Leaderboard

I havent been on here in a few days and since then ive been wondering.... WHY DO I HAVE TO BE ON LIQUIDS FOR FOURTEEN FREAKING DAYS!!!!!! okay but seriously i am so tired of water, powerade and tomato soup.... nothing else tastes good and now now I'm getting tired of the only things that tastes good -__- i move to soft foods on tuesday/wednesday and it cant come fast enough

Yup! You heard right! Weight loss surgery. Gastric Bypass to be exact! Am I excited? More than ever. Am I ashamed? Not in the least. If there's anything you should know about me, you should know I can't keep a secret. I can't keep things to myself, especially exciting things. Everyone in my life knows not to tell me anything, because I always end up spilling the beans sooner or later. It always starts out this way. I'll tell one person one thing and then think to myself, well, I already told one person, so why not tell another? One person becomes two, two becomes three, and so on and so forth. This is how it happened over the weekend while traveling by bus to NYC for my first day of graduate classes with my long time classmates. These are girls I've been in the same intense undergrad program with for two years. We're also potential social workers, so they're used to hearing about life transitions and making big decisions, etc. so I kind of felt comfortable with them knowing my "secret". Plus, I figure they're going to be wondering why I'm absent from classes for a week, and wtf is going on with me when I start shedding the weight. So, I told them! I told them all! It kind of just slipped out. I finally got to the NYC campus for my first day of grad classes, and noticed the desks were unbearably tiny (despite paying $30k a year, guys) and decided why panic? This will all be over soon! I'm proud of my decision to get the surgery. I have nothing to hide. I *have* tried every diet, been successful, unsuccessful, gained, lost, gained, etc. I know myself well enough to know this is something I want and need. Plus, I think by telling people rather than keeping it a secret, it helps to reduce the stigma attached to weight loss surgery and being obese in general. Typical bullshit responses I've gotten so far: Oh, well, my father's friend's mother's aunt got the surgery, lost a TON of weight, but regained everything back after like...3 years! Oh, gastric bypass? So you'll never eat again and be on a strict diet for the rest of your life? Oh, I see. They do WHAT to your stomach?? I hear you're going to spend the rest of your life throwing up...you don't want that One of my co-workers gained all the weight back and more. She eats McDonalds every day on her lunch break...and gained all the weight back...you don't want that, do you? You'll never be able to eat pizza again and all that good stuff. Maybe you should try another diet? I hear the FDA is approving a new weight loss pill this fall! You know..maybe if you just try exercising you may be able to lose some of the weight You're going to be needing iron infusions for the REST of your life So I have a few answers for this people... I'm NOT your father's friend's mother's aunt's sister's boyfriend's uncle...I'm ME Yes, I know what I'm doing No, you can't change my mind Yes, I've researched And YES, I'm ready to begin a new life!

The golden rules of eating post op *30/30 don’t drink within 30 minutes of starting or ending a meal. *Protein first veggies and fruits second and carbs if there is room *Avoid “white” or simple carbs eat only complex carbs * Drink!!! At least 64 ounces, 2 standard quarts Each day caffeinated beverages don’t count replace 1:1 with water *Protein at least 60 grams per day-vital to maintain strength *Vitamins and supplements for the rest of your life (get blood test periodically to check) *Medical Follow-up keep in touch with your Doctor keep your weight off *Support groups promotes accountability and sense of community *CHEW CHEW CHEW!!!!!!!!!!

So I was scheduled to have lap-band surgery Aug 28th with Dr. Almanza 45 min before the procedure they asked me if I wanted to change to VSG and i said YES! I had thought of changing but thought I was obligated (and had only paid) for the lap-band. They recommended the VSG over lap-band very highly and I changed to VSG. I'm glad i did, and am glad they let me. The experience there was great. I didin't get to stay at the recovery house (remodelling) but the clinica was exceptionally clean, staff was VERY attentive (i'm a RN) and i was very impressed with the care and cleanliness of the facilities. It's not fancy mind you, but it was a very good experience. Close and personal care is what i received. Never got in severe pain post op, meds brought every 4 hours on the money every-time... I would recommend this facility and Dr. Almanza to anyone who is considering VSG. THanks for reading my jumbled thoughts, kinda tired will post more some other time on the experience...

