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Hi Everyone, Well yesterday I did manage to hit the 64oz mark Hooray! I felt really proud of myself, how daft, to be proud because I can drink fluids!!! Oh well, it must be because I am still on an incredible high, I can't believe how positive and good I feel. Hope this feeling carries on forever. Another good nights sleep last night and I even slept some of the night over on my side (not quite all the way but enough to give my poor butt some relief).I have been doing a few things about the house but not much. I feel full of energy go and do something small...and the next minute I feel worn out, weary and in need of a rest. I know my stamina will build up as I get further out from my op and start taking on more protein etc. Luckily my husband is taking care of anything that I don't feel able to do. Mmmmmm...I wonder if I can convince him that spring cleaning is absolutely necessary in the next few days!!! The burping is easing off, and not all day like it was at first. Now it tends to be when I have a full drink, like chicken soup or protein drink. It is still pretty impressive but I don't think I would win gold now! Oh well, there go my hopes of an olympic medal. I am getting in as much walking as possible but in short bursts. I can only seem to do about ten minutes at a time at the moment. I am hoping that will improve as I go along. Things are still good for me and I hope everyone else has a good a time of it as I am having.

Ok folks- I'm going to expose my inner nerd a little here, so don't go telling anyone that I'm not as cool as all that, ok? I finally broke the 300 lb. barrier and am soooo excited to be in the 200s again. Ok, I'm only at 296, but that counts. So as I lift my eyes to look across the span of the next 100 lbs, I'm feeling a little like Frodo when he and Sam finally get into Mordor and look across to Mount Doom. (After all the spider trauma, of course;) ) All they see is a vast wasteland filled with threatening foes waiting to take them down. But, on the other side....Frodo knows that freedom from the burden chained around his neck awaits. I know the freedom from this weight is coming. It just looks so daunting right now. Such a loooooong.....rocky....journey. But I'm ready. I know it's not magic, and it's going to take hard work. But when I get there, the relief will be soooooooo SWEET!!!!! I can't wait to cast it into the fire!! Nerd moment over. Carry on.

Dear Food, I know you think I'm stupid for talking to you because...well, you're food and you can't hear me. I just want to tell you that it's been quite a ride these last 42 years. We've had our ups and ups and ups and ups and downs and ups and ups. It's time for our relationship to change. I'm not breaking up with you, because I still need you to live, however, our relationship has to change now. And really....believe me when I say...It's not you. It's me. I'm the one with the problem, so don't ever blame yourself. You're really sweet. And salty. And delicious...OH WHAT AM I SAYING....how can we ever part?? NO!! We must part for a time. Two weeks- no more than five, I promise. When we come back together- things will be different. You must hide your sweetness from me. Don't tempt me further with your refinements. I want to see the REAL you....the one with all the vitamins and minerals and protein...yes...I said protein. Hey, I told you things were going to change. And for pete's sake, stop bringing your friends around! But don't worry...you'll always have a place...sorta...close to my heart... No, I didn't have a mental break. I start liquids Monday. (siiiigh)

Happy Friday!!! I am so pleased that the weekend is almost here! So a few weeks ago I blogged about a co-worker who is banded and seems to struggle a lot. I felt bad for her and could not understand. Well over the last week I have gotten a clear understanding of why and it pisses me off a bit. I am not any better than anyone, nor do I think I know all the answers. What I do know are the basics. We work so hard to get our bodies ready for the surgery and go through so much afterwards, why would you just say screw it? We had a celebration for our top performers today and the snacks were candies, cookies and juices. I was in charge of passing out the snacks and she came to the line three times and ate skittles, starburst and capri sun. Then she ate a hot pocket. I again am not perfect but I know these things are not good for us, especially with the band. Afterwards she came to ask me how long has it been since my surgery because I was losing weight fast. I explained I was five weeks out and had started to exercise again. She told me she has had 5 fills and she is really tight but can still eat some food. I told her maybe it was time go back to the see the doc. Her reply was that she would be going back to have it taken out since the band " failed" her........ It was not my place to suggest it may be the behavior and not the band, so I just said I was sorry to hear that. WHY??? It is not a quick fix, it will not stop us from making bad food choices, nor will it stop you from possibly wanting to eat those things. I just did not know what to say and it made me feel annoyed that she feels that the "band" failed her. We have to eat right, exercise and take care of ourselves. The band is only a tool. Now I am back to feeling sorry for her because I think she wants someone to help her but I dont know if I am that person. She is seven months down the line and I am a newbie just trying to get my own bearings....

Hello. I just got my surgery date today, and so I thought it might be a good time to start writing down the story of this journey. I'm scheduled to have my VSG done on April 9th. As soon as I got off the phone with the surgeon's office this afternoon, I ate a piece of chocolate. So, yes, I'm a little nervous about it. Chocolate, cookies, or cake, preferably with milk -- these are my coping mechanisms of choice. The past five days or so I've been experimenting with the pre-op diet. A day on the pre-op diet involves drinking a couple of high-protein shakes, eating one low-carb/high protein meal, drinking a lot of water, and following a schedule of multivitamins, calcium, and iron throughout the day. (7:00AM - multivitamin, 10:00AM - calcium citrate, 12:00PM - calcium citrate, 2:00PM - calcium citrate, 5:30 - multivitamin, 8:30 - iron with vitamin C) The pre-op diet also means avoiding fats, sugar, and sweets, not snacking between meals, and steering clear of carbohydrates in general -- no bread, pasta, rice, or potatoes, and no fruit, fruit juice, or (gasp) sweet tea. So what's left that I can eat? Well, it's quite a lot like the low-carb diet I used to do way back when I lost 122 lbs., and before I gained it back again. That is, I can eat green vegetables, small quantities of lean meat, a little cheese, nuts, sugar free pudding, and...um...I think that's it. After about two days of this pre-op diet, I was careening around the grocery store in a weak and dizzy state ogling the boxes of frosted cookies and coming to terms with the idea that very soon I will never ever again be able to eat the things I love, at least, not in the way I have done for the past thirty years. Do I really want to undertake the horribly difficult challenge of a major lifestyle change? Most of the time, I think the answer is "yes," but that day in the store, face to face with the cookies, something deep inside of me shrank back and cried "nooooo!" Madam Bones is a very minor character in the Harry Potter series, and while I do admire the character and her role in the books, I chose to use her name in this forum because to me the name "Madam Bones" brings to mind, of course, the word "bony." Not the skeletal kind of bony, but the kind of bony where you can tell that the person has cheekbones and knuckles, ankles and elbows. A strong, slim, healthy, kind of woman who enjoys participating in life. She can run, tie her shoes with ease, sleep without a CPAP machine, and climb the stairs without huffing and puffing. There is a Madam Bones lurking somewhere inside this prison of obesity, and I'm going to set her free.