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Hi all..New to this site. Let me introduce myself. My name is Elizabeth and I am 48 years old. Been married for 30 years (in April) I am a night L&D nurse. Have struggled with my weight all my life..I know just like most of us have LOL! Today is the beginning of week 2 post op for me. I have my sleeve placed on 8/29/12. I was in the hospital for 2 very long nights. It started of as a early day getting to the hospital at 0530, surgery start time was 0730. Met with my surgeon and my anesthesia guys that I was fortunate to pick ( I am a nurse at the hospital). So I know I was in good hands. Being a nurse does have it advantages but in my case I was really nervouse because I know just a little to much about what goes on LOL. Anyway, I was given Versed before going to the OR..It is a med used to relax you, which I needed. Only remember being in the OR for maybe 3 minutes and the rest is a blank... Woke up in recovery with only a quick second of feeling nauseous and that was it. I was in recovery for about 5 hours while they tried to get the previous patient out of my room hehe Why would anyone like to stay longer than they have too? Moved to my room and did really well. My doctor does not believe in his patients being in pain and gave me meds round the clock and then extra was available if needed. After day one I had to do a swallow study and I passed thank heavens..My mouth was as dry as a desert. Started off with 1 oz of water for 4 hours, then 2 oz for 4 hours then I could drink as much as I could tolerate...I have to say that first sip of water was the best water I have ever tasted.. Been doing really well the first week. Kind of tired from no rest at the hospital ; / Still sore but getting better by the day. Have had no problems with nausea or vomiting. I do have to say that yesterday I had a weird experience. I took my dog to training for the first time since surgery. I was there for maybe 10 minutes and all of a sudden I got the worst stomach pain, broke into a cold sweat and had to leave. I didnlt know if I was going to be sick or worse...the other end...TMI? Barely made it home and since I have been kind of queazy. had some SF pudding last night and I tolerated it well..This AM I am feeling the same, just kind of queazy, crampy like... I am so looking forward to eating a soft diet, I go back to work next Wed night. I want to start eating a little before going back to work to make sure I tolerate it OK.. Looking forward to getting to know everyone and sharing their VGS journey with them... Much love, Elizabeth

Today I'm 7 days from my one year anniversary of being a Loser and I'm still learning my body. Just this past weekend: I've come to terms with myself that my eating habits have changed. I get angry because I want to eat more but I can't because my sleeve is full after 3 or 4 bites and by the time my stomach has settled, I don't want it anymore. I need to learn to cook in smaller portions. When we order take out, we can share one dish or I should order something others will eat because I never eat more than a handful. I shy away from dining with others because I'm done before everyone else so I sit there looking at a full plate of food waiting for the everyone else to finish. Also, something that never use to happen, now, I KNOW, I'm leaving with a doggy bag! Thing I use to love to have I don't anymore, things I want to have I can't. I no longer love chicken. I can eat a few bites and then call it a day. When I see pasta's, mac and cheese, lasagna, spaghetti, I'd love to have it! BUT I no longer can tolerate pasta. STILL love, love, love ice cream/frozen yogart, cookies, cakes and salads...BUT the sweet stuff ....and something about lettuce is like a laxative to me. Once eaten it only takes 3 minutes to hit my sleeve and send me running. (Literally!!) I've come to terms with myself that I must take vitamins daily. When I miss them for more than 3 days, I'm runned down and useless. I don't sleep well and I have no energy to do anything. I've come to terms that my weightloss will be slow and NOT always steady, that now, I need to work out more to get faster weight loss results and to tighten up and build muscle. I've come to terms that with my loss, I will have some saggiing skin and I will need to make a decision in the future if another surgery is something I want to do. AND, today I've learn to listen to what my body is saying...and go with it. I can't stay with old habits good or bad, if my body says go left, then left is where I'm heading. This is an exciting and frustrating time but I'm sure some day soon, I will master me once again.

