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I have a super-skinny friend who smokes. She is confused as to how people get really big--but not judgmental. As a former smoker, I was able to draw a comparison--the craving she felt when she needed a cigarette is very similar to the craving I felt for food. However, one cigarette would cure her craving, it took a large meal--like a restaurant meal plus--to make my craving go away. The light came on for her then......she said, "I guess the brain of a big person is wired differently because I never want to eat unless my stomach is growling." Of course, this lady WANTED to understand. She feels compassion for people who struggle with obesity and sees it as something she is very glad she doesn't have to deal with. So, realize that there are people out there that have a good attitude and will be supportive. Your coworker, sounds like a mean, judgmental person who basically needs to F&$@ off. You were nice. I would have said something very rude like, "funny, I don't recall giving a crap what you think" or something equally childish. It amazes me that some people feel free to vomit their opinions about your personal life all over you like that. Stay strong!

Don't hate because technically she was right. Anyone can lose weight with diet and exercise. So don't hate just let it motivate. I definitely believe you are making the right choice, but truth be told you don't hav to have surgery to weight. However my surgery changed my life and my outlook on exercise and diet. I was 379lbs in 2011 and had the VSG. Not because of my metabolism or genetics but because of diet and exercise. I had the VSG in March and now I am 186lbs. almost to my goal of 179lbs. I workout 5xs a week and stay far far away from processed sugar.

Wow girl - good for you! I love the come back. Most people have been very supportive to me, but I have had the few that didn't agree with my choice. I have two tiny sisters who can eat anything they want and still lose weight, I swear. They didn't say much, but both live far away and we don't talk much. Once the weight starts coming off and people notice how much happier you are (and you WILL be) they should be happy for you. Everybody is different and we all have to make the right choice for ourselves. Good Luck!!!

So i take it some of his insicurites are comming out as you thin down? is he maybe insecure about something within himself(is he a bit heavier then when you two where younger?). Maybe you should ask him what is truly eating at him and tell him that you won't get mad or upset but you just want to know what is bothering him and causing him to try to sabotage your efforts.

you hubbys attitude "that you could lose weight on your own " is ridiculous ! If that was the case there wouldnt be a billion dollar diet industry ! (yes, i said "billion dollar !") Thats like telling a diabetic that she could cure her diabetes "on her own !!" if she just ate right. Ummmmm. no. The weight doesnt always magically fall off just because you diet and exercise. Your body doesnt always cooperate. Ask the hubby if certain parts of his body have a mind of its own ! (Yeah, i said it !!) well hubby , welcome to the world of obesity !! Having a positive partner is very important, but your not obligated to change his small minded attitude. Do this for yourself ! good luck !

I've chosen to tell people... for a few reasons. 1) One of my core values is honesty. When someone I care about asks me what I've been up to, it would be difficult not to mention the research that has consumed me, while considering a life altering procedure. (this does not mean I feel the need to announce it on facebook or to people who are more like acquantances.) 2) I *want* to hear the horror stories. I want to make an informed decision... if anyone I know has a friend that had this procedure who regretted it... I want to know! 3) I have been at this weight for 20 years, and everyone in my work and personal circles know that even on a diet of 1600 calories a day, I do not lose weight... when I am suddenly losing multiple pounds a week... I would rather not have to make up stories that are unbelievable. 4) If I should have any complications in the future, I want the people who surround me to understand how they can help me. I've shared my concerns, my research, my possible future with more than 20 people... and have recieved overwhelming support, which has only affirmed the path I am on. This includes three of my doctors, and a friend I worried about telling the most, who cried with me, and offered to help me pay for the procedure. The people who love me want me to be healthy and pain-free (I'm already happy), and to avoid suffocating in my sleep (I have severe sleep apnea). I do know how very blessed I am, with a loving and supportive community. I wish the same for everyone!