Today marks my 2 week mark since surgery... I must admit this has been a rough week. My sleeve has gotten fed up with all the sweets (sweet protein drinks, pudding, jello, fudgesicle, popsicles etc). To eat anyone of them anymore caused my stomach to be upset and I threatened throwing up several times...Top that all of with heartburn and finally getting to the point where I truly miss food...I am not at all hungry but I just want to chew. Some say chew gum but last time I did, I actually swallowed it so I am staying away from gum. I am on fluids for another week and then I moved to soft foods...Boy am I looking for to some salmon. I want sushi but not sure my sleeve will tolerate it. On the flip side, I did introduce foods that I did not like pre-surgery as I thought my taste buds would appreciate them now since they hadnt had much. Both cottage cheese and yogurt are on my full liquids list. I could not stomach either one before surgery but now I am loving both of them and given they are both high in protein that is a good thing... I also got into some pants I could not wear pre-surgery...My skin is clearing up because it doesnt have all the greasy fatty foods running through me...I love water now...and my pee is so clear and lady like... My incisions are healing quite well. I had glue and steri strips on my incisions and only two of the incisions (one being the largest one) still have on the strips. The tenderness is mainly gone but if I make a wrong move, I am reminded that I did get cut on recently. I also starting walking on the treadmill. I am doing 2.5 miles or 50 minutes...so a slow place...but did not want to push it too much. I plan on adding the other half mile next week...Get the walking on down so that at month one, I can begin to alternate walking and jogging...I even managed to mow a portion of my lawn on Wednesday. I left the hills to my ex boyfriend but I felt good I was able to do that without any pain. So while I had a rough week, I am not going to complain because this surgery is truly life changing. Sure the firsts few weeks are tough and everyday represents another day to stay committed to our new lifestyle but in exchange I get the body I have wanted a long time. I also get to participate in all the fun and crazy atheletic events (i.e. Tough Mudder) without fear of being the fat girl that gets stucks as the wall. So again I cannot be a complainer. I have such a wonderful future ahead of me thanks this tool. I have no regrets...no complaints... And for the numbers VSG 08/17/12 HT 5'8 HW 232 (08/13/12) SW 227 CW 212.8 Total Weight loss 19.2

Hi, I'm Jenn I figured I'd start a blog to document my journey - the good, the great, the not-so-great, and the downright ugly side of things without an ounce of sugar coating. Background: I'm 27, from Long Island, NY, and a Social Work graduate student going to school in the city. I'm set to graduate in May of 2013. I work primarily with clients struggling with substance abuse disorders and mental illness. This is an incredibly exciting time in my life. I've worked so hard to get to where I am, mentally, yet physically...well, I've kind of disregarded that area of my life for awhile now. I've been through some very difficult times growing up, and have put my body through some damage. After all the work I've spent on recovering mentally from all that's happened, I completely neglected to take care of myself physically. This has become a problem now, because although I'm finally happy with where my life is heading, I feel like I'm carrying a huge weight on my shoulders at all. I guess I kind of am! My BMI is 46. I struggle on a daily basis with 0 energy and horrible leg/knee pains. I have sleep apnea. I can't walk up a flight of stairs without breathing heavily. I hate being seen in public because of my weight. I'm 27, and I'm killing myself with food. I'm not going to wait around for it to destroy me. I'm ready to fight back. I am in the process of doing the (horrible) extensive pre-op testing. I am also doing 6 months of a supervised weigh-in/diet with my PCP. When completed, I will be set to have surgery in December. I am ready to feel 27. I'm ready to BE 27. And I won't take a "no" from anyone, nor will I tolerate any negative comments from people, I'm doing this for me

