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It amazes me how much my body has changed in only five weeks. Rolls are smaller, my side boobs are almost gone, and my stomach is semi flat (though still big). My legs are changing and shaping and my boobs are shrinking to the smallest they have been since college....when I used to think they were very large. If I have changed this much is such a short time, I can't even imagine what I will look like in a year. The idea of being around 150 pounds is still unreal to me. I know it's my goal and I am doing everything I need to in order to make my goal, but it still seems crazy to me to think I could ever bee that thin. I wasn't even that thin in high school. Yesterday I took the plunge and tried on my bathing suit. I knew when I bought it two years ago that it was too small for me, but I didn't care. I shoved every inch of fat into it and enjoyed myself on the beach or in the pool. That won't be the case this year. First, it went right on with no wiggle-wiggle. You girls know what I mean. The moving your body and the garment in an attempt to get it up and over your ___________(fill in the blank). Nope, this time it slid right up. It fit perfectly and I looked good in it. Not model good, but good. I will no longer have to pretend that I feel comfortable at the beach, because now I will be. I was so excited that I came running out of the bedroom to tell my husband only to find him passed out on the couch taking a nap. So, I decided to jump into the car and drive the mile to my parent's home and show my new body to my mother. I was smart enough to throw some clothes on before running out the door. I think it would be a little strange to see a woman driving in her bathing suit this early in the summer. I do live near a beach, so it's not as uncommon as you may think. I literately walked into the house, said hello and stripped down to my bathing suit. Lucky for me my mother is very understanding and didn't demand me to stop stripping in her kitchen. Instead, she looked me up and down and told me how wonderful I look. Yea, I look wonderful in a bathing suit. LOL Then to make my weekend even better, I tried on a pair of Old Navy sweats I bought prior to my surgery. They couldn't get over my but when I bought them but now, they fit just perfectly. I am really liking this weight loss thing that comes from getting a sleeve. I wish someone would have told me this would have been a side affect. I would have done it a long time ago. LOL Just kidding. The only side affect I didn't really know about was how good I would really feel and not just because the clothes fit. It's more just feeling better all around. Knowing I did something for me that is making me healthier every day. Now, if weight loss is a part of that, I'll take it. I will also take feeling good in a bathing suit (both kinds) because, that's something I haven't felt .... well, ever.

I'm two days post-op and I'm actually surprised at how good I feel. It feels like I did about 500 sit-ups, my stomach is pretty sore, but other than that I feel great. I haven't felt one bit of hunger. I spent the first afternoon and full post-op day 1 sipping a protein drink and water, then today started in following the two weeks of liquids menu my surgeon/dietician gave me. Breakfast called for 8 ounces of Greek Yogurt. I got about 4 ounces in and felt full. It was an amazing feeling! Before the band I would NEVER feel full. It was a different feeling - it was more in my chest than my stomach, but I felt the signal and at the first sign I knew to stop. I'm comitted to being a good bandster, so I'm following the rules to a T. Tomorrow I'm set to go back to work and I think I'll be fine. The surgeon said as long as I felt okay, going back 3 days post-op would be okay. My post-op appointment is May 30th and this morning I weighed in at 222.4. I would love nothing more to be in the 215ish range when I see the surgeon, so it's time to step up the exercise.

Well Diane is having her own personal pity party. Go figure. I got my feelings hurt yesterday probably not the first time nor will it be the last but this time I am really having trouble shaking it. So who was the wonderful person who decided to be so honest with me my "loving husband", I type that with much sarcasm and anger at this moment. As all of you on this site know I have lost a lot of weight over the past 19 months, 103 lbs to be exact. I am very proud of the fact that I have been able to be successful with lapband and it has not been without ups and downs and struggles along the way. So what did the "jerk" say that hurt so much. Well here it goes, we were working outside trying to get the pool open and I had to get in the pool to srub the sides and bottom so I went to put on a swim suit. OMG, as I am sure all of you are aware of is that when you lose a lot of weight your skin does not always snap right back into place. Go figure, right! Well Mr. Brilliant says to me, "Honey, you know you are damn sexy looking except for one thing." WHAT? He repeats himself, now knowing he has crossed the path of no return. EXCEPT for WHAT??? Well I am not sure you know it or not but your THIGHS really look just AWFUL. Oh yeah, he did say it. I think I turned into let me see a TIGER, no may be a RATTLESNAKE, or may be it was SCORPION. So WTF?? Does he not think I look in the mirror everyday and see what I look like without my cloths on? Why does he think I am literal working my ASS off at a gym 3 times a week and doing cardio 6-7 days a week. So have you figured out I am just a little touchy about how I look? I have been struggling for months with my body image, I still saw the fat me for months when I looked into the mirror it was not until just the past month that I was starting to accept the new me. Starting to notice that working out was paying off, I even felt my thighs were looking better, not perfect. But for real, I used to weigh 252 lbs on 5'1' frame what do you expect. I am just hurt, pissed, mad and just can't believe he said it. So what did I do last night, I binged. I reverted back to an old behavior. Well of course binging these days is much different than before, but still I hate the fact that I allowed what someone said to cause me to go back to an old coping behavior. So today I feel hurt, guilty and just totally like a failure. I have tried all day to make this into a positive but I am struggling, I am trying to be a big girl and realize that everyone has an opinion but I guess my feeling is that because he said it, it is how he really feels. So to him, I look awful. I looked awful fat and I look awful thin, so what now. Well I guess I could continue to feel sorry for myself and give into bad past behaviors or I can just put this into prospective. I know I have lose skin, that is a given. I know I have worked to do to try and tighten up, that is also a given and why I hired a personal trainer and am working my butt off. I spent my afternoon reading the forums for other posts that could help me and this is one I read that really hoped me put into prospective what I feel: "Don't listen to the inner dialogs that continues to put you down despite your success. Because it won't suddenly start happening once you get plastic surgery. Choose to celebrate your achievements now." To take the above statement a little further I will not allow others to sabotage what I have worked so hard to achieve. I could chose to have plastic surgery to rid my self of the lose skin I have but I have chosen to try and tighten up with exercise, it takes longer may not be perfect but I do not want the scars that come with plastic surgery. I will not go back to being that person, the person who used cheeseburgers, chips and Fry's to comfort her. I don't want to be that person, I will not be that person and further more I am not that person anymore. So there hubby take that, maybe you have your own issues you need to work out to deal with the fact that "YOUR" wife looks "HOT" OK maybe that's a little much but you get the point. So first I am forgiving myself for failing myself and not using what I have learned for the past year and a half and than I am going to forgive the "jerk" I am married to for hurting my feelings. I may not tell him for a few days because I think he needs to realize just what a "HUGH" mistake he made. Because you see I have another character flaw, I may forgive but I never forget...........................