Thought I'd be nervous...but I really feel that I got that all out of me...I'm ready to go!!!! Psyched out!!! No worries! I even found Special K protein powder for water, and Designer Whey protein powder for water--Designer has 10 g, and K has 5...at Rite Aid...they have the Isopure too, that I have been looking for. I found it all while I was waiting to find out of that particular pharmacy has the Hydrocodone liquid. No place has the pain killer. It's on back order, and there is talk of not making it anymore, so I'm not sure why on Earth the doctors are prescribing it! Be aware that if you get prescribed a pain med, that it is hard to find. Get it early, and start filling it early. I got extra walks in this week, and a double one just a couple hours ago...so that I am ahead for the recovery days. Sweet! Went to a support group meeting today...the one chick there talked and talked and talked...but I did learn some things from her...though I really wanted to talk about some of my last concerns. Toward the end I was able to get in that I was getting my surgery in the morning, and then I got to chat with some people who had some very good tips...such as the one woman who had her surgery in May, right before I was supposed to have mine, showed me her incisions and told me that, Yes...I will still be able to yell at my children when I get home. That's all I needed to hear! I was worried I'd be layed up like a sick dog..but not so. The other woman had her sleeve 17 days ago, and has lost 15 lbs...which she was not happy about...but which is encouraging, and right on target. I have all my medicine cups, some antacids, gas med, prescriptions, a can of meat and beans, a can of applesauce, a can of tomato soup, and a can of cream of chicken soup along with the protein powder packets I just got, and the Carnation sugar-free packets all lined up on the counter. We moved the couch, vaccuumed and moved the recliner so that I can have my pick when I get back. I put my sewing projects for Eckley on hold (that's a coal mining patch town that still stands, where we volunteer to raise money--you all should visit, sometime). I just don't have time to do those things. I figure when my belly gets better at the end of September, I can sew then, I hope. I can't wait to get back to my walks! The treadmill is up here now, and I cleaned it off, so I can walk inside if I want to, now, and for the winter!...NO slacking for me...never again. I refuse to be a hermit this year! My daughter and I are also going to do our aerobics together. We did some Zumba at a support group meeting two weeks ago..and boy-o-boy, was that something! We were all cracking each other up with the moves, and it was just a lot of fun...so now, we are going to work out together more. I can't wait....my girl is the best...so is my boy! My two special buddies are right here alongside me...like no one else. I should mention my one friend, Annette...she's being very nice to me, and helping me get there and back...but that's all she can do..and it's A LOT!!!...but still...I need help at home...and will have to rely on the children. I wish I had more family, and more people who really care about me. I am so thankful for what I have though, and wouldn't trade my 3 buddies for anything! Travis Tritt is on tv right now..and man is he spectacular...love him...I'm really enjoying his concert! Sure beats eating my self to death, right now! Tomorrow is such a special day, and I'm so glad I get to share it with you all!

When I was 19, I was interested in this guy, who flatly told me I wasn't his type due to my size. I was so pissed by another rejection, that I started walking the next morning. Six months later, I was working out twice a day, lost 55 - 60 pounds and was a size 6, then I got arrogant. It started innocently, I had a slight knee injury. I was squatting 150 lbs and was not paying attention to form and I pulled something, but I wasn't worried because I would never be "fat" again, so I took time off from the gym. Couple months later I was a size 10, but that was okay, I was too skinny anyway and I will take it off, when I got back to the gym. However, I was never that committed as before and the weight just kept creeping on. What I remember about that time is my belief that I could continue with my eating habits because I was skinny. I really believed I did not have a food problem. I had become an exercise freak and I was so caught up in the attention I was receiving that I didn't see the cliff until I had already fallen. 13 years of imbedded bad habits and I'm trying to look at every loophole, for the fear of re-gain is so strong. I know that this time around with the lap band and a therapist (yep, I found one) and my eyes wide open the result will be different, but that fear is so strong, it's suffocating. I read somewhere that we cling to things because it gives us some type of payout. I honestly do not know the reason behind my food addiction but hopefully with time it will become clear because I refuse to continue to live my life this way. I'm no coward, I plan to face my demons but tonight the fear of failure is thick in me. For today, I finalized my financing, the surgery date is set but not finalized so it's like my mind is freaking out... I went to the grocery and had an instant craving for pork rinds! I NEVER ate the thing but today I felt like trying them, so I left the grocery so fast, still had some cup cake but yep, can't wait to see the therapist, this MADDNESS has to stop.

OK so first blog ever hope you all enjoy. I have been on this journey since April and my insurance just approved me yesterday WOOT!!! Now I have my endoscopy and things tomorrow. Everything seems to be moving so fast and I am getting anxious and nervous but thanks to my hubby and friends from work and my sleeve buddy also a co worker who have supported me along with friends I know I will be ok. I am ready to start this new journey in my life and ready to do the things I have always wanted. Socially I am ok and really dont care what others think outside of my circle. This is something I want to do for my children and I know there will be ups and downs and lots of emotions. I know magic isnt going to happen overnight but I know with hard work and dedication I will be able to achieve my goal weight and keep it there. I just want to document my journey through photos so I can see the improvement. I have read tons and tons of material and know that im not gonna drop 100 lbs in 3 weeks or something crazy like that. I plan on setting realistic goals for myself and helping and achieving them all. Thank you all for reading this.

today I will take some pictures for the first time post op.Its been 5 and a half months now that I've still been avoiding the pics. My kid took some the morning of surgery (and some the morning after). I might even post them if I can see a difference.Being very body dismorphic doesnt make life easy.I have to see myself with my mind and not really my eyes as my eyes still see me almost exactly the same,but with a lot more wrinkles and drooping skin.My head tells me 88 pounds is a significant weight loss. S,lets see how brave I can be!