I need to express concern and frustration. I rescheduled an appointment a month ago but I misplaced my organizer so I put the new appointment into my phone then added it later to my organizer. Only I forgot to cross out the original appointment scheduled today Friday the 20th. I tried to call the office before I went at 851am but the phone rolled over To the message : office hours are 9-5. So I go and the receptionist says I indeed do Not have an appointment my appointment is the 24 th at 930 am. I mention I tried to call. She says" oh no I opened the phones at 830". I looked at my phone it shows I made the call at 851am she says "no no no the phone was ringing and being answered then". Ok wtf is the point of saying that to me? It came off so rude and she did it over and over. I left disgruntled not because I wasted my time but because of her attitude. This is making me nervous about the office staff. It's not the first time I have had an issue. When trying to schedule my counseling appointments which I have to pay out of pocket for the receptionist interrupted our scheduling to say she had to do something else and someone else would have to help me. She then answered the phone and scheduled someone else. I got upset because it was complicated confusing and she dumps me for another call. I walked out. This process is anxiety producing enough with out this crap from the staff. I thought everyone would be more encouraging and supportive and not nasty and confrontational. I might mention that I was not blaming them in anyway for the issue today that was all me. simply why in the world did she keep negating or denying that I had got their machine that morning. Seriously sigh Today started off well traffic wasn't to bad since my fiasco last week (see previous post) I "knew" my appointment was at 930am I got there at 915 went to the bathroom first signed in at 930 and sat until called when I di my day went down hill fast. The very nice scheduler said my appointment was at 900 am and the nutritionist had a 930 already. She said she was confused about which visit this was for me since she was on maternity leave when I started and my 3 month program was not set up right. I stood there and and started saying but I was here Friday and she told me my appointment was for 930. Then I did something I haven't done in literally years I burst into tears. The sweet receptionist took me into a private room and straighten out my "program" the scheduler Pam set up my surgery appointment , I got to see not only the nutritionist but the nurse practitioner for my " second" appointment ( the pre op exam and review). While the end result is I have my date I got some questions answered and reassurance from the staff I cried a lot and melted down completely which for me is not a comfortable feeling. When I was a new RN I cried when faced with any confrontation and I hated it. I trained my self not to cry in front of people of authority and to stand up for myself. I became a strong voice in my career so this breakdown brings back bad memories of a weaker self. I felt better when I left went to work and remained a little fragile all day. I cried a few times ( in private) but I made it through the day. I work tmr but have the rest of the week off for my birthday. Oh I forgot I freaking gained 2 lbs so they are pressuring me big time to lose 45 lbs before surgery. I have started my fitness pal and data entering all I eat it is working to curb my binging as I don't like entering to much lol I am being brutally honest and entering everything I eat. My plan is to begin low carb in earnest Monday kind of a modified Atkins because that the only diet I have ever tried that helps me resist sweets and that I feel strong and healthy while I do it.

What a month this has been! This month I made the decision to stop hiding my head in the sand and to take control of my health. It was not easy, but I no longer feel disappointed in myself. That decision motivated me to start doing small changes from now, so that when surgery comes along I will not feel overwhelmed. I'm determine to succed, so I came up with a plan for the next five months, that will hopefully get me on the right track. 20% of this is physical, the rest is all mental, well for me it is. I need to change the way I think, I know the 2 year old temper tantrum my mind can throw and the patience and reasoning the mature side needs to do, it's a constant battle not just about food but for exercise also. It's for this reason I started changing little things. I've heard that a takes 3 weeks to make a habit, I'm giving myself six weeks and not throwing a pity party when I slip, just get back on the wagon. So far, I've cut out sodas, drink 32-64oz of water per day and working on getting rid of my fast food habit. It's a bit more difficult but I'm getting better at it. This started as a weight loss, but as time goes by I see that the weight loss will only be part of it, I'm going for a full "make over". The funny thing is that I don't know what my "make over" entails, I believe I will figure it out in time. I had to put a plan, on paper, not only for my obsessive personality to have something visual, so that I can follow and see where I'm at, but also to have solutions to the common pitfalls and hills every time I try to lose weight.So instead of pretending it will not happen again, I'm preparing myself mentally for them. It's why I'm currently looking for a therapist who specialize in obesity. In order to have long term success, I will take whatever help is out there, no more head in the sand.

today I will take some pictures for the first time post op.Its been 5 and a half months now that I've still been avoiding the pics. My kid took some the morning of surgery (and some the morning after). I might even post them if I can see a difference.Being very body dismorphic doesnt make life easy.I have to see myself with my mind and not really my eyes as my eyes still see me almost exactly the same,but with a lot more wrinkles and drooping skin.My head tells me 88 pounds is a significant weight loss. S,lets see how brave I can be!

OK.. It was interesting. It was a little odd. It was an open forum where you could come and go between a three hour window. I was told to be there at 4 PM and not sure really why. Anyway, they gave me a 1400 calorie diet and told me to exercise more. I briefly met with a nutritionist and he was very nice! Had my first weigh in. UGH 275! My highest was 298 last year when my dad passed. I got down to 231 around August and now back up to 275. Sigh... Well, this is why I am here. I am still a bit confused. When I spoke with my insurance (Aetna), they told me a three month monitoring period instead of the six. The information the hospital (UPMC PGH) provided me was only for a 6 month program. I will find out more when I have my appointment on Sept. 4 with the Dr. **fingers crossed for 3 month program** There were so many new people. There had to be 20+ attending their first meeting. However, I can say I didn't know if I should be happy so many people were there to get healthy and have a better life or sad that there were so many of us at this point in our lives. We all know how hard the struggles are and the agony we go through, especially in private. I hope those people there know where to get support. This board is a great place and I am so far ahead of some of the folks there as far as knowledge. So keep sharing. Even if there are not a lot of responses, people are READING what you say. THANK YOU!! I plan on sharing this site to my new 'friends'. :-)