so for the past week I have been exercising seriously.With that goes the weight that gets stuck even though you expect to lose load just by sweating..lol I am learning to make peace with the slow weight loss.I srill second guess myself all the time about food but I guess I am doing fine when all is said and done. Now I just have to keep it up,eating good proteins and fresh veggies. xxo

Yes every year i look foward to those blended ice drinks frapacoino , strawbery lemonaid aid slusshy i just love them. so I can stil have them just in a diffent way i thought i share some of my cool summer idea to help me with my love of ice blended drinks This one is called Elivis Has Left the building 1/4 a cup of greek youget ( i uses trader joes becuse it has the least suger around and less callors . 1. Table spoon of peanunut butter ( Trader joes make a Ruduced Gilt one that tast like a reecee peanutbutter cup that is on 100 calloris per 2 table spoon when i mentoned it to my nurtionist she said That she hears about this peanutbutter All the time and how every seems to love it) 8 oz of milk ( I uses soy I like earh blance soy the best 0 1/2 a bannna and Ice Blend well sip slowly other of my favorits is Carmel Curch 8 oz of milk ( again i like soy) 1 scoop of vanilla protione powder ( i like Unjury or Iopure ) 1 Table spoon of butter scoch suger free pudding 1 table spoon of carmmel syrupr ( suger free ) I like a little more Ice Other of my favorits is Starbery Cheese cake smoothy 1 soop of vaniila protine powder 1 table spoon of cheese cake suger free pudding 8 oz of milk ( I use soy again 1/2 cup of starberrys Ice blend Craving a Frapaconio Hazlenut Mocchcion 8 0z of soy milk 1 scoop of Cholet protine powder 1 tea spoon of decfae instent cofffee 1 pacakge of splend 1 tea spoon of halznut suger free sypryp Frozen starberry lemonaid 1 cup of crysltal light lemmonid i like the alll teady to go packs i scoop of UNjenery strabbbery sherbert powder Ice Blened well As a kid how meny of you enjoy snow cones. Guess what you can still have them just make them useing suger free sypup I have 13 diffent flavover If any one wants more i have a ton more of these yummmy frozen ice treats I have one each morning

I had indigestion prior to my sleeve surgery. It was rare, but when I did have it, it was bad. So, I got a pill to make it all better. When I looked into getting the sleeve, I was excited to see that my stomach juices would calm down and this feeling of wanting to just throw up would never happen again. Boy, was I wrong. I hate to say this, but it's only gotten worse. I went from taking my pill once a week to every day and I still feel the indigestion. Sometimes I wonder if the surgeon gave me some extra "stomach juice switches" and didn't tell me. That seems to be the only thing that makes sense to me. I don't eat things that I shouldn't, and I really don't eat much at all, so what is causing this other than my surgeon playing a trick on me? Now, I know my surgeon didn't do anything to me except take out most of my tummy and staple the part she left. However, it feels as though she replaced my stomach with a volcano and all it wants to do is BLOW. I've never wished that I could just throw up but today, that is how I feel. I've tried everything. I've taken my meds, taken Tums, and even drank some milk. The milk seems to be the only thing that has worked except for the walking. However, I can't walk all night long. Last time I tried walking at night I almost got ran over. I would hate for my indigestion to cause me to end up in the hospital with broken bones because a stupid driver wasn't paying attention. So, I think I'll stick with the milk for now. So, that's all. Nothing else to say. I just wanted to vent about the volcano and the acid that wants nothing more than to escape from mouth. A few weeks ago I wished to get rid of all the farting and burping. Now that this has started, I pray the farts and burps will come back....at least they didn't keep me up at night. Though I can't say the same for my poor husband.