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As always, I have made my neighbors wonder how I ever got out of the mental institute. At least this time, I didn't flash some poor, unexpecting man my boobs...though he really did seem to enjoy that. No, today I did that thing that we all do sometimes when we are working out. I forgot I was in public. Not only was I in public, it was 7am and there were TONS of people out walking (their dogs or themselves). Before I went on my 2mile walk (yes, two miles...thank you...thank you...thank you...you can hold your applause now LOL) I decided to add some old CDs that I had found to my phone so that I would have something different to listen to as I walked. Great idea right? This would help motivate me, get me moving a little faster, and help keep me walking more than I have been. Well, that's all true. EXCEPT one thing....I forgot how much I enjoyed some of these tunes. So, not only was I singing along as I walked (I tried to stop when I saw someone coming), I was also doing that upper body dance thing with my arms....you know the one right? It's when you start moving your arms and bobbing up and down?! But, that wasn't the worst part, the worst was when I decided to get my legs involved. Apparently, I didn't think putting one foot in front of the other was good enough. Nope, I thought it would be neat to do a little side step ever once and a while....as well as some some back and forth foot work. This wouldn't have been too bad except I got caught BIG time. Not just by the person in front in me walking their dog, but also by the man driving behind me. I have no idea how long either one was there. The BEST part of the whole thing was watching the man walking directly toward me get the look on his face as to say, "what is wrong with her" and ever so slowly cross the road for no other reason to get away from me. And yes, I made sure to say, "Hello" as I passed. I thought about stopping and petting the dog, but I didn't want to be sprayed with mace. LOL After being caught twice in a matter of seconds, I decided that I should stop my dancing and focus on walking. That was all well and good until "Brown Eyed Girl" came on. Something took over and I was unable to control myself. The words came pouring out of my mouth and my arms and shoulders started going. That is until I noticed an older woman walking her dog and another man attempting to control his dog. It was barking and attempting to break away in an attempt to get to me...and it didn't appear that he wanted to give me lovings. Apparently dogs are not very fond of my singing ability. Damn, and I was planing on auditioning for the Voice next year....LOL. Now that I am home, safe and sound. I have decided that going for my walk in the morning is not the best idea. I think I will leave the walking to the afternoon or evening when there are less people out there to scare. I mean come on, I've got to maintain some type of normalcy....or at least pretend to. Now excuse me as I go turn up Price and dance around the house like the Dancing Queen I (think) am.

I've been trying to implement change in my life. It hasn't been easy. My sub-conscious isn't going down without a fight! It's been really hard to fight the urge for carbs, but I took a huge step today by eliminating most of them from my cabinets. I did some shopping over the weekend and again, it was really hard to fight the carb monster. Oh, my favorite macaroons are fresh out of the oven? NO! RESIST! Free sample of my favorite pizza? STOP!! GET AWAY FROM ME!! Toaster Strudel on sale!? YOU BASTIDS! And then it was like a light bulb went off (dimly, still working on it), and I realized that Toaster Strudel is probably a great representation of my overall diet choices. Easy, sweet, reminiscent of fruit (but not actual fruit) and comes with an icing packet so I can feel like I contributed to my meal prep. How terribly sad and ridiculous is it to live like that?? So, instead I've been implementing some changes. I've been trying out protein shakes as meal replacements, and so far it's going great. I've been enjoying Muscle Milk, vanilla creme and chocolate are all I've tried, and playing around with flavors. I have some sugar-free chai mix, some extracts and sugar-free syrups that have made it a little more fun. I've been using the ready-to-drink variety of muscle milk and am nervous about buying the big canister. Does it taste the same? Anyone know about this? Also, I've discovered Greek yogurt. Never used to be a yogurt fan, but never tried Greek yogurt since it became "the thing". "If I don't like the regular kind, why would I want the Greek kind?" I'd rationalize to myself like an idiot. It's amazing! I really like Fage the best, but have been settling for Oikos because it's been on sale for the last 2 weeks at my local store. Of all I tried, Fage peach is my hands down favorite. So I've been replacing a meal with yogurt. Well, not the WHOLE meal. I used to buy lunch at the cafeteria at my work, which is usually some double portion carb mess covered in gravy, or a super salty soup with pre-made caesar salad on the side and a big sugary lemonade. Now, I bring a yogurt, some cheese slices and have bottled water instead of the lemonade. I'll get a soup or fresh fruit from the caf if I'm hungry, but I'm usually not. All the extra protein is really making a difference in my appetite! So that brings us to the point in my day once I'm home. I live alone. I have no one to shame me or call me out for making bad choices. That's part of why I'm glad to purge my cabinets. I'll have to use all my willpower not to re-purchase those things, but not having them here is a huge step. When I'm home and ready for dinner, I have a Lean Cuisine. Not the best, but it's portion controlled and easy. Living alone=having all the chores and cooking and cleaning is not how I want to spend my time... half way through cooking the meal, my back will start to ache. Then by the time I'm done and have sat down, ate, food coma sets in, cleaning up is the last thing on my mind. I'm really hoping that losing some weight will give me energy back to DO CHORES. I feel like I'm so gung-ho about changing my diet, that part has been easy, actually, but I have no drive whatsoever to be physically active. I really want that to change. But it's such a short amount of time before my back aches or my feet ache or I'm sweating and feel disgusting... Can't want for all these changes to add up to a better life. I just re-read this and realized my goal for physical fitness is to be able to do chores! HAHHAHHAHA - not climb a mountain, run a 5k - but do some chores. I can't tell if that's very sad or very Marge Simpson of me. lol!!

