this surgery. I get it. I'm young. But the great thing is that I am having a procedure done, early on in my life, that will teach me about the lifestyle change I have to make. In order for me to live a healthy, happy life I believe that I need to have this done. Not only because I know I will be more confident, but I will be able to step away from being a prediabetic as well as my sleep apnea. I used to dream, as a little girl, of what it would be like to feel pretty. To be comfortable. To walk around in my own skin and not feel like I was disgusting. Somedays I didn't want to leave the house. I felt repulsive. I felt like it would be better for the world, and myself if I just didn't go to class that day. No one would have to look at me, and I wouldn't have to look at everyone else...looking at me. For whatever reason. I know that this deicision is the best thing I could do for myself. I know that because I am young, I can change my whole life because of this. And I'm excited for it. I am excited for the new me. I deserve it. My surgery date is October 10, 2012. I am so unbelieveably excited to start my life.

Well, it is four months today since my surgery!!! Before surgery (April 13) I was 297.7 with a BMI of 45.3. The day of surgery (June 4) I was 283.8-BMI 44. I am now 224.5- BMI 36.2. SOOOOO,I have lost 59.3 since surgery, I have lost a total of 73.2 in 6 months. I did follow up blood work with my PCD, she took me off blood pressure and cholesterol meds. I am also of metformin, I still have to manage my diabetes but only with diet and exercise. Speaking of exercise--I actually like exercising!!!!! funny huh! I had to get in a good routine, I had to make sure exercise is like a perscription med, I must take everyday in order to feel better. Because I travel so much the Y works best for me, whatever city I am in, I go to the Y. I try to make sure I do an hour 3-5 days a week. I am scared because I have tried sampling everything, and I can eat everything, such as fried foods, haven't tried pizza or sweets, those are my weakness. I have decided to not to eat bread, the pasta I eat is whole wheat organic pasta. I am loving salmon, talapia, and halibut!!!! Mixed veggies!!! Also I stopped eating red meat. But my hair is falling out sooooo freaking bad!!!! I take all my vitamins, b12, calcium and vitamin. I bought some biotin 2 weeks ago. Still hair falling out. So my doc told me to increase my protein by eating a steak or something. I told my husband, he was so happy. LOL he was getting so sick of of fish, chicken and turkey. so he made the best steak I ever had!!! still cannot eat a whole meal so I shared with my daughter. I have not told anyone. Only my husband and daughter knows. I still get negative comments from my family after they see the loss. "oh you have lost too much!! you look like you on drugs!!! I know your husband don't like that!!! Stupid stuff like that makes me just want to stay away!! I have better encouragement from people I work with. Thats sad, but hey you cannot pick your family. Because all of my 24/26 and 4x are falling off of me, I had to get new clothes. So I just bought a couple of things. I am in a 16w and 1x---HELL FREAKIN YEAH!!!!!! You should have seen my happy dance in the dressing room!!!! My daughter has stressed me about wearing a dress, I have not worn a dress in almost 3 years. So I tried on a dress, I still don't like how I look in dresses, still fat on my legs and I have still have my rolls. I am not doing weights for my arms and legs. What can I do for my stomach? I know to do crunches/sit ups but is there a better way to do them that works? Also any suggestions with my hair loss? I go to the beautician every 2 weeks. I get my perm every 6 weeks. I think I need to take a break and get some braids. my doc says to lay off any perms or treatment because my hair will stop falling out around the 6 to 8 month mark. I am a black woman that cannot go natural, I don't have patience for the process of growing out my perm. I am headed to get a perm today, lol.

Go here---> Batteries not included

And it saddens me so. I wish that I could say that things are going the way they should be and that I have been banded, but I haven't and it still looks like I'm going to have to wait a year or more. And that isn't a good thing. I have given up in a sense. I have gained weight and I can't seem to get modivated to do anything about it in the mean time. I need to start working out to slowly start taking off the weight so that I don't reach 300lbs. I just don't know how it got so bad. I wish that my insurance covered the surgery or at least helped out. Ty doesn't seem to care, and that makes me think that he doesn't care if it happens or not, which makes me more depressed about the whole situation. I wish we could find a co-signer to help with the CareCredit but I guess I will just have to wait. Other news though... which is great news... I'm ENGAGED! Ty proposed to me about a month and a half ago while I was visiting him in San Diego. Super excited. We won't be married though for a few years, because I want to lose weight before hand. Until next time. Shel *I guess I'll have to fake it 'til I make it*

Just had my first post surgery protein shake. A day or so ago, my husband and I went to GNC and stocked up on different types of protein powder. Different brands, flavors, some no-sugar-added, some fast release, some slow release, some "meal replacement" powders which include fiber. The GNC guy said casein is a slow-release protein. This particular brand I tried today makes a thick mixture with water. I like that. Pre-op I was drinking Amp Extreme 60 (very tasty!) which mixed thin with water and slightly thicker with water. I like the feel of more body in the drink. So powders are different, and I'm glad I bought a variety to try. Been faithful with my two 10-minute daily walks: one right after I wake up and one after dinner. I got the 10-min regular schedule idea from <The Expert's Guide to WEIGHT-LOSS SURGERY by Garth Davis, MD.> Good Book. I feel fortunate not to have any problems drinking. This would be a lot harder, otherwise. Prayers and thoughts to all those out there whose stomachs aren't as accommodating as mine. Hopefully, you'll get more tolerance with time.