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Today it has been 10 months since I started this journey to find my other butt! Ten months have gone by so fast, and so much has happened, I don't know where to begin. So I will try to be brief, and let a couple of photos speak the volumes that I have to say! I am down more than 130 pounds, and I've honestly lost track of how many sizes. Let's see.. I'm wearing a size 28 waist jeans now.. not sure how that translates but I'm guessing it's a size 8, maybe 7. I only have 1 pair of jeans that fits perfectly right now, the rest get held up with a belt! I'm okay with that for awhile. I wear a size large shirt.. sometimes a medium, depending on style. The girls have begun to shrink. And I must say, on that note, to be careful what you wish for.. I now have pancake boobs... or darn close to pancakes anyway, and bra style is EVERYTHING!! hehe! Most of my shoes are big on me now which is something that still surprises me ten months later, because I never thought of how fat my feet used to be. I may have mentioned in an earlier post how much my wardrobe has increased because I now have three closets to choose from instead of just one.. definitely a bonus! I continue to be unrecognizable to lots of people. I still find it entertaining, and funny! When I look at old pictures of myself, I'm stunned, and can't believe the difference... so I completely understand how people who I don't see very often have no idea who I am!! My life has changed in all of the ways you might have guessed, and in many ways that I never would have expected. I am understanding even more why lap-banders are required to go through a psychiatric evaluation before they can be approved for surgery. Such huge life-changing things happening inside of such a relatively small space in time could truly send a person spinning off into nutzoid land. I think I'm doing pretty well at keeping my distance from said nutzoid land most of the time, but others may disagree! Here's a couple of photos taken this morning by my daughter-in-law who had me laughing hard the whole time! I have to say I still look at photos and think I look a little fat. I guess I'll always have issues. A friend of mine reminded me this morning that the camera adds ten pounds so maybe I should just go with that! I'm not done yet, but getting very close! It's after 3am and I can't remember the other things I was going to write, so I'll just call this good! Thanks for stopping by! Oh.. and NO I didn't dye my hair red! The lighting kinda makes the natural red in my hair shine in these pics though huh?! Looks like I could only add one photo for whatever reason.. you can see one more if you visit my blog at: http://www.myotherbutt.blogspot.com

I am down to 210 this morning! That means I've lost 49 pounds since the beginning of my pre op diet which started November 11th. I am sooooo happy!! I am going to buy myself a pandora bracelet along with two charms. I want to buy myself a charm for every 20 pounds lost. I bought myself a couple pairs of jeans. Not only were they on clearance (only 14 bucks for 2 pairs of jeans!!) but one was even a size 14!! I cannot remember the last time I was in a size 14!! So exciting! As my last post stated, I just received my second fill last week. So far so great!! I know I'm most likely still swollen, but I have great restriction right now as well as little to no hunger. Next week will be the deciding factor on whether I'm in the green zone or not. Happy V Day everyone!

I looked in the mirror this morning and I could actually see that I've lost some weight in my face. That made me very happy

In hindsight I find myself thinking about all the time - all of my adult life, all of my teenage years, most of my childhood, I have fought my fat. I have gone out and played harder, ate less, denied minding that I couldn't wear what some of the other kids were wearing (which would actually be true as I entered my high school years). I became strong and fit (for my size) as I also became a f@%k you kid with an attitude and patient yet short fuse... I had feelings but never felt them, I had friends and never cared. I became a great artist. I am really good at alot of things. I have two degrees and I am on the dean's list going for my third. I am who people come to when something needs fixing - and no one had a clue how desperate I was to fix myself. Only in the last few years do I think my Hubby even knew. My sister knew, and tried to help - and finally understood she could nox fix me. Frustrating for her, horribly frustrating for me - I never wanted my Sister to ever have a bad day - especially if it were my doing. I could go on and on but I think the main point is that I lived for over 30 years in a state of semi-misery, while being truly happy, successful, and able to extend myself to friends and hobbies and a healthy marriage. I watched my weight fluxuate and I tried harder and sometime not so hard. I avoided all the fad diets - I had educated myself too much and knew what it would do to my muscle mass. Yet I really wanted to try them - you want to believe anything you hear first-person. It's just so easy to say "so-n-so did it". I can quilt because my Granny taught me - I can sew clothing because I was going to wear what I wanted to wear - so I learned to recreate what I saw in the mall windows. I never let anything get in my way - except I did - or did I? That is the thing I think I need to come to grips with most - even as I lose the weight now, I am finding slips of thought finding it's way in. I will never know if I could have done it "myself". If I could have unraveled my own Gorgon Knot - but then I did, right? On hell-bent swipe of a sword and I am doing it. Dichotomy! Damn! Damn...

Haha I've been doing liquids for so long, I forgot I could eat eggs for breakfast, duh! Oh well - tomorrow I've hit that stall period, so I've put the scale away for 10 days. Not a big deal to me, I knew it was coming