I had a breakdown point on the pre-op as well. Had dorito's and pepperjack cheese one night, naked at 300am. LOL!

JFAB! You are going to get there. It took time to gain it, it's going to take time to lose it. You don't want it gone too fast because skin will hang worse. So be patient ok? You are doing superbly! Just keep the nose to the proverbial grindstone and BE PATIENT. It WILL happen if you do what you are doing, with a few tweaks here and there, which you are working on. EIGHTY SIX POUNDS LOST!!!!! WOW in a short time. Better than 1/2 way there. ...... it's all about perspective! YOU GOT THIS!

I had my surgery 9 days ago. I was nervous as hell and afraid of dying the whole time I thought about having the surgery (I contemplate for 5 years). I am a single mother to a 16 year old girl. Well I am still alive and walking and talking. I am not really living with all this weight. My knees hurt, my ankles hurt. I am short of breath and that is what made up my mind. I was gonig to die early if I dont get rid of the weight. I was released from the hospital 24 hours post op and so far so good. Have faith!

Well, I think I got my answers.. my surgery is Sept. 28th, so Ill definitely have to quit smoking by the first of September. They told us 6 weeks prior is efficient enough, but then I was told by the nurse that she seen patients not stop smoking b4 or after surgery. I need to quit anyway, I've been smoking for over a decade & it's time to seize the nicotine! I deifnitely think I'll try E-cigs! =) Thank you guys for your feedback!!

I did a lot of research on these and ProSmoke had great ratings. I thought they were great, plus you can get different nicotine strengths, which really helps as you're weaning off them. The starter kits are really good deals, too. Here's a link: http://www.prosmokestore.com/

The best way I heard it explained was that you will notice but no one else will. You will see extra loss in the shower or when you brush it. Yes it is gross. I hated it. I am a year out now and the regrowth is about 4 inches long. I have long hair and if I look I can see the 4 inch pieces mixed within the long hair. Dont scare yourself to much.

On my way to my 1 week follow up, even though my surgery was actually last Friday. I have to say that I've got some seriously LOW energy. Since I sit on my booty all day at work, I'm glad I took most of this week off. I'm supposed to go back to work tomorrow, but think I will work from home. I just don't think I've got enough energy to get moving. I'm still not sleeping well because, wouldn't you know it, my siatic (sp?) nerve is starting to bug me when I go to sleep. Great timing for it to act up, huh? It makes for a heckuva sleepless night. I also don't think, never mind, I know I'm not getting enough protein in me. I've been feeling sooo full although I'm barely eating. I think I must be drinking too quickly. Trying to watch myself today because I start on soft foods. So far today, I've had 4 oz of a protein drink, and 1 oz of vanilla greek yogurt (with a dash of cinncamon for flavor). I'm waiting aobut 45 minutes before drinking anything again, but this schedule is tough. I planning ahead and bringing some of my snacks/meals with my 1st nutrition class & follow up apt so I don't miss out on anything (1oz of egg beaters & 1 oz of refried beans & something to drink). I know I've been losing weight because I've checked the scale. However, I try to be realistic because anyone would lose weight following a liquid diet. I don't expect miracles, but am thankful that I'm going in the right direction I still need to learn what my body is saying in the way of hunger vs the full feeling. The last few days it's always felt "full" which is insane beacuse I'm not eating much of anything. Nonetheless, today's nutrition class should be informative, and I look forward to it. Gonna go have my crystal light now. I'm thirsty.